e i l y (blondebarkeep) wrote in the_dome, @ 2013-07-13 20:07:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | 04-05-2017, eily, eily and lochlan, lochlan |
we will pull through this
Who: Eily and Lochlan
Where: the hospital
When: late morning/early afternoon
Lochlan awakened slowly. It was sort of like gradually becoming aware that things were happening around him that were real and not dreams. He’d had lucid dreams. Some of them so real that he struggled not to believe as reality split from dream and his mind surfaced. The first thing he felt was pain. Not intense but there were the faint achings of things that he had never awakened to before. He didn’t immediately remember the wolf attack though the imagery of teeth and claws raced across the surface of his thoughts along with the rest of his senses.
Everything mixed together. Sound, smell, sensation. He heard the clattering of metal and clicking of heels on linoleum. He smelled the salty scent of tears and the sweet waft of cherries... and maybe cherry blossoms. A face flitted across his mind’s eye too quickly for him to catch as pain bloomed more intensely than before. He groaned and was propelled further into awakening.
Shifting, he realized he was in a bed and there were sharp, pointy things inside his skin. He felt as though he’d been beaten up by a pack of thugs but he couldn’t recall anything like that. His eyelids felt too heavy to lift but he attempted anyway, his voice a croak that instinctively whispered the name that matched the smell and the face that went with it. “Eily?”
Eily had been shifting her time between Patrick's room and Lochlan's. The girls were around as well, doing pretty much the same, though she thought they were down having some food at the moment. She'd insisted someone eat something and pretend to be healthy for the day. When Lochlan started to stir, she'd almost held her breath, then she was rushing over to the bed, her chair thunking back into place as she nearly toppled it. "Lochlan?" she said in return, voice hoarse. Reaching for his hand, though he was kind of a mess of IV needles and injury, she didn't quite know what to do with herself.
The sweet, feminine scent rushed toward him suddenly and his eyelids fluttered to sound of the familiar voice saying his name. The sound of the chair reverberated so loudly that he winced. "Be still a little, okay, Eily?" he groaned though he was slightly smiling. There was another smell on the air that wasn't her and wasn't the cold, antiseptic smell of the hospital which was his guess for the origin of the metal barbs in his skin. IVs. Something bad had happened, he was injured obviously. Why else would Eily be here, sounding hoarse rather than kicking his ass for falling asleep on her couch yet again?
"What… what happened? Why are you here?"
She stilled, though wasn't sure why he was saying that. Migraine? Probably. Something like that, anyways. So instead, she did reach out, and put her hand gently on an uninjured part of his arm, the best she could do in the circumstances. "I'm here, because I'm waiting for you to be awake enough to thump you for getting hurt." she said, voice cracking a little bit. She'd managed to hold her shit together while out with Nic, because she'd been in Survival Mode.
She'd been determined that she was going to help people. But since she'd gotten back to the hospital, and seen Patrick and Lochlan's true states, it was a lot harder for her to keep it together. It didn't mean she'd lose it altogether, she wouldn't, she was one hell of a strong woman when she wanted to be, but no matter how strong she was, she was too aware that she'd nearly lost her brother and her cousin in one fell swoop. It wasn't a great thing to deal with. "There were wolves. Patrick got hurt too...you're both here. And you're both going to be fine do you understand me? At no point am I entertaining the idea of you not being okay, so just...smile and nod, and do it, because I say so."
"Thump me for getting hurt. So rational, Eils." Lochlan tried to laugh but his ribs rejected the expansion of muscles with a sudden, bruise-y twinge. His face contorted with amusement and pain and he groaned again. "You gotta stop that, woman. I think I'm intact so yeah, I'll be fine. But wow, this shit hurts. Am I missing body parts? Be brutal, I can take it." He didn't feel like he was missing anything but he needed something to ground his thoughts because her smell was so heady. His eyes finally opened completely and he stared at her in mild shock as what she'd said suddenly sank in. "Wolves? They got Pat too? What the hell?"
Eily twitched hard when she saw him in pain like that, and she was reaching for him, putting a firm hand on his good shoulder to sort of keep him down and anchored. "You're not missing body parts." she told him. "You're just...really tore up. Like you have more stitches than you can count. Literally. I know you get fuzzy after thirty three." she teased, even if her voice was still strained with emotion.
"And yes. Super wolves that like to shrug off shot gun blasts and hits with hatchets." she told him. I guess they got Patrick on his way home from the brewery, and...just...yeah. But he'll be okay too." she said, because she was demanding that out of her reality.
