InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "SQUISHY!"

Jade (gracelessangel) wrote in colligo_threads,
@ 2010-11-01 00:14:00

Entry tags:

!closed, #complete, gabriel, jade

WHO: Jade and Gabriel
WHAT: A post-death reunion and chat.
WHEN: [Backdated] Shortly after this; 2PM.
WHERE: The gazebo beside the lake.
RATING: Totally kid-friendly.
STATUS: Complete. Closed.

Jade couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so level-headed. Since finding herself miraculously returned from the dead, she had managed to stay away from drugs entirely and was finding it made quite a difference. Yes, some things were harder to cope with. But her thoughts were her own. Her actions were hers, as well. Nothing was due to the smack or the absinthe. It was all authentic, for better or worse.

It helped that Cas was going through it too. He'd opted to quit, cold turkey (something she still wanted to throttle him for from time to time), when she'd died. Now that she was back they were support for one another. But she couldn't spend all her time around him. She had other things she had to deal with and she figured, so long as she was thinking clearly and still on the not-using side of her addiction, she should take advantage of it.

So she'd decided to meet with Gabriel. Sitting at the gazebo, her feet propped up on the railing facing the lake and her hands resting lightly on her thighs, Jade tried to get her thoughts in order. She stared out across the water, going over everything for what felt like the millionth time. Gabriel was due there any minute and she hoped, by the end of their talk, they'd be a bit closer to deciding just where they stood with one another once and for all.

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gracelessangel
2010-11-03 12:17 am UTC (link)

What now? It was a good question. Jade smiled softly to herself as she considered it for a moment. Finally she glanced up at him. "I don't know," she answered truthfully. "I-"

She stopped and seemed to reconsider; she looked back to the water with a contemplative look on her face. "I love you, Gabriel," she murmured quietly, fingers gripping the railing as though it were keeping her upright. "I'll always love you and nothing is ever going to change that."

With a soft exhale, Jade gave him a small, sad smile. "But I can't give myself to you when I don't even know who I am. And it isn't fair of me to expect you to wait until I can."

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archaic_rival
2010-11-03 01:47 am UTC (link)

He swallowed hard as her words caught him in the chest, knocking a breath from him that he hadn't known he was holding. Closing his eyes, he drew her into his arms and held her tightly, protectively.

"If not me, than who can you expect to wait?" he murmured, his voice muffled in her hair. "I love you too, Jade, and my friendship is yours for eternity. But I would never ask for more than you feel you have to give. Just having you alive and well is enough."

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gracelessangel
2010-11-03 02:38 am UTC (link)

Despite the fact that the embrace tore at her heart and made her second guess her resolve, Jade still welcomed it in a way. She wasn't lying. She would always love Gabriel. Just not in the way she'd thought she always would. She could see it now and she would be a fool to ignore it.

Resting her cheek against his chest, her fingers danced across his shoulder for a moment while she thought of what to say. She inhaled deeply and straightened, turning in his arms and facing him. Their foreheads were practically touching; her eyes shone brightly as she offered him a small smile.

"I want you to be happy," she murmured before pulling back a little. Her tone was as bittersweet as her smile became. She tucked some hair behind her ear.

"Jo makes you happy, Gabe. And you do the same for her."

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archaic_rival
2010-11-03 02:51 am UTC (link)

He released her, but left his hands resting gently on her shoulders. A weight had been lifted from between them, but his heart ached with letting go, the way one's hands might have done after holding on too tightly for too long.

"I hope someday you find your own happiness as well," he said, leaning down to kiss her cheek. "Please tell me you won't be a stranger."

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gracelessangel
2010-11-03 03:11 am UTC (link)

"I'm happy just to be your friend," she assured him as she rose up and pressed her lips to his cheek as well.

Jade felt better. A little sad, a part of her mourning the end of something that had been very important to her for what felt like a very long time. But it was the way it was supposed to be. She knew that, somehow. She'd known it for a while and had just been too afraid to act on it.

"And you're not getting rid of me that easily," she teased him with another smile, this one much brighter than before. She stepped out of his embrace, wrapping her coat around herself to stave off the wind.

"Take care, Gabe, and try to remember that you don't have to shoulder everything, all the time." She grinned impudently. "You always were an overachiever," she joked as she turned on her heel and headed back toward the apartments feeling a bit more at peace than she had before.

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