InsaneJournal

Who: Finley Melville & David Ryan; later, Erik von Brandt
What: They've been 'celebrating' David being alive and well since he got back from his kidnapping; it was only a matter of time before they got a little too careless. (Part 2 of 2)
Where: David's dressing room
When: Saturday night, June 9th 2018, after a REDO concert
Warnings: Pretty solid porn rating, until it's not (ctrl+f 'At last, the horror that had frozen Erik' to skip straight to the breakup angst). Specific warnings for: unprotected sex



As worked up as he already was, that one finger tracing the small of his back did more to sooth David’s edges than anything else had that day, edges he’d developed since his time in Tony’s creepy serial killer basement. For just one moment, he forgot about pushing the rest of the way back, closed his eyes and took a few shallow breaths, focusing on Finley’s voice and the achingly gentle touch of his finger. David might have never paid attention to something like that before, but now, it was the only thing keeping him grounded. The one thing he could reach for while he still felt lost in the dark, unable to find his way out.

It was strange. Thanks to Cadence, David had walked away from that experience being tortured by a psychopath with the worst of his injuries gone completely from his body, disappearing without a trace. Except that sometimes David thought he could still feel them, kind of like phantom pains. Every part of his body that Finley put his hands on felt raw to the touch, like the wound was still right beneath his skin, and the only thing that soothed them was feeling the warm, comforting familiarity of Finley’s hands on him.

Panting hard, David gave up any pretense of trying to brace himself for it and put most of his weight on his elbows, leaning his head down to rest against the table as he shuddered around Finley. A low whine caught in the back of his throat as he pushed himself back fully onto Finley’s cock then, gritting his teeth and pressing his forehead harder into the table with the shock that rippled through his entire body, followed swiftly by a pleading moan. After that brief bout of pain, everything was suddenly warmer, and wetter, the slide of Finley’s cock into his ass smoother than David could ever remember, and now every inch of it was inside him. Shoulders hunched and shivering, David rasped in a strangled voice, “Fuck me.”

Once, Finley might have purred something to him about asking nicely or the magic word; it was the game that they played, him and David, whether David liked it or not. It was the way that Finley had stayed in control of their fucking, those quips that let David know that even in the midst of driving David out of his mind Finley could stay calm and collected enough to joke about what they were doing.

All Finley could manage was a gasped "yes" with David shivering like that against him, and under his hands, and around him. Everything about it was intense in a way that nothing had ever been intense before. It had to be his imagination, Finley told himself. There was no logical explanation for why this would suddenly be different than everything they'd done before. It wasn't like they hadn't fucked since he'd gotten David back from that basement and it wasn't like Finley hadn't used fucking to try to say everything he couldn't possibly have the words to say out loud—that he was glad he was back, glad he was there for Finley to touch, glad that Finley had the chance to try to replace every memory David had of Tony's hands on him with memories of Finley's instead, bringing pleasure instead of pain.

Finley drew his hips back and fucked into him again with a strangled groan, the slide of it different in a way that Finley couldn't name but that he found himself obsessed with. It was more sensitive, warmer; the position maybe, except that they'd fucked in the very same position more than once before.

In a choice between analyzing why fucking David felt so good and doing it, doing it was going to win every time. Finley's hips moved in a familiar rhythm that hadn't even started to become boring, fucking David just the way that Finley knew he liked it best.

David thought he was going to crawl out of his own skin. Having Finley so deep inside him that David couldn’t tell where he ended and Finley began was like the best and worst feeling all at once, driving David completely out of his mind and making him want more. Everything about the way Finley felt inside of him felt so sinfully good that David couldn’t pretend it wasn’t making him crazy, the sounds beginning to spill out of his mouth once Finley started fucking into him as pleading and as desperate as he felt.

It felt like the warmth of Finley’s cock and the heat of his ass were working together to make David so out of his mind that he couldn’t think straight, the explosion of heat where Finley and David’s bodies met more intimate than anything David had ever experienced. With Finley inside him like this, he felt close enough to reach in David and take out all the parts that were wrong. All the hurt, the pain, the bad memories from things that had happened to him in his life that he couldn’t let go of, everything David hated about himself, Finley was so close to him now that he could just reach inside him and scoop them out.

