I'll Rip Your Throat Out
Who: Bianca and Edison, then Harlow Where: The encampment When Morning
Bianca was pissed. This was the second day in a row she’d woken up in a strange place. She sat up on her bed of straw and looked over to see a man on the other side of the cramped space. Thank the gods she was fully clothed. She looked down at herself and her eyes nearly bugged out of her head. What the fuck were these clothes? Was she traveling back in time every damned night? What would tomorrow be? A pterodactyl nest? Also? Where the hell was that crazy bitch who had made her think she was in a horror movie? If she was around somewhere, Bianca didn’t know what she was going to do but it wasn’t going to be pretty.
She stared hard at the sleeping man. Whoever he was, he was a stranger and he didn’t belong sleeping so close to her. She slapped his arm. “Hey! Hey, get out of here!” she demanded.
Edison had been sleeping soundly, used to sleeping in uncomfortable settings so the straw mat was nothing. Or he had been sleeping soundly until someone smacked him and he jolted awake, reaching to stop whatever hit him. "What? What? Why are you hitting me?" He stared at her, confused, then looking at his own clothes. This was weird. Really weird. "Why are we in a tent?"
Bianca might have smacked him again but he'd reached out to stop her so she got to her feet instead. Looking down at him and choosing not to answer his first questions, opting to move on to the tent business. "Because the universe hates me," she grumbled though she was taken a little aback at his strikingly exotic looks. "I don't know but the better question, I think is, why are we in a tent together?"
Edison stayed where he was, looking up at her. She was one of those gorgeous ones, looking fantastic even though she was wearing some weird looking dress and her hair was a mess from sleeping. He didn’t let that show though, since those type of women didn’t usually give him the time of day. “No idea. Because I fell asleep in a hotel that I woke up in after falling asleep in a library. I’m trying to figure out why I’m dreaming this.” Kennedy would find this hilarious wouldn’t she? Or curious at least.
"I woke up in that hotel too. Yesterday. But I at least had my own clothes. There has to be some kind of law against changing people's clothes while they're sleeping. Someone I don't even know saw me naked!" she said angrily. She pointed a finger at him and narrowed her eyes. "It had better not have been you. Because believe me, if I find out it was, your world as you know it will end. Who are you, anyway?" she asked, her tone losing its anger momentarily. "This is no dream, buster. This is pretty fucking real. Just take a minute and smell the air." It was making her nose hairs curl, the smell of whatever. Dampness or mustiness or animals or something. Mold maybe? She didn't know. She'd paid good money never to have to smell anything remotely similar to this.
“It wasn’t me,” Edison said holding his hands up in innocence before sitting up more, elbows propped up behind him. “I would remember that.” And he didn’t remember much else beyond going to bed. He took her advice and sniffed, nodding a little. “That’s definitely pretty damn real,” he said before really getting up, dressed in just a too loose white shirt and leggings. “Where are we?”
Bianca arched a brow. "You'd better have," she said though it wasn't exactly logical to know that she'd be mad if he didn't remember her body even though she would be even more mad at him for having done the whole clothes swapping thing himself. She watched him get up warily though his outfit was a little distracting. She sputtered quietly and then clamped her mouth shut, turning to see where the door of the tent was. "A tiny tent in the middle of Stink Central. I can't even tell if I smell." She lifted her forearm to her nose and sniffed, wrinkling her nose. She found the tent flap and peeked outside. "Oh, for fuck's sake. Toto, I think we're actually in Kansas."
He raised an eyebrow at that look, that noise, though he had no idea what that meant at all. Shaking his hair out of his eyes he joined her at the doorway of the tent. “Too many mountains for Kansas.” There was something weird in general.
Bianca glanced over at Edison when he came to stand beside her. She half rolled her eyes. "I don't know, I've never been," she deadpanned. "It doesn't even look like America really. It's like something out of Doctor Who. The tenth one when they still went to different planets instead of always traveling around Earth." She shot him a look that said he better not look at her cross-eyed for knowing Doctor Who. "I had to keep up with the competing shows. It was in my contract."
He did give her a look for the Doctor Who comment, but then frowned more. “What show?” Was that why he was dreaming about her? He’d seen her on tv? That would make sense really. You were only supposed to dream about people you’d seen even if just on tv or in passing.
Bianca tried to look mad at him when he gave her that look but he was kind of pretty and it was hard to do. The result was a narrow-eyed half smile that she quickly turned back to the landscape outside the tent. She told him the name of the show and said, "I was Princess Jezebel from the planet Clock for a million seasons." She wrinkled her nose at the smell outside and felt so frustrated that she wanted to stomp her foot, only she would end up stomping on his if she did. And she wasn't mad at him enough to need to do that just now.
