fili (durinson) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2015-01-18 21:39:00 |
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Entry tags: | !log, fili, kili |
Who: Fíli & Kíli
When: Sunday, January 18th.
Where: The apartment
What: SONS OF DURIN REUNITED AT LAST
Rating: G
Warnings: Spoilers for Battle of the Five Armies, probably, but just go see that movie already.
Fíli stood on the first floor of this strange tower that he was going to call home. He had only a moment to take in his surroundings before the man he had been following pointed towards a wall where doors magically opened. It was good to keep moving, he wasn’t quite used to the strange stairs as most people he’s come across had at least heard of a dwarf. Here he felt vulnerable, and was eager to get away as soon as possible. “Just step through there,” said the man. His name escaped Fíli, but in his defense there was a lot of information to take in all at once. Once the doors came open again, the man and dwarf set foot into the small compartment. He felt a small surge of panic once the doors closed and he felt the compartment move. “What sort of magic is this?” Fíli gruffed. The man stared ahead and only replied with, “Not magic. Electricity.” Fíli was sure the man was making fun of him somehow, but held his tongue and his frustration. Once the doors opened on the right floor, Fíli was the first to get out. He still wasn’t sure how this compartment worked the way it did, but he was quite sure that he didn’t enjoy the ride. The man stepped forward, but kept the doors from closing. “Your room will be down that way. Just match the number with the one we gave you. You’ll have people from your world waiting for you. If you have any questions, there is a contact that number at the top.” “Thank you for your generosity, sir.” Fíli said with a semi formal bow. “Your kindness is appreciated.” Once the doors closed, Fíli stared down each ends of the hall. He at least knew how to read a sign, and once he figured out the direction he needed to go, walked along. Curious to know what the man had said about people from his world. He didn’t think he would know anyone, no one he knew had gone missing. Fíli grunted once he found his room. There was a small hesitation, who knows what lied beyond this door. What he did expect was a very famíliar voice coming through once he opened the door. If someone had asked him, Kíli would have been able to tell them exactly how long it had been since he’d seen any of his kin. He knew the time almost to the minute. It hadn’t helped matters that Legolas had arrived. Kíli wouldn’t dream of complaining about that, not when it brought Tauriel so much joy, and truthfully, he was glad to see the Elven Prince again. That wasn’t a lie. It was just that it reminded Kíli how alone he was. No -- Kíli frowned. That wasn’t true. He wasn’t alone. He had Tauriel, and that was a wonderful thing. They had Bilbo, too, and new friends. He wasn’t alone. None of them were his brother (or Thorin, or any of his cousins), however, and no matter how much any of them tried, they would never be able to fill the hole in his heart where his brother was meant to be. Kíli was trying to keep his spirits up for his beloved, who worried so much about him, but it wasn’t an easy task. He’d always been a sensitive heart, and he’d always felt everything strongly, whether that was joy or love or rage. Grief he felt, too, down to his bones. The sound at the door finally got his attention, and he picked his head up, looking down the hallway. “I hope you brought me some food, Tauriel, I’m half-starved!” he called out, trying to inject his good humor back into his voice. Surely not. “Kíli?” No. That couldn’t be right. Kíli was back home, however far that was. That voice. Kíli froze for a moment, transfixed. That voice he would know anywhere. That was a voice he’d recognized since long before he could talk (he’d heard stories, of how he smiled at his brother first before anyone else). That voice had haunted his dreams as of late, a desperate cry of run. “Fíli?” Kíli pushed himself up from the couch and scrambled towards the door, his heart thumping wildly in his chest. Could it be? Was this possible? He hadn’t stopped hoping yet, but having his brother here with him was beyond his wildest dreams. There, in the doorway, stood the regal form of his older brother, the same braids, the same battle armor, the same bright blue eyes. A sudden image of the last time he’d seen Fíli flashed through his mind - eyes blank and lifeless, red blooming across his torso - and Kíli tried to force it away. He stood there, as still as stone, staring at his brother in disbelief. “Mahal, can it be true?” he murmured, and then a bright smile appeared on Kíli’s face and he launched himself at his brother, wrapping his arms around him in a crushing hug. “Took you long enough.” Fíli’s eyes held concern, but his smile was genuine. How could it be that Kíli was here as well, and for