He welcomed it. In the moment, David was so outside of himself that there was no room for pretense, no holding anything back for the sake of not appearing too vulnerable. Finley had already seen him at his most vulnerable, naked and strapped to a table, covered in his own blood. That memory only flashed in David’s mind for a moment before it was gone again, forcibly shut out by the agonizing rhythm of Finley fucking him that was rapidly turning David into a giant puddle of shudders and moans as he completely gave himself over to the demon, no guards up or any inhibitions left in the younger man now.

WIth a low cry, David lifted himself up on his elbows and curled his back to the motion, straining against every thrust from Finley with barely contained anticipation. It was so good he almost couldn’t stand it, and David haphazardly moved one arm to push his shirt up higher on his back, so Finley could see every inch of what he was doing to his body, the way David was keyed to respond to every touch from him.

Finley's breath rasped low and harsh at the sight of even more of that familiar, beautiful skin. His fingers had traced it so many times that he knew the placement of each mole, each tiny scar invisible unless you'd found it by touch first and knew where to look. He wanted to rake his nails over it and leave faint pink stripes to prove that Finley was there and he'd touched David places that no one touched unless they were invited. He wanted to bite and suck the shape of his mouth onto the furrow between David's shoulderblades, right over his spine.

If it wasn't for the fact that he'd have to give up some of the leverage he needed to keep fucking David the way he needed to, Finley might have given in to the urge. There was a very vocal part of him that resented every touch, every mark, the demon who'd taken David had believed himself entitled to bestow, and resented it enough that he wanted to cover every inch of him with his own marks to reclaim his territory.

As for the doppelganger who'd worn his own face to seduce David away from the restaurant where Finley had waited for him... Finley had called in a few favors to make certain that he could find him and deal with him all by himself. He'd made it personal.

"That's it, darling, that's so good..." Finley nearly whimpered while he pushed himself back into the heat of David's body, again and again. A hundred unmurmured thoughts choked him before any other words could follow, nothing about how badly he'd needed him and how he'd felt when David was gone and he didn't know if he'd ever get him back. He let his hips speak for him instead, a harder and faster rhythm than he'd started with.

David’s only response to the encouragement was a grunt, followed by a softer moan that dissolved into a string of desperate sounds that he wasn’t even fully aware he was making. The harder, faster rhythm of Finley’s hips ramming into him and cock driving into his body made David ache as he thought he could actually feel every inch of Finley inside him, making his head spin and nearly lose track of where he was.

He held on, wanting to stay in the moment for as long as he possibly could, because right now being with Finley like this was the only thing that made sense. He still had the nightmares, and even when he wasn’t alone David would often still suddenly find himself back in that basement, the isolation and fear washing over him all over again. He was short with everyone, even Hannah, easily agitated and prone to panic attacks. Some would probably call what he had PTSD, but David wasn’t bothering with any doctors.

He couldn’t deal with anything, or anyone. Anyone except Finley.

With everything that had happened, David had never actually gotten around to telling Finley the whole story. He’d told Finley about the demon who’d looked like him, about the trap he’d fallen into. Even about the kissing, as much as he knew it would piss Finley off. What David hadn’t told Finley about was the moment of doubt, however brief, when he thought that it had actually been Finley who had betrayed him.

Maybe trust had never come very easily for them before, but now things were different, at least for him. Finley had come to his rescue. No games, no lies, no tricks. He’d been there when David had needed him the most. Every touch from Finley now was another reminder of that, only making David’s desire to be as physically close to him as humanly possible that much more raw. Arching his back with a groan, his thighs trembled with the sheer force of every slap of Finley’s hips against his ass, the excruciating impact every time he pushed into David’s body again causing David to grip hard to the edges of the table with both hands, his own cock hard and dripping pre-come.

