Queen of the Forsaken (slavetotorment) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2012-10-30 22:12:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, alleria windrunner, sylvanas windrunner |
If I become the Banshee Queen, it has to be you, you and no one else who takes me down.
Who: Sylvanas and Alleria
What: Sisterly bonding, talking about girl kissing, and death promises
When: Saturday
Where: Their home
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
anyone at all that wasn't the kitchen services guy</i>, but the fact that it was a girl just made her week.
She brought home takeout to celebrate this momentous event, "Sylvie! I brought home your favorite!"
"You know what the costume girl said about take out," Sylvanas admonished, as she swept into the kitchen and onto the food like a vulture. Clearly she didn't give a damn what the costume girl said about take out.
It could have been the lighting but she seemed paler today. She sniffed at the food, then grabbed a fork and dug in.
"I don't give a damn what the costume girl thinks. I'm going to make my own costume. Or have someone else make it," Alleria declared, while getting herself a fork. She took a seat near Sylvanas and pulled over her own takeout container, "It's going to cover more of me and still be sexy, and our producers can deal with it."
She wanted to grill her about the kissing, but that could wait until after they were done eating.
“If you pull that off let me know. Lord knows I don’t mind looking like a slut but I want to be taken seriously.” Idly, she wondered if Alleria came out if she’d become one of those gay icon type people. Like Xena.
“You should come out. For real.”
Alleria stared at her for a second, like she was trying to decide if her sister was serious or not, "I thought everyone knew I was gay. I know our agent is freaking out, but with the way Rita keeps writing about me, it's probably a given anyway."
"I know, but actually admitting it is a completely different matter. Maybe they'll even write in a girlfriend for your character." She shrugged a shoulder. With luck they'd hit it off off camera too. Alleria needed someone who wasn't fucking Danika.
It was probably more likely they'd continue the plot they had going where she ended up kissing a gay man on set and pretending to have chemistry with him. The only thing going on between them off camera was that he kept giving her off-set style tips.
Though his influence had helped her get her hair under control.
She wrinkled her nose, "I guess I should. I'm definitely too gay to ever try men, we've seen how hard it is for me to fake it on the show. I still don't know what dream-me was thinking."
"Could be your exception. Everyone has one of those." Sylvanas wasn't sure Pansy was her exception, but it had been fun. She didn't have enough fun lately.
"Don't even bother with a press release. Just drop the bomb when it comes up again."
"So the next time Rita writes about me I what, make a net post? 'Yes, I'm a lesbian. I like girls. They're soft and supple and curvy and amazing, and I can't get enough of them'?" Alleria looked at Sylvanas like she was questioning her sanity.
“Yes. Hell, do that any time. Maybe you’ll get a date.” She grinned, “Or send one my way. I might as well go all the way and see how it is.”
She scrunched up her nose as she thought about touching a woman, “Maybe I’ll stock up on beer first.”
"It's not that bad!" Alleria laughed at her sister's expression, and shook her head, "Didn't you like kissing that woman? It's even better than kissing, it's amazing."
"It was...soft and nice, yes. I'd had a few drinks though so that might have helped." Sylvanas folded her arms stubbornly. At least right now she seemed a lot more her normal self, and less on the verge of returning to her goth phase.
The look on Sylvanas's face was amusing, and the stubborn pose even more so. Alleria laughed, "I'm not going to push you into it, I just want you to be happy. And tell me all the details. You had some drinks? How many drinks? What did she look like?"
"It tasted like ass, so we went to another place. There was some dancing, some more drinks. Three or four. I actually don't remember what prompted the kiss. It was actually pretty public, I'm surprised Skeeter wasn't all over that." She shook her head, "Brunette, kind of a cute nose."
"Maybe she was full up on crazy this week and decided to wait until next week." Alleria shrugged. She didn't pretend to know how Rita's mind worked, and frankly didn't want to. The thought made her skin crawl. The woman was a creepy stalker, in some ways.
"She sounds cute. Did you get her number?"
"Yes, but that's not important," Sylvanas protested. "It's not going to be anything, and I'm not sure I want it to be something."
"Maybe you should give it a try first. You might like it, and it's better than that guy from food services."
She thought Sylvanas was being a little too stubborn about this, "You didn't hate it, you said so yourself."
“I think she’s as much of a lesbian as I am,” Sylvanas retorted stubbornly. “I’d rather not pursue something that has no chance of success.”
She blinked, and added, “I’d rather not pursue anything at all!!!”