how long? The idea that he was brought here, same as him didn’t seem so far off but still a million and one questions ran through his mind. Fíli let out a hearty laugh as he felt the crush weight of his brother. The response was meant with the same enthusiasm. “Brother,” he said. “It is good to see you.” A few pats on his brother’s back, he pulled away from the hug to stare at him. He was the same as ever, as he did when they had last seen one another. “Aye, well you know how I like to make an entrance.” With one hand on his brother’s shoulder, he took a quick survey around the room. “This is where I am meant to stay.” He then met his brother's eyes. “Now tell me. This strange land, how long have you been here? I have to admit I find their explanations are hard to believe, but yet this journey is far more than what I could ever imagine.” There was a wanting to keep an open mind, but it was still hard to believe everything he had heard. Kíli hadn't wanted to let go when Fíli pulled back. His heart had ached ever since he'd seen Fíli fall in front of him, and it had been weeks since the battle. Now, Fíli was there, whole and alive, and Kíli didn't want it to end. Reluctantly, he let Fíli back off and he turned to glance back into the room as well, using it as an excuse to hide what he felt. No one knew Kíli like his brother did, and no one would be able to read him like Fíli. He wasn't ready for all of what he had to say. Silently, he wondered if this was how Tauriel felt when she told him of their fates. He'd have to do something nice for her later, now that he understood better. "There are several bedrooms," Kíli began, "a kitchen and a bath, and a living space. It's quite generous." No one he knew would have welcomed strangers in as these people had. "I've been here three weeks. Tauriel and I..." Kíli's voice wavered. He wanted to tell his brother everything, but perhaps it was too soon. The war had been a respite from dealing with his feelings for the elf, and saved him from having to tell his brother. Now, however, how could he keep it from him? And how would Fíli take to it? He had not been subtle, after Smaug had destroyed the town, but now he knew she felt the same way, and now they had a chance to be together like he'd wanted. He took a deep breath. "We arrived here the same day. Master Baggins followed us shortly thereafter, and the Prince of the Woodland Realm, Legolas, earlier this week. It's been quite the adventure." Fíli studied him carefully as he spoke, and a wave of uncertainty washed over him. “Brother?” He said in a calm voice. He had heard Kíli mention Tauriel, Legolas and Master Baggins. He was quite glad that his brother had not had to endure this on his own, but he would come to that topic later. “What is it?” Something inside him lurched. There was something Fíli was keeping from his brother. His joy over seeing his brother was not just for finding out he was here to share this adventure with him. He was certain that he would never see his brother again. Pain twisted his heart as the images of the orcs pushing him towards the cliff. Yes, he knew all too well what fate had in store for him, and as happy as he was to escape that fate, he was not eager to share such news with his brother. Instead he put his focus on his brother who clearly needed him. “I expected to see more cheer in your eyes, brother. What has made you so downcast?” Truly, no one knew him like Fíli. Kíli offered up the best smile he could muster - and it was still wistful, and there was still sadness in his dark eyes - and he closed the door behind his brother. He placed a hand on his brother's shoulder and guided him into the room. If Fíli was in his battle armor, he wasn't far from what Kíli last remembered. "Thorin took you and I, and Dwalin, to Ravenhill," he began, watching Fíli's expression carefully. "Do you remember? Legolas is from some sixty years hence, and Tauriel remembers moments past what I do, as does Bilbo, but not the years the elf prince knows. It's quite complicated, but it's important I know what you remember." So Kíli remembers Ravenhill. He was quite surprised to hear that the elf prince Legolas was so far into future. How very strange. His brother’s words pained him, and he saw the sadness in his brother’s eyes. This was not the happy reunion Fíli had hoped for. The dwarf let out a heavy sigh. There was no way to lie to his brother to spare his feelings, but it pained him to cause his brother such torment. “Kíli,” he began slowly. “I do remember Ravenhill. In battle, we always have to be on our guard, and anticipate what is to come next. There are times where luck is on our side and times where it is not.” His voice was low, but soft. “We walked into a trap, Kíli. We had no way of knowing of what came from the north but we were quickly surrounded.” His hand gripped his brother’s shoulder. “All of our lives, it has been my duty and my privilege to keep you safe. There comes a time where that oath