InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "It's a samsquanch!"

Sophie Devereaux [Leverage] (worstactressevr) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2009-03-07 10:05:00

Entry tags:

nathan ford, sophie devereaux

Who: Sophie and Nate for now
What: She's going in the room.
Warnings: Screaming. possible violence. Hopefully no death.

She shouldn't go in there. She knew it was a stupid idea, Eliot and Parker said it was a stupid idea, Hardison probably agreed and was just keeping his mouth shut. Even if Nate was in a good mood it'd not be a smart plan, and right now he was liable to pick a fight. Which may be why she was going in there. Everyone else would have their chance to be annoyed at him later once they were done this little exercise, and she'd be the supportive one balancing that out. Now was her chance to express her anger at what he was doing to himself.

Making sure he wasn't near the door, she opened it quickly and stepped inside the room, leaving the door slightly ajar - enough to slip out just as quickly if he rushed her as soon as he saw her, but closed enough that she could pull it shut if it seemed he'd be going for escape. Crossing her arms, she just looked at him.

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sassdoesnthelp
2009-03-07 09:58 am UTC (link)

Nate stood at the far side of the room, his back to the door. he didn't even glance back, when the door opened. He didn't need to look, to know it was Sophie. Eliot would have been mouthing off, rushing him without waiting for a response. Parker and Hardison would both try to reason with him, but Sophie. Sophie would come in quietly, stand there watching him, waiting for him to respond to her.

He knew them all, knew how they worked, what they could do, what they would do in most any situation. True he'd over looked the potential to kidnap him, but in the end he didn't blame them. Knowing he was out of control didn't make giving up the control he did have any easier. He felt lost, without a bottle, a glass, in his hand. Drinking helped soothe more than the pain of losing his son, being betrayed by the company he worked for, rejected by his wife. Drinking dulled his senses, and let him sleep in a blissfully numb fog. Drinking helped him deny the feelings he was feeling, the things he was afraid to admit, even to himself.

"I hope you brought whiskey," he said to Sophie after a long moment of attempting to wait her out.

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worstactressevr
2009-03-07 10:10 am UTC (link)

Oh, good. Attitude. Not that she wasn't expecting it. "Oh, I must have left my flask in my other coat. I thought maybe we could nip down to the local bar."

Content for the moment that he wasn't planning on attacking her, she pulled the door shut behind her, effectively locking them both in until the others came back from their doughnut run, and leaned against the padding of the wall. He looked like hell... and more than that, he looked like he felt like hell. A part of her ached to convince him that this really was the best thing, but it was overshadowed by the part that wanted to scream at him for letting it get this bad.

"Answer to all life's problems, right Nate?"

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sassdoesnthelp
2009-03-07 10:20 am UTC (link)

"Hardly a cure, but it does ease the ache of injustice. You should try it. I bet you'd like it." He turned around, faced her with his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes were dull, his color pale. He knew he was as far down as he could go, and the only way out was to crawl back up. Drinking was a crutch, he used it liberally, and he wasn't ready, even after the forced detox, to give it up.

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	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 10:50 am UTC (link)
	"Then we could both wander around reeking like a distillery. I'm sure things would work great." She wanted to ask what injustice was so dire that he needed to do this to himself, but - she knew the answer, and it wasn't someplace she wanted to go. caring and understanding were for another day. "You look like hell." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 02:51 pm UTC (link)
	"That's what not drinking does for a guy," Nate replied, voice low and dead pan. "Get me a drink and I'll perk right up." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 03:00 pm UTC (link)
	"We both know you're not talking me into getting you a shot of anything, Nathan. You might as well stop asking." He wasn't even being particularly ornery, and he was already annoying her. "And we both know what it takes until you're out. If you want to kill yourself then, maybe we'll let you." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 03:03 pm UTC (link)
	"You would help me, if you really cared about me," Nate said, turning his back to her. He bent his head, hair falling agianst his face. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 03:08 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, that was all she needed. "Oh, you bastard!" Her arms uncrossed, fists curling lightly as she took one step towards him. "We do this because we care! Maybe if you cared about anything but wallowing in your own misery, you'd not drink yourself to death!" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 03:30 pm UTC (link)
	"Oh. I'm the bastard." Nate spun around on his heels to face her. His arms went out, not quite connecting with her face. His eyes were wild, unfocused. "You're the one keeping me here like some kind of criminal, and I'm the bastard." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

