HP fic: Better the Instruction (7/22) [Remus/Teddy, Teddy/Andrew, adult]
Title: Better the Instruction (7/22) Authors: celandineb and emiime Fandom: HP Chapter pairings: Remus/Teddy, Teddy/Andrew (OC). Chapter rating: NC17 Chapter length: ~9500 words Warnings: Rimming, incest, nipple play, blowjobs. Summary: Remus makes a decision that Teddy isn't happy with, and Teddy has a date. Note: AU (Remus survived the war). See here for complete story header with all pairings/warnings. Also here.
Chapter 7
Teddy had carefully clutched his magazine all the way back home--not home anymore, he reminded himself, but his father's house. He wasn't sure if he wanted to show it to Remus or not. Maybe later, after their lesson.
He was definitely looking forward to that, although, as he'd admitted to his father, he wasn't sure he'd really mastered the cleaning charms. He had practised them some, but it was difficult to tell on oneself if they were working properly. So even though he'd also tried them on various other things besides his arse, such as his rather dusty bookcase and the gunge behind the wardrobe, he suspected he didn't quite have the hang of it.
Remus peeled off his coat and hung it up. Teddy did the same.
"Ready?" Remus asked, and Teddy nodded enthusiastically, following him upstairs.
"I suppose I might as well show you your gifts first," said Remus as he sat down on the bed. "Come here."
Teddy sat next to his father, and Remus put one arm around him.
"You seemed particularly interested in penetration, Ted, so I thought these would be good for you to have." He pulled out three plugs in different sizes, just as he'd said he was going to buy. They were smooth and white and had wide bases, then a narrow bit, then widened again and tapered down to the tip. Not only the widths were different, but the lengths too, the largest looking about the size of Teddy's own cock.
Teddy's eyes widened. "Oh, wow." He'd known, of course, what his father had been buying for him, but the reality of those belonging to him was seriously intense. For once, he wasn't going to mind going home at the end of the lesson, not if he could play with those when he got there.
He reached for the package, taking out his wand. "Can I open it?"
Remus nodded. "Of course. Take them out, feel them. Tell me what you think." Teddy sliced open the plastic of the package with a spell and stowed his wand back in his pocket, then took out the smallest of the plugs. He held the base in his hand and ran his fingers over its length, then formed a circle with his index finger and thumb and pushed the plug through it.
"Oh," he breathed as it popped through the circle. "Yes." He turned his face up to his father's and was instantly hit with a wave of desire, wanting badly to kiss Remus's gentle mouth. He stopped himself, however, sensing that he would do better to wait.
"Thanks, Dad," he said, and he pressed his face to the warm wool of Remus's jumper, inhaling. "These are brilliant," he added, his voice muffled.
"You'll be wanting this, too," Remus said, and he nudged something towards Teddy--a bottle of lubricant. Teddy nodded mutely and took it.
"It's absolutely essential that you use lubricant, and plenty of it, for any kind of anal penetration," said Remus, as Teddy stared at the bottle in his hand. "That includes both when you're playing by yourself, and when you're with a partner." Had Teddy imagined it, or had his father's voice quaked very slightly on that last word?
"I will," he promised, and he raised his head to look at his father once again. "Dad, seriously--thanks for taking me to that shop, and for buying me all this--I just--" Teddy didn't know exactly how to thank his father for everything he'd done so far, as well as everything they were still going to do. He loved Remus so much. He flashed back to the moment on the bus when he'd taken his father's hand and Remus had actually squeezed back. He'd grown stiff in his pants when that happened, but he wouldn't tell his father. The squeeze had been enough.
"I just--thank you--" he continued, and Remus hugged him.
"I know," he said, "I understand. It's all right." Remus took a visible deep breath. "But I do want to remind you, once again--and I'm not trying to accuse you of anything--that I'm only teaching you. Okay? If you go out with friends to a pub or somewhere, and it happens that you get together with someone, that's good. That's why I'm teaching you, so that you have the confidence and abilities you need to be with someone and not be worried about it, and not get yourself into a situation you can't handle. So I'm not asking if you shagged anyone last night, or even just snogged someone--it's not my business, unless you want to tell me--but I'm saying that if you did, I'm happy for you."
Teddy felt his face heat up. He had actually done some snogging, and in fact groping, with the reserve Chaser, Andrew, and it had been satisfying enough that Andrew had asked to make sure he had Teddy's surname right, so that he could send an owl sometime. Had he been as obvious as all that? "Okay, Dad," he said. "I understand."
"As long as we're both on the same page about this, then that's fine." Remus kissed Teddy's cheek. "Did you have any questions about the plugs, before we get on to the lesson? We'll be doing toys next time, so you should bring them back here then, but take them home and try them out meanwhile."
"I guess I should start with the smallest one and kind of work my way up, right?"
"That's the idea. As I said, lots of lubricant, especially as you try the larger ones." Remus's cheeks were pink. "Not all men like plugs, but I do, so I suppose it's not unlikely you will. If you don't once you try them, however, there's nothing wrong with that either. Or if you prefer small plugs."
"Do you like the large ones?" Teddy blurted out.
"Yes... especially at certain times." Remus seemed to hesitate. "Here, I'll show you one that I bought for me."
He pulled it out of the bag and handed it to Teddy. This plug was black, not white, and considerably larger than even the largest of Teddy's set. Teddy imagined Remus's arse stretching to accommodate it, and his cock twitched at the thought. If his father liked something so big, though, would he be fulfilled by being fucked by a regular bloke's prick? Teddy was hoping that in the final lesson he'd get to top as well as bottom, but he'd be embarrassed if he wasn't able to satisfy Remus. He swallowed hard, running his fingers along the firm surface. "Wow."
"It's just a toy, remember. The real thing is nearly always preferable." Remus smiled as he took the plug back and put it away, and Teddy felt a little better. Remus stroked Teddy's fringe back from his forehead.
