InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Hagrid's buttcrack!"

vc_player_npc (vc_player_npc) wrote in vas_captio_rpg,
@ 2009-05-29 14:45:00

Entry tags:

!dropped, day 08, glados, npc, open

Day Eight: Without Much Fanfare
Who: clone!Jack and OTA
What: clone!Jack was not supposed to be permanent after all
When: Near midnight
Where: Near the Post Office
Rating: TBD
Status: Dropped

It was not a very bad feeling. Dying. He felt kind of peaceful and there was no more happy bounce to his step when he walked across the street to the weird little building that looked to him like a post office from some past era. He was not at all sure how he knew that it was near the end for him but he did. He was clutching his leatherbound journal and feeling sort of drunkish even though he had not had a drop to drink. Not ever in his own life. In fact, he had not eaten or done anything but make people feel very scared or mad. That was not what he had wanted to do at all!

No one had wanted to see his big secret surprise either! That was the unfairest thing of all and that was why he started to feel sad again. Until he opened the journal and there was Ianto being so very sweet the way Ianto was when he wanted to be. Even if almost Jack was not the REAL Jack, Ianto acted kind of like he would take care of him anyway. Maybe if he had been able to stick around longer they could have been friends.

Oh well. That would not happen now. He stumbled to a seat against the post office door and sprawled out his legs. He did not care that it was cold underneath his bottom. He felt tired and sort of maybe giggly? That made him want to sing. So why not?

Without much fanfare and very much giggliness and sadness and drunkish feelings all through him, not Jack began to croon as loud as he could.

"Now it's time to say goodbye to all our company - hiccup - J-A-C... see you in the afterlife... K-H-A... eh? is that the light? R-K-N-E-S-Sssss - hiccup!"

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sarcasmquotes
2009-05-31 12:21 pm UTC (link)

GLaDOS was fairly certain that she was not a clone. If she was a clone, and was meant to die in the manner of this man, there was no probability that she could stop it anyway. At least he was not contagious, a concept she was not accustomed to having to think about. This was a curious experience.

"A funny story?" GLaDOS asked this in a tone she did not use often - one marked with curiosity. "I am not a very good story teller," GLaDOS, unfortunately, did not understand the notion of empathy. She only knew how to observe and process and evaluate. She knew what the word meant, but did not understand it in practice. "Do you know any funny stories? I have not laughed."

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vc_player_npc
2009-05-31 12:27 pm UTC (link)

Almost Jack looked almost scandalized. He sat up a little and leaned toward her in a bleary, swimmy kind of way to look at her with dramatic confusion. "You have not laughed? You mean not ever ever? Never laughed? Oh that is much sadder than me dying! Much sadder than Ianto not loving me too! You poor poor thing."

Now he had something else to think of he was thinking about a story that might make someone who had never laughed start laughing. That was the biggest tragedy in his mind right now. How was it possible this woman had never ever laughed? She must have had such a very sad life to never laugh. So he picked his mixed up and cottony brain for a story and settled on another song to sing to her.

"Ah here is one." He rested back against the Post Office and looked up as he tried to remember the words to the first verse perfectly. "OHhhhhh I was born one night, one morn, when the whistle went toot toot! You could bake a steak and fry a cake when the mudpies were in bloom. Does six and six make nine? Does ice grow on a vine? Was old black Joe an eskimo in the good old summer time?!"

He took a deep breath then and peeked at the woman to see if she was at least smiling yet.

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sarcasmquotes
2009-05-31 12:34 pm UTC (link)

GLaDOS had never laughed in the happy, jovial way. It was sort of similar as to how the concept of something made sense; yet it was never practiced. Sure, she had pumped the sound of her voice laughing in the general direction of her subjects; but, she had never felt-laughter. She noticed that the clone seemed a bit disappointed with this fact. It was although his newest mission in life had become to introduce her to humor.

She listened intently trying to make sense of the gibberish the fellow was singing. She could not. However, she did hear one of her favorite words: Cake. That word made her face turn to a smile. "I very much like cake," she said somewhat seriously. "Do you like cake?" She wondered if the clone were faulty and perhaps did not know the meaning of the words he spoke.

