Sadie Shepherd (![]() ![]() @ 2009-04-08 23:25:00 |
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Entry tags: | ketty, midian, sadie |
Jujube; Wednesday night; Sadie, Midian, and then Ketty
The Double Z had been closed since the night the Spy Formerly Known as Eli went on the run, which was last Saturday. The natives had been getting antsy, and now that the bar was back in business, Dave was busier than ever. He'd spoken to Sadie before the bar opened for the evening, but he hadn't seen her since she retreated back up to her apartment. He figured it was just as well. Sadie was still in bad shape, so it was better for her to avoid the curious, gossipy patrons for now. Of course, she'd still have to face them at some point.
Ahab came up to the bar and ordered a glass of the Double Z's best whiskey. Dave grabbed the bottle off the shelf and looked down at the counter as he unscrewed the cap. As he lifted the bottle to pour some out, a hush fell over many of the bar-goers in the area. Dave furrowed his brow and looked up. He followed their gaze to see Sadie, who, with her hair slightly mussed, clothes wrinkled, and bags under her eyes, looked like she had just rolled out of bed.
Dave frowned as she wordlessly picked up the counter flap to head behind the bar. She trudged along, glancing at the shelves and then turning to Dave, ignoring the people around them who were staring.
"Hey, what's..." Dave trailed off right away as Sadie reached out and plucked the bottle from his hands with a frown. She looked down at the label and after a moment, turned right back around and walked the way she came.
"What the hell?" Ahab demanded, looking from Sadie to Dave.
Dave shook his head and turned to Ahab. "I can get you the Chicago," he suggested, and so began a long argument between him and the regular.
Sadie, meanwhile, took her bottle and headed straight out the back door. She didn't like being up in her apartment right now, not after everything that happened in it. Despite that, she'd spent much of the past week up there, but now she couldn't take it anymore. She needed a change of scenery. Like the back steps. The air was just warm enough that she could sit out there for a while, especially with some alcohol warming her belly.
She sat down on the second step from the top and stared at the east wall as she took a long gulp straight from the bottle. When she set the bottle down between her legs, she took a quick glance behind her at the door. Thankfully no one had followed her out there. She hadn't wanted to show herself in front of all those people just yet, but she was out of drink upstairs. It was kind of an emergency.
Midian had taken rare visits to the Jujube while it was overly crowded – no doubt full of people waiting to get a glimpse of Sadie – mostly because he’d wanted to check on Sadie and see how she was doing. She’d taken care of him pretty well when he came into the bar despite his drinking downfalls, and he was kind of irritated that everyone seemed to be waiting around for gossip.
When the hush fell over the crowd, he was just finishing his drink at the other end of the bar. He frowned at Sadie’s disheveled appearance but he wasn’t expecting much else. He waited for her to disappear before he followed, empty handed for once. It took him a little while to hobble out the back door but when he got that he sat himself down next to her with great effort and a grunt, stretching his right leg out and down the steps as he looked over at her.
“My liver was jealous of yours after that exit,” He told her, making no mention of asking if she was all right. It was most likely the last thing she needed to be asked since the answer was obvious.
Sadie had lifted up her bottle for another drink when she heard the door behind her open. She lowered the bottle with a frown, intending on shooing whoever it was away. But when she saw it was Midian, she turned back to look at the wall. He was all right. He knew how not to be annoying.
She took another sip from the bottle and only gave him a quick glance once he sat down before she returned her gaze to the big slab of concrete. "It shouldn't be. My liver's getting pretty beat up lately," she said as she lowered the bottle to the step.
Midian had to chuckle at that. “You’re talking to an alcoholic,” What? He wasn’t stupid. He knew he had problems. Whatever. “Hence, liver jealousy.” He said as he watched her drink right from the bottle. He lifted a canvas bag he’d brought with him.
“I was hoping you’d be around tonight so I didn’t have to leave this with Dave.” He held the bag out toward her. It was full of that cheesy bread she liked so much. “Might have to pop it in the microwave to get it warm enough since it’s been sitting a little while.” He confessed, it was only cause he’d been sitting and waiting for her. That’s right, Midian braved a crowded bar for a few hours to try and catch Sadie. That was…something, he was sure.
Sadie still watched the wall and smirked a little at his comments about drinking, but when he held the bag out, she turned to look at it. She furrowed her brow and took the bag. When she opened it up, she blinked down at its contents. Then she looked at Midian, her eyebrows arching up a little in the middle.
"Thank you," she said quietly. The fact that he had gone through all that trouble just to bring her bread was the nicest thing that had happened to her all week. She leaned over, intending to give him a hug, partly out of gratitude and partly because she really needed one.