demands a price. I may have escaped my fate, but I know what was in my future when the orcs dragged me to that cliff. When I sent you in that other direction, I kept my oath to you, and to mother. I know, had I stayed, I would pay that price with my life.” Strength was what they both needed now. Kíli closed his eyes tightly for a moment. Of course his brother would have some wise words to say about war, and about sacrifice. How little they knew - in practice - about the dangers they would face during the quest. He'd been so unprepared. The real tragedy was that Fíli's actions hadn't saved Kíli. He hoped he didn't blame himself too much, as Tauriel did. "I know, Fíli. I saw... I saw you fall." Deep down, Kíli had known what might happen on their journey. He'd been sworn to protect Thorin, and that was what he'd tried to do. That was why he hadn't backed down from any fight, and why he went with Thorin to kill Azog without a second thought. It was in their blood. "The moment I saw you, I felt a blind rage like I'd never known before, I couldn't... I don't remember much beyond that, but I know I fought. Tauriel found me, only she was too late. I did not know what happened to our uncle at the time, but..." He smiled sadly, hoping he didn't have to put it into words. "Our cousin Dain is King Under the Mountain now. Legolas tells me the mountain is prosperous, as is the rebuilt Dale." Fíli gripped his brother’s shoulder even harder, and quickly had to let go before he could do any damage. Kíli had watched him fall? He shook his head. He could not begin to understand how that must have felt. Fíli couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to watch his brother fall. The pain was unbearable. Then just like that, Fíli’s attention snapped back to the present. He understood the rage, because he could feel it boíling up inside him. “Tauriel found you, too late?” Fíli’s eyes were wide and he took a step back. “No! I made a promise to keep you alive.” There it was. Fíli, Kíli, and Thorin would meet their end and the line broken, picked up by Dain. It should have been Thorin. It should have been Fíli and Kíli by their uncle’s side, watching Dale live and thrive. There was the dread, the fear that Fíli had shared with him the moment he was taught about his heritage. His biggest fear had come to pass and he would be helpless to stop it. Fíli fell to his knees and grabbed the loose ends of his brother’s clothing. “I’ve failed you.” He wished the anger was still there, but he could only feel grief. Kíli felt the wave of grief hit him again too, thinking about how the promise that Azog had made so many years ago had finally come to fruition: he'd seen the senior line of Durin to its end. The only things that made Kíli feel any better about it was knowing they had won the battle in the end, and that Erebor had recovered. Dain would be a good king. "Fee," he murmured, joining his brother kneeling on the floor. "It was my choice. Everything I did, it was my choice. I knew what I was doing when I rushed the orcs. You did what you could. You were trying to save us. You should be proud of that. We both knew what might happen. It is not your fault." It wasn't often that he was the one consoling his older brother, and Kíli found it strange to do so now. "We helped ensure the safety of our homeland for our kin. That means something, Fíli." In his heart, Fíli understood that his brother was right, and Fíli knew exactly what he would have done if he had watched his brother meet his end. He would have charged the orcs with everything he had and wouldn’t stop until they were all taken out. “I know.” He replied. They had won in the end. That did mean a great deal to him, but yes, he wished it would not have cost him the price of his brother and his uncle. “It seems we have been provided a second chance in life,” Fíli started to say. “I know this land is very strange, but it sounds like we have friends here, and we have each other.” He managed to get his strength together to give his brother a smile. “What do you say, brother? Are you ready to have another adventure with me?” At first, Kíli wasn’t sure how his brother would react. Would it be that easily accepted? Kíli knew he still had trouble with the knowledge. Three weeks wasn’t a long enough span of time to get over something that devastating, and Fíli had only just found out. Kíli wouldn’t have blamed his brother if he needed more time to come to terms with it, and to forgive himself. So he waited patiently, sitting back on his heels, watching every flicker of emotion on his brother’s face. When he finally smiled, Kíli beamed back at him. “Do you have to ask?” he answered, a playful, teasing tone back in his voice again. “I think this is going to be the best one yet.” He stood and reached down to help his brother back to his feet. “Come, we have a lot to catch up on. Tauriel’s going to be so glad you’re here. I think she’s getting tired of taking care of me all by herself.” |