"SINNERS! You have given into discretion and temptation for far too long! The forest responds in kind! You share your bounties with the Outlanders, the forest reclaims! You share your livestock with the Outlanders, the forest reclaims! Beware if you choose to breed with the Outlanders, for you shall not wish to see that reclaimed as well!"
The spindly mage, himself covered in vines and moss, leaned heavily against his staff as he howled these declarations at anyone who would listen. Currently, the only person in his presence was a seven-and-a-half foot tall god who had his arms crossed and was staring at the old man with something akin to smoldering boredom - which is surprisingly possible.
"Listen to what I say, giant, you-"
"Shut up."
"You forf-"
"No."
"I am trying to-"
"You are succeeding in testing my patience." Kratos adjusted the axe slung over his shoulder as if to accentuate the point and glared at the old mage, though he spared a glance to see who was approaching to join the audience. He could hear the footsteps. And the happy humming.
All Jester had been out to do was find new wonders in the forest to sketch. She’d continued keeping a visual diary of sorts of her escapades in Vallo just as she had in Wildemount and, though her current sketchbook was beginning to be full to bursting, she never stopped looking for something to draw. She’d thought she’d been alone but, as she took another step further into the forest, she began to hear the echoes. Sinners! The forest reclaims! If you choose to breed with the Outlanders--
The sound of it brought Jester a wicked smile to her face. This could be fun.
Stowing her sketchbook in her bag, she took a few more steps forward, casting an illusion to make herself look like herself but more human, and then stumbled into the clearing where she found a...druid? And who she was pretty certain was Atreus’ dad. Oh well, still fun. When she was close enough, she flung herself at the druid, wailing.
“Ohhhh, please, sir. Please, I need your help. One of the Outlanders has left me with child.” She grabbed his hand and placed it against her belly, over top her studded leather corset. “Can you feel it, too? Wooooe, woe! My mother and father have disowned me and the forest demands I repent for my sins.” Another wail. “But the Outlander child calls to me. It tells me I-- I must eat-- brains. Druid brains.” Her hands shot dramatically toward his head. “Brain. Smells. Good. Must have brains. Wooooooe.”
The old man immediately fell back on his heels to remain out of Jester's reach, screeching. "I am a MAGE, madam! My brains will do you no good, no good at all!."
He pointed a bony finger at Kratos and intoned, "See! See, giant! It has already begun! This poor woman is not long for the world. The rabbits will come for her! They will come for all of the heathenous! They are the SALVATION OF VALLO! They will--"
"They will fall to my axe," interrupted Kratos, looking again at the woman. He blinked briefly, realizing that the form looked odd to his eyes, recognizing the illusion. It was the blue woman, a friend of Atreus. Allowing himself to smile and understanding what she was up to, he gestured towards Jester.
"Help her, then. Mighty mage."
Jester thought she caught a flicker of recognition in the larger man’s face and decided in that moment that she liked him if he was willing to let her fun play out. “Magic brains,” she moaned. “The Outlander child...demands...magical flesh.” She fell to her knees and crawled toward the mage, arms outstretched as though grabbing for him. The mage tried to take another step back and stumbled back onto his behind and Jester stifled a laugh.
“Ohhhhh, MURDER BUNNY SAVIORS, HOMICIDAL LEPORIDAE CHILDREN OF THE FOREST GODS, will this magic man’s flesh save me? Give me a sign, wooooe….”
And then she used thaumaturgy to cause the ground beneath the man to shake, and whispering voices to urge eat him, eat him.
His face blanching white, the old mage scrambled to his feet and tried to place his staff between himself and Jester, mumbling what must've been words to a spell. Except he was terrified enough that he kept faltering and losing his concentration. "Outlander magic is ruination, dearest rabbits! I hear you, I hear you! Glory to our saviors!"
With that, he turned and fled into the forest much faster than could be expected. Either magic or a great deal of practice led to a pretty spry exit, that was for certain. Kratos just watched him disappear into the woods, then turned his attention to Jester.
"That was amusing." It was a compliment, as far as Kratos ever expressed himself.
Jester dropped the illusion and rolled over onto her back as she allowed herself a good, hearty laugh. She’d had little opportunity for a trick of that caliber since arriving here--though maybe the false identity she’d created for the guy at the DOA had been close--and it felt good to know she still had it in her. After a few long moments, the laughter subsided and Jester pushed herself back up onto her feet and curtsied.
“Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all night,” she grinned. “Not really, though, because I’m running low on snacks. Was he the only one? Are there others I need to run off?”
"Just the one. There is food nearby, if you are hungry." Kratos turned to walk away but gestured in the direction of the home he shared with Atreus. As he began to walk away, he offered another smile. "I would say you have earned at least one bacon burrito."
Jester’s grin brightened even more as she quickly fell into step beside him--or as much beside him as each of his steps required two of hers. “And I have a couple of donuts left in here that I’d be happy to share, too,” she offered, patting her bag. After all, she thought, she was pretty sure she’d also earned some fresh donuts on the way home, as well.