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Jenny Schecter ([info]dont_f_withme) wrote in [info]vas_captio_rpg,
@ 2009-05-12 15:48:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:!complete, day 07, jenny schecter, location: theatre, sid jenkins

Day 7: Early Afternoon
Who: Jenny & Sid
What: Jenny wants a shower
When: Early Afternoon
Where: The Theater (to start)
Rating: R (when do we ever not have language?)
Status: Complete

Jenny stood in the doorway to the green room, leaning against the doorframe with her cheek against the jamb. She played idly with her hair, twirling one long dark tendril around her finger over and over again. Her expression was a bit dreamy but she was really thinking, struggling to decide. She'd been here a few days now and it was time for a shower or cleanliness of some sort. She'd heard that there had been a few things in the gas station but considering the snow was nearing the second story windows, she wasn't going out there by herself to fetch anything. That left asking someone to go with her and she wasn't sure about the other girls. She did not want to come across as being too helpless when she clearly was not. Still, Shannon's words flashed in her mind that this place was dangerous - and was it! - and she needed someone to protect her.

Watching the kid in the green room, her eyes followed the movement of his arms with each annoying slap of the ball he'd found against the wall or floor or the palm of his hand. Sid. She was actually contemplating asking this kid who was probably 10 years younger than her, even if he did hold the promise of some muscle beneath the layers, to help her go and get shower supplies. And then perhaps even accompany her to the shower so she wouldn't have to go alone. Why the fuck were there no other men in this theater when she needed them? Where had Logan gone after the failed rescue attempt when she'd ended up naked on stage with Leo? Where the fuck was Leo, for that matter?

Sid. She was stuck with Sid. And he was nice enough but she wasn't quite sure yet. Wasn't sure if it was even necessary for a shower now that she thought about it. She began to turn away and her dress caught on the bristled edge of the splintered doorframe. The small tear caused her to cuss. "Fucking fuck!" she hollered and glanced up quickly in a vain attempt to be sure he hadn't heard her. Of course he had, she'd been loud enough to wake the dead. The slapping of the ball had stopped and Jenny grimaced, trying to turn it into a sweet smile. "Sorry, um, my dress. I - would you come with me to the gas station?" she blurted out before she could stop herself.



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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 03:14 pm UTC (link)
The worst thing about this place - apart from the absence of Cass - was that unless he met up with Anders, there was nothing to do. Anders was a cool fucker, Sid thought; and he was gonna learn to be just as good at Pyramid as Anders was if it killed him. The problem with that, was that - as he'd found out when he'd tried to get out to have his morning cigarette - he couldn't actually get out of the theater to go to the gym unless he went out the window and even then, the gym would be blocked off by now, he thought. Sid wouldn't be getting in and Anders probably wouldn't be getting out...if he was still staying there, anyway.

So, for lack of anything else to do, Sid had decided to check out the new digs, actively avoiding the women so as not to unintentionally annoy any of them and get himself kicked to the curb. He'd come across the green room in what he thought might've been the basement and had been poking around when he'd found a small rubber ball amongst the random props. There was a couch down there with no cushions and the box spring felt awful on his arse, but it beat standing, so he'd dropped down on it and was absently tossing the ball, bouncing it off the walls or the floor only to catch it again and repeat the process. His mind wandered back to Cass and he wondered what she was doing; whether she was happy. He wondered if she missed him a fraction of as much as he missed her.

Sid paused in his movement to shrug off his coat and decided that he was definitely staying in the green room tonight, because it was somehow far warmer than the rest of the theater. Sid reckoned that was perhaps because it was a small room filled with stuff as opposed to a huge theater with nothing but chairs and a curtain. Going back to throwing the ball, he zoned out mulling over the fact that he was hungry and he really did not want to trudge through the snow to get food, much less have to use the snowdrift at the window as a slide to get to the ground in order to do it. He hadn't noticed another person in the room until she shouted and Sid missed the ball when it bounced back, smacking him in the face and knocking his glasses askew. He jumped and his heart started racing in his chest from the scare as he looked over at her.

Jenny, he thought, maybe. She apologized and indicated her dress; Sid saw the tear and opened his mouth to express his sympathy when she asked him to go to the gas station with her. "Sorry...?" he asked, blinking rapidly. He hadn't expected that, not by a long shot. "Me?" he asked stupidly, pointing at himself and raising his eyebrows before fixing his glasses so that they sit properly on his nose again.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 03:31 pm UTC (link)
Jenny bit her lower lip a little too hard as she noticed the ball had hit his face and knocked his glasses. She chewed it thoughtfully to recover from the slight pain and relished the small sensation. It worked as well as pinching herself, as she'd been doing a few times a day since she found herself here, and it meant she was still alive. Pain had a nice way of doing that for you.

She snorted softly, her eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. He looked so scared. She couldn't have been so unexpected as to have terrified him. Maybe he had been in thought and she had interrupted. So much the better though because that meant he at least wasn't an idiot. She could imagine him in some other situation, dressed in a dark suit with a bow tie and more reason to look as uncomfortable as he did then, looking on top of his game and ready for anything. But it wasn't hers to write the lives of others so she pushed it from her thoughts.

"Yes, you, silly goose," she said with a smile as though her dress had been forgotten. Inwardly she wanted to scream at the powers that be for putting her here in her best vintage tea dress only to have it ruined. It had been her favorite afternoon dress and now it would be so much garbage by the time she got out of here. Or died.

"I mean, you are the only man here and I," she swallowed and forced herself to say it, "need a man to help me get out of this building and find the gas station. I need ... things ... from there." She capped it all with another sweet smile and took a few steps toward him to put her hand on his forearm. Leaning slightly toward him she looked over her shoulder at the door and then back at him conspiratorially. "Being the only man in here with all these girls, I'm sure you realize what a hot commodity you are. That's why you've been hiding down here, right?"

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 03:51 pm UTC (link)
Sid furrowed his brow just slightly, looking back at her in surprise. He hadn't really thought about that. He was the only bloke staying here. He supposed the reason he hadn't thought about it was because he'd been so wrapped up in his own head. And then she was touching his arm and leaning in. Sid blinked. "Er..." he stalled. Was she...flirting with him? Nobody ever flirted with Sid. Well, 'cept Chelle, but that was different. Sort of. "I dunno..." he said with a shrug, a small impish grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. Hot commodity might be a bit much, but he did suddenly feel a boost in his ego. Sid liked the idea of being needed. Liked it almost as much as the idea of being wanted.

Taking a deep breath, he sighed. "Only, we're snowed in," he pointed out. "I tried to open the door earlier, but the wind blew the snow up against it and it won't budge," he explained, offering an apologetic look. "What do you need?" he asked suddenly, then, picking up his coat and patting it down. "I've got...crisps...Pepsi, fags - er, cigarettes - Pixie Stix..." his voice trailed off and he looked back up at her expectantly. Sid had a lot of useless shit in his coat and he was willing to share if it meant not having to go out in the bloody snow, even if it was kind of flattering that she was asking him.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 04:04 pm UTC (link)
Jenny's smile broadened and she gave Sid's forearm a friendly squeeze before releasing it. She knew if she poured it on too thickly he wouldn't believe a word of what she was saying and call bullshit on her. That was how men worked. They enjoyed the stroke of the ego but only so that it was believable. This was going to be delicate considering he didn't look like he completely believed her as it was.

