WHAT. Laudna gets canon bumped and Imogen is there as she wakes up. There are ~feels~ galore here, both sad and happy ones. WHERE. Their room at the Spooky House WHEN. This morning, Sept 27 WARNINGS.Spoilers for CR 3 up to Ep 33/34. Thereâs some sadness and deep discussions here, talks of death. STATUS. Complete! ART CREDIT.here!
It wasnât often that Laudna was out of bed before Imogen. Typically, Laudna was there, even if awake, waiting to see if Imogen had a nightmare, to help her with it. Support was the name of the game for the two of them, and Laudna was always happy to provide it. Imogen was her whole world, the reason she was comforted everyday, the reason it felt like a calming blanket was over her mind when she got up every morning.
Imogen made her feel alive, more than anyone ever had in her entire life and death.
âIs she your favorite?â Laudna had been away, a distance that had been gained all too quickly by Otohan after sheâd said those words. A slash, another slash, and Laudna had expected to fall to the ground but was impaled on a sword instead. She was already out when she crumpled, lifeless.
When she woke here in Vallo, safe in the bed she shared with Imogen, in their room that was full of comfort and love. Arts and crafts Laudna had completed, books and research, comfortable throw pillows and blankets. There was no Otohan in their bedroom, only a sleeping Imogen, and Laudnaâs breathing went back to a normal pace as she took in the peace around her.
Laudna gently pushed back a strand of Imogenâs hair and slipped out of bed to pull on a warm robe to find a little comfort in anything offered to her at this point. She didnât want to disturb her friend, but everything hurt right now. Not physically, physically her body was-- the same. There was no sword stabbed through her chest or blood seeping from wounds. Just an emotional ache that settled into her core.
She made it to the nearby chair before she folded in on herself and wrapped the robe a little tighter, like a security blanket.
Even in sleep, Imogenâs mind seemed to constantly reach out for Laudna. It wasnât entirely surprising, given that they spent most nights sleeping with their hands laced together. Usually Laudnaâs presence was a comfort, but as the painful and terrifying new memories wove themselves into her, Imogen began to absorb pieces of them too. Her sleep turned fitful and her heart raced with anxiety. Another moment later she was awake. âLaudna.â The name tumbled out of her mouth even as she tried to orient herself.
She pushed herself up in the bed as soon as she noticed the other side of the bed was empty. Sheâd been just on the precipice of reaching out to Laudna with her mind when she saw her friend sitting in a chair nearby. What relief she might have felt at locating Laudna was obliterated by not just the expression on her best friendâs face, but the pain that practically poured off her.
Bare feet hit the floor and Imogen was at her side as quickly as she could. She knelt down and wrapped Laudnaâs thin, cold hands in her own. âWhatâs wrong? What happened?â
Laudna should have expected Imogen to be there within minutes, thatâs what they did. The comfort between them had always been a boon, a pleasant thing.
Now she worried about what she was leaving behind. Would Delilah help her, in the end of it all, or was that it? Was she leaving Imogen far too soon?
It was an unacceptable thought, Imogen deserved to have answers, and Laudna had agreed to be at her side until they found them. She couldnât be taken too soon, they had work to do. It was also an unacceptable thought that Imogen might blame herself, after Otohan had targeted them. Her.
Laudna reached out with a cold hand, extracting it from Imogenâs much warmer one to touch the telepathâs face with gentle fingers. âYou know I love you, right?â
Icy fear gripped at Imogen as she took in those words. Why did it sound so much like a goodbye? Her mind was spinning and she could feel her chest constrict. Still, for all the worry and anxiety that was currently coursing through her, she took a moment to breathe. Whatever had happened, she wouldnât let herself go to pieces if Laudna needed her. Sheâd pick her up and support her through anything and everything.
