I mean, you can, and I guess I can remember to feed you.
But there is a lock on the door.
So you could probably just make a blanket fort and stay there...
John
Old habits.
But I guess I can settle for a locked door and blanket fort.
Morgan
Okay. I have enough blankets.
But um.
Why?
John
No chance it can just be a mystery, huh?
My mom [...]
Not the dead one because Jesus fuck I'd need more than a blanket fort for that.
But the other one.
She showed up today.
Morgan
Okay!
Do you have like... A family magnet in your pants or something?
Cause I'm gonna need you to turn that off.
Before you get into the blanket fort that I'm making
And before the truck load of comfort food gets here.
John
Maybe before I enter the John sanctuary we need an airport level search.
Because it sure as fuck ain't in my pants.
And I sure as fuck don't know how to turn it off.
Morgan
We're going to need some parent repellent for you.
You're like the reverse Brady Bunch.
Three not-dads, a not-mom, a not-twin, two not-stepmoms and a step-mom!
What fucks up magnets? You're the smart one, how do we screw up a magnet?
John
Do they make parent repellent?
I'll buy in bulk if they do.
I've been trying not to keep count but that's too many not-my Starks and their various love interests.
Lots of heat. Or some heavy hammering.
Wanna give fire a go?
Morgan
I have so many things I can say to that but I am keeping it in.
I'll do it to your face just to give you a laugh instead.
But I don't think setting you on fire will be a good idea.
So, comfort food and trash talking?
John
Ooof. I think I walked right into this one.
But I still want to hear it later.
Damn. Alright. Fine. No actual fire,
You, comfort food, the blanket fort, trash talking...
And me trying to figure out how to deal with Nat most likely being sad actual!Dad isn't here.
When I'm perfectly fine with it.
Morgan
I'm all in on this.
I think I can probably get the tv from the living room to the bedroom too.
Who puts things on walls anymore?
This is clearly a design flaw.
But... Maybe she'll be perfectly content that actual Morgan is here?
John
Knew you would be.
Missing "old" tube TV's?
I could probably build you one.
Oh sure, Be all wonderful and insightful.
Morgan
I don't know if I'd go that far.
Maybe just the time when the tv was on the table with wheels.
And you just pushed it into whatever room you wanted it in.
I'm just throwing it out there.
Sometimes... apparently, parents can surprise you by not sucking.
John
We could raid a school?
I'm pretty sure they still have those.
[...] "Apparently"
Yeah, yeah.
Sometimes. Not sucking. All that.
Honestly? If any actual parent was gonna show up? Nat would be the one I picked.
Morgan
I'll need to stand guard.
I'm not meant to go within 40 feet of schools.
Arson issues.
Yeah, yeah.
No one is saying jump right in. We can be petty bitches for a couple of days.
But... I mean if she's the one with the least amount of baggage.
John
Do court orders transfer to pocket dimensions?
Better safe than sorry I guess.
I don't have anything to put up for bail.
You're telling me the story behind this, though.
This is why I like you. You always encourage my petty.
Not the least baggage. But definitely the least amount of Morgan baggage.
Morgan
Maybe we should rob the candy stall while you're there.
In for a penny, in for a pound?
I set fire to a school. That's pretty much the story. I mean, I was 13 and my powers were unpredictable.
Also everyone was inside the school and the chemistry lab did not help things at all.
I am a petty bitch. I will always encourage.
Shoot for the closest hole.
Or some other golf analogy.
John
What is going to stop us from eating all the candy...
Before we can put it to good use?
Okay but. You were literally a kid? Who didn't know how to control his shit.
I'm all here for your criminal record but I don't think this applies.
Lucky for you? I'm just as much of a petty bitch. Encouraging all around.
Why do you know golf analogies?
Morgan
Absolutely nothing.
We're the adults and no one can stop us.
Well, mutants were not exactly accepted, so most people just thought I was a fucking lunatic who started fires.
This was before Mutant Boarding School of Hormones and Repression.
Insomnia TV is mostly golf and teleshopping.
John
It would be amusing to see someone try to stop us.
Fucking Hormones and Repression.
It never got better did it?
Pro-tip? Always go for the teleshopping, John.
Morgan
You have a million parents. Don't tempt them.
It got steadily worse, but there were a few moments in there where I thought it might've started looking up.
Not when it's just some old woman trying to peddle her shitty pottery.
John
Excuse you. I am a grown ass woman.
At least there were a few moments? Doesn't make any of it better. But at least it wasn't all bullshit/hell?
The old pottery woman is better than the old sex toy woman.
Morgan
We're about to go into a blanket fort, watch tv and gossip like teenage girls.
Neither of us are grown ass anything.
Shit happens, right? I mean, I at least have a background of shit to back me up when people say 'so why did you think becoming a terrorist and burning the world was a good idea?'
Why would you put that in my head? I'm going to be scared to watch teleshopping.
John
Alright. Good point.
I like us this way, though.
Yeah. Shit happens. I wouldn't have blamed you if you had burned the whole world. Wait [...] literal terrorist or colorful descriptor?
And if I have to live with that nightmare? So do you.
Morgan
Did I gloss over the fact that I am, technically, a wanted terrorist in my world for blowing up buildings for political reasons?
I feel like we're too traumatised to start sharing them.
We need to split the difference.
John
You may have failed to mention that, yes.
So, new rule. For future reference or whatever.
We split the nightmares and childhood trauma difference.
And no teleshopping after 2am when we both can't sleep.
Morgan
It's like... kinda for a good reason? The terrorist thing.
That seems like a solid rule.
For future reference.
So you're coming around to the golf?
John
I figured you had your reasons. Also? Not exactly information you work into conversation with a girl who accidentally wakes up in your bed.
We'll start tonight. With the rule.
I guess I am.
Morgan
Probably something you mention to the girl who's staying over semi-regular and has her own toothbrush though.
Probably something you mention to the girl who's staying over semi-regular and has her own toothbrush though.
The bonus is that at 4am it's the highlights, so it's literally just the decent golfers you see.
John
Probably.
But your world was shit, John. I only know a little bit about it and I know It was shit.
You don't have to explain the terrorist thing but if you want to tell me that good reason? We can work it in with the food and petty.
So, what I'm getting from this? Is that I don't have to pay attention until 4am.
Morgan
It's a soul sucking depressive shit hole.
Other versions of it don't sound too much better.
Blanket fort conversation. Probably while on a sugar high.
There's usually some dumb shit on the tv before 4am though.
John
It seems like if one world is fucked?
All of the other versions are somehow fucked too.
I'm all in.
Just grabbing some stuff then I'll be on my way for blanket fort lock down, demagnetizing, and dumb shit before 4am.