InsaneJournal

Who: Finn Mikaelson and Kol Mikaelson
When: Backdated: Sunday, August 10th. Late Evening
Where: A Bar
What: Finn isn't handling becoming a vampire well
Rating/Warning: PGish. Mentions of blood and thoughts of suicide
Status: Complete

Finn hadn’t been handling his transformation into a vampire very well. He’d gotten the hunger under control just enough that he was able to go back to work, but other than that, he rarely left his apartment. He’d gotten a temporary stock of blood, not wanting to actually bite anyone, but he hated having to drink it. It wasn’t like in the dreams where he had Sage, which made his life worth living and the more he thought about the dreams and his involvement in the spell that Esther had tried in order to reverse what she had done to her children, the more Finn thought that he might be able to use the White Oak Stake that had appeared the same morning he’d woken up as a vampire.

Of course when Kol had found out about this, he had insisted on helping Finn since he had also recently turned. And Kol’s way of helping was to take Finn to a bar. Of course as a vampire, it would take a lot more for him to get drunk, which he hadn’t been in a long time, but he was up for the challenge tonight.

The transition was hard on Kol too. He was constantly hungry, constantly looking at his girlfriend like she was his own personal buffett, so having somebody to deal with this with...well it was a blessing. He knew he could always reach out to Damon for help, but he needed his oldest brother right now, and right now, his older brother needed him. He couldn’t even begin to believe that Finn was contemplating suicide. Didn’t he know, didn’t he realize just how much he was needed? How much Kol needed him?

“Come on, the bar will be good for us both. We can get drunk and just forget we are a bunch of wretched, soulless monsters for one night. We’ll get through this brothers. Damon and Elena are managing. Why can’t we? According to the dreams we are more powerful than they are. Maybe adjusting will be easier for us.”

Finn didn’t really feel like going out, but he also didn’t want Kol to tell Rebekah or the others what Finn had been contemplating, so he’d agreed to go out with him despite the fact that he was also worried about his younger brother’s control. “First of all, none of us handle it very well in the dreams even after more than nine hundred years.” Finn and Elijah were probably the only ones of the five of them who had the most control over their vampiric nature. “I was helping our mother for a reason after all.”

“Do you think that...mom here is like in our dreams? That she wants us dead. I feel that often times dad wishes I was, or that Nik was, but to actually have them act on it?...I don’t want to believe they are capable of that. But if they hate us there, they’ll hate and abhor what we are here…” Kol shook his head, “and look. What you are….what you do in the dreams? It’s not you here. I dreamed that part too. You’re not a killer, Finn. Helping mother would not only kill you, but it would kill me. It would kill Damon and Elena, and you’re better than that.”

Finn shook his head as they went into the bar, “No, I don’t think our parents want to kill us in real life.” He could argue that their father might have wanted to kill him back when he was a junkie, but not now. Well, unless they found out that two of their sons were vampires. “We’re vampires, Kol. My definition, we’re killers.” He didn’t expect Kol or anyone else to understand why he had been ready to do what he’d done in his dreams, but none of them had been kept in a box by Klaus for nine hundred years or had the love of their life leave. “That was the plan, Kol. To link us, so we would then become human and die.” He didn’t know exactly what Kol was talking about by including Damon and Elena, not knowing that if an Original was killed so was their entire line.

“But if you link us together, you kill all vampires. That’s what mother wanted. In my dreams...after you died? It killed Sage and everyone in your line. Everyone she turned, Everyone they ever turned and so on and so forth? Die. It’s genocide Finn, that’s what it is. There are good vampires out there. We may have been...unhinged and well, in my case, an evil asshole, but there are others who aren’t. Who are good. We can get through this. I mean, sure, I’m struggling myself. Tatia smells...she smells so fucking good, but I could never hurt her, I love her. I’ll help you. I swear it.”

Finn hadn’t known about all of that, but it hadn’t happened. No, the ritual had been interrupted by Bonnie’s mother becoming a vampire and then Sage had returned. Sage. “She died?” Finn’s brows furrowed as he thought about the fact that not only was he the reason she’d become a vampire, but then he’d been the reason she’d died. He wanted to ask Kol how he kept from biting Tatia; how he controlled himself when there was a fresh blood supply so close, but instead he pulled his credit card out of his wallet and set it down on the bar top, “Two beers.” Finn just wanted to get very drunk.

