Rita is a nosy fucker. (acidink) wrote in valarcomm, @ 2014-09-09 12:47:00 |
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Entry tags: | rita skeeter |
Death of a Congressman
Well known and beloved former California State Congressman, [Name], was found dead in his home Tuesday morning. Officials say that the call came in at 4:45am from his campaign aid who was on site working with the Congressman on his upcoming campaign. Paramedics arrived on site within ten minutes, and he was pronounced dead in his home. Preliminary reports point to the death being ruled natural causes. It was common knowledge that the Old Man had a heart condition. The Congressman's wife, Effie Trinket, was away on a retreat at the time of the call, and has been unavailable for comment.
Of course, the campaign aid who called 911 in the case was barely legal, and alone in his house with the Congressman while his wife was away. First responders on the scene found her wearing nothing but one of his bath robes, and the Congressman himself was also naked in his bed, pitching a tent, covered only by a sheet.
This humble reporter has her own ideas about what the campaign aid was doing at the Congressman's house at such an ungodly hour. When the cat's away, the mice will play. Now we wait to hear a statement from the Congressman's young and beautiful wife about why an even younger and more beautiful woman was found in his bed on the day of his death.