If Finley were to go deaf the very next day he knew that he'd still remember those sounds that David made when he fucked him the way he needed it for the rest of his very long life. If David had never made it out of that basement...

There were a lot of things that Finley would have remembered for the rest of his life but they'd all have been tinged with unpleasantness, the way it all ended tainting every blissful moment before. That just made Finley grip on tighter now and commit himself to remembering every moment a little more clearly. Something whispered in his mind that it didn't matter what he did or how tightly he held on, David would be gone soon enough. Time hadn't begun to stretch so that years felt like seconds yet the way that they had for Crowley. It was hard to truly understand how long forever was and how long Finley would be there but he'd already noticed tiny signs of aging in David while his own face in the mirror stayed exactly the same, frozen in time at the moment that he'd become a demon and his familiar body had become nothing more than a suit of flesh he wore.

His body knew David's body in a way that he'd never known anyone else's. He'd known David's body more times than he'd ever known anyone else's and in the moment, while he was fucking David, that all seemed so simple. Nothing complicated about doing this with no one else at all. Finley knew the way to move to drag more of those sounds out of David, the right angle to tilt their hips to force another dribble of pre-come from David's cock. His breath was harsh in the small room and his grip let up enough to close a hand around David's cock and stroke. There was time enough to drag it out later, he needed David to come for him and him alone now.

With every new tilt of his hips where Finley could hit exactly the right angle, David was a little more lost. He was very swiftly dissolving into a pile of loose limbs, moans drawn out with every thrust of Finley’s cock into his body, and the pre-come that was leaking steadily between the other man’s fingers. There was always a moment right after Finley wrapped a hand around his dick in the middle of fucking him, one moment where David was almost overwhelmed with sensory overload, his body briefly confused by which to focus on - the dick in his ass or his own. Right now was no different than any other time.

After a moment of physical confusion where David’s body was caught between pushing back on Finley’s cock and thrusting forward into Finley’s hand, what followed was a small, vulnerable whimper as David’s whole frame shuddered around Finley, ultimately giving into the rhythm of the demon’s hand. He could have come the other way, had before, but even with as stimulated as he was, it wouldn’t have happened as fast. It would have taken him longer to get to the point of becoming a shaking, pleading mess before coming all over himself and the floor in front of him while Finley continued to drive into him, filling him up and grinding into him in a way that left David feeling inexplicably empty once they were finished.

Now with Finley’s hand around him, stroking David’s cock with every thrust of his, David could feel himself hurtling towards that point at top speed, so fast it nearly made him dizzy. Not quite, but almost there, it was driving him crazy how much he wanted to come and even crazier that despite how physically close they were, he still couldn’t feel every inch of Finley’s warm body against his. Irrationally, that no matter how deeply Finley took him, he could never quite get far enough inside David for David to be satisfied with it. Maybe in a way he was trying to make up for it too, for mistaking anyone’s touch for Finley’s, no matter how convincing the imposter had been. “You’re too far away,” David mumbled nonsensically, shuddering and leaning into every stroke as he moaned and gasped. “Ngh, fuck, Finley. I’m gonna come.”

Glib thoughts flickered through Finley's mind without ever coming to rest on his tongue, quips about how he could crawl right on up around David's soul if he really wanted him to, or pointing out that David coming was the point. He'd have made them once. He knew he'd have made them once, back when they were first starting this thing, but it didn't occur to him to actually say them anymore. They were thought and discarded like so much trash because what was more important was the clench of David's ass around his cock and the way David sounded like he was going entirely out of his own mine and Finley was the one doing it to him. Even if he'd tried to make some kind of playful comment that would put him back firmly in control he couldn't have gotten it out through the haze that the comments drifted through, like tiny fish in an algae ridden pond.

"Yes," he choked out instead. It sounded like there were hands wrapped as tightly around his throat as David's ass was wrapped around his cock. "Yes, do it..." He wanted, needed to feel David come for him, to have David coat his hand with warm, wet spunk because of Finley's cock and Finley's hand. The moment was dirty and wrong and utterly perfect, and Finley could have lost it forever.

