Pain. Hate. Envy. Those are the ABCs of me. (bygones) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2016-10-04 12:45:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, caroline forbes, jonathan murphy |
Who: Murphy and Caroline
What: Dream talk
When: A week or two after the grounder sickness
Where: Baxter's Bakery
Rating/Warning: Talk about dream murder
Status: Complete
The grounder sickness had come and gone, and Murphy was surprised at how quickly life just moved on like nothing had happened. Of course, from the sounds of it, stranger things had happened. It was a little jarring, the different attitudes people had taken in both realities. In the dreams, Bellamy had accused Murphy of working with the grounders with the sickness. As if Murphy had wanted to be tortured for three days and then infected with the worst 24-hour flu he’d ever experienced. When Bellamy had accused him, Murphy hadn’t even been sure if the sickness was fatal or not, which just pissed him off more.
But here, Neal had told him it wasn’t his fault. Even when he’d posted to the Network, he’d been half-convinced people would jump down his throat for it. Instead, everyone had seemed strangely accepting.
At least online they had been. Murphy hadn’t exactly gone to Baxter’s in the intervening weeks to find out if the super strong girl was holding a grudge. But it seemed to be long enough now that even if she was she probably wouldn’t be too pissed anymore. “Hey,” Murphy said to the blonde as he approached the till. “Coffee and a bagel.”
The grounder’s sickness was long forgotten for Caroline. Yes it had been torture to see her boyfriend so sick, not to mention all the blood smell. But it was basically just another day in Orange County. And Peeta was fine now, besides it wasn’t that Murphy guy’s fault his dreams were so horrible.
“Hey,” Caroline greeted him with a smile. “Murphy, right?” A lot of customers came into Baxter’s. She tried to remember them all, but she almost always remembered a fellow dreamer. “Coming right up,” she added walking over to the display case to grab his food first.
“Yeah,” Murphy said. “How’s your boyfriend doing?” he asked. He didn’t care much, but he wanted the superpowered girl on his side, and the best way to do that was to feign concern over things he knew she’d care about.
“He’s much better. All back to normal and at work now.” She was almost surprised he remembered. But then if her dreams had caused an illness throughout Orange County she would probably remember everyone affected too. “How have you been?” she asked handing over his bagel. “Dreams get any better?”
“Glad to hear it,” Murphy said, offering her a bit of a smile. He took the bagel and pulled some cash out of his pocket to pay for his order. “But no. They haven’t.” He had no intention of offering more than that either. In his dreams, he’d been accepted back at camp. At least until Jasper had caught him smothering Myles. After that, he’d tried to hang Bellamy, blew a hole out of the dropship, ran away, and was caught by Grounders again. “At the rate they’re going, I doubt they ever will either.”
She put the cash in the register handing over his change before going to get his coffee. Caroline couldn’t help but frown at that answer. Not that she really expected much different. Dreams just seemed to get worse and worse, until they got completely insane. Or maybe that was just her dreams. “I know that feeling,” she commented. “If you ever need to vent, I get it. Even if our dreams are completely different.”
Murphy shrugged. “It’s not like talking about it is going to make any of it better,” he said after a moment. “And I’m pretty sure talking about it is a good way to make people hate me in the first place.” He really wasn’t a great person in the dreams. Not that he was going to win Saint of the Year in California either, but at least he could say that he hadn’t straight up murdered two people who were already sick or injured in the Orange County. His hands weren’t completely blood free, but it he had never consciously made the decision to end someone’s life here.
“You’d be surprised,” Caroline replied. She had seen plenty of things in her dreams. More murders than she could ever count. And the people that she knew in both worlds? She didn’t hate them, either place. “People might surprise you,” she added handing over his coffee.
“Yeah, people tend to do that here,” Murphy admitted. He was still waiting for the other shoe to drop, especially in regards to Neal. The man had already done so much for him, but Murphy was well aware that no one should expect anything for free in this world, not even kindness. He took his coffee. “But more often than not they don’t.”
Well someone had a cynical way of looking at life. Just wait, if he spent enough time with Caroline soon her optimism would rub off. Or well it might. It had a few other times at least. “Maybe you should give them the benefit of the doubt,” she suggested. “Or at least me,” because clearly that was what was important here.
Murphy managed a wry half-smile at that. Murphy didn’t give people ‘the benefit of the doubt.’ That was a good way to get screwed over. But, well, if it would keep her on his side, he was willing to let her think he would. “Yeah? You actually want to hear about my dreams?” he asked.
“Or course,” she honestly did like hearing about all the dreams. There were so many different worlds out there. “They can’t be as bad as mine,” she added with a smirk. Maybe some competition would help motivate this guy to talk to her.
