Lizzie Bennet has a vlog (quiteprolific) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2013-03-01 10:40:00 |
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She didn’t even make it to Central Park. Lizzie had her route planned by taking public transportation, and though it was cramped and suffocating and she just wanted to get to the damn Park already, she disembarked at the second stop. Quickly googling directions on her smartphone, she began to walk back to Potts Tower hurriedly, keeping her head down as she did. For the most part, Lizzie was never noticed by the many hurried New Yorkers as a refugee; she was after all, fairly inconspicuous. Her steps were made with purpose; and she looked much more comfortable than she felt. Lizzie felt like the walk should have taken much longer than it had but she could feel the slight sheen of sweat on her forehead and knew that she had to have been almost running for her temporary, because that’s all this place was, temporary, home. The lobby bore no signs of the horribly awkward encounter that took place not even an hour before, but Lizzie stalled at the elevator before choosing to take the steps instead. She was deservedly out of breath by the time she cleared the seventh floor landing, and she talked to herself a bit, in an attempt to boost her confidence. God, Lydia was going to make fun of her, but she couldn’t really be bothered about that now. She needed someone to talk to, and Lydia was the first person who came to mind. She knocked on the door in rapid succession, her fists echoing on the sturdy door as she called out, “Lydia? Are you there?” As much as Lydia put on about how happy she was in New York City the truth of the matter was that it was all a big show to make sure her sisters thought she was okay after everything that had happened. She hadn’t gone out of the tower for more than a single shopping trip to make sure she had clothes to wear. It was very unlike her. Old Lydia would have been at a different bar every single night trying to pick up on guys or getting drunk and dancing on top of tables. New Lydia was spending the majority of her time online. She called it internet espionage, but really she was just being nosy. Lydia prided herself in always being ‘in the know’ and there was a lot for her to get caught up on. She justified herself that way. She was just spying on everyone, not avoiding them. Everything was completely perfect as far as Lydia was concerned. The little redhead was perched in front of her computer when she heard the knock at the door followed by Lizzie’s voice. She raised her eyebrows and made a Lydia-esque face. “Come in, nerd! The door’s not locked.” Whatever it was that Lizzie wanted she had a feeling it was urgent. Something in her sister’s voice told Lydia that so she turned her computer monitor off and hopped off of her computer chair to go make an attempt at tea. Too bad Jane wasn’t there to do make it for them. Lizzie rolled her eyes at what she knew was a term of endearment and opened the door just enough for her to slide through and closing it behind her. Every nerve in her body felt alight with anxiety and she shucked off her jacket quickly and placed it with her scarf on the edge of the couch. "Hey, Lydia." She was focused enough to give her little sister a squeeze and a kiss on top of her head before letting her go. She wasn't really fooling anyone. Lydia had become next to reclusive and while Lizzie respected that it was going to take time for her to really get to a happy medium between the new and old, it still made her anxious. But what was done was done; and Wickham hurt her and there was no way to immediately rebound from that sort of betrayal. It was more than love, there was an insurmountable measure of trust Lydia had put in him. And he broke it. The thought still filled her with rage. Walking into the kitchen, Lizzie sat in one of the chairs, her fingers twisting in her lap. She looked unhinged, she knew. "I saw Darcy." Lydia took note of the squeeze that Lizzie gave her. It was a strange sensation being hugged like that. Sure, Jane gave Lydia tons of hugs, but Lizzie and Lydia’s relationship was very different. Lydia was always the one that hugged Lizzie, not the other way around. The first time Lizzie had hugged Lydia was when Lydia was so incredibly broken she couldn’t even hold her own body up. This was the second time Lydia could remember ever being hugged by Lizzie. It meant the world to her, but she didn’t say it and just hugged her sister back instead, a little shiver going up her spine when Lizzie planted a kiss on her head. There was another first. Lydia filled the kettle with water and then turned the stove on. It would be awhile before the water was boiling, so Lydia leaned against the counter and gave her attention to her sister. “You mean you saw him saw him? Like in person?” she asked, her eyes sparkling mischievously. Now that Lizzie and Darcy had run into each other then Lydia took that as a sign that the Great Avoidance of 2013 was over and she could start parent trapping them immediately. “Oh-Em-Gee! What did he say? What did you say? Please don’t tell me you insulted him.” Lizzie did that sometimes. Lizzie could see the slightly crazed look in Lydia's eyes and she knew she should fear it. Between Lydia and Gigi, Lizzie and Darcy didn't stand a