That choked him in an entirely different way and he squeezed his eyes tightly shut as they somehow managed to burn even as he rutted into the younger man's body. David was his, and he was taking him. Claiming him. The two of them were the entire world and Finley forgot even that they were somewhere semi-public, something that had always been a thrill before turned into something that didn't matter because the need was more powerful than anything else could ever possibly be.

Finley stroked David's cock exactly the way he knew the younger man liked it and the groan that resonated through his chest was almost a 'please'.

That was all the warning Finley had, not that David had actually expected him to move his hand before David came all over him. They’d never been shy about that stuff before. Two seconds later, he came so hard that David thought for a moment that he might actually pass out. Stars sprang in the corners of his vision even when he shut his eyes tight a second later, giving himself over completely to the moment while he came hard all over Finley’s fingers and painting the floor in front of them with his cum.

David usually came hard with Finley, but this already felt like something different. He couldn’t say how, because he wasn’t thinking about anything at the moment. Every thought that was in his head had flown out the second he felt that familiar tingling sensation building up inside him finally erupt, cock jumping in Finley’s hand as he came while the rest of him curled back towards the other man, tightening himself around Finley as his body shuddered forcefully with the impact of the mind blowing orgasm he’d just had

Everything about what they’d just done was so filthy and illicit and David couldn’t get enough of it, even as he felt himself being physically drained all over the floor at his feet, he still felt like he was buzzing a little from the coupling, like he hadn’t come down. David honestly hoped he never would, this was the most he’d been outside of his own head since he’d been in that basement, and he’d give anything to keep feeling this way. He’d probably sell his soul again if he could. David sagged forward more heavily against the table he’d been bracing himself on, breathing hard but he still kept his hips perfectly positioned for Finley, shivering as he enjoyed the warm, wet slide of Finley fucking into him in the afterglow.

Finley was close, close, painfully close and he kept fucking into David hard and brutal, his own breath nearly deafening him in the small room. "David, David..." He didn't even know what he was saying; every bit of blood in his body was centered in his cock, buried in David's tight, hot ass. Finley was lightheaded and if he'd been more capable of coherent speech he might have been in danger of saying things that he wouldn't be able to take back once it was all over, things about never letting go again and how he'd felt during that horrible day when they hadn't been able to find David anywhere even with all their skills. The fact that he couldn't put two words together, or remember any words that weren't David's name, was all that saved him from it.

It wasn't long before Finley was following David over the edge, coming inside him with a harsh cry before he slumped against him, lips pressed to the back of David's neck. There still wasn't any sound except the two of them breathing. It was comforting, soothing even. David was there and his back was solid against Finley's chest and he was breathing. Finley let an arm drift to tuck around David's waist and hold him close. The position was undignified and awkward and he shouldn't have been getting comfortable there.

He couldn't even begin to imagine moving yet. It was like he was made out of jello that hadn't set properly and he might ooze all over the floor if it wasn't for David being there for him to hold onto.

The sound of the door creaking open didn't really register at first; the sound of another man's voice did. "Hey, you got a spare pick laying around somewhere or—oh fuck, sorry!"

Erik covered his eyes and turned around but he couldn't unsee what he'd already seen and wow he hadn't needed to know that David bottomed. Not that there was anything wrong with it. Not that Erik had a problem with two men having lots of dirty sex. There were just things that he didn't want to know about the guy that he'd always seen as the little brother he'd never had and what he liked in bed was definitely one of them. Sure, he'd mostly seen Finley (and he was secure enough to admit that David had landed a seriously hot one there), but that didn't make up for the fact that he knew who was on the bottom of that little pile.

"Sorry, Jesus..." It was like Erik had forgotten how to use a door even though he was standing there right beside an open one.

Everything happened so fast that David had a hard time reacting to it all at once. His mind was still mush from coming his brains out and his legs felt like jelly, the only thing keeping him upright was the vanity table he wa still braced against and the sold weight of Finley collapsed on top of him to keep him centered. For one split second the entire world had been reduced to the sounds of them breathing together, the feeling of Finley’s cock still pulsating inside him with a wave of heat that went right down to his toes, that satisfying feeling of being so physically spent that all of your limbs felt useless.

