InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Ooh Mr. Darcy Oooh!"

otherbuck (otherbuck) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2021-02-05 06:07:00

Entry tags:

!open, bucky barnes (au), johnn redel, miguel o'hara (other)

I am still here.

I don't know why, I just didn't get sent back with the others once that asshole died. if it bothers you, I'm on Wheel 4 at [location that's near within walking distance of the Other camp but isn't particularly close]. I don't care if you come after me but there's a young girl staying nearby, do not bother her.

to anyone in the medbay:

I am an amputee. my left arm was surgically removed 6 inches below my shoulder about 15 years ago. other than low-level pain and occasional phantom limb sensations, it has not bothered me in a long time and I'm able to do what I need to on my own. is there any reason I can't continue to live without a prosthetic?

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	completelyauto 2021-02-07 07:06 am UTC (link)
	Please do. [Private] As I offered an olive branch; If you decide to turn against any of us and make yourself a threat, I will turn you inside out. Do you understand? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private otherbuck 2021-02-07 07:40 am UTC (link)
	jesus fuck does it actually count as an olive branch if you use it as a threat? and y'know, just out of curiosity, what have I done that makes you think you need to do that? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private completelyauto 2021-02-07 08:04 am UTC (link)
	You misunderstand me, Bucky. I never made a threat, only a promise. Is it not obvious? You stole someone else's life. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private otherbuck 2021-02-07 08:06 am UTC (link)
	I didn't know that's what would happen. I knew there needed to be a counterpart here but we didn't know they'd go away. ~~Higgs fucked us too~~ besides, he's here now. he's fine. I didn't do anything to him (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Private

completelyauto
2021-02-07 08:37 am UTC (link)

Mmm. No. No you did not. I may be too close to this situation. People from your Station beat and replaced people that are very close to me. That, I can not "forgive and forget." But you had nothing to do with them, right?

But, you did have something to do with the situation. For over a month, you stole our Bucky's life. You replaced him. You knowingly did so. Yes, he is here now. Through our efforts. What did you do, other than keep yourself hidden, while we fought for our and their lives?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private otherbuck 2021-02-07 08:46 am UTC (link)
	would you really have let me fight on your team? if I showed up and said I wanted to help you fight him, do you really think the people here would have trusted me? would have assumed anything other than that I was his spy? I didn't help him. I assumed I would go back if he lost and I accepted that. I did what I could. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private completelyauto 2021-02-07 09:04 am UTC (link)
	Perhaps not, we may not have trusted you. Yet, you never made an effort to gain our trust, did you? It would have shown more to your character to have helped us in our fight against Higgs. You may not have actively helped him. But, by doing nothing, you helped him more than you realize. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private otherbuck 2021-02-07 09:07 am UTC (link)
	I've been here for like 2 months and none of you trust me still. what do you think I could have done in a week or two that would have changed that? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Private

completelyauto
2021-02-07 09:17 am UTC (link)

Trust is a two-way street. You could have come to almost any of us and be given help. We are not monsters.

Please, I ask that you do not mistake my words for anger against you. They come from a place of frustration over the situation. If you are "stuck" here, let us make the best of it. I would like to help you..

I offered you help with your arm, though I know you do not want it, my offer will always stand.

And, I only made the same promise I would with anyone who would decide themselves a threat to me or my family. I would hope you are not.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private otherbuck 2021-02-07 09:20 am UTC (link)
	I don't need help. I didn't need help then. I don't know why everyone seems to think I need to be fucking fixed. there's nothing wrong with me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Private completelyauto 2021-02-07 09:30 am UTC (link)
	The workings of the human mind are far from my forte. But, the fact that you focused on that element of what I just said to you.. Perhaps you do need help? I do not want to fix you, I simply offered you an arm. That is my forte. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Private

otherbuck
2021-02-07 09:37 am UTC (link)

you said I should have asked for help, why would I do that if I didn't need it? what could I need? the station provides for you here. even with Maryanne hoarding all the food she could get her hands on we were still able to find more here than we would have in months where we were. we didn't have to worry about the oxygen failing, about getting sick.

you all didn't exactly roll out the welcome wagon either.

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