He considered that, then grinned, nodding. “I remember. Different hair,” he said. “Awesome.” Totally dreaming. Without a doubt he was dreaming. She couldn’t be real.
Bianca looked over sharply at him to see if he was having her on or something. He seemed genuine and internally she thought, "About damn time someone recognized me." Outwardly she smiled slightly and nodded. "Yeah bleaching it for the blue hair destroyed it. Thank the gods it's healthy again. No way. You really watched the show?"
“I did,” Edison told her with a nod. “Kind of a nerd.” Which he didn’t sound upset about. Looking around a little he went back into the tent to find something to wear over what he had on now. “I say we look around yeah?”
Bianca followed him back into the tent and sighed. It would be so nice if the fans of the show weren't nerds. But she'd taken what she could get to get out of Idaho. There was no changing that. "Well you really don't look like a nerd. Maybe a little girly in the tights but... yeah we should look around and figure out stuff. Don't you dare leave me."
“Girly, thanks.” Edison smiled, but at the same time that wasn’t what any guy wanted to hear or be called. “I wouldn’t leave you. Not when we don’t know where we are.” Even if that wasn’t the nicest thing to say to someone he wasn’t going to abandon her.
Bianca looked briefly apologetic. "It's partly your own fault. You're kind of pretty to look at," she said and then pursed her lips and looked toward the door. He was kind of all sorts of nice things in that getup with the loose shirt and the tight fitting bottoms. But she wasn't admitting that. Nope. She'd been rejected twice now. Adding a third to that list was not happening. For all she knew this was hell and it was a hell where no one, except the nerds, recognized her and every guy wanted nothing to do with her. Yeah, she'd say that was definitely her idea of hell. "Thank you," she said when he promised he wouldn't leave her because his reasons weren't important. Just that he didn't leave her alone in this weird place.
“Yeah but girly?” Edison said, but his tone said not go too far with it. It was more just pointing out that it wasn’t exactly flattering. Looking around he found a tunic and a bag that seemed to have his things in it and threw them both on. “Ready?”
Bianca sighed and thrust out a hip, rolling her eyes though she still couldn’t not smile somewhat at him. “Fine, no. Not girly. My go-to when I’m nervous or unhappy is insult. It’s a bad habit, I’m sorry. I don’t want you running off and leaving me because you’re aware of how much of a bitch I am.” It was probably most self-deprecating and honest speech she’d given in a long time. Her look said yes, she was indeed a bitch even if he thought of protesting. She was at least that self-aware. “As ready as I’ll ever be to go a-skippin’ and a-jumpin’ through the weird,” she replied and squared her shoulders.
Edison was impressed by the speech and it showed on his face. People weren’t usually that aware of themselves. He nodded then patted her shoulder. “Lucky for you, I don’t run off on people because they’re bitchy.” He found her bag and handed it to her.
Harlow had woken up in a tent all alone, surrounded by niceties she hadn't had before in a place that she hadn't ever seen before. After a moment of seething about being uprooted again, she realized there was a set of shiny black armor near her and it looked impeccable. There was an wicked hydra etched into it and she grinned at the sight of it as she ran her fingers over it. After a few moments of awkwardness, she had the armor on and was strutting out of her tent with obvious pride.
Bianca took her bag from him and gave him an appreciative smile both for the bag and the fact he wasn't running off. She'd attempt to keep herself in check which was already working because she hadn't snapped at him for touching her. She really did not want to be alone here. She looked out the tent flap again and then looked over her shoulder at Edison. "There's someone else out there now. In armor." It looked to Bianca that there was the same weird animal thing on the armor as was on her dress too.
Edison was following after Bianca when he spotted the other man...no not man...at least he didn’t think there with the same logo on her, his, chest. “Hey!” he called out, starting towards the knight. “Do you know where we are?”
Harlow looked up at the call, watching them both for a moment before stepping forward. She scrutinized their clothes, seeing the matching hydra on their tunics. Maybe they belonged to her? "No, but apparently you two work for me," She said, pointing at her hydra than their own. "Who are you?"
Bianca frowned slightly. "I don't work for anyone at the moment, honey. But I'm Bianca and this is…" She let her voice trail off as she tossed a thumb in Edison's direction, suddenly realizing he'd never answered her when she'd asked who he was and she'd been far too distracted by the situation they were in to notice it before.
Edison looked at his shirt then Harlow and shrugged. “The knight’s right actually,” he told Bianca. “Edison,” he filled in for her, smiling a little. “And you are?”
Harlow very seriously eyed the girl, cocking an eyebrow at her impetuous comment. She liked the boy, considering he’d agreed with her and her way was always right. “Don’t ever call me fucking honey again, or I will rip your neck in half this way,” She said, motioning with her own hand in a vertical line from chin to the hollow of her throat. Looking back at Edison, she tilted her head a little. “Harlow. Or Supreme Master to that one,” She said, hooking her thumb over at Bianca.