David didn’t even have to time to properly bask in the afterglow of the hot and dirty sex he and Finley just had, because that was when they were interrupted. No more laying together collapsed in an exhausted heap, the sweat from both of their bodies mingling as their breathing slowed down enough that it sounded like they were coming from one set of lungs. There was a time when David might not have thought to take a minute to enjoy this part, but he’d almost died a few weeks ago. Some things had changed since then.

It had taken David a full two seconds to fully realize what was happening and by the time he did, Erik had already seen way more than he’d bargained for, and David had gone from almost feeling completely relaxed for the first time in weeks to a full blown panic. Detaching himself from Finley wasn’t the easiest thing to do considering David’s current position, but he shot up at the same time as he also tried to bend forward to grab for his pants and attempt to pull them up, speaking in a strangled voice. “Do you mind?!”

Not that Finley hadn't experienced worse pain than the sudden separation from David, but he winced and moved instinctively to cover his cock with his hands. "For fuck's sake!" Was David trying to rip it off like that? Finley didn't bother reaching for his own clothes, just glared over his shoulder at the intruder who ought to have known better than to walk into David's dressing room unannounced.

"Sorry!" Erik sounded almost panicked. "I figured you'd lock the door if you were..." His other hand flung out to the side and gestured wildly. Seriously, it couldn't be unseen and Erik regretted everything about his choice to walk into David's dressing room without knocking. "I'm just... gonna..."

At last, the horror that had frozen Erik in place dissolved enough that he could make a break for it and slam the door behind him.

Finley groaned and slumped behind David. "Well. That's the first time someone's actually walked in before we'd gotten all our clothes back on." It might even be funny in a couple of days.

David laughed darkly. It wasn’t his usual laugh, and it was definitely a really inappropriate time to be laughing at all, probably. After all the times they’d done this in places where they were just asking to get caught by someone, all the times they’d avoided so much as touching each other in public because with the spotlight David was constantly under, too many people would start asking questions. After all of that, it all came down to them being too hot for each other to bother checking that the damn door was locked?

He laughed, but not because he actually found anything about this funny. It was more like a reflex. His heart just wasn’t in it. For maybe the first time in weeks, David had actually started to feel okay again. When it was just him and Finley and no one else, he didn’t have to act like he hadn’t just been through a trauma, but he didn’t have to dwell on it either. He’d even started to feel almost safe in their own little world that they’d created, but then, Erik just had to open that door and let the rest of the world back in.

“Guess it was bound to happen sooner or later.” Feeling on edge again, David let himself feel the familiar weight of Finley still behind him for a few seconds longer before he finally resigned himself to finishing the process of pulling up and fastening his pants, Now that they’d actually been caught, they should probably get dressed before anyone else was stupid enough to walk in here. “Sorry about the uh…” He was going to finish that sentence with something along the lines of ‘hasty detachment’, but when he turned around to face Finley, still buttong his jeans, David blinked. “Were you… not wearing a condom?”

Finley wasn't exactly pleased by the interruption but it hadn't put him in as much of a mood as it seem to have David. Before, Finley might have commented on it, made some sort of fuss about whether David was ashamed to have been caught with him just to get under David's skin and have him scrambling to soothe him.

Those sort of games weren't anything Finley had played since he got David back safe and sound. It was an almost physical strain, not saying anything, but things were off balance in a way that made it abundantly clear how comfortable they'd been before. Finley liked being pandered to and having his ego stroked; David seemed to be entertained enough to keep doing it. That, or the sex really was that good… likely the second. Finley had always gotten far more compliments on his body than on his personality.

It hadn't seemed right, somehow, to indulge in his favorite hobby of drama when David wasn't at his best, as if Finley being high maintenance might have been a single straw too many on the camel's back. It left him wound tightly inside, prone to snap and bitch at anyone who wasn't David. The only time it unwound at all was when they were fucking.