Jenny arched a brow at him playfully. "I don't think you would ever have what I'm looking for in your pockets. You're a man."

Pausing, she thought for another moment. "Oh come on," she prodded airly, taking a step back to give him a mock stern expression, arms folding across her chest. "I'm sure you can figure some way for us to get out of here. There's a lot of junk in here. Maybe we could make some kind of slide or something and get out one of the upper story windows?"

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 04:35 pm UTC (link)
Sid's grin faded when she let go of his arm and looked back at him the way she was. Like she knew something he didn't. In fact, it seemed as though she did and his brow furrowed again with a bit of confusion as he tried to figure out what that was supposed to mean. Course he was man. "Yeah, but I've got just about everyth--oh. Ohhh," he replied, eyes going a little wide and cheeks turning pink. Yeah, Sid didn't have anything like that in his pockets. He rubbed the back of his neck and gave her another impish grin. "Right, sorry..." he replied.

"Right, well, there's the snow drift, yeah, we could slide down that," he replied in spite of trying very hard not to look a bit beaten down by the fact that a pretty girl was asking for his help; saying she needed a man and reminding him that he was it, when he wanted nothing more than to go back to throwing the rubber ball against the wall to kill time. It was bloody cold out there and she most definitely not dressed for it. "Are you sure? It's bloody cold out..." he reminded her. Maybe one of the other women had what she needed and they could both forgo heading out into the cold to get it. Maybe she would even play catch with him instead of him having to play by himself again. That'd be nice. It wasn't Pyramid, but it'd do.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 05:35 pm UTC (link)
Jenny laughed easily as he realized what she had wanted him to think she meant. It was easier than explaining to him exactly why she wanted to go out in the cold to get things for a shower. No guy ever understood the need to be clean the way a woman did. Her eyes twinkled as she nodded. "So you see why I need to go, don't you?"

Jenny wasn't a fan of the cold. In fact, she had stayed cooped up in the locked hallway of dressing rooms for hours when she felt like the walls were closing in because she didn't want to go out in her thin dress to find other people. If it hadn't been for the journals, she probably would have been dead on arrival of any sort of rescue crew. But then maybe whoever was holding them captive wouldn't have let her die. If they could pull her out of a hall and put her naked, asleep, next to a strange man, they could stop her doing away with herself.

Still, after further inspection of the dressing rooms she had come across some odd costume pieces that could protect her from the cold if she needed to be. A mohair bolero, apparently meant for some sort of Mexican senorita, a heavy felt horse's torso, something she wouldn't have recognized without the detachable head and ass she'd found beside it. And the padded clown's suit that she wouldn't wear unless the entire world was coming to an end if she didn't strap on that crappy thing and dance out into the snow. She'd chosen the mohair bolero and it was resting on the back of a broken theater chair someone had put in the hallway, probably to mend at some point.

"Of course, if you're really not going to help me, even when I need you, well..." She let her voice trail off with a gently disappointed pout forming on her face and she shook her head at Sid sadly.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 07:49 pm UTC (link)
Sid nodded, giving her another sheepish grin. "Right," he agreed albeit a bit awkwardly. Still, the idea of going out in the cold was less than desirable. Although, then again, he had heard that people were buddying up to keep from making themselves vulnerable just by being alone. Maybe she was just trying to keep herself safe.

...she wanted Sid to protect her? Sid of all people? She was going to be sorely disappointed, he thought, if she actually needed saving. Christ's sake, Sid had gotten his arse handed to him by a clique of chav girls while trying to defend Michelle. The memory put a small frown on his face. What kind of poof gets beaten to a pulp by a bunch of girls?

But then her words prodded him back to the present and Sid got to his feet at the sight of her pout. "No, no, right, sorry," he said quickly. "I wouldn't make you go out by yourself. They say it's dangerous...or...whatever..." he finished awkwardly. Bravado wasn't exactly Sid's forte. In fact, he probably sounded downright ridiculous to her. He sounded as such to himself, in any case. He picked up his jacket, then, and held it out to her. "You'll freeze out there," he said by way of explanation for the action. Without it, Sid would probably be the one to freeze, but he at least was still wearing a long sleeve shirt and jeans. They'd just...have to walk fast.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 07:58 pm UTC (link)
Jenny mulled over this idea again as she watched him, waited for him to make up his mind. It was really a bad thing that Shannon had to be right about needing a partner. She would much rather have had one of the large guys Shannon had mentioned there were a LOT of here. How was it possible that the only one available to her was barely old enough to vote, let alone drink. He was skiddish and nervous and very reluctant to help her even though she was obviously pretty enough for him to be flattered she'd pay attention to him. This was bordering on annoying and she was thinking about giving it up to grab her journal and plead with one of the big men to come help her when he seemed to come around.

"Oh no," she said, gently rejecting his offer of his jacket with a very appreciative smile. She touched the hand holding out the jacket and give it a little push back toward him. "I couldn't take your jacket. I can't have a frozen protector, can I?" She smiled sweetly at him, tilting her head and backing away two steps to reach into the hall and pull out the mohair bolero she'd found. "I'll wear this and you'll figure out how to get us out of here."

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 08:08 pm UTC (link)
At first, when she declined his offer, Sid looked at her incredulously in spite of the sly compliment hidden in the rejection of his gesture. But then she reached into the hall and pulled out what looked like a hairy sweater that was probably too short to be useful. She insisted she'd wear it and he just had to get them out. To him, it sounded like a stupid idea, because the thing didn't look all that warm - or attractive; what the fuck?! - to him, but he shrugged and put on his jacket. "Right, then," he agreed. "Come on, there's a window upstairs."

He walked past her with little bravado and less recognition, oblivious to the fact that he was probably being a bit rude by disregarding her as he went. The further up the stairs he went, the colder the air was and he wrapped his arms around himself reflexively when he got to the top. Sid started to continue forward without her, but paused and turned to wait for her, realizing that she was the whole point he was leaving the comfort of the small green room.

Then, he took the jacket off again, holding it out once more. "Least you can do is sit on it when you slide down the snowdrift," he insisted. It was the least he could do. If she turned it down, then he wouldn't offer again, but he'd feel like a right twat if he didn't at least offer and she got frostbite trying to slide down the bloody snow without a buffer zone between her legs and the built up precipitation.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 08:18 pm UTC (link)
Trying not to grin, Jenny bit her lip again with a sudden jolting reminder of pain that she was going to give herself a fat lip if she wasn't careful. But he was so amusingly adorable when he wanted to be. That lift of his nostril in disgust when he'd seen her scratchy idea of a coat made her want to laugh but she couldn't risk him thinking she was laughing at him derisively. That would just defeat her purpose. He wouldn't want to help her if he thought she was making fun of him.

He'd turned to walk away then and Jenny frowned at his retreating back. The room was full of junk, as she'd pointed out, and there was at least one useful thing he could have grabbed to help them. What he thought they would use to get down out of the window she wasn't sure but she wasn't going unprepared. Slinging the bolero over her shoulder, she hefted a smallish white board from the pile of stuff in the room, ignoring the sound of the dry erase markers snickering onto the floor as she whirled around to follow Sid up the stairs.

