People always get the wrong impression how it was between us that time when he came back.
Yes. He was the one that asked for a second chance. That's true.
But what only he and I will ever know is how from that moment on, he called all the shots.
Feeling his lips again ... if it had been left up to me I would have hurt both of us, and trashed the office in my need to just get closer. I couldn't think beyond... Eyes.
That's what people don't see.
21. by LJ's lastglances
This is a moment to live in, to forget any past or future they had or might have had together. This is the time to lay himself bare, to grow and reach and strive for what he wants. They embrace, kiss, and fumble. They part and it seems to be the end. Brian sleeps, smokes, works. He tries to imagine a time before Justin when he might have been happy, when he might have been who he was meant to be. But such only bring him more sadness. "It's only time," he said. He meant to say, "It's only everything."
Despite what people thought, Brian knew just how screwed up he was. He also knew the reason for it. The years guarding his heart and soul in the Kinney household had erected seemingly solid walls to hide behind. But the hair line cracks needed constant seeing to.
His pain management was easy to recognize, and he kept it no secret. Sex. Lots of it. Drugs. Equal amount.
Most people didn't even bother to name it as the pathetic band-aid it was.
But the things he did to keep things as firmly together as he was, was something he did alone.