Finley looked down at himself, his bare cock still hanging out over his trunks. “Apparently not.” It was a little snarkier than he intended, a little less humorous and a little more mocking. It occurred to him now that the condom must have been that miniscule detail that was missing when he'd been too hungry for David to think, earlier. Maybe he should have been worried about it but Finley was strangely calm about that, in particular. David was too honest not to have told him if he hadn't been careful, after all. There was a sick feeling that wound him up even tighter at the thought that David would probably tell anyone else he'd been sleeping with that he had gone bare with Finley. Finley wanted to rip their intestines out.

Some part of David had already known the answer, but he’d asked anyway. Thinking back on it, it all made sense, why it’d felt a million times better than it usually did, why he’d come so much faster. At the time he either hadn’t thought about it or he just hadn’t cared. In the moment it’d been exactly what he’d needed, everything about their time together before Erik had come barging in to ruin the moment had been enough to take David completely outside of his own head for the first time since he’d come out of that basement. All of the bad memories, the nightmares, all gone as Finley pushed him over the edge.

Now it was all flooding back to him at once, completely overwhelming David as he tried desperately to keep a grip on the here and now. He wasn’t okay. As much as he’d been pretending he was fine afterward, he was pretty far from it. Of the two of them, it was David who was usually the relaxed, easy going one, but lately, it had also been David always carrying a short fuse, ready to snap at a moment’s notice. The only thing that ever stopped him from losing it was being around Finley, but that had been ruined with Erik’s untimely entrance when David hadn’t been mentally prepared for the interruption.

Maybe under different circumstances it wouldn’t have been as big of a deal. If David hadn’t already been so wound up, maybe he could have taken a second to breathe, but in that particular moment, it was like all of the blood rushed to David’s head at once as he felt himself finally spinning out of control after weeks of keeping it all in, Finley’s flippant response finally making him snap. “Are you serious?” He spoke with an edge, tone laced with panic that didn’t necessarily belong in the present situation, but David was too mixed up to think straight. “You don’t think that should have maybe been a discussion first?”

"I don't recall you trying to stop and talk before you shoved your ass at me." The acid in Finley's tone matched the panic in David's—he really didn't see why David was overreacting to a simple mistake. "I couldn't get it in you fast enough to suit you as it was."

Technically true, if a little cruder than he would have been with David otherwise... anymore, at least. Finley knew he ought to back away and wait until their heads were cooler. It would be the responsible thing to do. Not that they'd ever been all that great at being responsible with each other before. That was beside the point though. Finley knew he should bite his tongue but suddenly it was completely beyond his capabilities to do so. Having David missing hadn't exactly been easy on him, either, and it wasn't like he'd rated the touching, heartwarming reunion that Mother Winchester had gotten with him to hug it all better.

This was what Finley got and damned if David was going to ruin it with throwing a fit about something that wasn't a big deal. "Really, I'm shocked this is the first time."

Clearly David would have to admit that Finley was right about that. They'd been in some situations before where a condom was the last thing on their minds and they'd still managed it. They'd survive one fucking time without; they'd laugh it off any second now.

The unforgiving bite of Finley’s words and the ice in his tone was more than enough to make David inwardly bristle, mind reeling for at least the third time since Erik had barged in and completely ruined what little peace he’d managed to get that day. Some part of him knew that he was only picking a fight because he could, because it was easier than admitting the truth, that he wasn’t doing so hot. It was even easier with Finley, because all they’d done for months after first meeting was push and pull at each other (mostly Finley, but David had still done his fair share of pulling) until one or both of them finally snapped.

Except neither of them had ever snapped like this, though. Even that public fight they’d had in the middle of a party felt different from this, because everything that came out of Finley’s mouth felt like it was full of venom, poised to strike at where it would hurt David the most, and David was too out of control to filter the things coming out of his own mouth, despite how careful he usually was with him. As it was, David flinched hard, unable in his current state to do something as evolved as back down from this.