"Just a toy," Teddy repeated, "yeah. I understand." He was torn, remembering Andrew's mouth and hands from the night before in a dark corner in Bacchus, and simultaneously breathing in the impossible wonderment of his father, wool and sweat and love, so close and so accessible.
"So," Teddy continued, clearing his throat, "We're starting on bits of the real thing today, yeah?" He had long been awaiting this lesson--from the first time he'd seen Remus's tongue buried in Sam's arse, honestly, before the lessons had even been dreamed up--and they'd done so much already that day that Teddy might not have been surprised to hear the lesson wouldn't be happening, despite Remus's promises.
"Has nothing yet been real to you?" Remus asked, his voice suddenly cold, his hand no longer moving along Teddy's hairline. Teddy flushed. Dammit. Yes, he'd fucked up now, all right.
"No--Dad--that's--I didn't mean that," he stammered. "I meant what you were talking about before. You know--penetration. Of a sort." He felt his cheeks go a bit pink.
He felt Remus relax a little. "I know," he said, "you've been anticipating this, Ted, haven't you?" Remus's hand began moving again.
Teddy nodded, his head moving under his father's hand. He'd learned by now, of course, that there was far more to sex than he had ever imagined, but penetration still loomed large in his mind, and he craved it. His father's tongue would soon be inside his arse, if he played everything correctly, and Teddy's cock twitched in his pants at the thought.
"Dad? Are--can we start the lesson now?"
Teddy could have sworn Remus let out a little sigh. "Of course. Let's get undressed."
Teddy skinned out of his clothes rapidly. His cock was already hard, both from remembering last night and from looking forward to the lesson, and he gave it a quick fondle as he pulled his pants off. Remus had only taken his shoes off and unbuttoned his shirt by the time Teddy was naked.
"There's no rush," Remus reminded him, and Teddy nodded, trying to control his impatience. He sat cross-legged on the bed and watched as Remus finished undressing. His father's body was a little soft around the waist, and the grey hairs and scars showed his age and the effects of his lycanthropy, but Teddy thought he was pretty amazingly sexy nevertheless. He could see why Sam was interested--Teddy felt the same way, even though he knew he shouldn't.
Remus's prick was still flaccid, worrying Teddy that his father didn't want to do this, even though he'd said they would. He stood up again just as Remus was finishing, and went to put his arms around him, running his hands along Remus's back and arse and pressing kisses along his shoulder. Remus hugged Teddy back.
"What's all this?"
"To thank you," muttered Teddy against Remus's neck. "I'm really glad you're doing this for me. I know you're not entirely happy about it."
His chin was taken in Remus's fingers and he was made to look up. "Ted. If I were entirely reluctant, I wouldn't have agreed at all. But you're right, I'm not completely sure if it's the right thing to do, or if I'm teaching you in the best way; and sometimes it's hard for me to remember that you're young and it's mostly new to you, and that I shouldn't expect too much all at once."
Teddy gave Remus a slightly wobbly smile. "Okay." He tilted his head to brush his lips against Remus's, and then Remus's tongue was licking against the seam of his mouth, coaxing it to open, and Remus was walking him backward to the bed and laying him down on it. Heat pooled in Teddy's belly as he felt Remus growing hard against his thigh as they kissed, and he gave himself up to the pleasure of the moment without thinking about what they would do next.
When Remus moved to Teddy's throat, Teddy blinked his eyes open again and touched Remus's hair, stroking it, playing with the short hairs at the nape of his neck and feeling pleased, when Remus made a little sound in the back of his throat, that he'd remembered his father was especially sensitive there.
"Oh, Ted. I could let you do that all day," Remus said after a moment, lifting his head and smiling at Teddy, "but perhaps we should get on with the lesson."
Teddy nodded. "That is absolutely fine with me, Dad." He laughed, a little embarrassed at the eagerness in his voice, and Remus grinned indulgently, scraping his fingernails across one of Teddy's nipples, causing Teddy to shiver and moan.
"All right," Remus said, giving the nipple a final tweak, "Rimming." Teddy's cock twitched. Ohfuckyes.
"You may find, Ted, that this isn't something you enjoy--and, as always, that's perfectly all right. But many men--myself included--enjoy it very much, and it can be a wonderfully intimate sharing experience with your partner."
"Okay," Teddy replied, sincerely doubting that he wouldn't enjoy it. After all, he loved touching his own arsehole with a finger while he wanked, and had found out that slipping a finger inside was still more enjoyable; wouldn't another's tongue--his father's tongue, oh god--be a hundred times better?
"Why don't you roll over onto your stomach," Remus proposed. "We'll start with some massage--just a bit of touching and kissing at first. I'll warn you before I'm going to start, ah, doing what we're learning today." How funny that his father had put it that way when he'd said rimming in such a factual tone only moments ago.
Teddy complied with Remus's request, rolling over and pillowing his head on his arms. Immediately he found something he didn't like--up until now, he'd been able to see his father during all their lessons, to watch his body and his face as they touched, as they kissed, as they came.
"Dad?"
"Yes, Ted?" Remus had begun to run his hands over Teddy's skin, long strokes down his back. Teddy shivered as Remus's hands moved lower, cupping his arsecheeks, raising gooseflesh all over. He shivered again and let out a soft moan as Remus's thumb slipped between his arsecheeks, barely skimming over his hole.
"Um... never mind." Maybe this would be okay after all. After all, even if he were on his back, he still wouldn't be able to see Remus, down between his legs, oh god, licking him.
"Are you sure?" Remus waited a moment, but when Teddy only murmured assent, he went on, "All right, then. You were practising cleaning charms this past week. I want you to cast one on yourself now. Do you need your wand, or have you mastered it as a wandless spell?"
"I probably need my wand," Teddy was compelled to admit. He had practised some, but his wandless spells were less reliable, and he really didn't want to not be clean for his father.