She was still climbing the stairs when he turned around to offer his jacket again, this time to sit on. "What about this instead?" she asked pleasantly, neatly hiding her desire to give him a withering look for being an idiot and making her do the work. Still he was going to go with her so she was going to be polite. She set the white board down and pulled the bolero around herself snugly with another smile at him. "Shall me?"

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 08:42 pm UTC (link)
With a facial shrug, Sid nodded when she asked about using a dry erase board - as a sled, he supposed. "Could do," he agreed. He couldn't; he'd probably break the bloody thing, but she was practically skin and bones, so he supposed it'd work for her. She then asked if they should go and he gave a half smile and nodded toward the direction in which they'd need to go.

This time, he waited for her and walked back toward the window out which he and Cheryl had smoked earlier that morning. "You're Jenny, yeah?" he asked, wanting to make sure and feeling a bit stupid that he even had to. When they reached the window, he pushed it open again and looked over at her. "You wanna go first or shall I?" He didn't want to presume, but he almost hoped she'd have him go first so he could make sure that bloody dry erase board didn't send her rogue or something. Not that Sid was awfully useful, because he wasn't, but at least he could try to catch her if it did.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 08:51 pm UTC (link)
"Could do?" Jenny immitated his accent playfully, forcing herself to continue to be pleasant even if it was making her mouth tighten and her eyes harden. It was an infinitesimal change in her expression but her shoulders were rigid now and her fingers were beginning to twitch with the need to curl into fists around the collar of his jacket and shake some sense into him. She was going and he was going to help her. So he'd better get with the program.

Instead, Jenny smiled coquettishly and nodded. "Jenny, yes. And you're Sid. Right? At least that's what I was told so I apologize if I got it wrong. It's a nice name, Sid," she added and toyed absently with the edge of his black skull cap. "I think we should go together, Sid. We'd be safest that way, wouldn't we?"

Jenny wasn't necessarily keen on getting on that white board and riding the snow drift down the side of the building. In fact, she was pretty sure there could be some kind of loose part in the snow and they could fall a hundred feet to their deaths. Which was why she wasn't going to think too much about it but she sure as hell wasn't going down by herself or sending him down first with the only thing she could think of to slide down the snow. What would Shane do now, she wondered and sighed.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 09:15 pm UTC (link)
Sid gave Jenny an apologetic grin. "Right, sorry...uh..." he paused to think of another way to say what he'd been thinking, since she was clearly American and for all he knew, the connotation she'd taken with his words was insulting when he hadn't meant for it to be. "I mean yeah, you could use that; that would work," he tried, giving her an awkward sort of hopeful glance. Maybe that was a better way to say it.

Nodding, Sid stiffened a little, even as his lips twitched toward a smile when she started to play with the beanie. Oh, yeah, she wanted him. She definitely wanted him. ...Cass wouldn't ever know, really, when he thought about it, but then he remembered how he hadn't thought she'd find out about a lot of things and she still had. Bollocks. "Sid, yeah," he replied with a goofy grin. "I think since it's daylight, we'd be all right either way, but however you want," he said with a shrug and a small smile. "I just thought if I went down first, I could catch you if that thing goes off course, or whatever," he added, nodding down at her dry erase board.

The real question in Sid's mind wasn't how they were going to get down, because either way, they'd get down. The question was how they were going to get back up...but he wasn't sure he should point that out at this point, because she seemed pretty dead set on going. They'd just have to figure something out.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 10:17 pm UTC (link)
All was well. Crisis averted. Jenny felt herself smile warmly, truthfully as Sid acquiesed. He was really putty in her hands, she decided. A small part of her rebelled against being so outright about using him and maybe she should get to know him and appreciate him more if he was to be the one "man" in this place to protect her. Even Max had been more awkward than Sid and Max had more reason to be. She'd tried her hardest to be good to Max. She could be good to Sid. Because Sid was helping her. Yes, that was it.

Sliding her finger along the edge of his hat, Jenny continued to smile at him. "I see your point, Sid, but what if you get down there and I have no way of following you because you've taken the board for yourself? Can't we just walk down?" She hadn't actually looked out the window herself and she knew for a fact that the strappy sandals she had arrived in would not be conducive to walking down snow banks but she pulled on a pair of boots she'd found in one of the dressing rooms and she felt certain she could go anywhere in them. Couldn't she?

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-12 10:50 pm UTC (link)
Sid continued to smile dumbly at her as she went on playing with the hat. "What? No, no..." he replied, loathe to shake his head and interrupt what she was doing, but unable to stop himself from the reflexive move. "I don't mean to use it. I'd break it," he laughed. Though he hadn't really considered the possibility of walking down the snowdrift. Mostly because he didn't entirely think it would support their weight anyway as it was just drift rather than actual accumulation. He shrugged. "I dunno about walking...'s a bit steep," he replied. "But if you wanna try..." he said, shrugging again and offering a sheepish grin.

Briefly, the idea of going to the petrol station all by himself crossed his mind, but then he remembered what exactly it was that she had wanted to go to retrieve and he thought better of making the offer. It wasn't that he was embarrassed to go to get feminine products - he was mortified by the idea, actually - but he knew nothing about that sort of thing and would probably fuck up. Sid always fucked up. But for whatever reason, Jenny seemed to be putting all her chips on the table for him to be her protector, so Sid didn't want to fuck up this time. Just this once, can you not be crap? he thought to himself. Just this once.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-12 11:10 pm UTC (link)
"Oh for the love of Grace Kelly," Jenny muttered and rolled her eyes. She'd reached the end of her patience but she wasn't pissed. Not yet at least. She just wasn't going to wait anymore because she wanted to go. She couldn't stand just sitting around and hoping something would happen. She made her own destiny and the world followed. That was how she'd managed to be producer of a film before the age of 30. And she'd already played the drama card. Look where that had gotten her! She'd ended up naked, on stage, with a strange man. So that was out. This was her last straw. The last hurrah. She flung open the window and looked down.

Sitting gingerly on the windowsill, she turned on her butt, sliding her legs out the window. The cold hit her immediately and she suddenly realized she had already been cold before getting this far. In fact, she'd been so focused on charming Sid into coming along with her that she hadn't noticed anything to do with cold until now. And now she was freezing. Teeth chattering, Jenny held onto the edge of the window frame and glanced back at Sid. "It would be nice if you came with but I will do it by myself if I have to. Just please get help if I appear to be dying."

With that, she blew a kiss over her shoulder at him and propelled herself out of the window. Only to land, three feet down, flat on her ass in snow beneath the window. "Fuck you, you fucking fuck!" she growled silently to herself.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-13 03:53 pm UTC (link)
Right, maybe she was getting upset with him after all. He knew that tone. Michelle used it a lot; so did Jal. Usually attached to the words, "fuck's sake, Sid." His brow furrowed reflexively and he looked down ashamedly as she pulled open the window all by herself and sat down on the window sill. So much for not being useless and crap for this woman. He looked up again only when she spoke and his brow furrowed further as she blew a kiss at him and out the window she went. "...fuck," he muttered and pulled the coat in more tightly around himself before following her out with about as much grace as she had managed.