Murphy looked over his shoulder to make sure no one was near enough to hear. Baxter’s was relatively empty, just a couple of people on the other side of the cafe in conversation amongst themselves, so he was sure they could talk uninterrupted for a little while at least. “I’m the bad guy. In mine. I killed two people.” He’d tried to kill two others too, though he’d failed with them. “There were reasons, but I guess the fact that they tried to kill me first isn’t good enough.” Not that Jasper had ever tried to kill him, but the kid had been keeping everyone up all night with his insufferable screaming. Murphy had been sure he would have done him a favour.
This poor guy. Killing two people was nothing. Even Caroline had killed more than that. And clearly he felt remorse about it. She gave him a sympathetic smile, keeping her voice low. “That’s a pretty good reason,” Caroline assured him. “I don’t think it makes you a bad guy. There or here. And if you’re feeling bad about it here that definitely shows what kind of person you are.” It was tough for new dreamers. Caroline remembered what it was like when she first started dreaming over two years ago. But as long as you remembered you weren’t the same person as your dreams, it helped. At least for her. Although she wasn’t all that different from her dreamself to begin with.
It did show what kind of guy Murphy was, though as far as he was concerned it wasn’t a great thing. Not particularly surprising, given that he was responsible for the death of both his parents, but still kind of troubling to see. Apparently when things got bad, Murphy got worse. “That’s not what the people in my dreams thing,” Murphy snorted. Surprisingly though, no one on this side of the dreams seemed to have a problem with the fact that he was just one completed murder short of serial killerdom.
“That has to be rough.” Because what else was there to say? No one in her dreams thought she was a bad person. Vampire or not. “But just try to remember to keep it all separate. It’s not like you’ve killed anyone here.” At least she sure hoped he hadn’t.
“Yeah, it’s not like,” Murphy agreed. A small, tight smile crossed his lips for a brief moment. He shifted on his feet, then and looked back at Caroline. “What about yours? Vampires and werewolves and ghosts. Oh my.”
“We do have all those in mine,” Caroline agreed with a smile. “So as you can imagine I’ve seen my fair share of murder.” Vampires and werewolves were known to be predators after all.
“I bet,” Murphy said. “Sounds spooky. Though, I guess they probably prepare you better for this place.” Murphy knew vampires existed here, but it was still weird to wrap his head around sometimes. The supernatural didn’t exist in his dreams, and they hadn’t existed in his waking life either until recently. It was a little hard to adjust sometimes. “So what, you’re some kind of… vampire slayer or something?”
Caroline almost laughed at the idea of her being a vampire slayer. But that would be rude, especially since Murphy was still new to dreaming and just trying to understand it all. “More like a vampire,” she replied honestly. There was a time where she kept what she was a secret. Now she didn’t advertise it, but she was more open to telling people.
Murphy raised his eyebrows and gave Caroline an incredulous look. He probably shouldn’t have been that surprised, but she seemed a little too cheerleader to be one of the children of the night. Though it would explain why she’d be so annoyed at Twilight. “What. You do the whole draining people dry thing?”
“No!” Caroline couldn’t hide the shock from her voice. But she did remember to lower it again after that little outburst. Other people didn’t need to hear what they were talking about. “I use blood bags. But I have killed in the dreams if that makes you feel any better,” it wasn’t something she was proud of either. But she wanted Murphy to know he wasn’t alone in the whole killing thing.
Murphy’s eyes widened slightly at the outburst, but he had to admit that he felt a little better knowing that she wasn’t going to snack on him sometime if she got hungry enough. He glanced over his shoulder once to make sure that no one else was listening in, but luckily most people had already turned back to their coffees. “Not really,” he said, shrugging a little, because standing face to face with a predator who’d admitted to killing people in the dreams was hardly reassuring. But the shrug was accompanied by a bit of a half-smile and an almost teasing tone to his voice, because he knew what she meant by it. “It does put things into perspective though.”
“I don’t kill here,” she assured voice low a small smile on her face. She could tell he was a little worried about that aspect. “But yes, trust me I get what you’re going through.” Because she did. She had just dealt with it awhile ago. “And I’m sure we aren’t the only dream murderers out here.” She actually knew that for a fact but those weren’t her secrets to tell.
“Good to know,” he said, half smiling at her, both in that she didn’t kill her and that others and that other people were likely dream murderers themselves. Neal had said something similar along those lines. That Murphy wasn’t his dreamself, and he didn’t have to follow that path. Murphy wasn’t really sure about that though. He frowned to himself. “But thanks. For the coffee,” he said, holding up his mug. “Maybe next time we talk you won’t be working.”
“Of course,” Caroline said and then without thinking grabbed a napkin and wrote down her number. No this wasn’t her trying to pick him up. She was in a very committed relationship thank you very much. Plus he was a little young for her. This was just Caroline being her usual kind self. “If you ever need to talk,” she offered handing it over to him.
Murphy took the napkin, glancing at the number before putting it in his pocket. “I’ll do that,” he said, offering her a bit of a smile. Then he turned and left.