worstactressevr
2009-03-07 03:55 pm UTC (link)

Instinctively her head snapped back to avoid his hands, and her eyes flashed dark. "Don't you dare. Yes I'm keeping here. What part of "It hurts to watch you kill yourself slowly" do you not understand, Nathan? You were getting bad before, but since you've been here? You're worse. When you sober up, and you're able to make a decisions again without the whiskey deciding for you? If you want to go back to drinking like afish all day that's fine. I'll walk away."

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	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 06:11 pm UTC (link)
	If he'd had something to throw, he would have thrown it, Lacking anything he could project across the room, he slammed his fist into the wall. The impact bruised his knuckles, and left no mark on the wall. Nate growled, a sound more wounded dog than human. "Go. Get out of here. Get away from me." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 06:38 pm UTC (link)
	"Oh, You'd like that, wouldn't you. If I walked out that door and never turn around, leaving you to drown yourself? Well, It's not happening. Though right now I wish I could." Unwilling to back down, she moved closer to him, arms crossing again as she leaned against the wall next to where he punched it. "Can you t least admit you have a problem?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 06:42 pm UTC (link)
	"Yes. Yes, Sophie. I have a problem," Nate said, dark eyes burning. "My problem is you." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 06:44 pm UTC (link)
	"Don't blame me, Nate. You were drinking before I was here!" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 06:47 pm UTC (link)
	Nate offered no response to that, but slumped against the wall, and slid down to the floor, hands over his face. She'd probably be able to connect the dots, from that reaction, but he no longer cared. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 07:00 pm UTC (link)
	She watched him for moment, getting that niggling sensation of not trusting her reaction again. Sighing, she moved to crouch in front of him, one arm resting across his knee as the other moved his hand away from his face. "Nathan." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 07:06 pm UTC (link)
	This time he did hit her, though not combative, more annoyed, shoving her hand away. "Leave me alone." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 07:12 pm UTC (link)
	"Can't. We're locked in." She took his hand again, lightly holding it in hers as she offered the barest hint of a smile. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 07:19 pm UTC (link)
	He tipped his head back until it hit the wall. "Great. What happens if the three amigos don't come back?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 07:21 pm UTC (link)
	"You're locked in here forever with me? I'm sure there are worse fates." In actuality, she had her phone, so if they took too long she could get one of them to return, but she doubted it'd come to that. "They'll be back. I believe they've a bet going on as too which of us survives." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 08:18 pm UTC (link)
	"They think I'd hurt you?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 08:23 pm UTC (link)
	"Who says they're worried about me?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 08:30 pm UTC (link)
	"I know they're not worried about me. Probably hoping you put me out of my misery." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 08:42 pm UTC (link)
	"Nate. They're worried about you. Can't you see that? They had this whole thing planned before I was even here." Keeping a hold of his hand, she moved a bit to his side, kneeling on the floor as she faced him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 09:31 pm UTC (link)
	"They have no idea." Nate shook his head. "They mean well, but they're...misguided." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 09:32 pm UTC (link)
	"We're a mess without our leader. How about me, Nate. Am I misguided too?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 09:47 pm UTC (link)
	Nate tipped his head back to the wall again. "Your leader isn't much of a leader, these days." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	"That's why we want him back." Sophie sighed, realizing she as copping out using the team as her excuse. Leaning a bit closer, she traced his jaw lightly with a finger. "Forget the team for a moment." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-07 10:13 pm UTC (link)
	Nate didn't say anything for a moment. He pulled in a shaky breath, and leaned in, softly kissing her lips. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-07 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	Oh. She sighed as his lips touched hers, shoulders dropping as if a weight were lifted, and she leaned into the kiss just a bit, her palm cupping his cheek. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 11:07 am UTC (link)
	Nate sighed softly, unwilling to break the kiss. He shifted, moving a little closer to her, adjusting his legs to bring her closer to him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-08 01:29 pm UTC (link)
	That small bit of urging was all she needed, and she shifted to leaned against him, fitting quite well against his chest, only breaking the kiss when breathing became necessary. "Oh, Nate." She dropped her head to his shoulder as she looked at him, easily able to ignore the hellish appearance. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 04:19 pm UTC (link)
	"Sophie," Nate replied, pressing his forehead to hers. He moved his hand, fingers curling around her neck, just holding her to him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-08 05:05 pm UTC (link)
	"I can't do it any more. I'm sorry about all of this..." Sophie waved her arm to indicate the room, "but I can't stand and watch you destroy yourself, Nathan." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 05:10 pm UTC (link)
	"I'm not destroying myself, Sophie. I had it under control. These kids. They're young. They got the wrong idea. Their concern is touching, but it was misplaced." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