“Easy for you to say!” The words were spilling out of David’s mouth faster than he could actually think, so the possibility of stopping himself before he went too far was slim to none, his entire posture suddenly shifting to something more withdrawn and rigid while facing off with Finley like he actually was looking for a fight. The disorientation he was feeling from the verbal whiplash only made him more hysterical. “Maybe to you it’s no big deal but it might be to someone who hasn’t already slept with a million people!”

Finley's gut went cold and he thought for a moment that he couldn't have heard David correctly. David could be thoughtless but he'd never been cruel. Oh, Finley had known that he had it in him. He just... hadn't thought it would ever be directed at him. They were a team, him and David. They stuck together. Finley bothered with things for David that he wouldn't have bothered with for anyone else; they'd been together—sleeping together, that was all, obviously—for two and a half years. Not that Finley had been counting. It was just unusual for someone to stay interesting for that long. It didn't make David special or—

Honestly, David had put up with Finley longer than anyone but his family, who was stuck with him, had ever bothered.

That was the only reason it settled so sickly sour in his stomach the same way it had when his brother had implied that Finley was some sort of toxic lay who poisoned everyone and everything he happened to touch. Contaminated. Dirty. Finley was pale, his face set into stern lines while he stared David down and told him, "I'll give you one chance to reconsider what you said."

It was fair. It was more than fair. It was more than Finley would have given anyone else and just because David had been through hell it didn't give him the fucking right to judge Finley like that. He'd never complained about the benefits he'd gotten from Finley's experience before... not except for that prearranged fight in the smoothie place, the one that had ended with David calling him cheap and Finley dumping smoothie on him. If Finley'd happened to have a smoothie in his hand then he would have done the exact same thing.

David didn't deserve to be placated with anything about how Finley had never gone bare with anyone before. He most certainly didn't deserve to hear that Finley hadn't slept with anyone but him for over two years. That awful queasy quaking in Finley's gut kept him from saying anything else, anyway.

Even with as worked up as he was, as soon as the words were out of David’s mouth, he knew he’d fucked up. Part of him didn’t even know why he’d said it, maybe he and Finley had never been particularly nice to each other if they could help it, but David had never been outright mean to him. What he’d said wasn’t even how he really felt about Finley, so he didn’t know why he’d said it, but from the look on Finley’s face it was already too late to take it back, even if he did. A small, very vulnerable part of David suddenly desperately wished they could go back to before Erik had interrupted them, when it was just the two of them in the room with only the sounds of their breathing and Finley’s arm wrapped around his waist that had David’s attention. Where it seemed like nothing else could touch him while they were like this.

Something told David that he wouldn’t be getting that, maybe not ever again, a thought that made him feel briefly sick but was quickly overpowered by his already overwhelming fight or flight instinct. When push came to shove, David was always going to choose fight, and he wasn’t in the sort of state of mind where he had the kind of reasoning skills it took to see whether or not it was something worth fighting. He was just going to fight, against all of his better judgement, the way Finley was staring him down and the harshness of his words making him feel even more cagey and on edge, his defenses already up.

He would have taken a step back if he could have, but his back was still pressed to the edge of the vanity table, and since they’d first met David had never felt actually cornered by Finley, no matter how close they got. Usually it was never close enough, but right now, David felt like he was about to crawl out of his own skin. “Or what?” Instead of backing down like he should have, David mentally pushed back against Finley’s hard stare because it was the only thing he could do. “Are you seriously going to deny it?”

The real bitch of the situation was that Finley couldn't deny it—oh, a million was an exaggeration, but it wasn't as if Finley had exactly bothered keeping count. He'd known at one point of course, been able to list just by virtue of remembering the where and the when, but after a while the faces started to blur together until he got to David.

Finley had learned that he really could feel this awful and not be dying, when it came to David. He'd survived before; the gutted, hollow feeling that was seeping in was different than any of the other horrible ways he'd felt when David was involved but history showed that he would survive this too. It still felt a little like he might actually vomit, but the wild clawing inside his chest when he'd seen David flirting with another man was replaced by absolute numbness. It should have been a relief, not feeling it; this time instead of feeling like he was dying, Finley wondered if maybe he was already dead and he just hadn't realized it.

