Maleficent Is Conflicted (on_dark_wings) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2014-11-01 13:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, aurora [disney], maleficent |
who: Aurora and Maleficent
What: Confrontations and major spoilers for Maleficent
When: A few days ago
where: Maleficent's
Status: Complete
Aurora kept the radio off as she drove to Maleficent’s. She had enough distraction from her thoughts and trying to work out how to put them into words without worrying about more distraction.
She’d dreamed again. Of telling her “aunts” that she was going to go and live in the Moors. Or she was going to tell them that, but she’d only gotten as far as telling she was going to leave to live on her own. And then the revelations started and they never really stopped. She wasn’t an orphan. Her parents were the king and queen. She’d been sent to be raised by these pixies because...because a “wicked” faerie had placed a curse on her so that she would fall into an endless sleep on her sixteenth birthday.
In the dreams, she’d run to the one person in all the world she could trust to tell her the truth and not try to soften things or sugarcoat them. But that just made it worse, because the truth hurt so much more because Aurora had been lied to. Not just by the mostly useless pixies, but by her faerie godmother. And that hurt more than anything Aurora had ever felt. She’d woken up sobbing and had continued to do so until she could cry any more. The feelings--the pain--was so intense that not even being able to make some guesses based on the OC version of events eased the pain.
She had to talk to Maleficent.
Even though Maleficent had long known of the extent of events (both the ones she'd experienced and the fairy tales she'd read in the years after), she still wasn't ready to face it. Aurora was different from the girl in her dreams. Older, a little wiser. And she likely could put 2 and 2 together to know who'd caused that curse in Orange County.
And now, Maleficent was certain that she'd dreamed of the truth. And maybe it wouldn't matter in the end. She could hope. But she didn't think it would.
She paced, and then paced some more, and finally opened the door when Aurora arrived. There was no use in lying, or hiding the truth. Like in the dreams, Aurora deserved to know who and what she really was.
When Maleficent opened the door, all Aurora could do for a moment was stare at her. She felt the tears starting up again and she clenched her jaw. Her feelings were conflicted. She wanted to scream and rage and maybe even hit the faerie. But just the thought of actually going through with that made Aurora feel ill; that was her father’s way, and he was the last person on Earth she wanted to be like. She also knew that if King Stefan was anything like CEO Stefan, he’d probably done something terrible to Maleficent. And Aurora was pretty sure she could guess what.
But right now, the look on Maleficent’s face was so like the one Aurora had seen in the dream. And it made everything hurt.
“You broke my heart. In the dreams.” Aurora swallowed against the lump forming in her throat. “I didn’t...in the dream I didn’t have a word for the pain, but…” She clenched her hands into fists at her side. “You were everything to me. You were the one person...in my entire world that I could depend on…and it fucking hurts!”
She accepted that this was the End. Just as she had then. She expected to be slapped, or hit. She'd deserve it. But Aurora wasn't her father. She kept her face even, stepping aside to let Aurora in. She closed the door, and clasped her hands in front of her.
"I did something terrible. I was so angry, so vengeful, that I cursed an innocent babe who'd done nothing to me, simply because she was something precious to Stefan."
Maleficent stared at Aurora, her eyes piercing. "I'd hoped you'd never succumb to the curse. I.."
Aurora stepped inside, wrapping her arms around herself. “He took your wings.” It wasn’t a question. He’d taken Maleficent’s wings. Aurora had been like Icarus; she’d soared too high and fallen because truth burned like fire.
Her eyes searched Maleficent’s face. “You couldn’t take it back, could you?”
She couldn’t deny that, but she didn’t have the words. She only nodded her head. Stefan had taken her wings, and with it her innocence and her trust. But that darkness had always been inside her, or so she thought. He’d just given her the push. Her mouth was dry, when she finally answered. “The curse was...tailored to resist all magics and attempts to break it. Even my own.”
But there was a flaw, there was a flaw, and the pain in Aurora’s voice revealed that flaw deep in Maleficent’s heart. All who knew Aurora would come to love her.
And Maleficent had known her. And Maleficent had loved her.
