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Marian Hawke sparked a rebellion ([info]kirkwallchamp) wrote in [info]utr_logs,
@ 2011-06-03 13:36:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:marian hawke, merrill

Who: Hawke and Merrill
What: Drinking games, and the aftermath thereof.
Where: Varric's mansion.
When: After Anders and Aveline show up.
Warnings: Slightly awkward situations, drunken kissing, that's about it.

The technology in this world never ceased to amaze Hawke. Some of it was like nothing they could've ever thought of in Thedas... these things called 'phones', for one, and definitely the wonder of fridges. Food that didn't have to be salted until it was all rubbery and gross? Amazing.

Unfortunately, technology also gave her even more reasons to drink. Anders was here, and he didn't recognise her as who she was? Utter, bastarding, cocking, Maker-forsaken world. She knew it shouldn't bother her too much, but being mildly inebriated wasn't enough to stop it hurting.

She threw her phone aside, sighing. Best to focus on yet more booze, and the lovely drunken elf currently with her, in her opinion. "Merrill? Want to try something new, or think you're too far gone?"


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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 02:32 pm UTC (link)
Merrill was pouting. She had told Hawke several times that she hoped Fenris would show up, even though he hadn't been the friendliest. Aveline, too, she sometimes mentioned missing. She wanted to see her old traveling companions... But she hadn't once mentioned hoping Anders would show up. And preferring the mage-hating Fenris to Anders really said something--though Anders had been almost as mean to Merrill as Fenris had, really. She was just an abomination to him. And Hawke loved him. Merrill could just about cry.

She'd been a little rude to him on the boards, and confused him rather thoroughly with her drunken ramblings. Then she'd pouted at Varric using the emoticons Merlin had taught her. Their dwarf friend was out for the evening, visiting his lady friend. Varric was nice. She liked him. She liked Aveline, too. It was nice she was here. And Isabela was sweet. And Hawke. She liked Hawke. A lot.

"Hm?" she perked up when Hawke addressed her, putting down her phone. "Gone? I haven't gone anywhere, I'm right here." There was a little slur in her voice, and she was talking a little louder than necessary.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 03:09 pm UTC (link)
Hawke chuckled softly and shook her head. "You and alcohol go together really well." She'd seen the slight rudeness on the boards, whilst skimming over things - just to check, because she often got insatiably curious whilst tipsy.

Sometimes curious in more ways than one too, but she was managing to behave herself tonight.

"What I meant was... well, want some more?" she was pretty sure Varric wasn't going to mind them raiding all his stuff. She could call it repayment for all the traumatic images he'd recently imparted on her. "I don't want you getting too drunk and passing out..."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 04:42 pm UTC (link)
"Oh!" Merrill said, understanding now. "Oh, sure. It doesn't taste so bad anymore." She smiled brightly at Hawke, feeling a bit better now. She wouldn't worry about him anymore. "I'll try not to pass out," she said cheerfully. "I feel really good right now." Except for Anders--more reason to be annoyed, really. He'd upset a perfectly good evening. She wouldn't let him ruin it, though.

"What game is next?" She hadn't understood what was meant by drinking games before, and had been sure she would lose miserably because she was bad at drinking. It turned out, any losing was followed by drinking. As such, she was a bit sloshed, but pleasantly so.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 04:56 pm UTC (link)
Hawke smiled, pausing to retrieve her phone so she could figure out what to 'play' next. This internet thing truly was amazing... which just kinda proved that some people in this world had too much time on their hands, but still!

"Huh, well... we could... there's this kinda thing about 'I've never done this', and if you have, you have to drink," she vaguely remembered playing something of the sort with Isabela once, alongside ending up on the floor a few hours later. Good times. "But knowing us, I'd be the one ending up passing out or doing something dirty if we did that."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 05:16 pm UTC (link)
"That sounds fun," Merrill said, sitting up straighter. "Well, you should catch up," she said with a giggle. "And there are some things you could say that I've done and you haven't," she said encouragingly. "Like...'I'm Hawke, and I've never seen Keeper Marethari naked,'" Merrill supplied, doing an impression of Hawke's voice and accent. She'd managed to keep a serious face during the impression, then she started to laugh again.