“I’ll buy the next round,” Kol said as he took a swig of his beer. In truth, being out right now was probably a monstrously bad idea, but he needed to learn how to control it soon, or he’d lose his job at ESPN. “Yes, she died. That is what mother really wanted, Finn. Not just to end us, but to end all vampires because they went against the balance of nature or some shit like that. I imagine my entire line died out when Jeremy and Elena conspired to, and successfully killed me. Granted, dream me was a dick and kind of deserved it, but think about it, 10’s of thousands of vampires, linked to just one of them. All eradicated in the blink of an eye. It’s genocide.”

“It would have been for the best.” Finn took a sip of his beer, trying not to think of what it’d be like if something were to happen to Sage. He’d never even met her in real life, but he already felt extremely close to her and the thought of losing her hurt, “How many people died in the dreams because of vampires? Innocent people. Had the ritual not been interrupted, I would have gone through with it.” He didn’t look at Kol as he took another sip of his beer.

“Well, lucky for us, mother isn’t a witch here, isn’t it? Because I don’t intend on dying for you brother. I love you, but I won’t die for you. I have Tatia to think about. We will learn how to control this. We don’t have to be the people we were in our dreams. We will learn to control it. I mean, Damon and Elena seem to be doing okay. We can do okay too.”

Of course Finn knew that they were different people than they were in their dreams, but he still disliked being a vampire. He might not have been stuck in a box for nine hundred years, but considering how real the dreams were, it felt like he had. Glancing over at Kol, he sighed, "I don't expect you to. I'm sure I'll figure something out. Some way to deal with this." Finn didn't like having to use blood bags, because that was blood he was taking away from someone else who might need it, but for the time being there didn't seem to be any way around it, "What have you been drinking?"

“Blood bags. Damon has laced all of Tatia’s drinks with vervain, so I can’t feed from her. I don’t want to go the Interview with the Vampire route either and feed on rats, so it’s bloodbags for me at the moment. It tastes like ass, but I mean, what else can I do? I’m not going to eat my girlfriend, even if I could. I don’t know how to control myself yet. Damon says he can teach me, but I need to make sure it’s something that Tats is comfortable with first.”

“I hate using blood bags. I feel like I’m taking that blood away from someone else who might need it more,” Or course he didn’t want to drink from an actual human, because he liked that idea even less, “You would actually feel comfortable drinking from your girlfriend? What if you lost control? I could never do that.” He took another swig of beer, nearly emptying the bottle. Over the last couple of years, on the rare occasions when Finn would drink, he could usually make one drink last awhile, but this whole vampire thing was really affecting him and his control.

“Damon tells me the situation can be quite...pleasurable, but both people have to be willing participants, obviously. I haven’t gotten that far yet. All I know is that I’m hungry and this beer isn’t doing shit. I thought the beer was supposed to kill the cravings or dull them, but it’s not doing anything…” if anything, it was just making Kol more hungry and more agitated that he wasn’t drinking warm, hot coppery blood at this very moment.

“Damon thinks a lot of things.” In Finn’s opinion, Damon was trying to convince anyone from their dream world, who had become vampires to do things his way. Finn didn’t agree with that in the least. The alcohol was also not doing anything to calm Finn’s nerves and as he finished off his first drink, he ordered a second. Over the last six years, when Finn had a drink, it was usually just that, a drink. It was very rare that he’d have more than one, but being a vampire, he was pretty sure that it’d take more than this to get him drunk, so he was safe. For now.

~~

A few drinks later and Kol was feeling slightly tispy. Where was his magic vampire tolerance to alcohol? He wanted to drink people under the table and just be generally awesome. Being a vampire meant you had to be generally awesome.

“I dun thunk my powers are worping,” he slurred to his brother, looking up at him with a sullen pouty expression. “Is not far…”

Finn had lost count of the number of drinks he’d consumed, but he was sure it had surpassed half a dozen. It had been a long time since he’d drank as much as he had tonight. He vaguely recalled the bartender giving him a slightly concerned look at one point when he’d ordered another drink, probably concerned for Finn’s liver as well as his sobriety. “We’re not immune, brother.” Finn’s speech wasn’t quite as slurred as Kol’s, but it was quite clear that he’d been drinking. He may not have been drunk, but he certainly was hungry and as the wind shifted slightly he caught the scent of something that smelled particularly good, “Do you smell that?”