"Hang on, then. In your pocket?" Teddy felt the mattress shift as Remus got up to fetch Teddy's wand. "Old Mad-eye--he died before you were born, but I know I've mentioned him--used to throw fits if he found out someone kept his wand in his pocket, but I've never had trouble doing it. Here you go."
Remus handed the smooth length of cherry wood to Teddy. He ran his thumb along it, then took a good grip and aimed it at his arse. "Ablue," he said, careful to pronounce all three syllables correctly. Once he'd slurred it in his hurry; he wasn't sure what he'd said, but the result had been a painful constriction of his arsehole until he'd managed to counter it with a finite incantatem.
This time he felt the cool tingle of a successful charm, though. Remus took the wand, setting it aside on the table, and said, "Good job. You'll get another chance later, if you want it."
Fuck, that sounded like he was going to be allowed to try rimming Remus. If he wanted. He thought he did... but then he stopped thinking very much again, because Remus had resumed kneading Teddy's back, this time trailing wet kisses behind each place that his fingers touched. It all made him very turned on, yet relaxed, so that when Remus paused with his hands splayed over Teddy's cheeks to ask if Teddy was ready, there was no question in Teddy's mind but that he was.
Remus's tongue started at the top of Teddy's crack, wet and warm and moving gradually downward as his fingers continued their gentle massage of Teddy's arse, spreading it wide. Even knowing that his charm had been successful, Teddy tensed a little as Remus came closer to his arsehole, worried that he might pass gas and embarrass himself. When he first felt the flicker of Remus's tongue over the tightness, though, he forgot to worry. It felt like when he'd fingered himself, only better, hotter, more intimate.
He heard himself whimper against the pillow and he spread his legs further open. Remus chuckled softly against him, and the vibration made Teddy quiver and whimper again. And then Remus spread Teddy's cheeks even wider with his hands, and his tongue pressed against Teddy's hole, hot and hard and insistent. He licked wide stripes up and down, and Teddy felt himself relaxing even further under Remus's ministrations, even as his cock, pressed against the bed, grew harder and began to leak precome.
"Fuck," Teddy spat as Remus tongued a spiral around his arsehole, zeroing in on its very centre. He pushed his arse up, needing to be closer to his father's face and talented tongue, even though it meant there would be no friction against his cock.
Remus stopped for a moment. "Good," he murmured, and he nudged at the backs of Teddy's knees, helping him into a kneeling position with his head and his arms still on the bed. Teddy's cock and balls swung freely as Remus once again spread his arsecheeks and tongued the tight pucker between them, and Teddy began to whimper again--it was all his overloaded brain would let him do.
He squirmed as Remus began to work at his hole with the very tip of his pointed tongue. Fuck, fuck, he was going inside. Teddy thought for the briefest of moments about calling a halt to the whole lesson--the sudden intense reality of what they were doing bloomed in his belly, and he gritted his teeth. He should say something--he should squirm away--
"Dad," Teddy yelped as Remus's tongue breached him. All thoughts of stopping the lesson vanished as Remus's tongue wriggled inside Teddy's hole.
Teddy thought he might collapse. It felt unlike anything he'd even imagined--and he'd imagined plenty in the weeks leading up to this much-anticipated lesson.
"Don't stop, please, please don't stop," Teddy heard himself begging. His head thrashed about and he clenched hard at the pillow with both hands. He knew that if he touched himself, he'd come instantly, and he didn't want this to end so soon.
Remus moaned an unintelligible response around his arsehole and Teddy thrust back against his tongue, babbling. He couldn't bear it--it was too much--and then Remus sucked and Teddy saw stars as he came harder than he thought he'd ever come in his life. He could feel Remus's tongue still inside his hole as it contracted, and then Remus was pulling away, lapping tenderly over the fragile flesh, his hands caressing, soothing Teddy down from his high.
"Sh, sh. You're fine, that was just fine."
Teddy let himself be turned over, then he sat up, reaching blindly for Remus, who held him close.
"God--Dad--that was incredible," Teddy whispered. He couldn't imagine how anything could be better, really. He'd dreamed of being fucked, but this? Was amazing.
Remus nuzzled at his cheek. Teddy turned his head to kiss him properly on the mouth, only recalling as their lips met where his father's had just been; but then, that was what the charm had been for, and all he really tasted was saliva and a little muskiness, not bad at all.
His stomach was splattered with come and there were damp spots beneath him on the sheet, but he didn't mind. It was enough to feel his heart slowing, the odd sensation in his arse, the way that Remus quivered a little against him.
"I gather you enjoyed that." Remus's murmur held a laugh. Teddy chuckled in return.
"Just a bit, yeah. Wow. You're really good at that--not that I have anyone to compare you to, but still. Wow," he repeated, snuggling into Remus's chest and smelling the scent of his father's sweat. He slid one hand along Remus's side and thigh, reaching for his hard prick. "I know I'm not going to be anything like that good, but, um, could I try?"
Although he'd been slightly ambivalent about the prospect before, now that he'd experienced rimming, Teddy suddenly was determined to do his best to learn how to do it well. He knew it would probably take practise, but there was no time to start like the present, right? And he wanted to make his father enjoy it as much as Remus had done for Teddy.
"Are you sure?" Remus asked, as he always seemed to. Teddy rather liked that Remus was so careful to make sure they didn't do anything Teddy was uncomfortable with, even though he trusted Remus not to do anything or ask Teddy to do anything that he wouldn't find pleasurable.
"Absolutely," said Teddy, and he kissed Remus's mouth again.
"All right." Remus stroked sticky strands of fringe from Teddy's forehead, then turned over. "You'll want your wand."
Teddy nodded and scrambled for it, then moved to kneel between his father's thighs. He took a deep breath and let it out again, running his thumb over his wand handle, trembling.
Remus put his head upon his folded arms after casting a backwards glance at Teddy. "Go ahead, son."