Midian was a pretty awkward guy when it came to displays of affection of almost any kind. In Sadie’s case, with everything that had happened and what he’d heard from Ketty and from his visit to bring food to Slate’s hospital room, he was willing to make an exception.
So he turned his torso and opened his arms to give her a sufficient hug, both arms around her and even a couple of sways. He decided to wait for her to let go so she could just have however long she needed and he just hoped he wasn’t hugging her too tight or anything crazy. “Anytime,” He told her in response to the ‘thank you’.
Sadie closed her eyes and held onto Midian for a for a few long moments before she finally pulled back. She gave him a little smile and set the bag down on the steps so she could pick up the bottle and offer it to him. The least she could do was share her drink after that.
Midian pressed his lips into a small smile and then accepted the bottle for a drink, a much smaller one than he’d normally take, and then handed it back. “Consider me your personal baker for the time being,” He grinned even though he pretty much was anyway since she shopped at his place. Not the point. “I make a mean…meatless…pot…pie…” He arched an eyebrow and shrugged as he said it. “Or we’ll stick to cheesy bread and…pie or something.” He added with a nod.
Sadie laughed a little and looked down at her legs. "I don't know, the meatless pot pie sounds intriguing. I did always like the crust better than the actually contents of those things, so you could always use more of that instead of the meat."
Midian chuckled. “Consider it done,” He agreed. “…Veggie pot pie.” He nodded. “I can pull it off. Don’t think I can’t,” He smirked at her and leaned over to nudge her shoulder with his own lightly.
"I don't know..." Sadie said with a half-smile. She nudged him back. "I'd have to eat it to believe it."
Midian gave her a little smile at the nudge. “Swing by tomorrow after we close and I’ll even show you how,” He bounced his eyebrows. “Hell, you’ll even get a tour of the back room, whatd’ya say, hmm?” He gave her a little exaggerated wink.
Sadie's smile widened, but not much. "That sounds intriguing," she nodded. She couldn't stay cooped up in the apartment forever, and hanging out and baking would be a nice distraction. "Lucky for you I'm a better baker than my sister." Not much better, but better.
Midian looked Sadie up and down as if sizing up her baking skills. He nodded a little. "I think I can see how you would be..." He teased with a nod. "You'll be making crust pot pies in no time!"
Sadie smiled and let out a quick, wistful sigh. "Just what I always dreamed of."
Then she got quiet. She turned her head down and looked at the bottle before lifting it up again for another prolonged sip.
Midian leaned back, his elbow on one of the steps behind them as he leaned on it. He watched her take the drink and then looked straight ahead. He took a deep breath and let out a sigh. "Guess I'm gonna have to give you some kind of lecture at some point, huh?" He asked. "Maybe not a lecture...some experience filled story full of advice or some cheesy bread shit like that?"
Sadie set the bottle down again. "I dunno," she said, looking back over at the wall. "Do you have experience with having everyone you fall in love with either dying or being enemy spies?" She turned to Midian and squinted. "'Cause that would be helpful."
Midian frowned and looked over at Sadie. He glanced at his knee and then raised his eyes again and lifted his eyebrows. "I know what it's like to be betrayed by someone you love?" He reasoned.
Sadie followed his gaze down to his leg. Oh. Yeah. "You do," she nodded. After glancing back up at him, she grabbed the bottle off the step and handed it over.
Midian accepted the bottle a little more easily this time. He took a bigger drink from it too before he held it back out to her. "So here's the lecture. Shit happens. You're not a bad person. It's not karma. It's not God's vengeance. It's not fate. And you're not cursed. Shit just happens." He shrugged and then looked at her. "You deal with it or you don't, in your own time. So if you need to, tell everyone to back the fuck off and let you deal with it." He nodded. He looked up at her again. "And we need to get you some self defense lessons so you're not just body checking people with guns anymore." He smirked a little. "That'll come after the cooking lessons."
Sadie turned back to look at the wall as she listened. She frowned some as he spoke, but really, it was the best lecture out of the many she'd been given over the past week. When he got to that last bit about the body-checking, she turned her head down to look at her knees. That wasn't a moment in her life she was especially eager to re-live. At least Slate was going to be okay, though.
After a moment, she swallowed and then looked up. "It's good to know that cooking lessons take priority over self-defense," she said with a severely tiny smile.
"Hey, you were trying to protect your sister. It's not your fault," Midian leaned over at bumped her side with his shoulder again. "Anyway, the way I figure it, all the dough kneading, filling mixing and tray carrying will get your arms and legs in shape to handle the self-defense lessons." He forced a smirk for a moment.