Looking over at her, Sid pulled himself to his feet and reached out to help her up, but he didn't touch her, in case she didn't want his assistance. He'd had moments like that; had Cass or Michelle or Jal smack his hand away with disinterest and he didn't want Jenny to do the same. "All right...?" he asked quietly.

The wind whipped across Sid's face and the snow actually seemed to be pelting him rather than simply falling and he felt really badly. She had to be freezing her nips off. And there wasn't a bloody thing he could do about it, because he'd pissed her off and she hadn't wanted his coat. Actually, speaking of which, Sid pulled his journal out of one of his pockets and flipped to the dog-eared page with the map on it. He was a bit disoriented for direction with the snow coming down the way it was, but after looking and refreshing his memory, he closed the journal and put it back in his coat. He was ready whenever Jenny was.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-13 04:14 pm UTC (link)
Jenny had the urge to ball her hands into fists to pound the wet snow and kick her feet. Of course, throwing a tantrum was not exactly the image she wanted to leave Sid with. No, impressions counted for a lot. The outward appearance of calm could almost always produce a much better response than looking like a complete and utter idiot. So, rather than fume for more than it took Sid to flop into the snow beside her, thankfully not landing directly on her, she smiled graciously instead.

She brushed the snow from her now cold, red palms and took Sid's offered hand with as much alacrity as she could muster without seeming to be overly jubilant to have fallen into a snow drift, requiring even more help than originally planned. She was glad he was somewhat solid and able to easily lift her to her feet. She didn't stand up fluidly or prettily but at least she didn't fall back down on her ass.

"Thank you," she said sweetly between chattering teeth. She didn't let go right away but rather snuggled in close to him for warmth, partially hiding her face against his shirt to get it out of the snow. All of which was for necessity because she'd ceased trying to pour on the charm the moment she'd realized how bad her idea had been to come out here in this.

She waited patiently as he used his arm in spite of her being firmly attached. Nosily she looked over his shoulder without shame but he only looked at a map which seemed to be the town they had been in before the snow had transformed it into a mess of white on white impressionism.

"I think you were right to try to talk me out of coming out here, Sid. But since we're out, we might as well go, right?"

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-13 05:49 pm UTC (link)
Women were confusing. They really, really were. One minute, Sid was pretty sure that Jenny had wanted to clock him and now she was snuggling up against him and thanking him for having helped her to her feet. Granted, it was cold and that probably had a lot to do with her clinginess, but still...if she was really as upset with him as he'd thought she was, she'd probably have found another way to keep warm. ...like going back the fuck indoors.

And then she admitted that it was a dumb idea for them to have come out and it was Sid's turn to be frustrated, although he tried very hard not to show it. It wasn't her fault that she really needed feminine products. Although it is her bloody fault she couldn't be bothered to ask one of the other girls if they had anything first, he thought. Trek out in the snow for tampons, Sid. Oh, please, could I? Some things never fucking change...

Instead of replying with the "I told you so" that he felt was completely meritted, Sid just reached up with his free arm and scratched the back of his head. "Right," he agreed. "Come on, then, it's up the road this way, yeah?" he went on, nodding in the direction of the petrol station, according to the map. He'd found that the map had been at least as accurate as getting him from the petrol station to where he was currently, so obviously it was equally as accurate in the other direction.

Taking his arm out of her grasp, Sid put his arm around her shoulders, instead, unsure whether it'd be a welcome gesture or even if it would be at all helpful, but the way he was feeling right now, he almost didn't care, either way. If she wanted to push him away or deck him, fine; she could walk to the fucking petrol station alone. If, on the other hand, it was a welcome gesture, fine; it would be his good deed for the day.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-14 12:00 am UTC (link)
Okay so maybe Sid wasn't exactly what Shannon had been talking about when she'd told Jenny there were a lot of big men here in Vas Captio who could protect and take care of her. So maybe Sid was a lot younger and reluctant and really really British. He hadn't given up on her. He was helping and she was very grateful. All thoughts of manipulating him had left her mind as he rose to the task and slid his arm around her shoulder to help her down the snow.

And since she was being honest and admitting things like the fact he'd been right to try to stop her, she decided to come clean with Sid. She hoped that even though they were already at least a quarter of the way down the tundra that was the side of the theater, he wouldn't drop her right there and then and hike back up into the building. She was so fucking restless and this was a lot more fun than she'd had in a very long time. Even if he was 10 years younger, he was interesting. Yes, at the very least he was interesting. Another male with an accent and a kind of chivalry. She had to admit she was fortunate.

"Sid, please try to find it within yourself, dig deep. I don't really need feminine products. I, well, ah. I need to take a shower. Get clean, you know?" she said softly, her face close to his ear, still trying to block out the snow and keep warm. She fought the desire to nuzzle her nose under his ear to see if he would forgive her purely for that but she was too cold and her nose was numb now. Worthless.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-14 12:28 am UTC (link)
As they reached the bottom of the drift and Sid managed, however clumsily, to stay on his feet and keep her on hers, Jenny addressed him and he looked down at her as she spoke. ...and blinked. She didn't really need feminine products and she'd talked him into leaving the warmth and safety of the theater for--

Oh... Her face was so close to his ear that he could feel her warm breath against his skin and she was saying that she'd talked him into taking her out in the cold because she wanted a shower. A shower. The implication he was getting from her having insisted he come along as well as her current body language was that she wanted him to come with her. And normally, he'd have jumped on the chance, but there was Cass to think about. She wasn't here, but he was trying, trying to behave himself.

But, Jenny was pretty and older and flush against him - whether to keep warm or because she wanted to be, he wasn't sure. Chris's on and off thing with Angie flashed into Sid's head and since he'd already felt guilty about Chris's death earlier in the day when he'd been contemplating the whole enabling thing with Cheryl's smoking, he thought maybe he wouldn't mind it if he could make Chris proud in the same day. Sid's body was already reacting to her and Cass had left him.

"Shower?" he asked, his voice cracking as he stalled. "Er...shower, yeah. In the gym, yeah?" he said quickly, trying to cover his own awkwardness. He pulled the journal out again and looked for the gym on the map. Bit longer walk, but if he was about to take a shower with a pretty older woman, he was pretty sure he could handle that. He gave her a lopsided, dopey grin and took a few steps in the right direction.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-14 12:45 am UTC (link)
Jenny glanced over at Sid's face and waited for him to make up his mind about the whole thing. She was actually holding her breath as they tromped through the wet, smushy snow that probably could have sucked them down in like an avalanche. It felt like a miracle when they reached the bottom and she was practically in Sid's pockets by that point because she did not want to be left behind in a pile of snow because she hadn't been completely honest with him.

She muffled a giggle against his shoulder as his voice cracked. Yes, it was pretty unbelievable that she would want to brave the icy winds and wet snow to go have an equally cold shower. Still, being clean was one thing she wasn't prepared to sacrafice because of some asshole who thought he could collect pretty people and watch them squirm. Snow or no snow she was going to be clean.