Lochlan felt her response and it worried him that there was more going on than he was aware of. He tried to make light to relax them both. "I hear girls love scars. On a scale of one to ten how attractive am I now?" It was supposed to be a joke but his brow furrowed with pain alongside the amusement. "Guess I'll be the sexiest bastard on the block unless Pat decided to try to outgun me on that front."
Shrug off shot gun blasts? His mind jerked into hyper-color. Pink being the focus. Chiri. She'd had nothing but a tripod last he'd seen and he'd run away like a little bitch. He wanted to break something with his bare hands. Instead he asked quietly, "Was anyone else hurt?" He wasn't sure if he wanted to know but he needed to know if he'd left behind a tiny woman instead of defending her. He wasn't sure he'd ever forgive himself if something had happened to her.
"You're at a solid 'kicked puppy'." Eily retorted. "You aren't scarred yet, so don't jump the gun." she said, his attempt at humor there working, even if she saw it for what it was. After all, she was doing the same thing. "But it's true, they do love scars, if they're sexy enough. Like, giant face grossening scars, no, but other ones, yes. You'll be a huge hit." she added. "And something tells me you won't have to try and beat Patrick out for the position." What with his commitment to being a solitary curmudgeon.
"...are you talking about the girl who came in with you?" Eily asked. She'd talked to her briefly in the early morning, after she'd got back from ambulance runs and Chiri had been going to go home to sleep. "She wasn't hurt. She waited here for the night, but went home this morning to sleep. She said she'd be back later. Is she the reason you haven't been around?" she asked. "...because now's the totally appropriate time to be grilling you on your whereabouts, since I haven't seen you and you haven't seen fit to call me?" she asked. "And that might sound like a guilt trip, but that's just because it's a guilt trip."
"Ah yeah, girls love puppies," he said in a dreamy, playful tone. Mostly because she'd said she wanted to thump him. And when she confirmed he had scarrage that might possibly be sexy he pushed a little further. "I've always been a huge hit. Now I'll be legendary. Thanks, Eily." He half winked at her but started to cough which worked a thread of pain across his brow. Everything hurt so much right now and everything smelled so much that, if he hadn't been a guy, he'd've sworn he was pregnant. In fact… he was almost wondering anyway. He smelled whatever she used to wash her hair and whatever she'd last washed her hands with.
He almost asked her about the smell when she mentioned another girl. "She… she came in with me? Pink hair? She won me at the auction and we were out last night for our date. But other than that… no. She's not why I haven't been around." He tried to make sense of that. That Eily had noticed he hadn't been around even though she always seemed to be hounding him to find a way to not live off others' hospitality. He'd lived off hers mainly because he wanted to feel close to the woman he'd been so close to while they'd fought side by side to keep the O'Reilly clan safe from the Zs. "I texted you," he offered lamely. "You didn't answer so I thought you were attempting to dis-enable me to sleep on your couch."
"They do love puppies, yes, but I don't know if it's what you're going for." Eily said. She winced again when he coughed, and she watched him, hoping it would all calm down. "Pink hair." she confirmed, moving on to that topic. "And right. The auction." she said, nodding. "Well cool that you're going with it. She seemed...nice. Concerned, definitely. A little strange, but nice. And young." she added. "And if she isn't why you haven't been around why is it? I've been worried." she admitted. "And you did? Shit. I must have missed it, sorry." she told him. "And whatever, my couch is always open. You can even have a room, which you totally know."
"Indian giver," he grumbled good-naturedly. Lochlan frowned at her assessment of Chiri. Whatever Chiri was outwardly, she was a mother effing badass as far as he could tell. She'd kicked a wolf's ass to the curb with a tripod and managed to get him to the hospital. He didn't think another girl could've done that. Well? Eily could've, he knew that. He'd been there. But she wasn't exactly a "girl."
"Eh, I've been sleeping at the pub a lot I guess. And," he said a bit breathlessly as he tried to adjust himself upward in his bed only to be met with aching and limited muscle response. His thought was lost but his reflexes played on her words. Was she saying she wanted him around? Was that something? No. Couldn't be. Right? "Don't worry about it. You're here now. And you smell." He couldn't help but add that last bit. Every time she made a minute shift he could smell her. It was triggering other parts of him too. Sense memory at the top of that list reminding him of days taking 2 hour shifts to sleep in extremely close quarters to keep everyone safe. "Good. You smell good," he added with a chuckle.
"Don't move, just...lie still, or something or I can help, or whatever, but don't be moving around like that!" Eily snapped first. Just like with Patrick during the incident, she got kinda snippy when she was concerned. "At the pub? Jesus, Lochlan, no. Just no. Stop that." she said, giving him a Look. "Just come back to my place. I don't want you sleeping at the damn bar, and just--that's stupid so don't." she finished.