It barely felt like it was him talking when he finally found his voice again. "You never seemed to care that I was a slut before when you were spreading and begging for my cock."

Part of him wanted David to grovel—to beg for his forgiveness for saying it. He'd make David make it up to him... no one in the history of groveling would have worked as hard as Finley would make David work to earn forgiveness for saying something that honestly wasn't even a lie. The loudest part of him though, that part wanted to hurt David worse than David had hurt him. It was the only way to get the upper hand back, wasn't it? Maybe David had the power to make Finley feel like this but Finley knew how to stab him where it hurt too. He knew how to hit so hard that David would never say anything cruel again for fear of how deeply Finley would dig in the knife. David had forgotten, Finley thought (numbly, everything was numb), who he was dealing with.

"Wouldn't your mother be so ashamed? Oh, wait..." Finley left only enough room for the pause to be dramatic. "Good thing she's dead, so you never have to tell her."

He knew it was a mistake as soon as the words left his mouth; he didn't try to take them back or apologize. Let David suffer. Finley could be ten times as cruel as he ever could.

David honestly felt like he’d gotten the wind knocked out of him, as sudden and painful as Finley’s words had hit him square in the chest. He sucked in a sharp breath, eyes wide with shock in place of the anger he probably should have felt, too surprised by what Finley had said to explode with rage like he would have with anybody else who said a thing against his mother. Partially because David would never have thought that of all people Finley would say something like that. It just didn’t make sense to him.

Yeah, they’d both already said some things they shouldn’t. David knew he was in the wrong and should apologize, even if it was true that Finley had slept with more people than him. He hadn’t meant to imply anything the way it’d actually come out, and he knew it wasn’t right to take it out on Finley just because David was having a bad week(s), he didn’t deserve that. Finley had been one of the people who’d saved him, he wasn’t the enemy. He was… honestly, David had no idea what Finley was to him. The line had been blurred between them for so long that somewhere along the way he’d just stopped questioning what they were to each other. At one point he thought he knew, but ever since that huge fight at that party that’d ended with hooking up in a closet, things had felt different. But now he only felt sick to his stomach when he tried to make sense of how he felt about him in the wake of what Finley had just said.

Almost as if Finley had taken the fight out of him all at once, the registered shock on his face melted away to something a lot more wounded than any of the anger he’d felt two seconds ago. David didn’t want to fight with Finley anymore. In fact, he didn’t want to be in the same room with Finley anymore. That was a first, but David followed that instinct. It was the only thing that was going to save him from the harsh sting of Finley’s words, and from saying anything else that would only make this worse. After the brief, stoney silence that followed, David finally pulled his shirt down so it actually covered his entire torso, avoiding eye contact as he brushed past Finley to head for the door. For the first time since they’d met, David walked away from Finley, and he didn’t look back once before the door shut firmly behind him.

Funny. Finley had gotten the last word. He'd won. Technically? Finley had regained the upper hand in this confrontation. He should have been pleased by it—it was what he'd wanted, wasn't it?

It didn't feel like he'd won, or like he had the upper hand, at all. If anything it felt like he'd lost... something. Something far more important than a fight, or winning it, could ever have been. Finley wasn't sure exactly how that felt except that it wasn't good.

Maybe David hadn't gotten the last word, but Finley was the one standing alone in the middle of a dressing room with his pants around his knees and that same numb emptiness growing inside him. David hadn't said anything when he'd walked away. He hadn't blustered or tried to get in one last shot. He hadn't said anything about talking later or seeing Finley some other time.

David would be back, Finley told himself. He'd realize that they were both being ridiculous and he'd come back and they'd get over all of this and go back to...

To what? Finley wasn't even certain what was left now that what they'd said hadn't torn to shreds. David would get over it. Finley would get over it. They'd both get over it and be fine and never talk about this argument again.

David would be back.

Finley didn't even bother pulling his pants up, or getting anything about himself put back together at all, before he blinked from there to the safety of his apartment living room.