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Faith Lehane ([info]rogue_slayer) wrote in [info]utr_logs,
@ 2008-08-02 00:12:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:buffy summers, faith lehane

Who: Faith and Buffy
What: Buffy tracking Faith's ass down
When: Tonight
Where: Some dive bar in New York
Warnings: Mean Girls had nothing on Buffy and Faith



Faith didn't understand why everyone was freaking out. It wasn't like she left town and didn't tell anyone where she was going like Solvei and Dean did. Just because she didn't care to bleed all over everybody didn't mean that she needed a babysitter to come out and find her and drag her home. It was times like these that Faith wished Emily knew how to keep her damn mouth shut rather than sending Buffy out to find her. If only Emily knew about Faith and Buffy's history, she might have thought better of it.

Whatever. Faith didn't care. She was still around. She'd offered to help Dean with the vampire problem he and his dad were having. She'd even taken care of a business problem that Emily couldn't manage on her own. She was keeping an eye on things, keeping shit together. It was better than the Faith of old could ever claim.

Sometimes a girl just needed to strike out on her own. For as long as she could recall, Faith had always been a solitary creature by nature but somehow over the years she'd molded herself into part of a unit. First, her and Sol had taken up on the road on their own and before long they'd acquired Sam. After that, Dean and Emily soon followed. If you figured in all of the people who came and went from their lives with a certain amount of frequency like Xander, Grace and Kennedy you could almost say Faith wasn't solitary at all but rather social. It just wasn't true, yet somehow she'd found herself where she was.

Correction. She had found herself where she was.

Faith was starting to realize something very important. The last world? That other world where she was staying. The one where she had friends and a family and people who knew her well enough to like her but didn't know her well enough to hate her cared about her. That was the illusion. This world? The one that resembled something closer to hell. This was the real world.

Solvei asked her when her business had become none of Sol's concern. Faith didn't say as much but she wanted to point out that her friend didn't know Faith half as well as she thought she did.

As long as Faith could believe that she was surrounded by fakes, by evil twins or whatever it was that this universe seemed to have in spades, she didn't have to worry about anyone but herself. It was just plain easier to write off Grace as some other alternative to her sister, to stay away from Emily and the new guy she was dating, to let Dean and Sol work their shit out themselves.

She was sure she could deal with it all if Buffy Summers didn't happen to be in town at the same time. And as luck would have it (or not have it in this case) it was the Buffy from her universe.

"What do you want?" She said plainly as Buffy sat down next to her at the bar. "I thought I told you to get lost."



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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 07:28 pm UTC (link)
When they finally stopped rolling, Buffy held her down while she straddled Faith down on the pavement. Holding onto her arms, she kept her eyes on her. How could Faith even ask why Buffy cared or not? And the whole losing it thing? Yeah, Faith was losing it. The brunette slayer struggled beneath Buffy, but she wasn't budging. At least with Faith down on the ground and kinda stuck, Buffy wouldn't be getting hit in the nose every five seconds from a slayer who couldn't keep her hands to herself.

"You know what? I don't. You being a bitch? It's nothing new, I don't even know why I bothered," Buffy said and if she could take it back, she could, but right now, she was really angry.

Moving away, Buffy scrambled to her feet wiped her face. Grabbing her stakes that found their way to the ground, she slid them in the inside pocket of her coat and watched Faith as she got up.

She didn't know what she was going to tell Emily considering she was the reason why Buffy went looking for her. After the whole 'get lost' thing, Buffy wasn't exactly going out of her way to make friends with Faith.

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[info]rogue_slayer
2008-08-02 07:55 pm UTC (link)
"God, I am so fucking tired of this. You wanna know why I told you to get lost?" Faith yelled after Buffy, watching as the other slayer turned around and looked at her. "Because I'm tired of watching you walk away. Okay? I'm through with it. And if that means being through with you. But you just couldn't give it to me, could you?" She asked.

"You just had to come out here and twist the fucking knife. Thanks for that, by the way. You're a real pal. Can't imagine why I wouldn't wanna get together and talk about old times. Jesus, Buffy, do you even remember any of it? You just come waltzing into town actin' like we're best friends. I'm not stupid. I know you're alone here. I know that Willow and Spike and Angel and Giles and everyone else are back in whereverville. I'm the only thing you've got." She practically spat at her, not even stopping to think about how much she was saying.