It had been completely innocent, of course. All in the duties of being the First.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 05:29 pm UTC (link)
Oh, Maker. Maybe it was the alcohol making her more immature than usual, but Hawke couldn't help but laugh. Sure, the mental image was terrible, but combined with Merrill's (rather impressive, in her opinion) impression of her... okay, this world was making up for being crap earlier.

"Do I even want to know?" she managed to get out, once she'd got her laughter mostly back under control. "I mean... that image just..." And she was back to giggling. For a Hero, she really never did well on the maturity front.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 05:52 pm UTC (link)
"Probably not," Merrill said, giggling. "It's not as interesting as what you're probably thinking now." She liked this side of Hawke. The Arishok and the Viscount would never see her like this. It made Merrill feel special.

"Do I need to drink for that?" She wasn't quite clear on the rules.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 05:59 pm UTC (link)
And Merrill certainly was special, to Hawke at least. All things considered, Anders was a bit of a dick, and not in anything close to a good way... looked good in black, though, if that counted in his favour.

"Considering I've never seen her naked and - Maker willing - never will? Drink up," the rules seemed pretty clear to her. If you've done it, you drink, if you haven't, you poke fun at the person who said it... okay, maybe she'd made up that last bit. "You get to get revenge on me, though."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 06:17 pm UTC (link)
Merrill picked up one of the many shot glasses on the table and knocked it back, getting it all in one drink. She was getting better at this. She still made a face, but it wasn't as bad as it used to be.

"Okay, so I try to make you drink now?" She put the empty glass down. "Okay. I have never.. Battled an Arishok and won." Yes, hers would probably be flattering. She thought very highly of Hawke.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 06:49 pm UTC (link)
"Cheater," that earned a genuine smile, though. Flattery was truly one of her favourite things. She picked up a glass, knocking it back - whilst she didn't pull a face, it certainly earned a shudder. The stuff here was stronger than it was in Thedas, it seemed.

"Now... I've never..." she bit her lip, setting down the glass and thinking. "I've never confused all of Kirkwall by not wearing shoes?" She paused. "That's a bit of a rubbish one, isn't it?"

Hey, at least she was aware of it.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 07:11 pm UTC (link)
"Is it? I don't know the rules." She giggled when Hawke shuddered. She tilted her head at Hawke's next one. "All of Kirkwall?" She looked down at her feet. The soles of her feel were covered! "These aren't shoes?" Well, it wasn't very good, but she supposed it counted. She stuck out her tongue at Hawke before taking the shot.

"I've never.. given me a halla statue." She smiled sweetly.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 07:29 pm UTC (link)
"They're enough to really confuse all the merchants in Hightown, at least?" Then again, running around with that apostate's mask she'd found in a chest at Gamlen's had probably confused them enough prior to that.

Well, that was an undeniable fact, as she'd thought it'd be a nice gift, so she took another shot. If it kept on at this rate, she'd be out for the count a little too quickly.

"I've never actually seen a halla. Statues excluded."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 07:52 pm UTC (link)
"Well, that isn't hard!" she declared. Most people in Hightown were easily confused, according to Varric, at least.

"You haven't?" she said, surprised. "Oh, you should! They're lovely creatures. Like you. Only..more legs." She tilted her head. "Oh, right," she said, remembering they were still playing the game. She took another shot. "I think I'm getting better at this," she said, noticing she wasn't making faces anymore. She was, however, slurring her words more.

"I've never slept with Anders." She hadn't intended to say that. In fact, she'd been actively resisting bringing it up. But now her inhibitions were wavering.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 08:06 pm UTC (link)
Hawke arched an eyebrow as Merrill drank. Seriously? Like her, but... with more legs? She chose to take that as a compliment.