“Smells good,” Kol agreed nodding his head and walking over to his brother to clasp his shoulder. “I missed this. I missed you. You were my role model growing up and I always wanted to be like you,” okay so he was tipsy and sentimental. Right now, Lexi would probably tell him to stop being such a girl, but he didn’t care. He was with his brother and he was hungry. “Let’s go see what smells so good and taste it. Maybe it tastes even better than it smells?”

In the dreams Finn had never exactly been a predator like Klaus or Kol. He’d never really enjoyed biting people, but had done it to survive. In real life, Finn hadn’t wanted to bite anyone, knowing that there were other ways he could survive, even if he didn’t like those reasons either. However, after a couple of drinks, it was getting difficult to decipher right from wrong and whatever or whoever they were smelling was just too good to ignore. If he actually took the time to stop and think about it, this was how things with drugs had started. “Down there.” He pointed towards the corner where a woman stood.

Kol grinned like a kid in a candy store. Blood, sweet blood. It smelt so good, way better than the blood bags that Damon had been giving him. And it wasn’t as if they had to take ALL of it. Just some. Just a tiny sip and then they’d go home. “Shall we go taste? Just a tiny bit? It smells too good for her to keep it all to herself.”

Just a little bit. Just enough to take the edge off. Finn had heard that before and the rational part of him knew that a little was never enough. He was an addict and should have known better, but the intoxicated part agreed with Kol. "A little won't hurt." Whether he was talking about the woman or himself, Finn wasn't sure.

With a grin, Kol vamp speed in front of the woman, compelling her. “You aren’t going to run. You aren’t going to scream. You’re going to let my brother and I drink from you. We just want a taste. Your blood will sustain us and we will only take a little,” Kol murmured as he pushed the woman’s hair aside and sank his fangs into her skin gently, drinking the blood from her neck.

Finn followed his brother, watching as the younger Mikaelson compelled the woman. Personally, Finn would have gone into a little less detail, but Kol was also drunk and liked to talk, so it made sense. As Kol’s teeth sank into the woman’s neck, Finn felt his own teeth elongate and his eyes change as he moved closer, the scent of her blood getting stronger. He hesitated for only a moment before leaning and biting the other side of her throat, hot, thick blood washing over his tongue.

Kol would have grinned if he wasn’t busy drinking from the woman. He could feel her getting weaker and weaker, but he couldn’t stop. The blood was sustenance, and Finn was using up half of it, so he needed more, more more! Groaning, he tightened his grip on the girl, if they didn’t stop soon, she’d be dead, but Kol could not register reason and logic. Not right now. Not when he was so hungry.

Finn was in the same boat as Kol, but he was also listening to the woman’s heartbeat as he drank and as he heard it begin to grow fainter, he pulled his head back, blood dripping down his chin and onto his shirt. His fangs were still out and his eyes vampy, but as he slowly began to come down from his blood lust, both returned to normal and it hit him, like a truck, just what he had done. Releasing his hold on the woman so that her weight was all on Kol, Finn took a step back, “Oh god…” He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, eyes widening as he saw the blood there, “What did we do?”

“Huh?” Kol pulled away, coming down from his eye as he looked at the girl. She was pale and sickly and unresponsive. Oh God, did they kill her? Please tell him they didn’t kill her...he’d never forgive himself. More importantly, Finn would never forgive him for having Kol talk him into this. “I’m sure she’s fine…” he gently shook at the girl. “Hey...hey you. Say something. Anything. you’re still alive, aren’t you. Aren’t you?”

Finn watched as Kol shook the girl as he took another step back, “Oh god.” He suddenly felt sick to his stomach as he realized what they had just done. How they had just acted. How he had acted. He might have needed blood to survive, but he’d never let himself lose control in the dreams, but that’s exactly what had just happened. Without another word, Finn turned and was gone in a second.

“Finn, wait!” Kol shouted. He was about to run after his brother, but stopped when the girl stirred. Thank God. She was alive. Biting into his wrist, he fed her a bit of his blood before dragging her over to a corner for her to rest, compelling her to think that she had had too much to drink and had simply passed out. Once that was taken care of, he zoomed out of the club. He had to find his brother.