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Tweak says, "Look what I can do!"

Ben Reilly | Spider-Man (thesensational) wrote in thedisplaced,
@ 2020-06-12 21:06:00

Entry tags:

ben reilly / spider-man (94), peter parker / spider-man (mcu)

[Filter to Peter Parker]

So, how are things going over at the House of Iron and Spiders?

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	heyeveryone 2020-06-14 06:10 am UTC (link)
	Uh, okay, considering. MJ told me she was leaving. I mean, I know she wasn't like your kid but you were her guardian. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thesensational 2020-06-14 06:17 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, she mentioned that to us. Or well, the eventually. Which I get the pull of family and this isn't the first ward I've lost. Even if Loki is on the official paperwork and all. But my loss won't be as much as others. She also mentioned that you were thinking of staying. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	heyeveryone 2020-06-14 06:18 am UTC (link)
	Yeah. I mean, I guess I haven't really decided yet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thesensational 2020-06-14 06:25 am UTC (link)
	Well, the plus side seems like it's not an on the spot, you must decide now sort of situation, so there's time. The minus side, there's time to really go crazy over that pro and con list. Wanna talk or should I just switch over to talking about the new milkshake selection at JJs? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	heyeveryone 2020-06-14 06:29 am UTC (link)
	Are you staying? You know, since you're married and all. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thesensational 2020-06-14 06:36 am UTC (link)
	I'm staying, but it's not as simple as just the whole being married thing. Even if Loki had chosen to leave, as much as it'd hurt, I'd stay. This is it for me. Maybe, years from now when I'm ready, I'll chose to go back for that last hurray, but for now, I'm going to take all the time I can get. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

heyeveryone
2020-06-14 02:22 pm UTC (link)

Yeah.

It's just that back home there's stuff going on. MJ and Ned are both leaving probably soon. It's not like I'm really reason enough to stay, right? And they'll have a Peter back home when they leave so they won't be missing anything. I think MJ would probably prefer that Peter anyway.

But it just feels like staying is selfish on top of losing my friends. Like here Tony is alive, and he's my dad and I have a little sister, even though I really miss May. She has a Peter, too. And also I was outed and set up for all these terrible crimes Mysterio did so I'm probably just going to be on the run or in jail and it's not like I'll see anyone anyway.

So why does it feel so wrong that I just want to stay here? I just want to go to MIT and not be outed. I got accepted and everything. I doubt that's going to be the case back home.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thesensational
2020-06-14 10:42 pm UTC (link)

Ok, so, I know different universes and circumstances, so this might not apply, but it's what I know from my experience with Spiders of the Parker DNA strand and that whole wrong feeling. We have this tendency to not let ourselves have good things easily. Whether it's guilt or 'with great power comes great responsibility' or just Parker luck knocking us down enough times to make us not trust when good things happen. There's got to be a trick or the other shoe is going to drop or something.

And having a chance to live a life you definitely can't have back at home is a pretty big and good thing. Especially when you aren't abandoning your world. You're still there, doing what needs to be done. You staying here won't cause harm to your world. Which just makes that good thing seem too good to be real and also infuriating.

But it's not wrong to want that good thing.

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