"I know," she said quietly into his ear. "It's crazy but you'll get me there, right? You're so kind to have helped me this far," she added with an extra does of pleasant suggestion. Maybe letting go of manipulation so soon had been a bad idea. She felt like this idea was going the way of the dodo and maybe Sid was going to need more convincing. Maybe...

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-14 01:01 am UTC (link)
It was not uncomfortable, however slightly unfamiliar to have someone clinging to him quite as much as Jenny was, as he walked. Normally, if anyone was clinging to him, it was Cass...and she was fucking him at the time. So, to say that walking would've been a bit awkward for him given the current position would've been pretty accurate. Adding in the snow, which was well up his calves as he tromped through it, it was even more difficult.

Sid tried to ignore the way his jeans suddenly felt a lot tighter and the fact that his bollocks were practically pulsing in anticipation, the more she spoke into his ear. His eyes closed only to open again half-lidded as they walked. "Course," he replied with a tentative grin. Course I'll take you to the showers; I could use the cold water right about now if you're pulling a Chelle, he found himself thinking, although he refused to allow himself to say out loud, even if only because then he'd have to explain to her what exactly 'pulling a Chelle' meant.

"All right?" he asked after a short pause. He was trying to move quickly - partially because it was bloody cold outside and partially because the sooner he got her to the shower, the sooner he'd get to see her naked which was admittedly awesome. But his speed of movement might not have been her idea of a suitable pace. She might've wanted to take it slower so that the movements weren't so awkward against the snow they were walking through, for all he knew. At least he'd thought to ask; for that, he was proud of himself.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-15 03:45 pm UTC (link)
Jenny felt transported back to all the horrible midwestern winters that she had so avidly hated when she was younger. Of course, they'd never had this much snow but it had been enough so that when she arrived in Los Angeles where the weather never changed, she had been so happy to never see another white flake unless it was on a ski slope. And even then she'd only gone to a ski resort for Shane's wedding that never was. Needless to say she wasn't interested in or enjoying the cold. In fact, she was pretty sure this was the stupidest idea she'd ever had but she was definitely not letting Sid know she just wanted to go back inside now.

So, tripping on her own snow-clumped feet and hanging on to Sid for dear life, she pressed her mouth closer to his ear so that he could hear her squeak out an answer to his question. "I'm fine. Never better!" she said and huddled closer to him. This was insufferable but at least he didn't smell like a gym locker. He must have managed not to sweat like a dog during his time here. She appreciated that very much right at the moment.

Turning her face only a little she tried to make out the world around them. It was all so white that she couldn't tell if they'd gotten to the bottom of the drift against the theater or if they were on a long descent into hell. In normal circumstances this would have annoyed her but right now she was keen on her face not freezing.

"How much further?" she asked into his ear and immediately wanted to kick herself in the ass because as she'd done it her eyelashes had fluttered against his cheek. If that wasn't a come on, almost nothing was, but she hadn't meant to do it. She really hoped his face was so numb that he hadn't felt it. Oh please, oh please, oh please... she thought.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-15 10:35 pm UTC (link)
It seemed like it was taking forfuckingever to get from point A to point B and as much as Sid liked the attention Jenny was giving him, as well as the self-importance and ego boost acquired from the way she was hanging on him, he was good and well ready to get to the stupid gym so that they could get down to business and get the hell out of the snow. He was glad to hear that she was doing all right, even if he was sure she was lying - the way she huddled closer still to him being a dead giveaway that she was freezing her arse off as well and probably more so than he was.

Squinting against the way the sun glared off the pristine snow, Sid could just barely make out the gym ahead of them and just as he was about to point it out in an effort to make her feel a bit better, she asked how much further. ...and batted her eyelashes against his cheek in the process. Oh, bollocks... he thought to himself, feeling the heat rise to his face as he shifted awkwardly in an effort to relieve some of the tension in his jeans just then. Couldn't she wait until they were closer? This was murder on the libido, it was...

"Just up there," he choked out, pointing with his free hand. They had a little ways to go, but it was only maybe a two minute walk, by his best guess. It just seemed like further, he thought, because of the snow and the way his feet felt like icicles in his sneakers, for all the melting snow that had leaked in as they walked. His nose was completely numb and probably red as Rudolph's and just thinking about it made him sniffle and wrinkle it to try and get some blood circulation there to warm it up. She'd better not be having him on, not after this. It was miserable out here and he really, really hoped she was going to make it worth his while. What Cass didn't know wouldn't hurt her. Probably.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-18 10:14 pm UTC (link)
"Just up there" meant absolutely nothing to Jenny since her face was pressed against him but she didn't say anything. She almost couldn't talk at all at this point. Her lips felt numb and she wasn't sure she could feel the tips of her fingers anymore either. She was so fucking cold that - oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Why hadn't she thought of this sooner? It was so cold that she could not walk out here with wet hair. Not a chance. And what was she going to do when she was done taking the shower? Wait there until her hair dried? No fucking way. It took forever for her long hair to dry and she knew it. Oh but there was no way she was going to ask Sid to turn around now. She'd already been set against it but now she was dead set. She was going to have to go through with this and take her chances. See what happened and work with it. How could she have been so stupid?

"Ohhh!" she whined against his ear as she felt herself beginning to shiver horribly. She was all but jerking, knocking her hip into him and trying not to wonder at what point her arms might freeze around him permanently. "Hurry up!" she moaned and tried to walk faster but her legs felt like lead and her feet were blocks of ice so numb she would have been tripping over them if Sid hadn't been supporting most of her body weight by now. Her mind swam with frustration with herself for having gotten herself into this mess.

Jennifer Schecter, thou art an ass. She closed her eyes then. She knew that it meant Sid had to do most of the work but she didn't care anymore. She was so cold, so stupid. She wanted to say she was sorry and that they should turn around but all her lips would make was a puff of warm air against his ear and a soft, almost inaudible," Mrfff erffy."

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-19 11:34 am UTC (link)
Being whined at and told to hurry up when he was all but dragging dead weight alongside himself didn't make Sid any more inclined to speed up then he already was from the cold. Why did she want to take a cold shower in this weather, anyway; was she completely mad? He wasn't getting in there, that was for sure. If she wanted to fuck him, he was all for it, but he was definitely not taking a shower to get there.

So, rather than snap back that he was going as fast as he could, all things considered, Sid just kept moving forward, shuddering against the contrasting cold against the side to which Jenny hadn't attached herself like a barnacle. The gym as a few yards ahead; Sid paused briefly in his effort to catch his breath and wondered if it might be bloody easier if he just took off his coat, gave it to her, and had her hop up for a piggyback ride so that her weight would be evenly distributed...

"Sorry?" he asked, furrowing his brow slightly when she spoke again. He barely heard her as it was but he definitely had no idea what she'd said. Sid took off his coat and put it around her shoulders, frustrated. "Get up," he said, bending his knees slightly as he turned his back on her. "I can't bloody keep walking faster when you're hanging on one side; it's setting me off balance. You can ride on my back so I can get there faster," he said, frowning to himself. Take me out in the snow for an ice shower, Sid. Sure thing, Jenny, right away! Fuck.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-24 10:47 pm UTC (link)
Normally, Jenny would have protested and threatened her way out of having to climb on someone's back to be carried. She could fucking get there or die trying. But being in the actual situation where she might actually die trying was a whole new playing field for her. Nothing in her life had prepared her for this and she was so beyond normal capabilities that she was nearly half dead as it was. So cold. She was so fucking cold and he was not much warmer but it was better than nothing.

