Dear You--

I don't know why it's so hard to say these things to you. When we were just friends, I could talk to you about anything and everything. But now it seems everything has changed.

We've been together for six months now. At first it was wonderful, I was so happy. But lately..it's almost seems as though you are a completely different person around me. It feels like you don't even want to be around me. What changed? I can barely talk to you anymore. And I know that life gets in the way. College mostly, and I'm well aware that my job is killing me. But every time I'm free, you're busy. You 'want to spend time alone' (which I can understand) or you want to 'spend time with [insert friend here]' (which I can also understand). But..you want to be alone, then go spend time with someone else. You see friends constantly while I'm working (which I know is 6 days out of the week). Do you just not want to spend time with me?

You know I've been spending a lot of time with him lately, and that doesn't seem to bother you at all. You know I've been talking to him far more than you. And you are well aware of his feelings for me. But I don't want him..I want you. However that doesn't seem to matter to you at all. You don't seem to care that I'm becoming closer to him than I am to you. Isn't there something wrong with that? Or is my logic that screwed up?

I don't know anymore. I'm starting to question if I still love you, wondering if it really would hurt if I ended this now. Would you feel anything if I left? I can't so much as get a single kiss out of you lately. Do you still care..or are you just waiting for me to leave so you don't have to?

--Me

dear you

i miss you and who you used to be. you used to be happy, and you used to be content. you used to know where you stand, and not worry about it for a single moment. i miss the others, and how well we all used to fit in. i miss the acceptance, and the not caring. i miss the fun and time wasted at drug mart. i miss everyone before things seemed to change. i miss not having to worry about who i would spend my time with the next week, and always knowing all of you were there. i miss getting mad at my parents for not accepting you, not letting me hang out with you, and making me be home by five. i miss the crazy stories, and time spent doing the most random things. i miss being your best friend. now whenever i talk to you, i just get shunned off and ignored for the most part. i miss who i used to be, and who all of you used to be. i miss not having to cry as much as i seem to now. i miss sitting around and just listening to the what seemed to be endless collection of CDs. i miss staying up until 2 in the morning talking to you on the internet.

i miss who all of you were before drugs came into your lifes. they have effect what you look like, you sence of humor, and your personality. i miss smiling just because i was with you.

you were all my best friends, and i think about the old days every moment. i doubt you still feel the same about me one ounce, but i hope you know how lonely i am without you.

you have my best memories.