Teddy nodded, then pushed Remus's arsecheeks apart with one hand, aiming his wand with the other.
At first he couldn't speak the spell; his mouth was too dry. The last thing he wanted was to hurt his father by performing the spell incorrectly. But he coughed and licked his lips and took another deep breath, then aimed again.
"Okay. Ablue."
There was a pause, and then Remus sighed.
"Very good, Ted. I'm ready when you are."
Teddy didn't need a second invitation. He cast his wand aside and bent to kiss his father's back, right at the base of his spine. He licked a wide, flat stripe over the skin there, then moved downwards over the ridges and valleys of Remus's tailbone, kissing and licking along the way as Remus shivered underneath him.
When he reached the crack of Remus's arse, he paused, giving his father the same consideration he'd been given.
"Dad? Are you ready?"
"Yes, I am," said Remus. "Go on."
Teddy took a deep breath and put his hands on either side of Remus's arse, pulling it open so that he could see. Tentatively he touched his tongue to the top of the crease, then moved downward. He worried a bit that his charm might not have worked properly, despite Remus's assurance, but when he felt the pucker of Remus's arsehole under his tongue it tasted pretty much the same as the other skin he'd been licking.
Remus murmured something indistinguishable as Teddy lapped at him.
Another breath, and Teddy shifted to a more comfortable position. Then, nervously, he pushed the tip of his tongue against the tiny hole, amazed at the feel of it gradually giving way to his pressure.
"That's lovely." Remus's voice was hoarse. "You're doing a splendid job--although you could relax the death grip."
With a nervous laugh, Teddy realised that he was digging his fingers into his father's arse hard enough to leave marks. "Sorry," he mumbled, and then licked again, wriggling his tongue a little further inside this time.
"Ahh, yes," Remus sighed. He was holding very still under Teddy's mouth. Teddy figured that the noises meant he was still doing fine, even if Remus wasn't moving. Maybe he was worried that it would be too much for Teddy if he pushed back against him the way Teddy had done when Remus was rimming him.
The channel of Remus's arse was soft, almost spongy, against his tongue as he licked experimentally, and the muscle at the entrance flexed. Entranced, Teddy kept on, his heart pounding at the thought that he was actually inside his father, maybe not with his cock, but this was almost more intimate than that, wasn't it? For a moment he paused, overwhelmed with the sheer intensity of it, and Remus said softly, "You don't have to keep on if you're ready to stop."
Teddy pulled away long enough to say, "No, I want to--" before plunging his tongue back inside. Remus was trembling under him, and now Teddy could feel Remus rocking, just a tiny bit, wordlessly urging Teddy to go deeper if he was willing.
He was. I'm sticking my tongue in my father's arse, his mind babbled at him. I'm fucking him with my tongue. Teddy was growing hard again, and he thanked his lucky stars that he was eighteen and virile enough to keep getting hard like this, even after such an incredible orgasm.
He took one of his hands away from his father's arse to coax his own prick back to full hardness, and continued spearing into Remus's channel with his tongue even as he wanked himself, circling his fingers around his stiffened cock.
Remus was moving a little more as Teddy continued his ministrations, making little sounds as if he were trying to stifle whimpers.
He's going to come, flashed across Teddy's brain like a Muggle neon sign. My Dad's going to come while I have my tongue in his arse. He wanted to beg his father to touch himself, to raise his arse in the air as Teddy had done, to please, please come because there was nothing in the world Teddy wanted more at that moment--but he didn't want to leave his father's arsehole, couldn't possibly have taken his probing tongue away in order to speak.
Teddy felt Remus shift, lifting up on one side, and wondered if Remus was touching himself, if Teddy had done well enough that Remus wanted to touch himself. Remus hadn't stopped him, so Teddy thought he must be doing something right. He left off fisting his cock and spread Remus's cheeks wide again, going at his mission with renewed vigour as Remus jerked his own cock--for yes, that was almost certainly what he was doing.
Remus began to pant, and he cried out, and a moment later, as Teddy speared his tongue particularly deep into his father's arse, Remus gave a great shuddering moan. He's coming, oh god, from my tongue.
Teddy withdrew his tongue, giving a great suckling kiss as Remus had done, and brought one hand down to his own cock, quickly jerking himself to completion, his come spattering onto the duvet and a little landing on Remus's left thigh.
Remus rolled onto his back, clearly making a great effort to get back into teaching mode.
"That same cleansing charm," he said, his voice shaking, "can also be used to clean up afterward. Here, get your wand, Ted, and I'll show you."
Teddy shook his head and lay on top of his father so that his belly rested across Remus's sticky one, and their legs were intertwined. "Not yet," he said, and if Remus minded this deliberate bit of disobedience, he said nothing, just gazed into Teddy's eyes, his chest rising and falling hard with each breath.
"I love you, Dad." It was barely even a whisper, and as soon as he'd said it, he remembered the last time he'd said those words, and Remus's protestations. But Remus said nothing, still catching his breath. He closed his eyes for a moment, and Teddy wondered if he were going to be reprimanded. But still his father said nothing, though Teddy felt reprimanded anyway.
To staunch the flow of shame that was quickly filling him, Teddy kissed Remus, then, and Remus made a noise that could almost have been a sound of protest, but he kissed Teddy back.
"I suppose we can conclude like father, like son," Remus said eventually. He stroked Teddy's hair as Teddy's head rested on his chest. "In that particular way, at least. But Teddy..." he broke off.
"What?" Teddy asked apprehensively, his mind coming up with all sorts of things that Remus might be wanting to say, most of which were not reassuring at all.
