Entry tags:

!closed, #complete, *log, aziraphale, castiel, gabriel, god, loki, michael

[ part two of two ]
WHO: God and: Castiel, Gabriel, Michael, Aziraphale, and Loki
WHAT: Before leaving Colligo, the Almighty pays a visit to each of her angels, individually.
WHEN: From Sunday (Mother's Day) to Wednesday afternoon
WHERE: Various locations around the city
RATING: PG-13 (language, mostly)
STATUS: Complete; logs
NOTES: Part two of two. Part one can be found here.

Aside from Loki, whose conversation was primarily going to be little more than a simply given order, God had only Aziraphale left to speak with. She had saved him for next to last because not only did he require the least amount of guidance in her absence but she also knew to speak with him was going to reveal certain things that she did not wish to force him to dwell upon for long. She wasn't going to tell him anything specific, of course, but she also knew that Aziraphale was hardly a fool and was much more insightful than most gave him credit for being. She simply wouldn't have to say anything specific for him to pick up on the inferences.

Stepping into his bookshop, God glanced briefly around with a smile upon her face. The place had changed recently and not necessarily in a bad way. It was good to see him willing to actually sell books now. Granted she knew he would never willingly part with those that he held dear to him, but knowing that he was at least offering something to those who visited his shop pleased her. She had never commented on his propensity to not share the tomes with others, nor would she, but she knew that there were at least a handful who would find books within his shop that created within them a desire to continue to read. The fact that large stores sold the very same items was irrelevant. Aziraphale's personal touch, his very personality, would leave lasting impressions upon those fortunate enough to frequent his shop and pay for goods they might not otherwise have ever considered.

The door swung closed behind the Almighty and she exerted her Will enough to keep anyone from coming in for the time being. Yes, his selling of books was a good thing, but for the moment she required his full attention and that meant keeping potential patrons away. This wasn't simply a casual visit and there wasn't any more time to waste before having it. So she didn't browse, didn't hesitate, but instead made her way to the back room where she knew Aziraphale would be. Upon spotting him, she simply cleared her throat a bit and smiled.

Aziraphale was aware the instant his Father entered the shop. It wasn't that he saw him or heard him so much as there was a tangible shift in his sense of the world. He was just aware of it. He finished with the books he was organising, knowing that God would make Himself known when He was good and ready and there was no reason to rush Him. When he was finished with the books, he fixed a pot of Darjeeling and poured two cups, adding a hint of lemon to his own and leaving the Lord's plain. At the sound of God clearing His throat, he turned and smiled. "Hello, Father," he said calmly, offering the cup of tea. "Would you like to have a seat?" He gestured over to the sofa and chairs at one side of the room, waiting for God to sit before he did so. He was certain his Father was here for a reason, but that did not mean he would forgo civility and manners. He was, in some ways, more British than Heavenly at times. But that, depending on who you asked, was not necessarily a bad thing.

Once they were seated, he took a sip of his tea and studied the Lord for a moment. This wasn't a social call, he could tell that much just looking at God, but the reason was something he could not even guess at. It was no matter though. They would get to the point of the conversation when the time came. In the meantime, he would just enjoy his Father's presence. "Adam seems to be fairing better," he said. "This was a hard lesson for him, but I think it was one he needed to learn. Actions aren't without consequences, and that's a difficult lesson for someone his age with his abilities to take in, when he can change things, and remove the consequences, at a whim. I've been worried about Castiel, losing people is always unpleasant, and we both remember how...charming I was in Crowley's absence." He gave a small, self-deprecating smile that turned fond as he continued. "But I think he will be the better for it. It will help him grow and become stronger in the long run. Speaking of the serpent, I don't think I've thanked You for Your guidance in his absence, and Your assurances of his return. They made it easier." He was thanking Him, in a circumspect manner, for Crowley's return, but didn't want to outright say that. "He seems to be settling in easily enough, for all that he complains constantly. He and Gabriel are getting along, which is about as disconcerting a prospect as Gabriel and Loki getting along, but it will be good for both of them...I think anyway. At the very least, if Gabriel is distracted, he and Michael won't quarrel so."

He set his tea down on the small table. "But I'm prattling on," he said. "I'm sure you have more important things to talk about."

