Lexi | Katherine
Does it really have to make sense to anyone why I'm doing it, as long as I do it, and I mean it?
It's a multitude of things. I don't need to run from Klaus here. I know he could come through the Seal at any second and that's something I'll have to deal with if it ever happens, but as it is now, I don't have that. I'm more isolated here than I've ever been. People know about me, about what I've done, and I can't make a move without people assuming there's an ulterior motive. And for some people, maybe even most, that might not ever change, and that's something I have to accept. But when it comes straight down to it? It's lonely on this side of the fence and I've not been without the ability to compel friends, lovers, companions of some kind in a long time. I didn't have to be lonely back home, I just made people like me and want to be around me. I don't have that here, either and I guess in a lot of ways the isolation made me realize that. More than anything, though, the humanity switch starts to fail as time goes on, doesn't work quite as well as it used to. Still works, but the humanity is always there, fighting to get out, and sometimes it slips through, little here, little there... I'm tired of fighting, Lexi. So tired.