Imogen leaned into Laudnaâs hand and inhaled slowly through her nose. As her pulse began to slow, the smallest of smiles turned up the edges of her mouth. âOf course I do. And I love you too.â
Laudna immediately worried sheâd said too much, or not enough, with how easily Imogen had said it back. But she felt that worry seep off of Imogen and Laudna squeezed her hand a little tighter, in some kind of reassurance.
Anything that happened, she didnât want Imogen to think it was her fault. She never wanted that. But she also couldnât bring herself to say exactly what happened, even though parts of the scene were still replaying in her mind.
âWeâre safe here. Or-- safer, really,â She had an attempt at a smile for that one, given recent events. But none of the Bells Hells had been too damaged from that. Theyâd all even walked away from the race, though that had been more of a limp, all things said. âSo thereâs no point in dwelling on home, if memories pop up or things, alright? We have each other here.â
Early morning light trickled in through the window. It cast everything in a warm sort of glow that Imogen couldnât feel. As she knelt there next to Laudna, thoughts and images began to slip their way into her mind. Itâs possible that sleepiness combined with worry for Laudna had made Imogenâs walls begin to falter. Or perhaps Laudnaâs words made her subconsciously bring them down. Whatever the cause, Imogenâs mind began to fill with the most awful images.
Orym lay still on the ground, the sending stone nearby after having tumbled out of his grasp. An older woman stood above him, sword in hand. âWeâve met beforeâ and then Orym is gone.
Fearne is attacked next, her body crumpled in the dirt. Another strike from the grey-haired woman, and Fearne is gone too.
She sees herself, pleading and desperate, begging for her friends to be spared. And thenâŚ
âIs she your favorite?â
As a vivid image of the sword impaling Laudna invaded her mind, Imogen dropped to all fours. The room spun around her as her shaking arms barely managed to keep her upright.
âNo. No. No.â She uttered the word over and over as tears began to stream down her face. âLaudna? Laudna!â Imogen quickly reached her hand back out. She gripped Laudnaâs hand tightly.
She wanted so desperately to keep a hold of herself, but she could feel herself ripping apart at the seams. Still holding onto Laudnaâs hand, Imogen dropped her head onto the other womanâs lap. âIâm so sorry,â she whispered. âIâm so, so sorry.â
âOh, darling.â Laudna knew Imogen touched in on the images, and she didnât mind in the sense that she trusted Imogen explicitly.
But she minded in the sense that if she could have spared Imogen some of this anguish, she would have. She would have spared Imogen all of it, if she could have. But it was bound to happen sooner or later, since Laudna wasnât one for keeping Imogen out of her mind, if she could help it.
She just hoped Imogen could feel the love she had for her. Far deeper than was strictly friendly, but Laudna was beyond caring. She had nothing left to lose at this point. âDarling.â She pushed Imogenâs lavender hair back off of her face. âNone of it is your fault. I promise you that. Weâre here, now.â
She wanted to take comfort in Laudnaâs words, but it still felt like it was her fault. She didnât have all the context of course, just bits and pieces, but that grey-haired womanâŚsomething about her attacks came off as so personal.
Is she your favorite?
The words continued to play on repeat in Imogenâs mind as she lay with her head in Laudnaâs lap. The cool fingers were a comfort on her too warm skin. With tears still running down her face, Imogen looked up. Laudna was such a unique soul and they had connected so deeply in their time together. She was devastated by what had happened to Orym and Fearne too, of course, but Laudna was truly the one Imogen was certain she could never get over losing.
âLaudna, IâŚâ She paused, searching for a way to put her feelings into words. When they did come, they tumbled out of Imogen in a rush. As if she was afraid if she didnât say them now, she never would. âYou are my favorite. Youâre my best friend, and IâŚ.Iâm in love with you. And I know youâve just had all these new, awful memories pushed into your head, and this is probably a terrible time to admit it. But I justâŚwhatever happens here, or back at home, I need you to know that.â
With such dark memories crowding her brain, it was a wonder she didnât think sheâd hit her head and imagined Imogenâs words. Theyâd been part of her dreams for so long that hearing them felt as if she was still asleep.
