There's you handling something crazy and difficult, then there's you handling something crazy and impossible. No one could put up with what you're talking about and the fact that me telling you this on a daily basis now is becoming beyond frustrating.
You were wrong about that and you're wrong about this. You're making this huge, massively destructive decisions and you're not even thinking about the consequences, are you? All you want to do is find the quickest way to kill yourself, so long as it's noble and good and gets you away from me.