She knew she'd be angry at herself later for saying so much. She'd spent too long keeping it all inside but when she would recall this conversation tomorrow morning, she would wish she could take every word back. To keep that wall up. To keep Buffy out.

"So go ahead. Do what you're best at and just walk away. I don't need you anymore."

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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 08:18 pm UTC (link)
The more and more Faith talked, the more that Buffy just wanted to run. Mostly because Faith was right. She was alone here. She didn't have anyone and the moment she saw Faith, she latched onto her and that was wrong, given their past, but Faith was all she had. Or thought she had. When Buffy found out that Faith went on the road with Solvei and Dean, Sam and Emily, she was jealous and that was pretty much the last time that she saw her save for one or two times, but they didn't really get to talk.

"So this is how it is? If I stay, you tell me to get lost, but if I go, then I'm just doing what I always do." Buffy's voice was quiet as she turned around and looked at Faith, sadly.

"If you don't to be around me, then fine. You'll get your wish and then some," Buffy said bitterly, wanting to add, 'but if you want me, then just tell me.' She really didn't want to walk away, but Faith wasn't leaving her much choice.

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[info]rogue_slayer
2008-08-02 08:54 pm UTC (link)
"Why would I want you to stay? I know it's only temporary until something better comes along." Faith shook her head at Buffy. Suddenly wishing she'd decided to just stay home with Emily. At least Emily was nice and soft, always going out of her way to make it better. But Emily didn't get Faith, at least not really. Not like Buffy did.

She wondered if that was what was always tearing them apart.

"I deserve better than that. I'm not who I used to be and I'm not just gonna be another person who can't say no to you. So I'm saying no. Because I know if I say yes, we'll just happen like we happened before and before I know it, you're disappeared. It's easier if you just go now."

Faith didn't know why she was being so honest but it was still pissing her off so she decided to ignore it and turned her back, heading in the opposite direction. Buffy could watch her walk away for once.

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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 09:08 pm UTC (link)
Buffy just watched her walk away, a little stunned at everything Faith just said. How could she ... what kind of world was this when Faith of all people made Buffy feel like the lowest person on earth, all from LIES. Only temporary? The only thing that tore Buffy and Faith apart was the fact that Faith went evil and terrorized her friends for a while, while trying to kill her at the same time. But, the thing that really ended the relationship was the fact that Buffy kinda stabbed her and Faith went into a coma.

Usually it was Faith chasing after Buffy, but tonight, big sister decided to do all the running and it wasn't long until she caught up with her.

"I'll go," she started and grabbed onto Faith's shoulder, turning her around to look her at her. "But not before I tell you that you're the reason 'this' never worked out. You're the one that left me. It wasn't the other way around."

Of course, Faith didn't leave her leave her, she pretty much meant that Faith turned to the other side and Buffy couldn't go with her.

"So yeah. Walk away. You win and I'll leave you alone."

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[info]rogue_slayer
2008-08-02 09:33 pm UTC (link)
Faith just glared at Buffy. She was the one who went away? She was the one begging to be let in and realizing she was never going to outdo Angel. He was always gonna belong to Buffy and vice versa. She was too wrapped up in it and couldn't break free. Faith was looking for solid ground and Buffy hadn't given it to her.

So she'd lied and she'd murdered and she'd hurt people. It wasn't justified, she knew it and most days she didn't think Buffy would ever forgive her. Faith just couldn't let go of the anger surrounding Buffy's refusal to give up on Angel. To move on.

"You're trying to tell me it didn't have anything to do with Angel. Or with Spike, when I came back to help you with your First Evil problem?" Faith's voice had lost all of the bitterness. She didn't know why. She was just tired of fighting all of a sudden. All of a sudden, she wanted to go home.

"You hungry?"

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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 09:40 pm UTC (link)
Buffy pouted a little and kicked at the ground before looking up at Faith. She didn't know what Faith wanted to hear and whatever Buffy said, she was probably just gonna say it wrong, so she didn't want to say anything. But she had to, just because she had to ... try. Besides, Faith was pretty well onto the whole 'Buffy language' thing and what Buffy said sometimes meant something totally different.

