Damon/Elena
Damon. No. No sex details ever. A. I wouldn't use lack of sex to punish you, no matter what I've joked about, and B. If I didn't want to sleep with you for some reason, would you want me to do it anyway because you'd blackmailed me into it?
All my kiss monster is belong to you? Lolcat speak is weird when you reverse it...
God, I know, dream Stefan and Elena are so boringly vanilla. They barely even flirt. And he definitely doesn't allow her on top. Where's the fun in that?