westernredcedar (westernredcedar) wrote in pervy_werewolf, @ 2008-05-30 06:51:00 |
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Entry tags: | #lmom 2008, author: westernredcedar, kink: kissing, remus/severus, remus/sirius |
LMoM: 1979 (Part 30~ December 31, 1979)
Title: 1979
Today’s Date: December 31, 1979
Rating: PG-13
Word count: ~950
Pairing: Remus/Severus, Remus/Sirius, some Order member cameos
Kink(s): Only kissing.
Challenge: Lusty Month of May 2008
Summary: 1979: One of the worst years of Remus's life. Also, one of the best.
Today’s Episode: Remus decided that going to the Order’s New Year’s Party would be easier than explaining why he wasn’t going.
Notes: The possibly insane blpaintchart has agreed to speed beta and Brit pick for as long as she can stand it while I try this…so generous is my Chart!! Anything remotely clever is probably her doing…:) Oh no! Chart is off on a trip for the last two days, so today and tomorrow will be unbetaed until her return. If you see any glaring issues, please let me know. Also, thank you to McKay for running this crazy thing.
Need to catch up? Here are the previous parts: Jan 1, Jan 15: Day, Jan 15: Night, Feb 2, Feb 9, Feb 20, Mar 10, Mar 24, Mar 25, Mar 25: Later, Mar 26, Mar 31, Apr 1, Apr 11, Apr 12, Apr 14, Apr 24, May 5, May 6, Jun 1, Jun 2, Jun 30, Jul 20, Jul 20: Later, Jul 22, Aug 27, Aug 27: Later, Oct 31, Dec 11
Remus sat in the corner in a deep, plush armchair, visible only because of the plumes of smoke he was exhaling as he nervously chain smoked, hoping that by sinking into the chair far enough he would be almost invisible.
He had decided that going to the Order’s New Year’s Party would be easier than explaining why he wasn’t going. Besides, the atmosphere between him and Severus had been chilly and difficult since Remus had seen the mark on his arm. Severus had been back home in his room that night after Remus returned from The King and Bishop, reading, as if nothing unusual had happened. Remus was startled and guilty and drunk, and so the moment had passed for Remus to ask Severus more about where he had gone, and after that it seemed too late. Days passed, and they never spoke of it again, and the mark on Severus's arm remained dull and dim. Remus knew they had been trying to smooth things over in their own ways these last weeks, but it was obvious they both could use a break. Severus had muttered about needing to tend to something on New Year’s Eve, and Remus had nodded without comment. The invitation from Elphias was tucked in his pocket, unanswered. He would go.
Remus was dreading the party, but he also wanted to go. Fuck, he missed Sirius every day, missed his ability to make Remus feel like he was a someone, like he mattered. He missed listening to his rambling, perverted stories while being strategically touched for emphasis. He missed those eyelashes. Sometimes, when he was on his regular stroll to the jobcentre, he’d imagine James was walking with him, kicking a rock down the pavement, talking shit about Quidditch, and making him laugh. He’d even considered the appeal of a long night of chess with Peter, eating too many crisps and arguing about the most recent episode of Gods and Heroes on the wireless.
Really, he wanted to see them all three years ago. But it wasn’t three years ago.
Remus arrived at the party late, when it was already noisy and crowded and he could sneak in without saying hello to anyone. He was stopped for an awkward, stilted conversation with Caradoc and Benjy by the bedroom where they were all throwing their cloaks. Then Elphias interrupted and shook his hand and welcomed him, offering him a drink, which Remus declined. He’d been off booze since The King and Bishop.
He scanned the room for his friends, but none of them were there.
For a New Year’s celebration, it was a rather subdued affair. So many deaths over the past months meant the party was populated by ghosts, all imagined, but as present as The Grey Lady or Nearly Headless Nick ever were at school. Remus watched them invisibly linger around their people, listening in on conversations. He was aware of Gideon standing at his side, eyeing his fag with longing and elbowing him every time a girl walked by.
When Sirius arrived, a rack of ale in his arms, accompanied by James and Lily, he met Remus’s gaze almost immediately. Remus knew him well enough to see him hesitate for the smallest of moments before he smiled, put down the beer, and walked directly towards him.
Remus wondered if he would ever see Sirius walking through a party and manage to not imagine him naked and hard and fisting himself. Remus smiled until he remembered he was going to have to speak to Sirius in moments, and that he had no idea where to even begin. He ran his fingers over the tiny scar Severus had left on his shoulder when he had bitten him.
Remus let out a long breath, suddenly sure he needed to find a way to make it up with Sirius. He missed him too damn much.
He was steeling himself up for a dramatic scene, but Sirius just plopped down on the arm of the chair and ruffled a hand through Remus’s hair, saying, “If you are attempting to be a mysterious, elusive creature of twisted loyalties, you’d do better to stay away from the holiday parties, you tosser.”
Fucking Sirius.
Remus almost burst into relieved laughter, but he hid it with a sly smirk. “Excellent point. I’ll have to work on that. Thanks, professor,” Remus replied.
Sirius wrapped one arm around Remus’s head, his hand resting over Remus’s forehead, holding him in an awkward grip, and leaned close, his lips brushing over Remus’s ear. “Listen, Moony, I want to try, but I don’t understand it, and I don’t think I can ever hear one word about that…about him. All right?”
Remus nodded. “Yeah. That’s all right.”
Sirius shifted his odd grip on Remus's head and kissed him. It wasn't a passionate kiss, or a possessive kiss, just familiar and deep. It felt like forgiveness. Remus brought his hands up to Sirius's cheeks and let the kiss linger, hoping the soft pressure of lips and the gentle tangle of tongues was somehow the cure.
Sirius let him free and met his eyes for a long moment. “You wanker. Snivellus fucking Snape…bloody unbelievable.”
Remus pressed his lips together and didn’t say a word.
As the moment passed, Remus glanced around the room. No one seemed to have noticed them.
“So...how are you?” he asked.
Sirius smiled and reclined backwards on the arm of the chair, as if he was planning to stay for a while. He grabbed Remus’s fag and took a long drag. “Oh brilliant. War, you know. What could be better? Violence, pain, missing brothers, dead bastard fathers…what’s not to like, Moony? How are you?”
Maybe, Remus thought, just maybe, they could make this work.