Bianca raised a brow and was so ready to beat a bitch until she realized that was probably a truth the woman had delivered. She looked over at Edison and edged toward him. "Fine, I won't call you honey," she said but her chin was raised slightly. She wouldn't call her Supreme Master either. She didn't have to do anything she didn’t want to, right? But she really didn't want to end up lost somewhere so she looped her arm with Edison's. "Sorry," she whispered to him.
He looked at Bianca and Harlow thinking that yes, the woman would do that. Without a doubt. “Harlow it is. Do you know where we are? We’re not from here.” He hoped she could help. That would be a good start.
Satisfied, for now, that Bianca also understood the pecking order, Harlow turned her attention from the girl to Edison. "I'm not from here either," She answered, though she was pleased that he seemed to think she might be. She would have made an incredible knight. "I woke up here from my room at a hotel, but I prefer it here. Closer to nature." Looking back at Bianca, Harlow studied here. "Where are you two from then?"
Bianca thought briefly of telling Harlow that she was from the planet Clock but thought better of it, deciding to respond with a clipped answer. "Idaho, USA, Planet Earth," she said simply and glanced over at Edison to hear his answer. In her mind she was grumbling and thinking of the things she'd like to say but wouldn't dare risk her neck over.
“Idaho?” Edison asked Bianca, surprised. She didn’t seem like Idaho. “Rhode Island, but same as you, started off in a hotel just last night. Didn’t mean to wind up there either.” He tilted his head a little. “You seem rather at ease in armor.”
So at least the smart one started off in a hotel too. That made Harlow a little happier, knowing that someone else had been able to get out of the hotel. Maybe it meant they could stay out of the hotel? "I am not from America," She said in Bianca's direction, the thickness of her German accent becoming more prominent. Turning back to Edison, she beamed a grin at him. "I was meant for this. Just born years and years too late. But I'm assuming you two belong to me now so…you two should find out when I get to fight." She'd seen some people sparring together earlier and wanted to be doing that, or something close to it, as soon as possible. "Or perhaps you'll find the girl a sword and we can duel," She told Edison.
"I've lived in Canada for the majority of my adulthood," she told Edison. "But yeah…" She stopped and her arm tightened around Edison's as Harlow insinuated she belonged to her. She didn't belong to anyone but she sure as hell didn't want her throat ripped out. She gritted her teeth and stomped her foot inconspicuously. As soon as she was away from this bitch…. Bianca lifted her face and narrowed her eyes at the suggestion she wield a sword for a duel. "Right. You're going to kill the hired help. Soooo sporting."
Edison was sure this was a situation that needed to be diffused, but he wound up nodding a little. “Sure thing. We can figure that out. And you’re right, you do look the part. Same with the German. I was guessing as much from your accent.” He felt Bianca squeeze his arm and stamp her foot. “How about Bianca and I got find out about your fighting and then we’ll come back and let you know when they’re expecting you?” It seemed best to get Bianca away from Harlow just to avoid any issues.
Harlow was amused, watching the girl puff and pout. It was funny, really, and she smirked because of it. But then Edison spoke with his good ideas again and she nodded. “Yes, you do that. Take her and bring me back good news.” She started toward a small hay bale then turned back and looked dead at Bianca. “Good news is that I will fight soon, just so you know.”
Bianca gave Harlow a sarcastic look, the most she dared at this point. "Fight away then." To the death, bitch. She looked at Edison and loosened her grip on his arm because danger seemed less likely now and she wasn't one to appear weak if she could help it. She kept her voice low as she said, "Whatever magic you possess just got my ass out of trouble. Thank you."
“I assumed as much,” Edison told Harlow with a smile then started walking himself and Bianca in the opposite direction. “Patience and diplomacy. I’m the middle child. It’s essentially been my job since I was born. Come on, let’s find out her information and put some space between you two.
Bianca let go of his arm altogether then, knowing she was safe from the throat-ripping psycho. What the hell was with all of this anyway? Why were there so many nutjob women in this nightmare? She really was in purgatory. Bitch purgatory. She gave Edison a sort of relieved look. “Space between us sounds like a good idea. I wish she’d thought of that herself,” she grumbled. “What do we do to find out her info?”
“She doesn’t seem like the type to back down,” Edison said with a shrug. Which made the woman impressive, but abrasive. “I suppose we head towards the flags and banners and see if we can find the center of this thing. There should be information somewhere.”