With his coat around her shoulders and so little of an idea as to how it had gotten there because her mind was milky, syrupy and slow now, she gripped his shoulders. He would have to do the rest because she couldn't. Leaning herself against him she knew somewhere inside her fogged, stupid brain, that she was probably giving him the show of a lifetime with the way her nipples were hard and flush against his back. It didn't seem to matter though because she was half asleep.

In fact, it was so nice and sleepy that she almost yawned near his ear. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. Her body shutting down just felt like a slow descent into naptime. She could almost feel the gentle touch of her Egyptian cotton sheets. 500+ thread count. So warm. So wonderful. And Nikki was there. Oh Nikki. "I love you so much."

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-26 06:43 pm UTC (link)
Sid could tell that Jenny wasn't going to heft herself up on his back, whether because she didn't want to or simply couldn't, though, he couldn't tell for sure. In any case, he reached back and hooked his arms around her legs so that his elbows were holding her weight under her knees. "All right, Jenny," he said quietly, feeling a bit badly for her that she was apparently so very stubborn that even though she was freezing - however numb Sid was, he could still feel her nipples erect against his back, even though his two layers of shirts - she wasn't willing to give up.

Thankfully, though, the gym was right in front of him and Sid was struggling to pull the door open against the snow on the ground as he felt her go completely limp on his back. Trying to hold her up, keep his jacket from falling off her, and get the door open was proving to be more difficult than he thought it was probably worth for a show he was pretty sure he wasn't going to get anymore, but he finally got the door open and had gotten as far as pulling the door closed behind them once inside when he heard her speak again.

"Sorry?" he asked, if only because he thought he'd heard her say she loved him so much but that didn't make any bloody sense and anyhow, her voice was quiet and interrupted by the sound of teh door closing. He carried her on his back over to the nearest set of pulled out bleachers and carefully lowered her to sit on them. When he turned toward her, he realized that there was probably something very wrong with her...and Sid tried very hard not to panic. Not again. I don't want another death to be my fault.

Jenny was showing signs of what Sid was pretty sure was hypothermia, given the circumstance. "Right, okay, wake up, Jenny," he said quickly, taking a seat beside her and pulling her into a tight hug, holding the coat in place with one hand and rubbing the other hand harsh and fast up and down on her back to try and create friction heat. "You know...you could've just said we could go back," he tried to joke to lighten the situation a little.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-27 07:34 pm UTC (link)
Vaguely, Jenny felt herself being lifted up and carried and suddenly she was eight years old again. Daddy had her on his back for a piggyback to bed. It was so nice and swimmy and warm here with Daddy. Her hair feel in her face and she giggled softly because silly Daddy was just making it so hard for her to stay sleepy. He was jostling her around and tossing her up and down so that she lost her tummy somewhere between the couch and the bed. She kept waiting to feel herself be lowered onto the softness of her bed so she could curl up tight with little Glo-Worm and Piglet. It had been such a long day.

Other thoughts and memories swam through her thick mind. She felt so warm and loved. Something that, if she had been completely conscious, would have made her a little sad because she hadn't felt that in such a long time. Her arms locked around the closest person she saw in the meandering of a party with balloons and cake and pinata full of her favorite chocolate covered marshmallows. She was kissing everyone she knew and it was so wonderful. Dreamy and beautiful.

"Wow!" she said in a small, sleepy voice and yawned. "It's so pretty. Daddy you made it so pretty. I love you so much." And Daddy hugged her tight which sent a surge of fear through her somewhere in the back of her mind. It didn't feel as warm anymore either. In fact, the party was beginning to fade into the background slowly like the pinwheel of a memory being rewound in one of those low-budget old black and white films. "No...." she whispered. "Don't go..."

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-29 09:49 pm UTC (link)
Sid's brow furrowed at Jenny's words. What the sodding hell was she talking about?! Was hallucination part of hypothermia? Shit, he wished he had his journal to ask; there was a doctor about, he thought. Although, then Jenny yawned and Sid was pretty sure that was a bad sign. "Oi, c'mon, stop it," he said, frowning, pulling her closer and moving his other hand so that both were rubbing furiously up and down her back beneath his coat. You dragged me out here; like hell you're going into cold shock when I don't bloody know what to do with you, he thought with a flash of anger that he immediately felt guilty for having.

"Jenny, wake up, hey?" he said. "We'll warm you up and I'll carry you back to the theatre; it's warmer there and whether you like it or not, no shower for you."

This was uncomfortable. Beside the fact that she was freezing and now he was even colder still for clinging to her to try and warm her up, he didn't know what he should be doing. Didn't know if he was helping or hindering; didn't know if it was wise or stupid to take her back out in the awful weather to go back to the theatre where there were curtains and costumes she could use to help herself stay warm. Here, there was nothing of use for that sort of thing.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-05-29 10:29 pm UTC (link)
Daddy looked so much like Nikki now that Jenny was practically crying. "No, please!" she whined and reached out. Her hands grasped at pretty, pretty Nikki and she purred softly, sleepily as Nikki massaged her back. Her eyes were closed and she couldn't even begin to want to open them. Whatever was happening, she liked it even if the daydreaminess of the moment had begun to fade. This was beautiful. It was better than anything she'd expected.

"No, I don't want to wake up," she murmured and snuggled her face into his neck. "I don't need a shower yet." Nuzzling beneath Nikki's ear with her nose, she began kissing softly. "Mmm, you smell so good." How had Nikki managed to smell so ... well it wasn't exactly good if she was honest. But still this was Nikki and she would have taken anything to nothing now that that whole nightmare was over. That stupid pretty people collection.

Kissing more fervently, Jenny made her way along Nikki's soft, pretty cheek to her mouth and kissed Nikki hungrily. It felt different though and Jenny was so sleepy. "What's the matter?" she asked in between kisses. "Do I have morning breath?"

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-05-29 11:17 pm UTC (link)
Blinking, Sid raised his eyebrows. ...she was kissing his neck. She was kissing his neck. "I smell like sweat and pudding," he replied, frowning. She really was far gone... Although, he couldn't help shifting uncomfortably again as she made her way toward his face with her lips.

Oh, no. No, no. It'd been all well and bloody good when he'd been thinking about it on the way over here, but no. No. There was Cass. He had Cass and if he--

Sid's eyes widened and he stiffened when she kissed him hard and hungry on the mouth. For a second, he didn't really know how to react to that. He should definitely stop her, though. Yeah, except that he couldn't make himself move to do it.

"No," he replied to her question, though, brought back into himself at the sound of her voice and the break in her kiss. "Stop it, c'mon, I've got a girlfriend," he said, frowning as he craned his neck back to pull away from her.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-01 02:27 pm UTC (link)
Jenny was beginning thaw some, which unfairly made her feel the cold. She snuggled into Nikki and didn't seem to notice the statement about smelling like sweat and pudding. Nikki wouldn't smell like that.