"Teddy, I'm going to treat you like an adult, and be honest. It makes me very uncomfortable to think that you might be saying 'I love you' not just to me as your dad, but to me as, well, a lover. Which we both know I'm not, and can't be--and I don't want to be. You're my son and I love you as my son, and if I'm to tell you the truth I have to admit that you're a very attractive young man, as well, and if you weren't my son I might think seriously about pursuing something with you--but you are, and Sam's the person I want to be with in that sort of relationship. I'm finding it difficult myself to be as neutral about these lessons as I'd hoped, so I don't blame you if you're having the same problem, not at all. Do you understand me?"
"I understand." Teddy gulped. It was flattering to know that his father thought he was attractive, maybe even sexy, but it also hurt to hear Remus say flat out that he preferred Sam. Not that it was a surprise, or anything, but still painful. "I'm sorry."
He felt Remus sigh. "I know you're doing your best. But maybe both our best isn't enough."
"You're not saying you won't keep teaching me?" Panic rose up in Teddy's chest. "Please, please Dad. I really want to learn what you put down for the last two lessons."
"I'm not sure what the right thing to do is," Remus said. "Growing up doesn't necessarily make a person wise."
"Please," Teddy begged. "I haven't let anyone else know. If I get hurt it's my own fault."
"But you see, Teddy, I'll blame myself if you do, because I could have said no." Remus sighed again, but his hand moved softly over Teddy's head, his thumb stroking the rim of Teddy's ear.
Teddy suddenly didn't want his father touching him anymore--he ached inside, the sort of ache that felt as if it would be there forever. He sat up and moved to the edge of the bed. He hung his head and drew a deep breath to steady himself, hoping that his father would sit beside him, put an arm about his shoulders, comfort him with spoken reassurances and with kisses.
But Remus didn't. Teddy heard the rustle of the duvet as Remus moved, but there was no warm presence by his side, no comforting arm encircling him.
He heard Remus sigh, then there was the sound of more fabric moving--Remus was getting dressed, and Teddy felt foolish and young sitting there naked on the edge of the bed, his spent prick lying soft against his thigh, his belly sticky with his father's come. But he didn't move.
"Teddy." His father was kneeling in front of him, and he took both of Teddy's hands in his own. "Ted. Perhaps we should take a break from these lessons. I fear we're both losing sight of why we began them."
Teddy's stomach began to churn. No! He wanted to shout at his father, to stand up and protest, to force him to continue the lessons. Remus had promised!
He took a shuddering breath. "Dad, please--"
"No, Ted. Don't beg." Remus squeezed his hands. "I want very much to continue with the lessons, perhaps just as much as you do--perhaps more. And we will. But a break is in order." He stood and let go of Teddy's hands, then sat beside him on the bed. But still there was no arm about his shoulders--no contact at all. Teddy shivered from the chill.
He knew his father was right. There was no way they could have a relationship--neither in Wizarding society nor in Muggle. And besides, it was clear that his father was in love with Sam. And Teddy really liked Sam. He did. But still his heart ached and his stomach clenched and his fingers flexed as if to hold on to the skeleton of the love affair that he knew could never be.
"Okay, Dad," he whispered, wrapping his arms around himself. "Sure. We can take a break." It pained him to say the words. He stood and began dressing, every piece of clothing a barrier between him and his father.
"Thank you." Remus's voice broke a little, and Teddy glanced sideways through his eyelashes at his father. Remus looked as unhappy as Teddy felt, but he also looked resolute, and Teddy knew that he wouldn't change his mind.
"When--" When can we start the lessons again, he wanted to ask, but instead he said, "I guess I'll hear from you."
"Of course you will. Maybe you'd like to do something with Sam along again. And it's Christmas next month."
That was true, although just now Teddy couldn't feel very enthusiastic even about Christmas. "Yeah." He pulled on his trainers, not bothering to do up the laces, and moved towards the door. "I should probably go now."
"Don't forget your plugs." Remus nodded toward the carrier bag still sitting there.
Teddy picked it up, resisting the urge to hurl the contents at Remus for making him wait indefinitely before he'd teach Teddy again. Not that plugs were that complicated to use, he supposed, but if he tried them on his own, he was sure that he'd think of Remus every time, imagining his father's face as he came. "I'll see you, then."
He trudged down the stairs, too hurt and angry to risk Apparating; in this mood he'd probably lose concentration and splinch himself. Instead he decided to walk. Maybe he'd take a Muggle bus if he got tired.
By the time Teddy was back to his own flat, it was dark and cold and had started to rain, all of which suited him perfectly. He forwent going to get takeaway and instead heated a tin of beans to put on toast, and recklessly drank most of a bottle of wine that he'd had around in the fridge for ages. It was white, which he didn't much like, but tonight he didn't care. Nor did he worry about the headache he'd probably have in the morning.
"How could he do that?" Teddy demanded of his reflection in the mirror as he cleaned his teeth. His hair was a drab brown, and he scowled and defiantly changed it to bright magenta. "He promised."
But Dad didn't say the break was forever, his conscience reminded him. Just for a while. He said he probably wanted to finish the lessons more than you did... and he said that if you weren't his son, he'd be attracted to you. So that means he is attracted to you, right? And there are good reasons not to be involved with your own father, you know that.
Yes, he knew that, but it didn't mean he liked it. Teddy stuck out his tongue at the mirror and went to bed.
In the morning, he woke with the headache he'd expected, damning himself for not worrying about it or taking any precautionary measures. He wasn't immediately sure what day it was. Did he have to work this morning?
He threw a hand over his eyes and forced himself to concentrate. Okay. It was Monday. He wasn't scheduled to work until the afternoon. Good--otherwise he might have been tempted to send an owl excusing himself.
He dragged himself out of bed, and rubbed the gunk from the corners of his eyes, then made his way to the bathroom, where he brushed the fuzz from his mouth and splashed a little cold water on his face. His hair was still flaming pink, and he decided he liked it that way, angry and spiteful and a contrast to the day that promised to be as grey as the day before. He wouldn't change it until he had to, for work.