"You don't have to be a lesbian you know, there's no rule that says you can only like one or the other. You can like both, or just be drunk and experiment a little."
Sylvanas was acting more and more oddly lately, and Alleria thought it was high time she got to the bottom of it, "Why wouldn't you want to pursue something? You could do with a little excitement in your life that isn't caused by Danika and her random bullshit, or me and mine. I know I'm boring, but you don't have to be."
"What, I should slut myself out at clubs?" Sylvanas looked both offended and disturbed, "I don't.. I don't do relationships. It's a miracle I'm not a virgin. After mom and dad, and everything at the enclave, and watching you and Danika..I'm better off alone."
"You KNOW that's not what I meant, Sylvie..." Alleria frowned, "And that's not fair. It's not fair to them. It's not fair to me, and it's certainly not fair to yourself. You shouldn't be alone your entire life just because I suck at moving on and our parents... That isn't your fault!"
"I have you," She said. "That's all I'll need, all I'll ever need." She grabbed Alleria's upper arm, "Do you understand that? Really, really understand that? You left and everything went to hell!"
The hurt on Alleria's face was unmistakable, though why she was hurt, she wasn't quite sure. She had left, in that other place, but she'd never left Sylvanas' side in this world. She wrenched her arm away, "I've never left you. Not here. Not where it COUNTS."
Something inside Sylvanas snapped a little.
"LOOK AT ME!" She shrieked, almost banshee like, "I'M DYING!"
There were times when Alleria could be accused of being in Denial. Certainly where her former lover was concerned, it often looked like she was. But the truth was that Alleria knew the risks. She could see the practical side of things. She knew Danika was never going to settle down with her. She knew it was likely that she was dead now, or worse.
And she knew that something was wrong with her sister. Very, seriously wrong, and had been ever since that day she'd died in bed. She couldn't turn her face away from that, couldn't pretend that wasn't happening. It wasn't in her. It wasn't the type of person she was. So she looked at her sister, even though her heart was sinking into her shoes, "I don't understand how this is happening. I don't understand. And I don't know that I could have prevented it. He would have had two of us, instead of just one. I'd hunt the bastard down and kill him 500 times for what he did to you, but I don't know what to do, now."
Sylvanas buried her face in her hands. Her voice came out muffled, "I don't know. I freed them. Forsaken by all and I their queen."
Her hands dropped, and her eyes seemed to glow eerily red, before the color faded, "I'm becoming that..that thing. A slave to torment, she called herself. It's a torture, a way of aching without actually feeling anything and I don't know how to stop it. There's no undead horde for me to command, I'll be truly alone in my pain and anger."
"NO. No. You don't have to. Nothing happened to you here, not like that. You can fight it, can't you?" Alleria ran her hand up into her hair. Her mind was reeling, but there was nowhere for it to land. No tactical plan or brilliant military strategy was going to save her sister from this. She wasn't even sure medicine or science could.
"You aren't alone. I'm HERE."
Sylvanas wrapped her arms around Alleria. Hoarsely, she rasped, "I love you, I don't want to go, I don't want to be the Queen." She didn't know if it could be stopped, if she'd be able to fight the torment. The thought of dying terrified her, "My soul hurts."
Alleria rubbed her sister's back in circles. This wasn't Azeroth. It wasn't. It didn't have to be like Azeroth. She opened her mouth to say that, but she already had. Repeating it wouldn't make her words more effective.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I left, there. I'm sorry that I chose him over you..."
"You chose to save us all," Sylvanas replied, shaking her head as tears began to fall. They were slow, and cold, pushed out half through stubborn willpower, but they fell.
"If I chose to save you all, you know I did that for you... for Vereesa." Alleria whispered. She squeezed Sylvanas against her, "I love you, sister. You're the only thing I have left."
"If the time comes, that I become that being of vengeance and hate and anger. If I become the Banshee Queen, it has to be you, you and no one else who takes me down. Do you understand, sister?"
Sylvanas' tone was serious, and her voice thick as the tears streamed down her pale face. Her voice caught, "It has to be you. It has to be, and you have to go on when I'm gone and live for both of us."
Alleria understood. She understood, but she didn't want to understand. It was something that no one would have questioned in the other world. It was the highest duty that a sister and fellow ranger could perform, and she wouldn't have trusted anyone else's hand to it. Not with her sister's life. It was still her sister, no matter what.
But she didn't know if anyone would understand that, here. Did it matter? Tears were streaming out of her eyes, and her own voice was hoarse when she finally answered, "I promise. My hand, and no one else's. I'm the only one who loves you enough to do it right."