She could have let the qualified professionals deal with it, though. But she didn't. Sadie brought her eyes back to the wall again, and then had to laugh a little as Midian continued. "Wow," she said, turning back to look at him. "I never realized baking was so intense." She reached out to take the bottle because she definitely needed another sip.
Midian held his hand up, index finger extended. "Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa now..." He turned his head and looked at her, eyebrows arched. "Baking the Cappadocia way is intense...no other baker in town puts as much...intensity into their baking." He stated with a firm nod, trying not to crack a smirk. "And don't you forget it."
Sadie arched her eyebrows, not even trying to mask her smirk. "That sounds really dirty," she admitted with a shake of her head. "I'm a little worried about what your secret ingredient is now."
Midian bounced his eyebrows. "Well you haven't complained so far, so I guess it's tasted fine thus far," He cracked a little smile over at Sadie. He nodded a little.
Sadie scrunched her face up and laughed, louder than she had before. "Gross," she said before elbowing Midian in the arm.
Midian grinned a little more and shrugged. "You can't just stop a joke train when it's rolling down the tracks, you're derail it," He informed her before holding up his finger again. "You remember that. These are words of wisdom you need to hear, young lady." He smirked.
Sadie smiled and folded her arms so she could lean forward on her knees. "You're teaching me all kinds of life lessons tonight."
Midian smirked and leaned his weight back down on his elbows on the step behind him again. He let out a little sigh and nodded. "Someone's gotta be the teacher, I guess," He smirked a little. He leaned over and gave her a shoulder a head butt. "Listen," He squinted at her a little in thought and then spoke. "People are assholes. We do stupid shit and hurt each other and none of us are innocent. The question, I think, in the end is whether we're redeemable or not." He gave a little nod and then squinted up at the sky for a moment.
Sadie glanced at Midian after the head-butt and her smile faded as he went on. She brought her eyes down to look at the bottom step. "Yeah, well, how do you figure that out?" she asked.
Midian scrunched his face up as the sun came free of a small cloud it had been behind. "Yeah, you're not gonna like that answer," He turned his head to look over at her. "Time. At least so far in my experience. No one ever said life was easy though," He added. "You have two choices really. You can either ruin yourself like me and it'll be too late to change when you want to, or you can learn from the past and just move on. Either way, it's gonna take time," He shrugged and looked at her. "But you're a Shepherd. I think you'll fair better than I did," He decided. "Til then I'll rough up anyone who starts with you while your sister deals with all that other crap," He smirked. "And teach you how to bake. With the secret ingredient." He nodded. "And give your liver a break. It's just going to keep you numb. You shouldn't be that way, force it all down inside. You're an external person. Be angry. Snap at people - write songs about how you feel. That's how it works when you've got creative bones in your body, right?"
Sadie was quiet for a few moments while she considered all that. She didn't want to have to wait. That was entirely unfair. She hadn't done anything wrong and now she had to suffer just because she made the mistake of being happy and loving someone for a while. She could definitely deal with being angry and snapping at people, though.
"I tried writing some songs," she said, turning her head to rest her cheek on her arms. "It didn't work out so well. It was more like figuring out how many times and ways I could say 'I hate you' in three minutes. And not in a good way."
Midian nodded a little. "I'm sure the alcohol didn't help?" He arched his eyebrows a little. He straightened up a little more, feeling a little more awkward that he really couldn't do much to help her out. So he decided to go that extra step or whatever and did something he most certainly wouldn't have done if it were almost anyone else in the whole town. He reached out the arm that was next to her and wrapped it around her shoulders to pull her over and into a little half embrace. The hug earlier, that was a step - a leap even - for Midian Cappadocia. But to initiate a hug of any kind, that was, well, unprecedented or something like that. It was just rare, beyond rare really. But he did it, because she probably needed it and he was trying to help. And because she was right. It wasn't fair that this was the consequence she got for loving someone.
"No, it didn't," Sadie shook her head. She closed her eyes for a moment, but then had to open them back up again when she felt Midian's arm on her shoulders. She knew he wasn't much of a touchy-feely kind of guy so she was a little surprised he was doing it, even after their earlier hug. But she also appreciated it to the nth degree. She leaned into him a bit and let out a quiet sigh.
"Yeah well..." Midian was quiet for a few minutes. He gave her arm a pat with the hand of the arm around her a few times. "Today, we drink," He decided with a nod. "Tomorrow, we bake," He turned his head to look down at her with a small little smile.
Sadie smiled a bit. "Sounds like a good plan," she nodded before sitting up again. She picked up the bottle and took a few gulps before she handed it over.
Midian nodded. "I think you'll find I'm full of 'em sometimes," He said as he accepted the pass and took a few gulps of his own from the bottle.
