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Yeah, I get you. My dream self was actually like, "wow, so I'm dying, but it's fine that my son doesn't know who I am and a one-handed herpes sore of a pirate is going to take everything that's mine two days after I'm lowered into the ground" but me? I'm kind of pissed about it.
Drinks I can do. Maybe therapy? Have you thought about it? I've been giving it a try too.