If Guy had brought up his fears to her, that she had only kept him out because she more genuinely feared him, she'd have possibly set him right. John had been allowed in once, briefly, just so he'd shut up about making sure she was physically all right. She hadn't said a single word in his presence and he'd taken the hint and left. And the Doctor...well, that was before she'd remembered to lock the door. Not that he couldn't still get in if he wanted to. The TARDIS knew him well enough to let him in wherever he chose. But she wouldn't be able to explain any of that to someone with Guy's insecurities. She did acknowledge his jealousy and his annoyance with her having so many male friends, but she wasn't going to change, not even for him. She'd learned with one man what it was to be forced around and since she'd been spectacularly dumped by Jimmy Stone and left entirely alone, she wasn't ever going to let a man push her around again.
None of this would be brought up just then, however. Not when she was having a hard enough time making words come out. Thousands of them were running through her mind. How sorry she was for worrying him, how scared she was of everyone and everything. How heartbroken she was to even think that the people she loved so much would hurt her. But voicing that was so much more difficult.
She hesitated, closing her eyes and resting her forehead against the door. His voice was so familiar, so comforting. She could listen to him talk all day. That rich, deep baritone that seemed to just rumble from within him. It brought so many memories to the front of her mind. Nights spent in his arms, listening to him talk, sharing stories, trading secrets. She so badly wished she could have that again.
"No," she answered softly. Then she reconsidered. "The last several years of my life back would be a start." It was the most honest she'd been, out loud at least, with anyone since she'd returned. 'Returned'. Was it possible? Was there any hope left at all?