She couldn't deny that, so she made sure to drink, but... it did lead to questions. Questions she couldn't help but ask. "Does Anders being here bother you? It shouldn't, really, because... he isn't my Anders. But you're my Merrill, which... means you're better than him. To me, anyway."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 08:35 pm UTC (link)
Merrill frowned a bit. That didn't sound like part of the game. She squinted at the shot glasses. Skipping that step, apparently. "But... Well, he's still the man you knew, only you aren't the man he knew. Woman.. He.. Didn't know? I don't know. But Varric is our Varric, even if he has a beard. And Isabela's the same, too, even though she thinks you like Fenris. They remember things different..ly.. But I still feel the same about them." Hawke would still feel the same about Anders, too. And even if Anders didn't like Hawke before, he probably would now. Who wouldn't fall for her, given the opportunity?

"I don't think I'm making sense anymore."

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 08:46 pm UTC (link)
Well, at least she knew that. "It's not the same, though. Anders is... not my Anders, but he is, but... it isn't like I can just fall in love with him all over again."

Maker, alcohol led to such awkward situations. "But... it's... you're my Merrill and..." she sighed, shaking her head. "If I loved any of you, it'd be you. Anders can go pine for his man-Hawke."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 08:58 pm UTC (link)
"But you already love him. That's why you were mad at your phone when he didn't remember you. If I loved you and then you said you didn't remember me, I would still love you. I wouldn't be able to just stop." She was probably making things worse, but she had to say this. Now she was worked up, nearly to the point of tears.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 09:05 pm UTC (link)
"Merrill..." Hawke gently took hold of her chin, forcing her to look her in the eyes. "I'll always love him in some way, I admit that, but... things change, don't they?"

She could realise, even in her current state of mind, what she was getting at. She'd known the elf'd had a sort of fangirlish crush on her at certain points, but it seemed like it'd developed into something a little more than that.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 09:30 pm UTC (link)
Merrill blinked back tears as she looked into Hawke's eyes. "I.." She wasn't sure what to say. Things change. She had been hoping things would change, and when Anders had showed up she was afraid things wouldn't change. Maybe...if Hawke wanted them to, they still would.

She didn't know what to think about her loving Anders. She wasn't sure how to compete with a man Hawke had lived with. "How big of a way?" she asked hesitantly.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 09:58 pm UTC (link)
"In as big of a way as you want it," it was definitely the alcohol, combined with Anders' sudden arrival, that was making Hawke so bold. Sure, she could be bold normally, but... romance always tended to trip her up.

And that boldness manifested, rather naturally, in her deciding that kissing Merrill was definitely the best course of action.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 11:10 pm UTC (link)
She blinked in surprise at the kiss, but she certainly didn't pull away. She kissed back, leaning in and tentatively touching Hawke's hair. She wasn't really sure of the right way to go about this. The 'basics' had been described to her, in a vague sort of way, but nothing told her where she should put her hands, or what she was supposed to do with her tongue.

Hawke was always a good leader, though.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-03 11:23 pm UTC (link)
To be honest, Hawke hadn't expected experience when it came to Merrill. The Dalish were a load of stick-in-the-muds when it came to stuff like this.

She gently took hold of her free hand, resting it on her hip, hoping she could take the right sort of hint. She wouldn't go for deepening the kiss until she was sure Merrill was ready for it - she might be drunk, but she was still considerate of stuff like that.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-03 11:44 pm UTC (link)
Merrill followed Hawke's non-verbal instruction, placing her hand on her hip and leaning in. Feeling a bit more confident, she tried to deepen the kiss herself by just sort of mashing her lips up more firmly against Hawke's.

She hadn't expected any of this, but... surprises were nice!

