WHO: Brandon Ferris WHEN: Early morning, May 19, 2011 WHERE: A field near his school WHAT: Brandon finally gets the balls to morph hawk, and wishes he could tell more people. WARNINGS: Nothing. It's Brandon.
It shouldn't have been so hard. It wasn't as though Brandon had never morphed before. On the contrary, it felt like his life had turned into a non-stop barrage of practicing morphing with Tad, to the point that he went back to their apartment exhausted. He had missed so much class this semester that it was clear he wouldn't be graduating as intended, but he could deal with that. With as much as was thrown on his plate, worrying about using his degree to find a career at this time would be too much for him to handle. A shame, really. He could remember when he was the most responsible Ferris, with high goals and career aspirations. It was amazing what a little knowledge could do.
Morphing hawk was different. It hadn't been something he'd been able to practice with Tad. The form was incredibly personal for Tobias, and a source of fear for Brandon. It was stupid to be afraid of that form in particular; he had no greater danger of being stuck as a hawk than he did a wolf, or tiger. But the fear was there nonetheless, along with the memories of Tobias's time living as the bird. It was weird having memories that weren't his own, to know what it was like to have to kill animals with his claws to survive. To know how ashamed and depressed Tobias had been when he'd been forced to eat road kill so he wouldn't die.
The field was damp with morning dew as the sun had barely risen high enough to cast its rays over the tall trees and onto the field where Brandon stood. It was well-hidden, a place nobody would venture normally. It was easy to get lost going from the main road to this small patch of clearing in the middle of the forest, but that was why Brandon had chosen it. If he got lost, it would be easy to turn into the dog he'd acquired and sniff his way back. Other people, however, were less likely to come in and discover the boy who wasn't entirely a boy as he changed from human to hawk.
The change was creepy, but morphing always was. He could hear his bones crunching together, see the skin on his arms developing feather patterns before the feathers started sprouting. It was different every time, the way he morphed. Grotesque. It lacked all of the finesse and grace that only Cassie seemed to display--if Tobias's memories served him well. He had yet to meet a reincarnate of his old friend with the barn. All of the changes happened this time before he could start shrinking, and as soon as the shrinking started he froze. His heart was pounding. He was so close, just a little more concentration and he would do it, but the fear was there and he just wanted to hide.
He pushed past it. Every other time he had tried he hadn't been able to, but he had to do it this time. If he couldn't get past his fear of a morph, he would never be able to face the Yeerks. And what if Visser Three showed up? He forced his mind to clear, and a few minutes later found himself shrinking completely to hawk. It was like something in his brain clicked. Suddenly he could see and hear so much better than he could before, the smallest blade of grass trembling, the scampering of field mice. He could hear it all.
He took flight, using a thermal to give him altitude so that he wouldn't have to flap too hard. It was a rush, an intense feeling of freedom to be a bird. Suddenly he couldn't understand why he was so afraid before; in the back of his mind, Tobias felt almost peaceful. It was only fifteen minutes of flying before he forced himself down to the ground to morph back. He couldn't take the chance he would get stuck, and he hadn't perfected the internal timing the way Ax had.
"Wow," He muttered to himself as he pulled his clothes back on over his morphing outfit. His cell phone was found quickly.
The first person called was Leon. The message was simple: "I did it." He couldn't chance saying more. If somebody heard the message and knew he'd morphed, it would be trouble for all of them. The second was Ty. This one was harder. He couldn't tell his brother about his morphing, but the elation he felt from the experience gave him the courage to let him know he wouldn't be graduating. Not until next year.