"I'm your girlfriend, silly," she answered and giggled. Her eyelids felt so heavy and hear mind was one big fuzzy blur right now. Nikki didn't sound right though. She sounded like she had a bad frog in her throat. Jenny opened her eyes and blinked a few times furiously against the cold and light on the other side.

She had stopped to ask about morning breath while inches from Nikki's face and she could still feel the warmth of Nikki's breath even though it was obvious Nikki had moved away. Blinking again a few times, Jenny realized what the problem was instantly. Her teeth chattering, she almost passed out in surprise.

"Ohhh," she moaned. "Where is Nikki? Why is it so cold?" She flopped down onto Sid's lap, exhausted and feeling fragile. At least she wasn't as cold as before, she supposed. Still, why couldn't she go back to the warm, warm illusion she'd been in moments ago?

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-01 02:45 pm UTC (link)
Sid scrunched his face in confusion and frustration. He wasn't getting through to her and he didn't know what else to do short of giving her a slap on the face, which he couldn't bring himself to do probably even if she actually needed it. Sid didn't hit girls. He got the shit kicked out of him by loads of them but he didn't ever hit back. It wasn't right.

"No, you're really not..." he replied awkwardly, shaking his head. He wished she was. He wished she was Cass; Cass would make this place so much better... But she wasn't. She was a pretty woman who was completely mad. And maybe he would've if not for Cass, but he wasn't going to take advantage of it.

It seemed, though, that Jenny had finally realized what was going on and he gave her a sympathetic smile. "Nicky?" he asked. That was a poof name if he ever heard one. Poor bloke... Sid rested a hand absently on Jenny's head, stroking her hair reflexively the way he did for Cass whenever she would flop into his lap the same way. "All right, Jenny...?" he asked almost reluctantly.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-01 03:16 pm UTC (link)
Jenny's mind swam and she shuddered, pulling her arms and legs in around herself and pressing closer to Sid. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice shivery and tense as though she might shatter into a million pieces right there and then. Not for at least two years had her mind closed down like that and gone into such pure fantasy.

"Yes, Nikki. She's my girlfriend. Outside of this hell hole, pretty people collection." She almost paused as she said pretty people because in her opinion, Sid wasn't exactly pretty. What did it hurt to stroke his ego a little though since she had been coming on to him a few moments ago. Not that he was ugly either. He was very adorable in a kid brother sort of way. Though she felt a certain funny draw to him now that she'd kissed him.

Quietly, she asked, "What's her name? Your girlfriend?" He was playing with her hair and she closed her eyes, tears leaking frostily down her cheeks and onto his shirt. This was the worst place in the world and she had no fucking way of getting out or doing anything remotely normal in here. She wished someone she knew was here. Someone she could crumble into who would understand and not judge her or make her feel like an idiot about it.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-01 03:29 pm UTC (link)
Girlfriend? Fuck, that changed everything and now Sid felt badly for...well, everything, really, that had been going through his mind. "Pretty people?" Sid laughed. "Think I might be in the wrong bloody nightmare, then," he joked. Although, he did have to agree that most of the people he'd met could probably be considered as such.

Jenny asked for Cass's name and his hand stilled on the side of her head. "Cassie," he replied with a small, fond smile tugging at his lips. He resumed the stroking of Jenny's hair figuring it was better if she was calm and warm again before he suggested for a second time that he take her back to the theatre. "How long have you been with yours?" he asked, trying to make conversation.

He wondered if this was what Tony felt like. That night when Effy had overdosed and he and Sid himself had had to get her to the hospital. The whole protective thing. It wasn't really Sid's thing normally, but he felt badly for Jenny. She missed someone, too; she knew how he felt. There was some sort of bonding going on there, he thought maybe, even if it was over something so miserable. Maybe Sid had just made another friend out of this bloody mess.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-01 03:44 pm UTC (link)
Jenny opened her eyes when Sid's hand stopped against her hair. She peeked up at him, only able to see the underside of his chin from where her face was half-hidden against him. He sounded like the thought of Cassie comforted him the same way thinking about Nikki had kept her from going too far over the edge. When he started playing with her hair again, she closed her eyes once more, trying to take deep breaths without it being too obvious. She didn't want him to know she was crying or he might get weirded out. It was to his credit that he hadn't gotten angry with her for that little episode. The stress here was so phenomenal though that she wasn't sure how much more she could take without completely folding.

"That's a pretty name," she said softly and brushed tears from his shirt with her cold and trembling fingers. "I haven't been with Nikki long but I love her. I know I do." She sniffled without realizing she was doing it and sighed shakily. Without thinking about it really, she put her arms around Sid's middle in a sort of awkward way because of the angle she was at. Clinging to him she shook with the effort not to cry out loud. When was this going to be over? This fucking nightmare?

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-01 04:00 pm UTC (link)
A small smile crossed Sid's lips and he nodded. He thought Cass's name was pretty, too. "She's beautiful," he replied absently. "I know that feeling; I haven't been with Cass that long, either, but I know I love her, too," he replied even though Jenny hadn't asked.

Sid wondered what the people who brought them all here had hoped to gain by taking people away from the ones they loved back home. Anders had a wife; he and Jenny had girlfriends. It was safe to assume that they weren't alone in their loss, he thought. If they were trying to break people down, they'd have to try harder with Sid. He was going to stay strong and determined. As soon as he got out of here, he'd find Cass again; no one was going to stop him from doing that.

Jenny, maybe, was not as determined. Sid felt her hug him from an awkward angle and he could hear as well as see - when he looked down at her finally - that she was crying. His head bowed slightly and he thought of Jal at Chris's funeral. This wasn't exactly the same, but for the time being, it also wasn't terribly different. "All right, Jenny," he whispered, brushing a stray hair away from her face when it stuck to her tear tracks. "We'll see 'em again, yeah? You have to keep thinking that or you'll go bloody mad."

Even as he said it, though, he could feel himself breaking down a little. He'd hold it in and be the strong one, because that was what that bloke's role was...but Sid was hurting, too. The sooner they got out of this place, the better. He was going to keep holding to hope that it'd be sooner than later.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-02 09:43 am UTC (link)
Jenny, not so much by nature but by conditioning and hardening herself after so much horror and unhappiness in her past, was more of a taker than a giver. It hadn't crossed her mind to ask him if he loved Cassie or anything else beyond what she'd asked just to keep herself from crying. She really didn't want to hear about how his girlfriend. She wanted her own here and now.

She was glad he didn't decide to expound because she couldn't have stood it right now. Everything else weighing her down was crushing her spirit. It was all she could do to hang onto him and not spiral down into her fantasy world again as, much to her own embarrassment, she had done a few minutes ago.

She also wasn't determined to do anything but survive even if just barely and not necessarily all the time either. Here or outside in the real world. It was a tooth and nail struggle for her some days. Especially when things conspired to break her down. Like Marina destroying her life just for the fun of it because Marina was bored while her girlfriend was away in Italy. Or finding out Carmen had only been with her to be closer to Shane. It had taken a lot for her to hold her head up those days and no one had taken care of her. She'd had to take care of herself when all she really wanted was for someone to hold together the pieces.