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-04 12:05 am UTC (link)
Hawke chuckled softly into the kiss, obligingly deepening it and pulling her a little closer for good measure. Seemed like if she led her right, Merrill could be quick learner, and she liked that.

By the Maker, she should've done this years ago.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-04 12:33 am UTC (link)
Merrill giggled a little as she was pulled closer. She probably shouldn't giggle. This was supposed to be serious! It was her first kiss. Was it still her first kiss? It was a very long kiss. She was just so happy! She was kissing Hawke. She giggled again, trying not to pull her lips away.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-04 12:48 am UTC (link)
Much as she didn't want to, Hawke pulled away, pouting slightly. She could never help but tease about things like that. "I can't be that funny to kiss... or maybe I am, I don't know, I've never really..."

She trailed off, before deciding that kissing her again was definitely the best course of action. She liked this, liked Merrill... maybe playing drinking games was the best idea she'd ever had.

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-04 04:34 pm UTC (link)
"I'm sorry!" she said when Hawke pouted. "It's probably because I'm--" Before she could say 'drunk', Hawke was kissing her again. That was just fine with Merrill. Why hadn't she and Hawke played games like this before? Well, aside from her being with Anders, and all... Merrill should've made a move earlier. But it was hard to regret anything while kissing the most amazing person she had ever known.

What would the Keeper say? Again with a little giggle into the kiss. Really, she wouldn't be gigging so much if she were sober. Probably.

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-04 08:20 pm UTC (link)
The giggling was actually pretty endearing in Hawke's eyes, whether it was drink-induced or not... and as much as she was getting very fond of this, she forced herself to pull away.

"I... think we should probably stop before we get too carried away," not that she would mind if they did, but she was sure Esmerelda would have enough to talk about from them simply deciding that drunken making-out was a good idea. "I really like this, though... really like you too, to be honest."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-05 05:34 am UTC (link)
"I like you, too. A lot," she bubbled. "I've thought about kissing you before," she confessed. "When I was sober, I mean. I like you." Stopping probably wasn't a bad thing, really. She didn't know how to get carried away.

"I'm tired, though. And sort of dizzy. I've never been dizzy while I was sitting down. Oh!" It was like their game. Had Hawke been dizzy while she was sitting down? The game was probably over, though. If Merrill drank any more, her body would probably shut down. As it was, she slid forward over the table, resting her cheek on her arm and looking up at Hawke. "You're pretty."

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-05 03:15 pm UTC (link)
Hawke smiled softly. Yeah, the drunkenness definitely added to how endearing Merrill could be... she made a mental note not to make a thing of this, though, because getting her drunk all the time would be a terrible idea.

"So are you. I've always thought that," she'd had immense good luck when it came to really pretty companions. Maybe it was the Maker's way of saying 'sorry I made your town explode with Darkspawn'. "Come on, I'll help you to bed. Sleeping on tables really isn't comfortable."

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[info]little_elf_lost
2011-06-05 10:13 pm UTC (link)
She smiled at the compliment, her eyes starting to close. Then Hawke helped pull Merrill to her feet. She leaned heavily against Hawke's side, wrapping her arms around the other woman's waist to hold on. Everything was swaying, and she knew that if Hawke let go, she would fall over. But she also knew Hawke wouldn't let go.

It was a good thing Varric had a bedroom on the first floor. When they'd reached the bed, Merrill pressed a kiss against Hawke's cheek. "Good night, Hawke."

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[info]kirkwallchamp
2011-06-05 10:33 pm UTC (link)
Much as you'd expect her not to, Hawke blushed slightly at the kiss. She could blame it on other things, if Merrill happened to remember when she sobered up... she doubted she would. That first hangover tended to wipe out most memories.

"Pleasant dreams, Merrill," she murmured, helping her onto the bed, just to be sure she didn't end up on the floor. Hopefully, Merrill wouldn't have weird dreams like Hawke herself sometimes did, especially after ending up here - that one with Varric in a tutu still disturbed her to this day.

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