When he said she smelled, there was an immediate shocked look on her face, and she even tugged her shirt out to smell it, to see if she'd needed to change. There was still patches of blood on her clothing, though they were long dried, and she'd scrubbed up well after the fact. But she hadn't showered since before Patrick had gotten attacked and it had been a long busy night... Then he corrected that notion. "Don't tell a girl she smells! You phrase that as 'you smell nice', or something!" she insisted. "But...thanks. I do? I've been out running the ambulance all night when I haven't been wearing a hole in the corridors waiting for more news about you two."
Her concern touched him and he tried to stay still though it wasn't easy. Did he have ADD or something? He didn't enjoy the twinges of pain but he couldn't seem to manage to just be still. And her attitude didn't help because he liked it. He knew what annoyed Eily sounded like and that wasn't it. That was concerned Eily and he took a deep breath against aching ribs to take that in and enjoy it for a moment. "What?" he asked after a moment. "The pub is comfy."
Lochlan choked on a laugh because Eily sounded so much like Avery that he couldn't help it. He made a mental note to tell Avery to get on with the bonding with Eily because she'd have a kindred spirits of sorts there. At least one who would agree with her on how to tell him about interacting with girls properly. Apparently being mauled by a wolf and recovering in the hospital didn't exempt him one bit from that and he loved it. "You smell like cherries and hard work and heaven," he answered quietly, his eyelids fluttering down to his cheek again. "It's nice, Eily. I've missed you too."
"Well, I don't care if the pub is comfy, no family of mine is sleeping there." Eily said. "Just, come back to my house." she told him. "You can even keep pretending you don't live there if you really want, and sleep on the couch, but whatever, just...yeah. No more sleeping at the pub." she said firmly.
She blinked at his description of what she smelled like. She sort of vaguely remembered squirting a little perfume on ...what, yesterday morning? Something like that. Could he still smell that? She opened her mouth to speak, but he said it. "...yeah." she said softly. Because that was it. She just missed him. And apparently he'd missed her too. It at least helped her feel like he hadn't wandered off forever or anything, not that she ever imagined that happening in the first place. It was Lochlan. They'd been very very close before the zombies happened, just clicking as people, and when the undead did overrun the world, they'd gotten even closer. They worked well together, and so she never truly feared that he'd up and abandon her or something. But it was still nice to hear that it wasn't just her. As much as she tried to encourage him to get on his feet, it wasn't like she didn't want him around. She just wanted him to pretend to be a grown up sometimes. It was for his benefit, not hers that she gave him shit about things. "I miss you. So...yeah. You have things to do."
She ticked them off on her fingers. "Healing up completely, coming back to the house, not sleeping at the pub, never ever ever winding up here ever again." she said. "Are we clear?"
Lochlan had had a few moments lately where he'd stood outside her house and watched the porch light come on, confused as to why he couldn't seem to go in. Then turned around and went for a run in the park before crashing in the pub. It didn't make sense to him, but he supposed, when he did think about it, that was a distinctly girly thing to be worrying about and so he'd put it out of his head. And, in essence, put her out of it too. Things had been simpler when they'd been fighting zombies. There wasn't anything to be confused about when it came to being completely in rhythm with one another for the sake of survival. Since that had ended, they'd remained close but had slowly drifted a little in spite of it. Subconsciously he felt the answer to his problem. He had yet to meet anyone else he could be that in sync with and that was a very high bar. Consciously he tried not to even linger on the subject of Eily when she wasn’t in front of him.
Still she was his favorite person and the fact she was here, getting on his case, pleased him. His eyes may have been half closed but he was grinning that shit-eating grin he did so well while watching her count off his to-do list on her fingers. "Let's see if I got this right." He raised a hand and put down his fingers as he spoke, wincing and half-laughing because it hurt. "Sleeping in, skipping shifts, loafing around your house, and drinking--" He groaned as the wheels of the meal service cart in the hallway screeched like nails on a chalkboard through his brain and the conflicting smells of food made his stomach wrench. He cussed, his nose wrinkled in disgust. "Can you have them run a pregnancy test on me? I swear I have morning sickness or something."
Him smiling like that was a good sign. It meant he was about to be a shit, but was listening, at least. Eily had been about to retort, but that got shoved to the side when he had that reaction, and she was back to concerned. "...what's going on?" she asked. "And I really hope you aren't pregnant, or I really, really missed something about you all these years." she said, reaching out to feel his forehead, not even clear on why. Maybe because it was just a go-to thing when you were worried about someone. So even if she knew taking an inaccurate temperature would do nothing at all, it seemed to be ingrained in her somewhere. "What's going on, hon?" she asked. "Do you need me to get a nurse?"