Both the tea and the time spent simply sitting with Aziraphale were welcome respites from the conversations she had been having with her angels as of late. There wasn't anything he wasn't telling her of course, in regards to the others, but she enjoyed hearing it all nonetheless. His opinions and insight were always a refreshing change from those around her who were so often looking to her for guidance. Not that the Lord minded giving guidance. Of course she didn't. Nor did Aziraphale not require it as well. But with him, unlike with the others, it was different. Each angel had an unique relationship with her. In Aziraphale's case, it was one that required less instruction, less explanation, than with most.

Sipping on her tea, her feet crossed at the ankles and partially tucked beneath her seat, there was a smile upon her lips. You scarcely prattle, Aziraphale, she replied gently. And you are correct, of course. Adam's lesson will serve him well in the future, Gabriel and Michael's quarreling becomes rather tedious so it is good that Gabriel has found other ways to entertain himself. Particularly ones that don't involve teaching lessons to too many of those assembled here. Another sip of the hot liquid, and she gave a soft sigh. Placing the cup down on the same table, she folded her hands into her lap and met his gaze. However yes. There is something we must discuss.

It wasn't going to be easy. Even for the Almighty, this was a difficult task. She loved Aziraphale. He was so very special. Yet she also knew, despite the trouble her words may cause, he needed to know. He deserved that much, at the very least.

The time has come for me to take my leave, the words finally washed over him. My return is not one that is a guarantee but rather dependent upon others here. Her eyes shone as she continued. I cannot say the events to come will be easy. Most will be difficult, at best. However, I also know I needn't explain to you the necessity that they do occur. She paused there, reaching for her tea once more and giving him a moment to take in what she'd said.

Aziraphale listened as God spoke, taking in the words and processing them. He understood, of course, why this was difficult for the Lord, leaving when so many of His children were so reliant upon him. Aziraphale was luckier than most in that he was not so dependent on his Father and was far more independent than most of his brothers. It came from being on Earth, mostly alone and away from Heavenly influence, for six millennia. Well, Crowley was there, but he could hardly be called a Heavenly influence. Quite the opposite, really. More than that though, he has an unshakable faith in God's Ineffable Plan. Whatever might happen, he was sure it had its purpose and that God willed it. His Father did not play games with His children.

"I see," he said calmly. "There are different paths events could take and your return is dependent on people making the correct choices." It made sense. He'd always believed that the Plan was dependent on free will, that it wasn't so much that there was only one way events could turn out but that God saw all possibilities and nudged people to make the choices that took them down the correct path. "And you are leaving because things cannot possibly take the correct path if you are here."

He looked at God and nodded. "Is there anything that you need me to do in your absence?" he asked.

Although God had known the question was coming, hearing it didn't make it any easier to answer. She knew what she had to say. Not too much, not too little. It was a very thin, fine line that had to be walked when it came to things like these. Free will had to reign supreme but, at the same time, certain things needed to transpire for events to not spiral out of control. Fortunately for all involved, however, God knew that Aziraphale was one who would do what was asked without fail or even hesitation.

That didn't make it any easier to say what she needed to say, though. And although it didn't show in her face necessarily, there was a flash of mild sorrow in her eyes as she met his gaze. Yes, she replied, there is. However, I cannot tell you what it is that you must do, Aziraphale. You will know what it is, when the time comes. Vagueness was something that the Lord was quite good at. She'd certainly had enough practice with it. It wasn't, however, something she necessarily enjoyed all the time. It simply was how it was meant to be.

Aziraphale nodded, turning over what his Father had said in his head. It was somewhat troublesome that there was something he had to do that God could not tell him. That indicated that it was an unpleasant task. but he had faith, and no matter his choices his faith had always been unshakable. If there was something the Lord required of him, then there was a reason He was asking it of him and he would do his best to see the task done. Not knowing what was required of him made it a bit more difficult, but he trusted when God said that he would know when the time came. He just hoped that, whatever it was that the Lord required of him, he would be able to serve his Father well.

"I will do my best, Father," he said with a small smile. "And I'll try to keep my brothers from tearing this place apart in Your absence." If only he had known the significance of that statement, and which brothers would be involved. "But enough about serious concerns," he picked up his tea and took a sip. "How is your tea? We should talk, You and I, more often once you return. I know that you have much to occupy your time, but I quite enjoy your company."