There was little to eat in the house, but Teddy rummaged around until he found the remnants of the Chinese takeaway that he'd ordered--when? Friday? Maybe Thursday. Hmm. He sniffed it, shrugged, and found a fork in the drawer, not caring to take the time to heat up the chicken and rice as he stood there in his little kitchen in his pyjamas and bare feet. He hadn't even bothered to put on a dressing gown when he'd got up, which he almost regretted as the chill of the November morning surrounded him while he ate the cold food.
Teddy was determined that nothing was going to cheer him up. He shovelled the last of his makeshift breakfast in his mouth and tossed the container in the rubbish bin, then dropped the fork in the sink where it clanged against the chipped porcelain, causing a similar ringing sensation inside his head.
"Buggering fuck," Teddy said aloud to no one in particular. He knew he'd feel better if he'd take a little Pepper-Up and go out and find some proper breakfast, but he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to feel better.
He collapsed on the sofa, throwing his arm over his forehead and staring up at the ceiling, letting his thoughts drift. What a stupid bloody night it had been last night. And the day had started off so brilliantly, with the trip to London and the gifts Remus had bought for him. Teddy scowled. Maybe he should go into his bedroom and wank over the fit Muggles in the magazine he'd bought--but no. Maybe later. He didn't know if he would feel like getting up off the sofa even if his flat should catch on fire.
Teddy dozed, knowing he'd feel heaps better if he went and had a shower--and the Pepper-Up that was sitting in the bathroom cupboard--but he didn't want to move.
When the owl started tapping on the window, increasing the volume of the pounding in his head, Teddy nearly hexed the damned thing. His heart leapt when he had an idea of who the owl might be from--Dad!--but the handwriting on the envelope was unfamiliar, and Teddy sank back down upon the sofa with a yawn and a sigh.
Hey Ted, he read in the scrawled hand. I remembered you said you had to spend time at your old man's house on Sunday, but I wondered if maybe you'd like to go out for a drink tonight, or grab some dinner? Afternoon practise for the reserve squad will be over by 5.00. If your reply owl doesn't reach me before we start, I'll get the message when we're done. I thought maybe the Leaky Cauldron. Hope to see you tonight. Andrew.
Reading Andrew's message cheered Teddy up considerably. He was supposed to work until seven that night--Madam Poyt always needed extra cleaning done after the weekend, when she restocked all the bins at Slug and Jiggers and invariably seemed to spill things--but since he worked so close to the Leaky, and presumably Andrew might want to wash up after practise, maybe seven would be all right.
He scribbled a hasty note in reply, tied it to the brown owl's leg and gave it an Owl Treat before opening the window. His head still throbbed, but now that the day seemed considerably more worthwhile than it had earlier, he went into the bathroom for a dose of Pepper-Up and took a nice hot shower while he was at it. Washing his cock and balls and arse inevitably reminded him again of the day before. Well. He mightn't have had all the lessons his father had planned, yet, but he did feel more confident in what he might do with Andrew... if it came to that. Which, Teddy decided, he definitely hoped it would.
It was after eleven by the time he left his flat, so he stopped in a Muggle shop and bought himself an egg sandwich for an early lunch before work, and a cheese and tomato one for his tea. He'd have liked prawn, but didn't think that stale fishy breath was what he wanted for a date. It was a date, wasn't it? Teddy grinned to himself as he took a big bite. Funny, that his first proper date after leaving school would be with another bloke, when he'd spent all of last year with Victoire, for whose attentions most of the male students of any age had vied.
Madam Poyt was in a good mood, chattering to Teddy about her grandchildren and her family's holiday plans. He'd long since learned to nod at appropriate moments without really listening, so the day passed quickly.
He'd told Andrew that unless he heard otherwise from Andrew, he'd be at the Leaky shortly after seven and wait until eight. As soon as Slug and Jiggers was locked up for the night, he turned his hair magenta again, hurried down the cold street, and stepped gratefully into the pub's warmth, looking around to see if Andrew was there.
"Ted, over here!" He heard Andrew's voice.
To his relief, Andrew was alone, as he'd assumed and only worried later might not be the case. But none of the other Pride team members were there, just Andrew with a half-empty pint glass in front of him.
Teddy slid into the booth across from Andrew and tried--but failed--to keep from breaking out in an enormous grin. So much for playing it cool--but Andrew didn't seem to mind. He grinned back at Teddy, then stared down into his pint glass for a moment as if attempting to calm himself down.
When Andrew looked up, he was still smiling. "Sorry," he said, "I'm not usually this, um, silly. I've just been looking forward to seeing you."
Silly? Okay, Andrew was definitely as queer as they came. Teddy laughed a little. It was pretty damned endearing.
"You're fine," he said, signalling the waitress. "So have I." He ordered a pint for himself and another for Andrew, and when the waitress left, he continued. "I'm sorry if I smell a little funny--I just got off work. Slug and Jiggers. You know."
Andrew drained the last of the ale from his glass. "Been in there a time or two, yeah, I know it--but you smell fine. From here, anyway." He looked around and leaned forward, murmuring, "I'd have to get closer to tell for sure."
A hot wave washed over Teddy, followed by an icy one--Andrew was flirting with him! In the middle of the Leaky, where anyone could see! It was noisy enough, he supposed, that probably no one would have heard, but Teddy wasn't exactly ready to take the chance that anyone might. And, he supposed, neither was Andrew, from the way he'd looked around like that.
He swallowed hard and began to form a semblance of a response just as their pints arrived. Teddy busied himself with a hearty swallow, giving himself a couple of extra seconds to come up with a response. Sure, they'd done some snogging and groping the other night, but Teddy was pretty sure Andrew had been quite drunk. He squirmed in his seat as he remembered Andrew cupping his cock through his jeans--then flashed on his father doing the same thing.
Okay. Fuck it.
"That could be arranged," Teddy replied, giving his best imitation of a saucy smile. He took another gulp of beer, raising his eyebrows in a challenge.