When he passed the bottle back, Sadie went in for another sip. She set it back down and looked at the wall. "So...what do you think they're going to do with him?"
Midian pressed his lips together and considered if he should be honest or not. He tightened his arm around her briefly and then answered. "Depends on if they let your sister in there or not."
Sadie frowned, knowing what that meant. "I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this," she said after a moment.
"She won't kill him," Midian said confidently. "They want information from him. What was he total mission. What's the WA planning. All that." He paused a moment and looked over at Sadie again. "And I don't think you should think about how you should feel about it. I think you should just feel however you feel about it. You love him. You don't want him hurt because you love him. You despise him for the lies and the deceit and all that crap, sure. But you loved him first. It's all right to feel more than one way about someone." He hoped this was somehow helpful to her since he was really just kind of making it up as he went along. Not that he didn't have experience in the betrayal area.
"Even if that means you love him and hate him?" Sadie closed her eyes and shook her head before leaning her head against her legs. "It shouldn't even matter, anyway. He's not really the guy that I love." He said he was, though, but Sadie didn't think she should believe that.
Midian tilted his head a little from side to side slowly and shrugged up his shoulders. "That's one way to look at it sure," He nodded. He turned his head up again to look at the sky. The clouds were picking up a little but it wasn't cooling off yet. "I love and hate my brother immensely." He added. "For separate reasons completely." He nodded, but kept his opinions on the rest of it quiet. She needed to work through things on her own, right? He was just putting his opinion and own feelings out there.
Sadie didn't understand how you could still love someone that beat the shit out of you made you into a cripple for the rest of your life, brother or no. She couldn't even imagine she and her sister in the same situation because it was just so difficult to fathom. But Midian lived it, so it was possible. She frowned and handed him the bottle again.
"Do you forgive him?" she asked, looking at the wall again.
Midian took the bottle and looked down at it. He took a drink and then looked at the bottle again, then his knee. After a moment he nodded. "Yeah," He said before he looked at her. "Don't think I'll ever forget it." Not like he could. "But he's my brother. There're a lot of factors that went into why he did the things he did." And Midian had gone through his fair share of those circumstances too, from his own father. "I understand why he snapped. I think helps with the forgiveness." He said, "That combined with the fact that he's my brother, I love him. Love's a crazy thing." He nodded and took another drink before he passed it back. He looked up at Sadie. "Do you think he was only acting?"
Love certainly was crazy, and maybe Midian was too. But in a good way. She took the bottle back and drank down quite a bit before she set the bottle on the step. "I don't know," she said, her voice tight. "When he came in...he told me he was turning himself in and that we were probably gonna, y'know, kill him, and then he told me that he loved me." She frowned a lot, looking like she might start crying at any second, as she turned to Midian. "Why would he say that?"
She wished he'd only been acting. That would make everything a lot easier. More cut and dry.
Midian frowned. He'd witnessed one of the numerous occasions when Sadie and Eli...or Gabriel, whatever...were together and the way the guy had looked at her. Midian didn't think anyone could act quite that well. "I don't know why he would say that." He leaned a little more against her and moved his arm tighter around her. "Maybe he does. He might be a spy...but that doesn't mean he's not human and subject to all the normal human emotions." Probably not something Sadie wanted to hear.
Definitely not. Sadie leaned over against Midian again. She was quiet for a bit because she needed to focus on not crying. Finally, she said, "I wish this wasn't so complicated." Life kind of sucked that way.
Midian nodded. "Don't we all?" He asked before he started swaying a tiny bit from side to side since she was leaning on him and all. It wasn't really something he thought about doing. It just happened. "If you want to...like cry or anything, it's okay y'know." He told her after a few moments. "I'm not gonna go blabbing to people that you were or anything." He didn't think he needed to tell her this since he was a pretty quiet antisocial guy in the first place but maybe she needed to know before she let herself get all weepy or something.
Sadie turned her head down and let out a quiet chuckle or two. "I know you won't," she said before looking up at him with a small smile. The swaying was comforting and Sadie appreciated that too. She was glad Midian had been able to catch her before she retreated back up to her apartment again.
"Good," Midian nodded a couple of times. "Maybe you can write a song about my baking. You can allude to the secret ingredient, but never give it away." He decided a moment later with a nod. He deciding fluctuating between deep and silly was an okay combo for now.
"Well, I did promise you that I'd write a song about you and flour and yeast," she smiled some more. "I tried, but it hadn't been working out so well. Maybe the secret ingredient allusion was what I needed."
Midian chuckled. "Now you're all set. Then you'll be luring me in to large crowded Sadie Shepherd shows in no time." He smirked.