Sid was going to have to do right now. But he was at least willing and Jenny could really appreciate that. In fact, when he looked down at her and said they'd see their girlfriends again, she wiped her eyes then caught his face with one palm and kissed his cheek. "You are very sweet, Sid. Thank you. I don't think I deserve to see Nikki again. Maybe this is purgatory after all." She looked away, pressing her cheek against his stomach again.

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-02 12:12 pm UTC (link)
Sid gave Jenny a small, perfectly practice smile that he neither meant nor felt, not that she'd be any the wiser, when she kissed his cheek and suggested that perhaps they were in purgatory. Maybe he'd died in a plane crash or something and the whole of what he'd seen of New York City was part of this limbo; he had only seen Times Square and the airport...both things he'd seen in the movies, so they weren't unfamiliar sights.

If this was purgatory, he would never see Cass again. He was sure of it. Maybe it was becasue he'd stood so idly by while Chris was essentially killing himself. Maybe if he'd stepped up and said, 'Oi, mate...no more spliff,' Chris wouldn't have died and Sid wouldn't be here. That, of course, was completely untrue. No matter what Sid could've said, Chris was his own person. He'd have done things the exact same way, regardless. If Jal hadn't been able to stop him - and Sid had to assume she'd tried - then there was no bloody way Sid would've been able.

"I can't let myself think that's what this is," he finally said, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath that he let out very slowly. His eyes opened again and he looked out at the wall in front of him, going back to stroking Jenny's hair absently and reflexively when she laid back down. "I don't think you should think of it like that, either. I think it's just a bad bloody dream, hey? We'll wake up soon, Jenny, and you'll have Nikki and you won't ever have to see me or this sodding place again, yeah?"

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-02 03:09 pm UTC (link)
She almost wanted to reassure Sid that when they did get out of here that she would miss him. It seemed like the automatic response that almost popped out of her mouth when he said she'd never have to see him again. He was so nice and very sweet to soothe her, playing with her hair and telling her it was going to be okay. That soon this would all look like a bad dream.

Except she couldn't honestly say she'd miss him. Momentarily she felt a twinge of guilt for that. Maybe if she hadn't hardened herself and done so many vengeful things she wouldn't be here either. Maybe she would have been a person who could say she'd miss this person who had, in all reality, risked his life and saved hers to bring her for a shower. Instead she felt numb.

She would miss nothing and no one here. Just like no one was missing her back at home. Even Nikki, the beautiful and talented celebrity, had moved on. She was sure of it. That's how her life worked. She never got it quiet right. Just wanted people to love her but couldn't figure out how to love them back. At least, not in a way that made them want to stay.

The twinge of guilt grew. Sid here with her had shown her more kindness than anyone she'd known. And in just an hour where others had had a lifetime. Including her parents. She couldn't disregard him because he wasn't high fashion or gorgeous or whatever it was that she'd chalked against him. He was taking care of her.

"Oh Sid," she whispered, feeling like a complete asshole and knowing he had no idea what sort of war had been raging in her mind over the past few minutes of silence. "I'm sorry I dragged you out here. I am so sorry."

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-02 07:46 pm UTC (link)
Right. Now she was sorry. That figured, didn't it? She was sorry after she made him leave the warm green room and after he had to carry her after dragging her at his side. Now she was sorry after she had some kind of hallucination or mental bloody breakdown or whatever. Now she was sorry. Fat lot of good that was at this juncture, wasn't it?

Taking a deep breath and letting it out in a sigh, Sid shook his head. "Don't mention it," he replied in a low, bored voice, staring still at the wall as if expecting at any moment for something to happen there. "All right?" he asked, looking down at her again. "So we can get back? Still bloody cold in here," he said.

All Sid wanted to do was go back to the sodding theatre, go back down to the green room, and commence throwing his ball against the wall. Beat the hell out of sitting on a half-broken bleacher, courtesy of he and Anders, in the cold, trying to keep Jenny warm and comforted when he felt neither of those things for himself. While he didn't want things to be worse for her than they already were, a small part of him was angry that she didn't seem to care that she'd made things worse for him than they were...at least not until just then.

Sid was never really very good at the whole comforting thing. Usually if someone came to him for comforting, really all they wanted was to fuck him and not because he was Sid, but because he wasn't whomever they were angry with at the time. Jenny clearly didn't want to have sex with him and, at this point, he didn't want to sleep with her, either. So, Sid was at a loss of how to make her feel better and, well...he sort of decided he'd like to go back, now.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-02 09:50 pm UTC (link)
Some part of her realized just how badly she had fucked this up. Because suddenly she cared what Sid was thinking and how much she'd managed to put him in danger. It was really late in the game to be seeing it all and she knew it. There was nothing she could do about it either. He hadn't changed much in demeanor but he wasn't all that engaged when he was talking to her now. In fact, he sounded like he was tolerating her now. She knew that tone better than anything.

Slowly, she unfolded herself from around him and pulled herself to her feet. She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling very small and very helpless. She couldn't take back what she'd done and it was the same story all over again. Seeing it too late when she was on the path toward fucking up a potential friendship.

She wiped her eyes with the edges of the mohair bolero sleeves and sniffled. Her eyes burned with new tears threatening to fall and she looked away from Sid at the room around them. "Go ahead back, Sid. Don't worry about me. I'll stay until it's warmer so that you don't have to try to carry me. Because I know I'll get deathly cold again." She was definitely shivering now because she was away from his core of warmth. Her teeth chattered but she kept looking away from him toward the doorway into the hall leading to the locker rooms. Or at least that was what she figured was down there.

"Thank you... I'm sorry," she said, glancing once over her shoulder before walking away. What else could she do?

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[info]emo_underdog
2009-06-02 09:58 pm UTC (link)
When Jenny got to her feet and then told him to go on without her, Sid furrowed his brow. But, he wanted to go back and she was telling him to go. Plus, she was wanting him to go without her which meant he could move faster. Right, then.

"Right, okay," he replied with a shrug. It wasn't a new thing for Sid to be dismissed and, in this case, he certainly didn't mind. It was bloody cold in here and he wanted to get back to the theatre. If she didn't want to come, then she didn't want to come. He wasn't going to beg her. He could hear her sniffling and that meant either she was going to get sick from the horrible weather or she was crying. If she was crying, it was definitely time for Sid to go. He didn't do well with crying women or girls. The fuck was he supposed to say to make her feel better? If it was Cass, he usually knew at least what to try, but Jenny was a stranger and he had no idea where to begin. Better, then, if he just didn't bother.

"You're welcome. 's all right. Stay warm, yeah?" he asked as he started away in the opposite direction. "See you 'round, Jenny," he added. "Feel better."

With that, Sid put his coat back on and pulled it around himself tightly before heading back out into the snow.

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[info]dont_f_withme
2009-06-02 10:03 pm UTC (link)
"See you 'round," he said and Jenny turned toward him, her mouth open to say something else. Maybe reach out and ask for what she needed. Her voice caught in her throat when she saw he was actually leaving. She'd wanted him to leave. She didn't want to keep him there on her account and he should leave. He shouldn't have to stay.

An overwhelming sense of loneliness filled her then as she watched him go back outside. Sinking slowly to the ground, Jenny sat on the cold floor of the gym. She hugged her knees against her chest and set her cheek on the tops of them.

"Goodbye, Sid," she whispered and closed her eyes.

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