Laudna reached over and pinched her arm, in a moment of reprieve, and then laughed, a musical low sound that was out of place with all of this. It didnât stop her, though, and she had to hold Imogen a little tighter just to offer some reassurance. âI wasnât- Imogen--â
She was suddenly afraid her laughter might have been taken to think that Imogen would assume it was directed at her, and Laudna rushed ahead, her words as scrambled as Imogenâs had been. âThatâs what I meant when I said I loved you, earlier. Iâm in love with you. I have been for a very long time.â Imogen could certainly do better than a dead girl, which is what Laudna would have told her months before.
It was a surreal moment. As Imogen sat there, remnants of her tears on her cheeks, and waited to see how Laudna would react. When she reached over to pinch herself and laugh, Imogenâs spirit immediately buoyed. It was just so perfectly Laudna. Despite the grief and pain that was still there in the back of her mind, she felt her heart swell and a light returned to her eyes.
Of course that was what Laudna had been trying to say, and Imogen had missed it completely. A slight blush rose to her cheeks and she shook her head. âI shouldâve- Iâm sorry, I didnât- for someone who can read thoughts, I can be real oblivious sometimes.â
Laudna laughed again, and kept that comforting touch up as much as Imogen would allow her. She knew she was cold, her hands always were, but Imogen made her feel warm, especially from the inside. âYou have nothing to apologize for,â and she meant that, truly and deeply. There had been no hurry in Laudnaâs words, even knowing-- what might come. What would come.
She let her hand trail down Imogenâs jaw, and then brushed away a tear. âIâve had a long life already, but the last two years that Iâve known you-- I canât imagine not having you in my life. You make everything so much better.â
To Imogen, Laudnaâs touch didnât even really register as cold anymore. It did in the physical sense, of course, but it wasnât unpleasant. After their time together, it was something she associated with feelings of love and safety and comfort. It was welcomed and never anything she would tire of.
âI canât imagine mine without you either.â Her chest constricted again as visions from Laudnaâs mind filled her head and she had to inhale deeply to calm herself. âLaudna, I promise youâŚI will go to the end of the world to find a way to bring you back.â Imogen knew that with everything in her. Laudna was her person, and she wouldnât stop until she found someone who could help her. âI wonât ever let you be alone again.â She reached for Laudnaâs other hand and kissed it gently.
Donât make promises you canât keep, Laudna knew she didnât have to say it out loud, and it was a thought she would have preferred Imogen not hear, but if she did-- well, she held true to it. Laudna wouldnât hold it against Imogen if there wasnât a way to bring her back, she already had more of a chance to live than most people got.
âIâm here right now.â She tucked a strand of lavender hair back. âIâm here for as long as youâll have me. I never want to be without you, either. Youâre my endgame and own a large piece of my heart, Imogen.â
Imogen heard the thought. They were too intertwined in that moment for her not to. She didnât like that Laudna had thought it, but she also couldnât deny the reality of it. Bringing someone back from the dead was difficult enough in the best of circumstances, let alone Laudnaâs unique situation. Yet Imogen had to believe they could do it. That the whole group would do whatever it took. She didnât want to imagine a world with any other outcome- a world where Laudna was justâŚgone.
Laudnaâs words wrapped around Imogen like a blanket, warm and comforting, but they werenât enough. She pushed herself up to her feet, and gently pulled Laudna up and out of the chair. They were close enough that their noses were practically touching. âTogether, then. Me and you.â As it should be. As it was supposed to be.
âAlways,â Laudna agreed, wholeheartedly. She leaned in and pressed a gentle, hesitant kiss to Imogenâs cheek, not wanting to push her luck (dead girl walking, and all). But she also was just appreciating the closeness that Imogen offered, no expectations, it felt right, just being the two of them in this quiet, happy moment that had itâs share of sadness lingering in the background.
Laudna wrapped her arms around Imogen to hold her tight. âTogether, through even the fiercest storm.â