Honestly, she didn't want to. Asking for help, even from someone like Jo. It just felt like failing to her. And in this new state she already felt so completely weak, so lost, that she didn't know how to take that feeling away. And asking for help was admitting that she couldn't handle it. And in truth, she knew that Jo wouldn't think of it like that, no one would. They'd just see it as helping their friend. It seemed faintly ridiculous that she was this worried about it. But there it was. And while she was as conflicted as ever, she was willing to listen to Sam. He'd help her through. He'd talk her through it all and everything would be better.
If he didn't call her old that was. "I don't look old though do I?" she told him with a mock offended look. "You don't feel like you married a Grandma or something?" He was running his hand through her hair and it felt nice. It always felt nice, but now with all the crazy swirling emotions, all Ruby could do was hope that he'd always be there for her like this, when she needed him. When she was having crazy moments, when she was acting like the world was falling apart around her because she wasn't as strong as she used to be. In those times, all she had to do was remember that she had Sam, and that Sam loved her. Even if it meant eating health food. "Sometimes I want fries, I demand them even. And greasy unhealthy meals. Just on occasion. Otherwise I'll be good. Cause I know you, and you'd be ridiculous. There'd be sulking."
It wasn't what she wanted. Oh she'd thought it was. For so long she'd thought being human would make things easier. And in some ways it did. In some ways things were much simpler. Sam didn't have to focus so hard not to think about her blood. He didn't need to crave her like he had. It was a little horrible. And when she'd been a vampire at least she'd been strong. "You liked me being that, just a little bit. There are some good memories you know." she told him, lifting his hand up to her lips in a show of affection.
When he drank the whiskey, the former demon sat up. Still leaning against him but wanting to be close. Both to her husband and to the drink he was trying to distract her from. "Its gonna be hard Sam. It's gonna be messy and I'm probably gonna mess up more than most. But I trust you." She tilted her head for a kiss knowing that the trust she had, it had to be enough. He'd help her through.