Aziraphale's words were so bitterly ironic, even if he wasn't aware of that fact himself. God didn't point it out, either, as it would reveal far too much and, again, was entirely dependent upon the choices others made. So instead she simply smiled, tipped her head, and answered with a soft, I know you'll do your best, Aziraphale. Then she allowed him to change the subject. Was grateful for it, in fact. Although she knew she would not say anything more to him on the matter, at least not directly, she also knew that if he were to wish to talk about it further she would either have to dispel such desires or answer him, and neither was a favorable choice.

Picking up her own tea once more, she held it delicately and took a sip. Her eyes sparkled as she peered at him over the steaming liquid. Yes, she agreed. We really should. There will be things to discuss, of course, but simply visiting is also something I would enjoy very much. Another sip and she added, Also, the tea is wonderful as always, Aziraphale. Her drink was almost gone, and with it the time she had allotted for speaking with him. She glanced down into the tea for a moment, studying the last few sips as though they might contain information that even she was unaware of existing.

Once her gaze flickered back to him, there was a look of sadness that shone for the briefest of moments. Fleeting, scarcely noticeable, and yet very much a glimpse into what she was feeling at the moment. She refused to dwell on it, however, instead finishing her drink and silently setting it back upon the table. I do wish I could stay longer, she stated by way of an apology. However, I've still a few more things to attend to before my departure. It would seem even I have a schedule to maintain at times. There weren't many who could handle such a thought, nor who would realize it was both truthful as well as a mild joke. She had little doubt Aziraphale would recognize it as such, though. He always had been unique in a great many ways with his ability to understand her in a manner that few others did being one of them.

"Thank you," Aziraphale said, pleased by God's faith in him. "I'm glad you enjoy it." She would know what he was actually thanking her for. "When You return, we will do this again and You can tell me about whatever interesting things You encounter in Your absence, if you like." He finished his tea and tilted his head, watching his Father curiously for a moment. Though many would have missed it, most in fact, he had always been observant and he saw that brief glint of sadness in his Father's eyes. He knew that whatever was coming would test his faith and would involve hardships he would not wish to endure, but he would endure them for his Father's sake. Because his Father never asked more than one could give, not really. Reaching over, he gently touched God's hand with his, something most of the other angels would not even consider doing.

"Everything will go as it should," he said, with a quiet certainty. "You needn't worry. I suppose the hardest part must be letting go and trusting that events will follow their proper path, even for You, but I have faith that all will be as it should. It's ineffable, after all." He smiled and got to his feet. "I wish You could stay longer as well, but I would hardly keep You away from Your duties." His smile turned amused at the comment, and he laughed softly. "I will let You go then. Much to do and all, and I'm sure Crowley has got into some mischief while I have been occupied. I should hate to think what he would do if left to his own devices for too long." He held out a hand and helped the Lord to His feet, not because he thought He needed it, but because he was a gentleman as much as he was an angel. "I am glad for Your visit," he said fondly, "and I look forward to seeing You upon your return." Because he didn't doubt that God would return.

There were times, although God would never admit it to anyone save perhaps the Metatron, that she wished she had the same sort of faith in herself that others did. She knew what she was capable of doing, she knew that there were very few who came close to the sort of power she wielded with very little to no effort, and she knew that she deserved worship and praise as the Creator of All. However, even her own ego wasn't so large that she couldn't acknowledge, if only to herself, that there were times she wondered if she'd really made the right decision. The creation of the universe, the decision to build man rather than stick solely with her angels. All of it had been decided upon so very long before, longer than most anyone could even possibly fathom. She had been different, then. Young. Egotistical. Utterly oblivious to the loneliness that came with being who, and what, she was. She had wanted worshippers who could do so of their own volition and not solely because she had created them to do so. And thus came the concept of man. A being with free will, able to accept her or cast her aside for whatever reason. A being she had found, by the time all was said and done, she loved more than she loved anything else she had ever devised. And in an effort to duplicate that same feeling, she had begun to allow her angels a modicum of free will. Not as much as mankind, but enough that they, too, could question certain things. Could form their own opinions. Provided they continued to worship her as they had been created to do, and provided they took no ill stance against man without her say-so, they were free to do whatever they chose within the confines of their purpose for existing.