Andrew backpedalled. "I mean--I don't want you to think all I want is a quick... you know." He gave that same furtive glance over both his shoulders as if to be sure no one was spying on their conversation. "Okay?" He leaned forward, speaking even more softly. "I know I was pretty drunk the other night, when we, uh--but I liked you before we did all that, too." Colour rose in his cheeks, and that was when it finally got through to Teddy how young Andrew was--scarcely older than himself. Teddy didn't remember him from Hogwarts, though; perhaps he'd gone to one of the Continental schools.
Teddy blushed, too. "Okay," he said, wiping condensation from his glass and leaning forward so their heads were quite close together, "But I hope a fuck's not entirely out of the question." Oh, shit, had he actually just said that? Had he gone too far? Shit. He wasn't sure if he was actually ready for an actual fuck...
It was Andrew's turn for speechlessness. He sat across from Teddy with his mouth slightly open, his eyes wide. Finally, he shook his head.
"No," he said, "um. Maybe we should get out of here."
Teddy drained his glass and set it down with a bang. A line he'd once heard in a Muggle film came out of his mouth before he realised what he was saying, and he hoped to god it didn't sound cheesy to Andrew.
"Okay, then. Your place or mine?"
Andrew lifted his glass and finished it slowly, looking all around him as he did so. Who, exactly, was he expecting to be listening to them? "Um," he said finally, "I expect yours is closer."
"Yeah. I'm not on the Floo Network, though. It's maybe a twenty-minute walk."
"Yours, then--but I'd rather have something to eat first, if you don't mind," said Andrew. "Practise always makes me starved."
"Of course." Teddy licked his lips. "We could pick up something on the way to my flat. There's a decent curry shop on the way, or Chinese."
"Spicy?" Andrew sounded doubtful. He stood and began pulling on his coat, and so did Teddy, being sure to accidentally brush up against Andrew, who shrank away at the contact. Okay, maybe he was a bit shy.
"Not if you don't want. On the menu they put a little symbol of a chile next to the dishes that are hot," Teddy explained, wondering if Andrew didn't spend much time in the Muggle world. Well, if it hadn't been for Teddy's godfather Harry taking Teddy to Muggle places as a kid, he might not know very much either.
Andrew paused, then leaned close. "There should be one on you, then," he muttered close to Teddy's ear, and he turned red again under his shaggy fair fringe.
"You too." Teddy's heart was beating fast. "Shall we go, then?"
They walked close together through the chilly night, but they didn't touch. Andrew talked about his practise that day, which hadn't gone very well, one of the other Chasers being injured by a Bludger. When they had almost reached Bombay Curry, Teddy asked in an undertone if Andrew wanted him to order.
"You'll probably choose better," admitted Andrew.
"Fine--just tell me what kind of meat you like and I'll go from there."
Andrew liked lamb, so Teddy ended up ordering a rogan josh, asking to make sure it wouldn't be too spicy, and Malai prawns since Teddy wanted something in a coconut sauce. He made sure they'd have a couple of different chutneys and raitas, and added rice and chapatis. Luckily he had enough Muggle money with him to pay for it all, and they each carried one of the delicious-smelling bags back to his flat.
At Teddy's flat, they sat at his little kitchen table devouring the takeaway--Teddy was hungrier than he'd thought he was--and chatting like old friends. They'd discovered they had quite a lot in common, and Teddy felt himself warming up to Andrew on more levels than just the physical. He felt a bit foolish for all his bravado back at the Leaky, and was glad when they fell into easy conversation.
When the meal was finished, Andrew stood and began to clear away the takeaway containers and dishes.
"Forget it," Teddy said, "I can get those later."
"You're sure?" Andrew stood by the table, shifting from foot to foot, his hands in the pockets of his jeans, looking quite young again.
"Yeah," Teddy said, summoning all his courage and moving closer to Andrew. "Definitely." He knew his breath probably wasn't smelling its best, but Andrew had just consumed plenty of garlic and strange seasonings as well, so he put a shaking hand on Andrew's shoulder and leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips.
And a moment later--thank god--Andrew responded, kissing him back, slowly at first, then Teddy put his hands in Andrew's hair and they both intensified the kiss, opening their mouths, their tongues brushing tentatively against one another. Andrew made a little needy sound in the back of his throat and put his arms around Teddy, and a moment later, they broke the kiss, both breathing hard.
"Hey," Teddy whispered, his eyes half-closed, his lips puffy. He leaned his forehead against Andrew's, and Andrew leaned back, closing his eyes.
"Hey," Andrew whispered back. They held each other close for a long moment. Teddy let his hands wander over Andrew's back, tracing a crooked trail down his spine and back up again, and Andrew shivered.
Teddy smiled and moved to kiss his neck, pleased by his application so far of the lessons he'd learned and encouraged by Andrew's response, but Andrew twisted his neck away.
"Sorry," he said, grinning sheepishly, "I'm just really ticklish there."
"You're all right," Teddy murmured, "Come here." He carded one hand through Andrew's hair and ran the other up and down Andrew's back again, and Andrew melted a little into their embrace. Teddy kissed him, then, and Andrew kissed him back fiercely, his hands on either side of Teddy's face.
Andrew broke their kiss just long enough to gasp "Bedroom?" and Teddy nodded and began to walk him backwards into the little bedroom, kissing him all the while.
He hadn't made his bed that morning, and there were clothes strewn over it, but Andrew didn't seem to mind as Teddy shoved everything that was in the way to the floor. The pause gave Teddy time enough to feel nervous again. He covered it by starting to undress Andrew, tugging Andrew's shirt out from his trousers and sliding his hands up along the bare skin of Andrew's back as he kissed him again.
The kisses were wet though not sloppy and Teddy was beginning to get really aroused as they rolled around on the bed. He let his fingers slide under Andrew's waistband.
