STEVE/BUCKY.
I already know your stance on all of this, but you know I don't completely agree with that, right? It was still my hands. I could have fought the brainwashing harder. I could have broken free earlier.
I did revert, one time, back in Hawaii. It was right after the first time I got a memory dump with the Winter Soldier memories. I got through it, but I never got deprogrammed. Betsy did that here. Then with the last update, I got memories from the time with Thanos and the snap. Shuri's deprogramming was in there too, but there's a large, irrational part of me that's still afraid that something might crop.
Natasha has the kill switch, if it does and I can't be stopped. Betsy put it in, but Nat's the only one who knows the words. It helps, knowing someone that won't hesitate to use them if needed has them, but it doesn't stop the nightmares. And with Howard showing up, I guess it's just a reminder of it all and I'm not handling it very well.