chance. They'd be locked into awkward situations until something gave. Right at that moment, though? Lizzie was already scared enough by her feelings. She didn't have enough room to process more of it. "As in I literally ran into him while I was on my way out of the building." She ran a hand through her hair, watching the kettle on the stove for a moment, her face growing hot. "He asked how I was; how you and Jane were. And we talked about holes in the sidewalk." Lydia just stared at her sister with a blank look on her face for a moment while she processed what she was hearing. God! What a nerd! Who spoke to the guy they were in love with about holes in the sidewalk? Lydia had known that she had her work cut out for her after speaking to Darcy on the network after he arrived, but she was just beginning to realize how hard this was going to be. It might take awhile before Lizzie and Darcy were sharing that ice cream cone because it was obvious Lizzie wasn’t willing to become a pirate. “That’s it? You talked about holes in the sidewalk?” Lydia asked dejectedly, but it was a rhetorical question. She already knew the answer. “I think I’m going to have to make my ‘Reasons Why Lizzie Bennet is Perpetually Single’ list a second page,” she said jokingly, but when she saw the look on Lizzie’s face she knew it wasn’t the time for her jokes. “Okay, but you talked! That’s a good thing! He didn’t run in the opposite direction or anything, did he? See? Progress!” "I-" Lizzie covered her burning face with her hands; inexplicable tears pricking the back of her eyes. She felt stupid for even freaking out as she had, like the feelings she had weren't as genuine as she believed. "I told him that I had forgotten that good people existed. And then I told him whoever that the reason I had faith in people was because of who took down the website." Her heart hurt, as did her head and Lizzie stared past Lydia's head at the clock on the wall, lost in thought. "I can't be sure but I think he knows that he will do it since he hasn't already." The amount of progress she made was minimal in the Darcy department. She couldn't help but wonder if it would ever change. "He..." The look he gave her haunted her thoughts. This was the worst. "I thought he was going to kiss me." When Lyda saw Lizzie cover her face like that she knew that she had to turn off the joke-Lydia. Lizzie really needed her right then so Lydia crossed the kitchen to put her arms around her sister. Lydia was always the more touchy-feely sister in the family so it was just natural for her to give comfort through touch. “But that’s good thing, isn’t it?” Lydia asked, giving Lizzie’s shoulders a little squeeze. “I don’t understand. Why are you on the verge of tears? All of this sounds like good news to me! You should be happy.” Lizzie usually resisted hugs from Lydia. Most times they were too tight, too insistent and too out-of-nowhere for her to properly know how to respond, but this time, Lizzie just leaned into her younger sister’s arms; letting the tears leak from her eyes slowly. She couldn’t pinpoint exactly why she was upset. It could have been the homesickness, or the being worried sick about Lydia and how this place was affecting her. Mostly, though, she knew she was greatly upset by the fact that Darcy hadn’t seemed to want her to stay. “Because I don’t think he wanted to. I think we both just got caught up in a moment and then it was over, and I left.” Lizzie sighed before nodding towards the whistling kettle. “I told him my apartment number, in case he wanted to see me. I don’t know if he’ll follow through with it, though.” Lydia had a hard time understanding her sisters on the best of days. Jane was so composed all the time and she never wanted to talk about anything negative going on in her life. She ignored her problems. Lizzie? Well, she created problems out of nowhere and completely overreacted to everything. She was judgey and stubborn. There was a reason why Lizzie and Lydia didn’t get along all that great. They were a lot alike, but that still didn’t mean Lydia always understood her sister. It was quite the opposite actually. Lydia had a hard time getting on Lizzie’s level and this was another one of those moments. Lydia frowned and released her hold on her sister reluctantly so she could go and turn off the stove. She got down two mugs and filled them with the water and then stuck a teabag in each to let them soak. “Well,” Lydia said carefully. She didn’t want to upset her sister, but she also just didn’t understand why Lizzie was reacting the way she was. “I wasn’t there so I don’t know, but I don’t think Darcy is really the type to do anything he doesn’t want to do. He acts like he doesn’t want to do fun things like go to Carson’s, but no-one can be that lame.” But Lydia didn’t exactly expect that to help so she just put a mug of tea in front of Lizzie and sat down across from her. “Hey,” she said, her voice softer. “I’m really sorry. I wish I knew what to say or do, but I love you, okay? I love you, Lizzie.” “I’m that lame,” Lizzie pointed out with a small smile on her. It was hard, and trying at times, but she was glad she went to Lydia. Jane was a bit too positive on this sort of things. “It’s okay,” she replied, picking up her tea and taking a big sip. “Thank you. For letting me come be crazy. I love you, too, Lyd.” |