InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "We're all stories in the end."

Commander (the_commander) wrote in valarlogs,
@ 2012-04-22 13:01:00

Entry tags:

!complete, commander tyra shepard, garrus vakarian, truthiness plot

After the beering
Who: Shepard, Garrus, and a random hooker with a sexy accent named Anna
What: What the hell happened last night?
When: Morning
Where: A motel room
Status: Complete!
Rating: Final Rating? PG-13 for hookers watching tv!

There were rare times when Tyra slept like the dead. Usually she was plagued by memories and flashbacks of her combat tours and wetworks missions. But put enough booze in her and set a warm body next to her and she'd sleep in relative peace.

She woke up with a pounding headache and cottonmouth, and very warm. Grope went a hand. That was a breast. That wasn't herbreast. Grope went another hand. That was man-butt.

Shep groaned in dismay.

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notasstylishly
2012-04-22 08:22 pm UTC (link)

Garrus groaned too, but that was due to a particularly terrible hangover that apparently was waiting for him on the other side of consciousness.

That wouldn't do.

Slapping at the hand, he turned so his head so it was firmly lodged against the pillow. He wasn't naked, just in boxers, but that was a hand and his last memories involved were with Shepard. Likely nothing had happened, right?

Of course right.

... shit.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 08:33 pm UTC (link)
	Tyra ran her hands over her own body. No bra, but she still had her bottoms on. That's a good sign. She didn't feel sticky either. That was a better sign. Because if that was Vakarian.... She groped the woman again, this time because...hey, boobies. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 08:38 pm UTC (link)
	Garrus finally cracked an eye, getting an eyeful of boob and ass. Great. And that was Shepard. "... fuck me gently with a chainsaw. What the hell happened?" His voice was as rough as sandpaper and he really just wanted to go back to sleep. Who was the woman? He couldn't imagine that anything had happened. Who put boxers back on after sex? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 08:47 pm UTC (link)
	"I don't remember," Shepard replied, her voice more gravelly than she would prefer. "But we're not alone." She groped the woman again helpfully, eliciting a giggle from the - she checked quickly - natural redhead. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 09:09 pm UTC (link)
	"Well, obviously. You don't have three tits." He sounded downright cranky for a man waking up in bed with two women. Standing up and scratching the back of his neck, Garrus tried to figure out where the hell they were. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

the_commander
2012-04-22 09:17 pm UTC (link)

"You sound downright cranky for a man waking up in bed with two women," She quipped, sliding out of bed. The red-head stretched, sitting up on her elbows and grinning at them, "Y'all the most adorable heterosexual life partners ah've ever seen."

Oh. She sounded as hot as she looked. Tyra almost slipped back into bed with her. Instead, she walked topless to the window and peered out, hissing at the rising sun, "Fuuuck."

She slid the curtains closed again, "Motel."

"Ah ain't evah seen two people drink that much that fast, while watchin' Cupcake Wars."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 09:20 pm UTC (link)
	Garrus found his shirt, pulling it over his shoulders and eying the woman in the bed. Figuring he'd head out early, mainly to give Shepard a solid, he tried to find his pants. "We got drunk and watched Cupcake Wars? Yeah, that sounds like us." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

the_commander
2012-04-22 09:25 pm UTC (link)

"Ah won't even charge!" The hooker grinned at them, hopping out of bed, "Ah needed t'night off anyhow. Y'know? This was more fun then when that couple had me eat ice cream while they watched."

She poked Garrus in the side, "Y'all got this cute little laugh, sugar."

Shepard snerked, "We seriously hired you to watch tv with us?"

The hooker nodded, pulling on lacy underthings, and then a skimpy dress, "Ah'm starvin', all them cupcakes gave me a cravin'!"

Looking over at Garrus, she mouthed, 'Cupcake Wars?'

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 09:28 pm UTC (link)
	Garrus shrugged, finding his jeans and pulling them on as well. "Wait, you're starving? Fuck it, we'll spring for breakfast." They picked up a hooker to drink and watch TV. If there was any proof that their career paths were poor choices, this was it. Really, he felt vaguely guilty about the whole thing. Plus redheads weren't usually his type. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 09:31 pm UTC (link)
	"Really? Y'all sure!" The hooker grinned. Best morning after ever! Except the one time that guy totally died on her and she made off with his wallet. That was a good morning too, "Jus' call me Anna." Tyra quickly dressed, "You can call me anything you want in that accent." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 09:49 pm UTC (link)
	Doing his best to not roll his eyes, Garrus found his shoes and coat. "Shepard, you're ridiculous." But it was said with a very fond tone, so that meant it didn't count. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 10:03 pm UTC (link)
	She elbowed him in the ribs, "Hey, I'm not going to pay for sex, but I'm not dead." Louder, she said, "Where are you treating two beautiful ladies?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 10:09 pm UTC (link)
	Garrus checked his wallet. She hadn't robbed him. What a nice prostitute! "Eh, if it's on me, might as well pick something fancy, ladies." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 10:16 pm UTC (link)
	The two women exchanged a glance. It was the universal glance of 'he just dug a hole in his wallet.' Tyra turned back to Garrus, "I know just the place. I'll drive." ~~dundundun~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 10:18 pm UTC (link)
	Oh no. Oh no no no. "No, I'll drive." Garrus Vakarian was not really afraid of much in this life, but Tyra Shepard's driving was absolutely one of those things. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 10:24 pm UTC (link)
	Anna looked at Garrus, "Ah vote Mr. Handsome drives, sugar. No offense but ah feared for mah life the whole way here." Tyra grunted, and tossed Vakarian the keys. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 10:27 pm UTC (link)
	"Look at it this way, Shepard. It'll be a lot easier to make out in the back seat if you're not driving." Not that she wouldn't be either way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_commander 2012-04-22 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	"No charge?" Anna smiled hopefully. Tyra rolled her eyes, "Well if there's no charge...." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notasstylishly 2012-04-22 10:31 pm UTC (link)
	Garrus shook his head. Only Shepard could talk a hooker into a freebee. And only he'd drive the whole mess. "I'll go get the car. Be back in about a half hour." He grinned over his shoulder. She owed him one. (Reply to this) (Parent)