Adam stopped at the door, resting his forehead against it. He'd heard that too. Been yelled at or watched others get yelled at then asked to stay behind. "I pissed you off," he explained. "I didn't mean to. I don't want to do that. I'm sorry."
Kyle shook his head. "I shouldn't have snapped. I just - I want you to be able to have a life that's independent. Of me, of him. You don't have to tie yourself to people as if you don't have other options. And I don't see why you can't still go to college. Okay, maybe you're not going to be able to get into the best schools, but there are others out there. You could open up your horizons some. Do some exploring, find out what you like. Who you are - underneath it all."
"Except I don't feel like I do Ky. I don't have...people. No friends that aren't his or you. I don't even know if I could do college. What if I suck at it?" Adam had made decent grades in school, well enough to get in somewhere despite it not really being an option. He didn't have parents that could pay for it and when he turned eighteen he would be out of the system and on his own. It was partially why he wasn't worried when he'd slacked off senior year with Jeffrey. "I'm not much of anything. Just a lonely kid."
"So what if you suck at college?" Kyle countered. "I'm living proof that if it doesn't work, you can quit. It didn't work for me - but I'm not sorry that I tried. Right now, maybe you're just a lonely kid - but that's not all you have to be, Adam!"
"You didn't suck. And you're going back. Even if I have to drag you there myself, you're going back. You're stupid talented and you deserve to get better," Adam insisted, sounding more sure about that than he did about anything concerning himself. "I don't know what to be Kyle. Or who to be. I don't even know where to start. I didn't even think I liked guys until a few days ago and obviously that's wrong."
"What's wrong? That you like guys, or that you didn't know about it until a few days ago? Because neither's actually wrong. I didn't know that I loved working as a blacksmith until a couple of days ago. That I actually kinda loved just making horseshoes. If you'd have asked me, I would have said that it would be boring, because it's same-y and repetitive and there's no room for any kind of flare, but I... really enjoyed it. That's the great thing about trying out new stuff. Sometimes, sure, you'll find things that you don't like, or that you downright hate, but sometimes you'll find things that you enjoy, or that you're actually pretty good at. But you don't know what that'll be until you try. So - start by applying for college. Go on the first day. Sign up for random classes that you think are interesting. See what sticks. That seems to be what at least half the people I went to school with did anyhow."
"That I didn't know! I feel like that's something huge about myself that I should know isn't it?" Adam sighed and leaned his head back against the door. "I don't think it's that easy Ky. I don't even know how I'm going to pay for it." The idea wasn't a bad one, but in a way it scared Adam. It meant putting himself out there and that sounded like a recipe for rejection.
Kyle couldn't leave him over there, all alone like that. Not now, not with this. He crossed the room without hesitation, gathering Adam up in his arms and dealing with the easy part first. "I'll pay for college," he promised. "Wherever you want to go. Don't worry about the money. I've got that." That just left the freak out over not realising he liked boys. Harder, much harder. It wasn't something Kyle could relate to that much - he'd always known. "So, you like guys. I... What can I do? Do you... want do you need?" he asked, trying and failing to know the right way to react to this.