“It’s...it’s confusing, feeling this,” Aurora said. “Because I know what my father is like...and because of that I could guess about King Stefan, but there…” She wiped at her eyes and took a deep breath. “...there, all I knew that my entire life was a lie, and that the one person I loved, the one person who actually seemed to care about me...was the reason for that lie. It hurt, because you knew. All those years watching me grow, all those days we spent together…”
She looked back at Maleficent, eyes red and still full of tears. “...I still love you, okay? It just...it’s raw and it hurts, and everything was more intense for me anyway when I was that age so it’s like an emotional overload…” She took a deep breath. “But I still love you. And...I still did then, too. It just...hurt too much then.”
Maleficent couldn’t hold Aurora’s eyes, and looked down at the ground. “If I could take it back, I would. I not deserve your love. I am not a good person. Not there, not here. You deserve someone as filled with light as you are. Not a bitter woman.” And not a bitter woman whose company could damn near be considered evil.
Aurora shook her head, a spark flaring in her eyes. “Don’t talk about ‘deserving.’ You don’t get to decide what I ‘deserve’ any more than he does, okay? It’s my life, my heart.” She closed the distance between them, one hand going to Maleficent’s face to tilt it gently to look at Aurora. “My love. And I love you.” She took a deep breath. “And you’re only bitter in the first place because my father is an asshole.”
Maleficent didn't want to hear this. She didn't want to hear any of this because it flew in the face of everything she believed. She tried to turn her face away from Aurora, but found she couldn't tear her eyes away. "You're barely legal, what do you even know about love? What do you truly know about me?"
She felt guilty. She felt a little dirty, like she'd led someone with an innocent heart astray. It didn't stop her from wanting her (Aurora standing up for herself did funny things in Maleficent's belly). It didn't stop her, from dare she even think it?
It didn't stop her from loving her.
The comment on her age stung. Partly because it was such an obvious piece of ammunition, which made Aurora hate it being used even more, and partly because, well, she was a lot younger than Maleficent, and she’d only really dated one other person before. But that didn’t mean her feelings weren’t valid.
“I know you mean the world to me,” Aurora said softly. “And I know you stood up to my father and that you’d do anything to keep him from hurting me again. And I know that you have an amazing smile, and a great laugh. And now I know you wanted to remove that curse, that you regretted it.” She ran her thumb over a sharp cheekbone and sighed.
It had been a terrible thing to say, and she knew it. It had been a low blow, and Maleficent had regretted it the moment the words had come out of her mouth. But Aurora wasn't fleeing. It made her chest ache and her legs weak.
"I would never let him hurt you, for as long as I have the power and money to do so. And that goes far beyond my own feelings for him. Sweet Aurora...I do not deserve you."
Aurora sighed. “Would you please stop saying that?” She wrapped her arms around Maleficent’s waist and hid her face face against the faerie’s shoulder. “Please.”
"But it is true. I do not deserve love, Aurora. I do not deserve yours and I do not deserve to love you the way I do."
“That doesn’t stop me from loving you,” Aurora murmured against Maleficent’s shoulder.
"I am sorry." For everything. For all the hurt she's caused Aurora. She rested her hands on the blonde's back and then rubs softly. Even now, she can't say it directly, though she had said it indirectly just a moment ago. I love you.
Why was it so hard, when it was probably the thing that Aurora needed to hear the most right now?
Aurora relaxed a little as Maleficent rubbed her back. The touch was...reassuring, and she needed that right now. She was tired and drained, and all she really wanted at the moment was this, just to hold and be held.
The older woman's lips pressed warmly against Aurora's forehead, before her nose nuzzled into her hair. "I am sorry," she repeated.
“I forgive you.” Aurora hugged Maleficent a little tighter. It didn’t make things go away, or fix them completely. But it felt like what to say.
Something warm made Maleficent uncomfortable. Something warm and wet on her cheeks. She hugged Aurora hard, still not trusting the situation to be better, still believing that in the end she would never get anything that made her happy. After all, who knew what became of her, after Aurora was crowned?