And thus came those who began to question her plan. Lucifer, of course, was the worst offender by far, but hardly the only one. He'd simply pushed it beyond a tolerable point. Others, however, had wondered what made man so very special. Wondered why they were meant to live a life of servitude while mankind was given free reign over a planet they neither respected nor cared for properly. But not Aziraphale. No matter what had taken place, no matter how convoluted things had appeared, he had always maintained his faith. His belief, not only in her, but in the ineffability of it all. His belief in such was unshakable - Crowley could certainly attest to that fact - and normally filled God with a pride that only a Creator could truly know.

Now, however, it left a rather hollow feeling inside. A twist of bitter irony that, she knew, he would eventually come to appreciate as would she. If, however, and only if, things went the way she was attempting to shape them to go. There was nothing set so permanently in stone that it was a guarantee, really, but tipping the odds in the favour of one outcome over another was something she was extremely adept at doing. That didn't make it easy, though.

Still, it had to be done. And so she kept her comments to herself in regards to the great, ineffable Plan, and simply smiled and allowed him to help her to her feet. She didn't release his hand upon standing though. Instead she gripped it lightly and smiled up at him. I do adore you so, Aziraphale, her voice came out softly, quietly. Stepping closer, she wrapped her arms around him and held him in a tender embrace. After a moment she released him, peering upward to look into his face with a smile that was filled with pure, unfiltered love. Her fingers danced across his cheek before she withdrew fully and her smile turned a bit lighter. And try not to be too hard on Crowley. He really would be lost without you.

Then, with a slight waggle of her fingers and a gentle breeze that softly rustled the pages of his beloved tomes, God disappeared from sight. There was one more matter to attend to and with very little time left to spare.

His Father's words filled him with warmth and calm, and he returned the embrace, not saying anything until she spoke of Crowley. "I do not think I could be hard on him...not really," he assured her. "He really is better than he gives himself credit for. I think, at this point, he would do well enough even without me." Though he hoped it never came to that. He smiled at God and closed his eyes as she left, just taking in that last moment before her presence was gone from his shop. And then he cleaned up the tea cups and got back to work with a smile, his spirits lifted by their conversation.

---

God had spoken to all of her angels with the exception of one. Loki. Her dear, sweet Angel of Death, with whom she had only just begun to interact with once again. She had purposefully saved Loki for last for a number of reasons. Partially because she knew that the conversation with him was one that was going to weigh heavily on him and she didn't want to make that last any longer than necessary, and partially because she knew what she had to say to him was going to be the most simplistic to say. After all, he was the only angel with whom she was being direct about a fair number of things, even if part of what she had to say was going to be as convoluted and vague as she had been with the others.

Locating him was easy, of course. There wasn't anywhere that anyone could truly hide from her and Loki certainly wasn't attempting to hide. Fortunately he was attempting to behave himself by not smiting everyone he came in contact with. Granted he was sitting on a bench in front of a strip mall, watching the people come and go with a look on his face that all but screamed he wanted to slaughter half of them, but he was behaving nonetheless. She had to give him credit for that much.

Smiling lightly as he fidgeted in his seat, God sat down beside him on the bench and cleared her throat lightly. Then she waited for his reaction, knowing he wouldn't disappoint.

He didn't.

Almost instantly Loki stiffened, quickly turned his gaze toward her, and very nearly broke something trying to scramble off the bench and kneel at her feet. He didn't need to breathe and yet he felt his breath catch in his throat, a tremble coursing through his body. Immediately his mind began to fly through everything he'd done as of late, wanting to make absolutely certain that there wasn't anything that could get him into more trouble than he'd gotten himself into the last time he'd been face to face with the Lord. He didn't speak, although he really wanted to, but simply bit his tongue and waited for whatever had brought the Almighty there in the first place.

Loki, God's voice was tinged with amusement, You're causing a scene. Come sit down. You are not in trouble, I promise you.

The words helped and the Angel of Death slowly peered up at her, his expression one of absolute love and adoration. It was happening. Finally, after all of this time, he was getting a chance to speak directly with his Creator once more. He resumed his seat almost as quickly as he'd abandoned it, but found as he opened his mouth that any words he tried to say failed him. Finally he settled for an inquisitive look, curiosity shining brightly in his eyes.