worstactressevr
2009-03-08 05:17 pm UTC (link)

"No. No you didn't. It was worse. You were a mess. And when you're a mess, they're a mess. I'm a mess." She sighed, tilting her head back a bit to look at him, her eyes sad. She didn't have the right to ask him to stop it for her but he did deserve to know how she felt. "If it's under control, forced sobriety for a bit of time shouldn't be a problem. Insulting maybe, but you can handle it. And if you leave and decide to start the downward spiral again, that's your choice. But Nate... I have to tell you that if it gets to be like it was when I arrived? I don't think I'll be able to work with the team." Or him.

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	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 05:55 pm UTC (link)
	"Did you ever consider that maybe it was as bad as it was because you weren't here?" Honesty time, and Nate looked something like a wounded dog, as he looked at her. "I'm still dealing with my son's death, the fall out from my marriage. This team is all I have, and without you, there is no team." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-08 06:12 pm UTC (link)
	"I... did not." She nodded as she listened, fingers idly playing with the neckline of his shirt. "No one's saying you've not got a lot to deal with. But we don't want to be shoved out. It's not just a team anymore. Let us help. Please?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 07:01 pm UTC (link)
	Nate nodded. "Let me out of this room before I climb the walls and I'm make an honest effort. Hold my hand from time to time and I just might make it." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-08 07:27 pm UTC (link)
	She nodded slowly. "It's not up to me, but we can see what the others say. And you ought talk to Hardison, and makes things right." She reached for his hand and squeezed it lightly. "As long as you're trying, it will be ok." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-08 09:03 pm UTC (link)
	Nate just nodded and let his head fall back to the wall. he was tired, despite the fact he'd been doing nothing but sit and pace the room and sit some more, for several days. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-09 01:56 am UTC (link)
	"Want me to get one of the others to come back now and open up?" She shifted a bit so that she was sitting beside him as opposed to laying on him, her arm snaking around him to tug him close, pulling his head onto her shoulder. There was little wonder he was tired... they'd run him through the emotional wringer. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-09 08:40 pm UTC (link)
	Nate shook his head. "Just sit here with me until they come back on their own. No need to cut their fun short." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	worstactressevr 2009-03-09 09:23 pm UTC (link)
	"Alright." She nodded a bit, tilting her head to kiss his brow almost maternally, and simply sat with him, holding his hand. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	sassdoesnthelp 2009-03-09 10:04 pm UTC (link)
	He slid his arm around her and just held her to him, content for the moment to just sit like that, and wait for the others to return. (Reply to this) (Parent)