"Well, you did brave the crowd tonight," Sadie pointed out.
Midian shrugged a little. "There are some things more important than your own silly fears," He answered without much hesitation.
Sadie smiled. "Thanks." She closed her eyes and let out a long sigh. "I'm sorry I brushed you off the other day."
Midian shook his head and ran his hand up and down her arm a little. "You're going through some harsh shit right now. I didn't take it personal." he assured.
"Phew," Sadie said, looking up at him. A moment later, the door behind them opened. Sadie turned to look at it. Ketty and Young were there, both in uniform and obviously on duty.
"Sadie," Ketty said, glancing at Midian, "I'm sorry about this, but we're going to have to ask you to close the bar tonight."
Sadie frowned. "Why?"
Midian arched his eyebrows as well as he looked at them. "What's going on?" he asked as he gave them a nod in greeting.
"Roberts wasn't the arsonist," Ketty explained quickly to Sadie. "There's another WA inside the walls, sent in to clean up Roberts' mess. And there's a good chance you're his number one target. We need to shut down the bar and bring you to the base. It's safer there. Dad and mom are being taken there too." She nodded toward the bar's door. "Nyx is already clearing out your patrons." Ketty let out a short sigh. "I'm sorry, Sadie. We're going to take care of all of this as fast as we can."
Sadie squeezed her eyes shut tight with a tired sigh. When was this going to end?
Midian frowned. He looked from Ketty over to Sadie. "Do you want me to go with you?" he asked.
Sadie opened her eyes and nodded. Hey, if he was going to offer...
"All right," Ketty nodded, looking at both of them. "You should go upstairs and get some of your things, but hurry."
Sadie picked up the bag of cheesy bread and pulled herself to her feet. She wasn't entirely steady once she was up. "What about the building? What if he gets it?"
"We've got guards coming over to keep watch."
"The same guards that kept watch last week?" Sadie arched her eyebrows.
Ketty cleared her throat and glanced at Young. "Better ones," she promised. "And we're on alert, so any chance there's a fire and we'll have it taken out right away."
Midian glanced at Ketty as he moved to pull himself to his feet with some effort. "Why don't you go up with her while she gets her things?" he asked, so they could talk by themselves and also so she could guard Sadie, if Sadie was a priority target.
"I'm on it," Ketty assured him with a nod. She looked at Sadie. "C'mon."
Sadie cradled the bread in her arms and reached down to scoop up the bottle on the stairs. She followed Ketty into the bar with a frown. Dave and Nyx were in the middle of ushering people out. They didn't seem very happy, either.
Midian watched Sadie and Ketty go and then went to help Dave and Nyx with the bar stuff. He went and grabbed an extra bottle of what Sadie had already been drinking so she could bring it with her to the base. And then he sat on a stool and talked to Dave and Nyx while they waited.
Sadie and Ketty were upstairs for about ten minutes. When they came back down, Sadie was carrying a duffel bag and a guitar case. It was the guitar she'd gone to get on the attacked supply run. Over the past week Sadie'd had many an urge to hurl it off the top of the building. But it was the only acoustic guitar she had, so she needed it. When they got to the bottom of the stairs, Sadie glanced up at her apartment door for a moment. Then followed Ketty over to the others. Dave had already gone around to shut off and close up everything that needed to be shut off and closed up.
"Okay, we're ready to move out," Ketty announced. She lifted up her radio and sent out a message alerting some other soldiers.
Midian pulled himself to his feet and grabbed the bottle he'd picked out by the neck. He moved his free arm around Sadie's shoulders. "After a few drinks when we get there, maybe you can start working on my song," He said quietly just so Sadie could hear. "I promise to pretend I'm not listening so it's a surprise when you premiere it." he nodded.
Sadie looked up at him and smiled a bit. It sounded like a good plan. "Thanks for coming along," she said as Ketty opened the bar's front door. Once everything was clear, she ushered everyone out.
Dave went to the door to lock up and Sadie stayed back to chat with him briefly about what the plan was while the bar was closed. When they were done, she walked back over to the group.
Once Sadie was ready, Midian opened the door to the truck Ketty and Young had brought and then climbed in after her. It'd be safer than walking and would take less time. Once they were in, Cappa lifted his arm and moved it around Sadie's shoulders again. Now that more was happening to Sadie to make her life even harder he felt pretty protective. He couldn't really help it.
Sadie appreciated it. Once she put her stuff on the floor of the truck, she leaned against Midian's side and looked out the window at the bar. There was a possibility she might not see it again. She wasn't sure she could handle that after losing Eli in the same week. She frowned some as the truck pulled away.