Jon Kasiya | Amun (mysteryofset) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2015-06-27 17:29:00 |
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Entry tags: | alistair theirin, jaina solo, jennifer takeda / hazmat (616), laura kinney / x-23 (616), rikki barnes / nomad (616) |
As of Tuesday, I will have been here two years. Two years in which I have lived a strangely typical existence, doing office work, education, and even dabbled in heroics. Though this world is much like home, my life here is entirely different. I wonder if this means, perhaps, this should be my new familiar.
But it is difficult to walk away from one's past. I still have felt more comfortable within the Maggia than I have with the Avengers. But somewhere along the lines, the anger that has always sustained me seems absurd. My Order exists here, but they have done me no wrong that I did not first provoke. Do I lack the heart I once did, or perhaps I have too much of one to kill under orders or seek out one who would issue those orders. Though it remains, that I am somehow changed.
Perhaps that is good, but if I am to be honest, it is a loss of identity. I do not know who I am if not the Hand of Death. Even still. I do not know how to be an American or how to exist in a sphere where delivering death is a matter of morals as opposed to nature. Though I had betrayed that before I had arrived: fearing my own death, plottig to avenge my father's death.
Are there others here handling the same loss of identity? And if I may ask, how do you process this change?
[Filtered to Pepper Potts (AA), Jenny Takeda]
If it is agreeable, I may start taking classes part time in the fall.[Filtered to 11th & 12th Floors (hover)]
It has been some time since I have introduced myself, but I am Jon Kasiya. I am your housing advisor. Should anyone require any assistance. I am in room 1101 generally in early evenings.