“No kidding,” Bianca said and made a face. “Who tells someone they’re going to rip her throat out? Who does that? She’s nuts. I don’t think we should do anything for her. We should get the hell out of dodge.” She folded her arms across her chest almost protectively because, while she’d said that with a snarky tone, she didn’t feel at all safe where Harlow was concerned.
“Maybe just me goes back,” Edison suggested. “Might be best anyway, but I also don’t think it’s best to not give her a reason to come after us. So we’ll find out the information and I’ll go talk to her and you can stay here.”
Bianca gave a look as though he'd grown four new heads. "You really think she'd come find us if we didn't come back? What makes you think she wouldn't come after me if only you go back?" She looked around like Harlow might appear out of nowhere and rip her throat out.
“Because she’d be getting what she wanted,” Edison said. He also wasn’t so sure how much of Harlow’s threats she’d follow through on, but he was pretty sure she was dangerous enough to go tromping around looking for the two people bearing her coat of arm on their clothes. As he pushed them forward into the clearing he’d had his eyes on, everything clicked into place. “It’s a tournament…”
Bianca opened her mouth to respond with something snippy and rude about what Harlow really wanted when they came out into the clearing. “A tournament for what?” she asked, eyeing everything around her as though it was from another planet. Which probably should have put her at ease, past role as an alien princess and all considered, but it only served to make her feel like she ought to hang onto Edison. She didn’t though because she refused to be a big baby here in front of so many people. “And what is that smell?” she asked, putting the back of her hand to her nose.
“Knights,” Edison said, but he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking at everything else. He found board with all the standings and tournament information. “Looks like there’s a proper joust.” He turned back at her then sniffed the air. “The dark ages as a whole. Alright I need to go find Harlow. You find somewhere safe to hang out.”
Bianca shook her head. “Didn’t they used to do all sorts of horrible things to pretty women left alone? How do I know where is safe?” she asked, trying to sound annoyed but she was a little scared about this. Especially with all the big animals running around and then men with seriously large and obviously dangerous swords. Someone was being dragged away bleeding and unable to walk on his own!
Edison made a face. “They’re knights, not Vikings. Plus you’re dressed like a squire and for all they know the reason why a knight would have a female squire would be because he’d want her for himself.” He looked around though, hearing that she sounded scared and not wanting to leave her feeling scared even if she was a tiny bit of a bitch. “Come on, we’ll head back to the tents and you can avoid Harlow.”
Bianca gave him a dead look when he made a face and then gave her that condescending answer. It riled her up to the point where she was feeling more angry than scared. “You know what? You go back and talk to the Harlow the Ripper. Have fun with that.” She started to stomp away, already pulling at the livery she wore with the idea of finding somewhere she could dump it and change into something a lot less conspicuous. There had to be other women around her somewhere, right?
Edison considered going after her, not sure if he should. He actively debated it for a moment before following after her. “You sure?” he asked. “You can stick with me if you want. I don’t mind.”
She would have liked to have stayed with Edison but now she was just insulted. She'd take care of herself. That's what she did best. Who else would do it for her? She shot him an icy glare and kept walking. "Just leave me alone. I don't need your pity help."
“I wasn’t being pitying,” he said, not quite following after her this time. He got a few more steps, but not that far. She didn’t seem to want to be around him.
Bianca was the girl who wouldn't let it go unless you weren't around to argue it so she kept up. "Yeah, whatever. I saw that look you gave me. You think I'm an idiot for not like being super cool with being here. Like I should know all that stuff about knights and claiming with clothes or whatever. But I don't," she said and turned toward him briefly. Then she kept moving. "So whatever. I'm an idiot. Who gives a shit. Just let me do it by myself without your whatever." She waved a hand over her shoulder at him, indicating whatever it was - his savvy, his knowledge. She didn’t want him to go but she sure as hell couldn’t eat enough crow to admit it.
Edison went through what he’d said trying to determine where she’d gotten that from. Had he done that? He didn’t remember that. He remembered telling her about knights and comparing them to vikings, but he hadn’t meant to talk down to her. “I wasn’t…” He started but she was waving him off and that felt patronizing, which had Edison sticking to where he was. He should go after her, he knew that. But he wasn’t sure he was ready to put up with her. “I never said or thought you should know about those sort of things. I wouldn’t ever expect that. But go if you want.” There, he’d given her a reason to come back at the very least.
It wouldn’t have mattered how he’d sounded, that he had sounded like he was teaching her anything made her feel like she’d gotten schooled. Her brain was trained to think everyone was condescending because that was how she behaved sometimes even when she didn’t appear to be. Especially if she knew more than the person she was talking to. And at this point it was a matter of admitting she was wrong, something she was loathe to do so she kept going in spite of herself. She couldn’t go with him now for anything. “I hope you don’t get your throat ripped out,” she said, the only truthful thing she could allow herself to say in the moment.