The way he treated them. Of course it would be that. The daggering, the way he was oh so like their monster of a father, so much so he didn't even see it himself. He normally would have lashed out, gotten defensive, but there was little point. Kol was as tired of it as he was, and yes, he did tire of it. Which meant they needed to listen to him, heed his words, trust that he above all knew what was best for them.
"And if I were to snap, then what? If you all ask for one mercy too many. Because Kol if you do not see what I have done as trying then you ask too much from me. Katerina, Rosemarie, Stefan. Allowing Rebekah her freedom. And yes, I know how it sounds. But I keep you close because I have to. Because to keep that promise we made so long ago then I need to do that. Do you understand, at all? Do you see how much you push me. I'm not the good brother, the kind brother. But I am the one that gets things done when they need to be. So either accept that or..."
Looked up to him. He didn't quite see how that made sense. Kol had chafed against his control more than any of the others. Ran to the East, then to witches, then as far away as he could often get. "Honestly brother I thought perhaps you wanted to be me. And you couldn't stay because you knew you couldn't be. Because you resented me. I didn't for a second believe you looked up to me. I wasn't much to look up to in mortal life."
"You can be there while I paint, we can talk. Beyond that, please, just stop pushing. You know where it will end, daggers or none. And neither of us want that."