God's smile remained an amused one as she, in what she would freely admit was a bit of goading on her part, remained purposefully silent for a bit longer than was absolutely necessary. Loki had never been particularly good at sitting still and simply waiting for things. He had an impatient streak within him that was rivaled by very few. However, to his credit, he did his best not to ask anything. And finally, when it became apparent that he had reached the end of his limit in patience, she allowed his efforts to be rewarded.

Lucifer is on his way here. Not the incantation that is currently here but rather a version who is far more welcoming of the end of the days, one who is not going to uphold the balance but rather is going to do everything in his power to tip the scales to his benefit.

It was the first time she had spoken of what was coming. With her other angels she had been deliberately vague. However, with Loki, she couldn't afford such a thing. Of course, she still had to word things carefully, and be very specific in some instances, but she also knew out of all of the angels, Loki was the one who could take this news to heart and still continue on as he always had.

Once he got past his initial shock, of course.

"Son of a bi-" Realizing what he was about to say, and who he was about to say it to, Loki stopped and had the grace to flush a bit. "Sorry," he apologized softly. "Habit. But really? Fu-" He paused again, swallowed, started over. "So this is it, then."

God didn't make him wait for an answer this time. She simply replied, Yes and no. The battle is going to be fierce and lives will be lost, but as this is not Earth, it will not equate quite to Armageddon. A brief pause and she added, You also cannot tell anyone that he is to arrive here. I am expressly forbidding you from even so much as alluding to such a thing.

Loki nodded, frowning lightly at the order but wisely keeping his mouth shut. God continued. I have spoken with your other brothers present. They are unaware of what is to come, but know their roles regardless. You, however, are not to concern yourself with their squabbling unless it is absolutely necessary. You are to remain uninvolved until the time comes that your involvement is required, and at that point you are to keep Lucifer from gaining control of his true vessel no matter what the cost. She fell silent, certain he had questions. She was right, of course.

"So... I don't have to kill the Winchester boy? There might be another way to stop Lucifer from getting to him?"

This was where obscurity stepped back into play, a fact made obvious by the lack of finality in the Lord's tone. Perhaps, she replied. It depends upon the actions of others. Should you have no other recourse available, do that which you were meant to do. However, should you find another option to be more favorable, by all means do so. Her tone took on a more gentle sound, her hand grasping his lightly and causing his gaze to shoot up to her in faint surprise.

She smiled. You have made many mistakes, Loki, and you have done your best to correct them. You are repentant. You have changed. Do this, what I ask of you, and all will be forgiven, she assured him quietly.

Loki blinked. He swallowed. Finally, he grinned. "Well, why didn't you say that to start with?" he half-laughed. Quickly he added, "Not that I wasn't going to obey. I may not be as smart as some of my family but I'm not a complete idiot. But... thank you, Father." The last words were spoken with reverence. God continued to smile and squeezed his hand.

You will make me proud, regardless, she murmured. Simply remember the advice you gave Castiel and do that which you were created to do. Without question this time, if you don't mind. The last part was faintly teasing and Loki's grin grew a bit in response.

"Yes, my Lord," he agreed readily. His smile froze, turning into a much more serious look, when God released his hand. She leaned closer, pressing her lips against his cheek, and he felt tears sting his eyes as her love washed over him. It had been so long, too long. Why had he ever listened to Bartleby in the first place? What could possibly be wrong with doing what his Father commanded? Clearly the Almighty's love was unending, even when the orders passed down seemed like anything but.

His thoughts were cut short when God rose to her feet. He made to move, to kneel once more, but she shook her head with a smile. Watch over your brothers, Loki. Gabriel and Michael will need your guidance whether they realize it or not. Castiel, as well, although in a different way. And, should I not return, know that your place will, someday, once again be in Heaven.

Then she was gone. There was a soft breeze that lifted his hair a bit, followed by an emptiness that made his very essence ache. She was no longer there, he realized. Not just gone from his sight, but truly gone from the city itself. And he knew that, unless things went a very specific way, she wouldn't return.

"Well," Loki said softly to himself as he rose to his feet. "This fucking sucks." Then he shrugged and, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans, made his way back toward the apartments before he missed his afternoon cartoons.