Going inside and giving in to pleasures of the flesh was Alex's gut response. He tampered it down. It wasn't appropriate. Going that route without discussing things would lead to more frustration and a bigger rift between them than there was now.
Alex knew he had to play this just right. His future with Michael was at stake. They were teetering on the edge of a very steep cliff. The fall would be treacherous, the landing near impossible to survive. Alex needed to make sure they didn't go careening down into the abyss.
He drew a breath. "I'm not sure," he admitted because it was the truth. It wasn't a cop out, or stalling for more time. He really didn't know where to begin, he just knew that they had to start somewhere. "I know you know you drive me crazy. But here's the thing, Michael. Being away from you, knowing that there's this...whatever it is," he gestured at the ground, "between us. It's killing me."
He'd been with Michael at Caulfield, when he'd found his mother. He was there the moment Michael realised he couldn't save her. That he had to save himself. He'd tried so hard to push Alex away, and Alex understood that. He really did. He hadn't allowed it to happen then, he wasn't going to allow it to happen now, either. He was here to fight for the man he loved, even as Michael fought himself.