"There's a lot of things that happened that you weren't around for and I'm ..." She just stopped and shrugged. She wasn't really hungry, but she could go for something because she was already down from the whole slaying thing. Usually it built her up but she just hit the ground so fast.

"Yeah, sure, let's go get something," she said and walked along side Faith.

"Angel was an important person in my life," she clarified calmly. And an important person in Faith's life too and that was something that Buffy knew she could never touch and it scared her more than anything. "Spike ... he was just at the right place at the right time or whatever and ..." she just trailed off. She couldn't help who she fell for and that was that. She felt she didn't have to justify any of her actions.

"What are you in the mood for?"

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[info]rogue_slayer
2008-08-02 09:48 pm UTC (link)
Faith just glanced over at Buffy when she mentioned that Angel was an important person in her life. Fair enough. Faith was too short sighted to see it back then but she couldn't even hate on Angel. He'd saved her when no one else was willing to get their hands that dirty. Spike though? She was a little more iffy on him. Right place, right time. Whatever.

"It doesn't really matter but there's a decent Chinese place right around the corner." Faith explained, opting to ignore Buffy's statements about the vampires in her life. Well, at least Faith could rest assured that neither of them had ended up here. Yet. She hadn't exactly been expecting Buffy or Xander either and here they were.

The two of them walked inside the small place and Faith's stomach almost immediately grumbled when she caught a whiff of the spring rolls. She ordered what she wanted and waited on Buffy in one of the small plastic booths. The place was a dive but Faith didn't care. Some weeks she lived on greasy, cheap Chinese food.

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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 09:55 pm UTC (link)
Buffy ordered some fried rice and sat down across from Faith in one of the booths. Buffy took the whole not replying about the vampire situation as a sign that the conversation was finally done. She was relieved. They sat there in silence for a few minutes and Buffy glanced over at the few people that were in the small restaurant before looking back at Faith.

Emily was the one that asked her to go and look for Faith and she did even though she didn't want to, but now? She was glad she did. At least they got some things (or Faith did) off their chests and Buffy could understand a bit more from where Faith was coming from. She should have seen it, but Buffy was too selfish to notice before.

"So, you think tonight I'll get to finally see your place?" Buffy asked, a small smile forming on her lips until Faith just looked at her and it pretty much said a big 'hell no.' She wasn't going to press it anymore. Faith didn't want to bring her by, Buffy didn't wanna be where she wasn't wanted, which was funny because being here, she felt more alone than ever.

"Alright, so I'll stop bugging you about that, but someday I wanna see it."

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[info]rogue_slayer
2008-08-02 10:10 pm UTC (link)
"Nope." Faith said quickly, popping a spring roll into her mouth and giving Buffy a look. There was no way in hell Faith was bringing Buffy to her house. First of all, she lived in the whorehouse. Even if Buffy wasn't a cop which she was. And even if what Faith was doing was completely illegal, which it was. She still didn't want Buffy to see it because Buffy was likely not to understand.

Besides that? Emily lived there and the further Faith could keep the two of them apart, the better. It was just.... better that way. Faith didn't want Em running her mouth to Buffy.

"How's the whole cop thing going?" She asked idly as she continued stuffing her face. Now the only thing Faith needed was a stiff drink and the night wouldn't be so bad after all.

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[info]littlebufferin
2008-08-02 10:17 pm UTC (link)
"It sucks, I think I'm gonna quit to be honest," Buffy said as she poked around at her rice. "I mean, yeah I like going to catch the bad guys but mainly I just give out stupid tickets and that's boring." She gave Faith a look and went back to her rice. "They don't let me drive anymore either," she said and took a bite before sipping on her diet coke.

"I'm here if you need me, Faith," Buffy said suddenly and just looked at her for a second before going back to her rice. She meant it to. No matter what and it wasn't just because Faith was all she really had, but she just wanted to let Faith know that out of all the friends she did have here, she didn't have to feel so alone all the time. Buffy knew very well that they didn't know Faith like she did, so Buffy just wanted to make sure that Faith knew she was there.

Buffy didn't say anything else really, she just finished up her rice and watched as Faith finished up all of her food.

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