jason collins ☤ luke castellan (evilmalemodel) wrote in thereincarnates, @ 2012-09-29 17:00:00 |
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Entry tags: | jason collins, theresa philips |
Who: Jason Collins and Tess Philips
What: Oaths and reconciliations.
Where: Central Park, NY – The Doors of Orpheus
When: Saturday evening, September 29th, 2012
Warnings: All the usual demigod warnings? Plus a little extra.
Jason stared at the pile of boulders, but the boulders didn't stare back. They just sat there, unassuming and foreboding all at once, and Jason chewed on his lip until he couldn't take it anymore, turning away and shaking his head. Of all the harebrained ideas he had, it was hard to believe that this was the best one – and maybe it wasn't, but it was the only one that took initiative. The only one that didn't mean waiting around for something terrible to happen so he could save the day, or doing something reckless and stupid and somehow making it out on the other side in one piece and with a sheepishly triumphant grin. Even if he succeeded, neither of those options proved what he wanted to prove. They'd just make him an action figure, a glory hound, and the thought left a bitter taste in his mouth. He'd been more than that, before his worst nightmare came true and he ran scared for all the wrong reasons. He had to be more again, for himself and for Tess, and this was the only way to do it. Not the best way. The only way.
He started pacing on an already flattened patch of grass (he'd been pacing on and off for about twenty minutes now), and an accidental glance back at the boulders made him shudder involuntarily. There was nothing in the world Luke dreaded more than opening those gates and going back into the Underworld, nothing he feared quite as much, but if it meant getting Thalia back, and Tess for Jason, then he wouldn't hesitate. Neither of them would, not for a second. But it was hard to forget the first time he'd been through these gates, and Jason gritted his teeth at the memory that wasn't his. How desolate Luke had been, how terrified, how alone. Thalia had nearly killed him, Annabeth rejected him, and Kronos made it abundantly clear: cross the River Styx, or suffer more than you can possibly imagine. If Luke had been a better man, he would've refused, but Luke was broken. He clung to his anger because it was all he had left, and he crossed this threshold to finish the war he'd started. His decision. No one else's.
But it's different this time, Jason thought, almost desperately. Sometimes it scared him how much he could sympathize with Luke, how he understood exactly why the wayward demigod had made each of those damning decisions, and that, if nothing else, made it all the more important that he went back to the river tonight – for the right reasons this time.
And as if on cue, that was when his reason arrived. Tess. He stopped pacing and his stomach jolted at the sight of her, stunning even from a distance. He swallowed and waited to speak until she was closer, though he wasn't sure he would've been able to at first anyway. Everything he'd done wrong since Jett Doyle had used him to steal a wand from the Agency got stuck in Jason's throat; the sight of her was just a reminder. Keeping his distance, making decisions for her instead of with her, believing she was safer without him, those still hung over them like a cloud whenever they spent time with each other. They were talking now, at least, but it wasn't the same. She still didn't trust him, and that was worse than anything Doyle had done to him. Agonizingly worse.
He'd asked her here during a passing moment today at camp, when they crossed paths and then went their separate ways. He hadn't really told her why, just asked her to meet him here before dusk, giving her a vague but determined, I know how to fix this. Jason was so relieved to see her that his knees nearly gave out, but instead he cleared his throat and offered her a small, shaky smile, breaking the tension somewhat.
"Tess. I wasn't, uh." He cleared his throat once more and tried again. "Thank you. For coming, I mean." He glanced back at the conspicuous boulders, his lips twitching into an echo of the grins he used to share with her, unknowingly mischievous in spite of everything as he gestured a little awkwardly at the Doors of Orpheus. "I guess you know what those are, so I apologize in advance. I'm gonna have to sing to open them. Didn't think to bring a satyr. My, uh. My bad."