"Hang on." Andrew fumbled with the buttons of Teddy's shirt, first, and Teddy was happy enough to let it be taken off, to reciprocate so that they lay chest to chest with their trousers still on, shoes kicked off onto the floor.
"That's cool," Andrew said, stroking the sparse hair on Teddy's chest. "That you can turn it that colour, you know? Never seen anyone do that before."
Teddy grinned and turned all his hair blue, then green, then bright orange, then back to the magenta. "It's fun sometimes, yeah."
"What colour is it for real?"
"Just brown." Teddy let it flicker to natural for a moment. "Not very interesting."
"I like that too." Andrew brushed his thumb across Teddy's nipple, his eyes intent on Teddy's face. Teddy hummed and nodded and reached to touch Andrew in the same way.
"You can pinch harder," Teddy said, and Andrew did, a little hesitantly, then when Teddy moaned a bit and nodded, he twisted them. "Oh, yeah."
They kept on with that, kissing in between, until Teddy started to think he might come in his pants without even getting naked. He reached for Andrew's cock, as stiff as his own through the fabric, and Andrew gasped, "Yes," fumbling at Teddy's zip to undo it, too.
Andrew seemed to be as excited as Teddy was, judging from the way he tore at Teddy's jeans and helped get his own off. He kept twisting one of Teddy's nipples while they undressed until Teddy had to beg him to stop.
"Please--I'll--oh, okay, oh god, that's good, but--" Teddy swatted Andrew's hand away from his chest. Andrew didn't seem to mind--he just shoved Teddy's pants down with both hands, then his own, and their cocks slapped together, causing Teddy to let out an embarrassingly theatrical moan.
"Do you have--lube?" Andrew gasped. One of his hands crept back, back between Teddy's legs, towards his arsehole, and it took all the reserve Teddy had not to swat Andrew's hand away again. Okay. Oh god. They were actually going to fuck. A chorus of I'm not ready for this! echoed in Teddy's brain while his body took over, running on adrenaline and testosterone.
He rolled Andrew over, mumbling "Fuck it" just loud enough for Andrew to hear, then dropped a frantic series of kisses down Andrew's chest and belly. Andrew's whole body stiffened when Teddy took his cock in his mouth, and Teddy smiled as much as he could, groaning a little to let Andrew know it was all right.
"Fuck--fuck, Ted," Andrew gasped. He twisted his hands in Teddy's hair, and Teddy nodded, hollowing his cheeks and swallowing hard around Andrew's cock. Andrew kicked his legs out, and Teddy stretched out upon them, holding him still. He caressed Andrew's bollocks with one hand and Andrew wriggled underneath him, letting out wordless little cries.
Then his grip tightened on Teddy's hair and he gasped out a warning and pulled, hard, but Teddy was too caught up in preventing a fuck to realise that Andrew had been saying gonna come. He only sucked harder, taking more of Andrew's prick in his mouth, and all of a moment there was a flood of semen coating Teddy's tongue. He choked and his eyes began to water, but he swallowed hard. A little of Andrew's come dribbled out the side of his mouth, running down his chin and onto his neck, but Teddy didn't give a damn. He'd done it--sucked someone off, made someone come, someone who wanted him, as was evidenced by Andrew's hands grasping blindly for Teddy's embrace.
"Bloody hell," Andrew gasped, putting his arms around Teddy. "You're good at that!"
Teddy ducked his head and smiled and pressed a kiss to Andrew's collarbone. His prick still raged with hormones and need, and he pressed it against Andrew's thigh.
"Is--oh--" Andrew said then, and he reached for Teddy's erection. "Do you want me to--?" The question hung in the air, and for a moment Teddy wasn't sure what Andrew meant, until Andrew began moving downwards.
"Oh," he breathed, "Only if you want to--" His protestation was half-hearted and, it turned out, unnecessary, as Andrew took to sucking cock with the same exuberance he showed on a broom. Only afterward would Teddy think about technique, and judge Andrew less good than Remus--not exactly a surprise--but significantly better than either of the boys who'd done it to Teddy at Hogwarts. Right now he could only moan and sigh and, far too soon, have to warn Andrew that he was going to come. Andrew didn't stop any more than Teddy had, but he did spit out Teddy's semen afterward, making a face.
"Sorry," he said as he wiped his mouth, and kissed Teddy apologetically. "Was afraid I'd gag on it."
"'S okay. It felt brilliant anyhow." Teddy ran a hand along Andrew's skin, glad that Andrew seemed quite happy to stay there, with their legs entangled, all sticky with sweat. He kissed Andrew again, tasting himself, the flavour diminishing as the kiss went on.
"I wish I could stay," said Andrew presently.
"You can't?" Teddy was disappointed.
Andrew shook his head. "Morning practise tomorrow, and they have us eat breakfast together first, make sure we're eating right." He gave a snort, sitting up and peering around for his clothing. "But at least it's free."
"I have to work early tomorrow too," admitted Teddy as he watched Andrew get dressed again, and found his own pyjama bottoms to pull on. "But look, I really had a good time tonight. Um. Maybe we could meet up again later this week?"
"I'd like that a lot." Andrew ran his fingers through his hair and smiled. "When's good for you?"
Teddy thought for a minute. Madam Poyt changed his schedule a lot. "I don't have to work till noon on Thursday, this week."
"Perfect. I have Thursday off too. I mean, I'll want to fly some, but there's no regular practise that day, not for the reserves. Want to meet me Wednesday evening? I don't actually live in Portree, but in Glasgow; more wizards there. And I am on the Floo, or you can Apparate--I'll write down the address for you."
"Great." Teddy took the scrap of parchment and walked with Andrew to the front door, awkwardly holding out his hand to shake goodbye, and pleased when Andrew ignored it to give him a quick clumsy hug instead. "See you Wednesday night, then."
He shut the door behind Andrew and leaned against it, an enormous grin on his face.