"Why did you say you had a secret surprise? Is that mean for someone? I could give it to them for you," GLaDOS, now that threats had been analyzed had found her curiosity core at nearly 90% - she was intrigued. GLaDOS liked knowing almost as much as she liked understanding.

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vc_player_npc
2009-05-31 01:00 pm UTC (link)

Almost Jack saw that smile and it warmed him inside and out. This was more fun than he had expected. More fun than anything all day long! He supposed that if he had to wait until he was dying to have some fun then not everything was all bad about this whole being a clone thing. It had not been a waste either if he could make someone smile who had never laughed. He just had to wear her down little by little and she would laugh finally. That really excited him.

He was about to launch into verse two of his song when she asked him another question. "I think I like cake. I have never had any. It would be nice to have cake before I died but I do not think there is cake here. There wasn't any coffee earlier." Almost Jack smiled serenely. It should have made him feel sad but he didn't think he could feel sad anymore. Not when she had never laughed.

Hiccuping and with his elbows twitching sort of like wings trying to fly, not Jack looked excitedly at the woman. Was someone really asking about his secret surprise? Did someone finally care about it? Oh the peaceful glee! "I have a big secret surprise and I tried to show it to everyone I met but no one wanted to see it. They all looked at me like I was telling them I had a pie that I was going to throw in their faces. Not fun, I tell you. Not fair either. Do you want to see my secret surprise?"

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sarcasmquotes
2009-06-01 10:44 am UTC (link)

GLaDOS' expression fell a bit as Jack said he had never had cake. That made her disappointed. How could someone never have had cake? It did not make sense for this place to deprive people of such a basic necessity. "Cake is more important than coffee," GLaDOS pronounced and so it was.

"You do not appear to be carrying anything of significant size to warrant calling it big."

GLaDOS blinked as he continued to flail a bit there. It was a strange sight to her - usually, in her experience, when people died they simply did so very quickly and very quietly. Well, aside from the ones who fell into the acid. She put up helpful signs to remind people of the penalties of falling into the acid. Some did it anyway.

"I am curious as to what your surprise might be." She said plainly, the cant of her head giving away the true level of her curiousity.

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vc_player_npc
2009-06-01 01:19 pm UTC (link)

"Is it more important than coffee? Maybe you are right!" Almost Jack looked critically at the woman. At least he thought he looked critical but his might have been crossed. His elbows flapped and his emotions were rollercoastering more than they had all day long. Not fun at all but it made him very very happy!

"It is big, believe me. It's very big and very secret because only I have it in the entire world." He took a shaky, swimmy breath and swayed his head from side to side in time to a song inside his head. It sounded like it was all around him which was scary in a very exciting way. Maybe this was a birthday party! He hoped so! Maybe there would even be cake and s'mores!

"I can show it to you right now!" Oh yay thank the gods above. Someone finally wanted to see his big secret surprise. Not Jack sat forward and reached into the back of his long coat as best he could because his fingers were doing marching puppet dances with no puppets attached. His knees felt very ticklish and they were bouncing a little too. This was fun but it made him very sad.

It took him some time to pull out the secret surprise. It was very big. Almost as big as he was and flat, rather sort of crinkled from being tucked into the back of his pants all day, and shiny. He held it up for her to see with a very proud expression on his face. "See? Isn't it fantastic?"

In the semi-darkness of midnight it was not hard for anyone to see that he had the world's largest autographed photograph of Britney Spears' 2035 Reunion Tour: Oops I Shaved It Again! (Bald is beautiful).

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sarcasmquotes
2009-06-02 08:36 am UTC (link)

"I have never had coffee, but in my experience subjects tend to get very excited for cake."

GLaDOS' head tilted in the other direction. There were few things that could be large enough so as to remain undetected on this person's figure. If this person was speaking metaphorically, it was lost on GLaDOS.

GLaDOS watched as the paper was taken from behind the figured back and brought out into the open air. GLaDOS, unfortunately, was unfamiliar with what precisely the picture was or what it was for. Furthermore, she was totally left in the dark as to why in the world a woman would shave her head. Additionally, what was the purpose of being nearly naked? Wasn't she cold?

"What is the purpose of this large photograh?" GLaDOS inquired. For this subject to be so excited for it and to carry it around and denote it as a surprise, it must have some greater purpose and she wanted to know what precisely that was.

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