Actually, Hell with it, I'm the one with something up. I've got news for all of you, so gather round, children and let Father Mac talk to you, seriously, about the shit that's gone down in this community lately.
Everybody comfortable? Super. Let's begin. We'll start with a couple alleluias and everybody standing up, looking at the cross and thinking about the guy whose up there and the fact that he decided he was going to give himself up because we're a bunch of shitty sinners. Okay? Everybody done that?
Thanks kids, now, let's get real so we can talk about the uh. Gay Issues floating around here, and how God probably feels about it all, okay?
A Reading From The Gospel According To Mac:
It's looking like there's been a fuck of a lot of confusion about what happens if you're a gay, or a guy who likes to fuck other guys, or girl who fucks other girls, or any of the combos involved that aren't exactly tab a into slot b insertions. But the thing is, there's nothing WRONG with being into any of that, or being a trann...uh being trans, or trans* with the little star.
God made all of us and while he made some of us assholes and actually evil? Nobody's evil because of who they're getting in between the sheets with, and nobody should have to die or feel like they're doing anything God doesn't want because of it.
We wouldn't be the way we are if God didn't want it, right? We wouldn't be able to care about, and you know, love people if He didn't have it in his mind for it to be that way. God wouldn't send around people who love us who we love too, if we're not supposed to love them back. I mean...Fuck. God's big thing, his CHRISTMAS thing why he sent his SON to get tortured for our sake after having to roam around the desert forever...it's because he LOVES us too. Because he wants us to be HAPPY. If somebody's happy with another guy or girl, or whatever... then we should just mind our business and let them do it.
And if ANYBODY'S got a problem about where people are sticking their dicks, or fingers or their dildoes, cucumbers or tongues? It had better be the people actually having the sex and the people that they have it with, and it'd be better be because they're figuring out what works.
NOBODY deserves to fuckin die or feel like they should die because of who they love. Anybody who makes anybody feel that way's the world's biggest asshole who I want to punch in the face because not only are they going against people's rights and humanity, but they're going against God too. Because he said we're supposed to love each other too. Only some of you are doing a fucked up job of showing THAT.
And if you're being harassed or picked on or threatened or beat up or anything at all because you're a non hetero? You don't have to take it, the people doing and saying it are wrong and you have every right to punch them in the face. Or I'll come by and punch them in the face for you. And if you ever need to stay somewhere that's safe, I'll DEFINITELY hook you up. It's all too short to deal with assholes, right?
Let's all just treat each other like we're fucking humans and hate each other for the reasons that we really SHOULD hate each other instead, you know?