Whatever was on that food cart had both turned his stomach and strangely made him hungry at the same time. He groaned again at the irritating sensation of being both sickened and salivating simultaneously. “The smell of food is both overpowering and making me want to throw up. Yet I’m super interested in getting something to eat all of a sudden too.” He smiled at her taking his temp. It felt hot behind his eyes when he closed them, which was usually a pretty good sign that he had a temp. “Guess I’m either coming down with the flu or I’m highly allergic to being mauled by wolves.” He shrugged and winced, trying to get comfortable in his bed without knocking too many of his wounds against the sides. “You could get me a nurse, sure. That really cute one with the pink sweater, okay?”
Eily frowned. He did seem to have a temperature. He was warmer than what she deemed usual, at any rate. Was there infection? Was he getting feverish because he was fighting something off? "...it's not something to joke about, those things could have been rabid, for all we know." she told him. "The one I hit with my hatchet seemed to not notice, so much." she added. That clear, heavy concern was still on her features, as she looked at him, nibbling at her lower lip. "...okay." she said. "I'll find her." She'd even go deliberately find a cute nurse in a pink sweater right now, because he asked. Right now either Patrick or Lochlan could ask for the moon and she'd do her level best to get it.
Lochlan needed to joke because he didn’t want to think about the entire negative aspect of his situation just now. He was forcing himself not to relive that attack and the fact he’d left Chiri behind and run away like a scared little girl. If someone else had done it, he’d have handed the guy his own rear end. He squeezed his lids tightly shut and sighed, turning a bit more serious. “They gave me shots for that, Eils. I remember because they hurt like a bitch and some shithead doctor was grumbling that they had such a limited amount of the stuff because they had never planned for rabid animals anywhere near the dome.” He rubbed his stubbled face and opened his eyes again to look at her. “I’m sure a nurse’ll be back soon. Stay. Tell me about your Xena, Warrior Princess moment instead.”
Eily had to blink hard for a few moments, also having to shove everything aside yet again. But she was still worried, about both of them, and even if she had assurances that they'd both be okay, she knew shit happened. Sometimes, things didn't go as planned. Sometimes, the world just sucked, and that was that.
It was the first time she was dealing with the very real idea of losing a family member since they'd got to the dome, and she was kinda sorta not going to be truly okay for a long time. But she swallowed hard, and nodded. "It wasn't much of a Xena moment." she told him when she trusted her voice not to crack again. "Just...I was home, and then heard all this noise, and I opened up the door, and there was just...blood. What seemed like all over and then there was this growl in the dark." Her focus wasn't on him specifically, more like a middle distance as she replayed the events in her head. There was a slight tremor that started up in one hand, and she worried them together without realizing it.
Lochlan watched her and the more he saw, the more furrowed his brow got. Not with pain but with concern for her. He’d seen her stand down a horde without so much as batting an eyelash. She’d been so good at it. Hell they both had together. But what he was seeing right now made him wonder just how much of an emotional toll it had taken on her that he’d never noticed because he’d not been viewing her from the same vantage point as now. Prone. In a hospital bed covered in bandages that were obviously in need of being redressed. His first instinct was to joke. To try to get her to laugh because laughter cleared the mind of any unpleasantness, right? Except she didn’t want to laugh. He could see it on her face.
Biting the inside of his cheek he reached out a hand to take hers. He gave it a squeeze and looked up at her silently for a long moment. “You’re the bravest person I know, Eils. And to be honest, I’d rather this situation never have to be reversed. I can take being in the bed but I don’t think I could ever be okay looking at you in it.”
Shit, she was cracking, and she knew it. Lochlan didn't do serious moments all that often, so she was failing at keeping up her end of the bargain that they laughed and joked around twenty four hours a day if possible. She squeezed his hand back, taking a second to find her voice again. "I thought we were done, Loch." she admitted, smiling in the way that betrayed that it could be a wince of pain in just a second. "With that touch-and-go bullshit, where anyone we had left could be ripped away at any moment. And I just clicked right back into place, y'know, survival mode? And it was without even blinking. But this part? Looking at you there, seeing all that blood on the porch, seeing Patrick's blood all over my hands, feeling him fading as we tried to get him from the house to the ambulance?" she shook her head.
"I'll be okay because I have to be okay, but I just...I thought we were done, and the worst thing I had to worry about with Patrick was that he was turning into a grouchy old man before he has a right to, and that with you, I'd have yet another conversation with a girl who loves you to death but can't deal with the flakeyness. This," she said, gesturing to the bed and instruments around him, "Wasn't supposed to come up again. And I know, you can't predict life, and all that, but why the fuck are there wolves trying to eat my family in the dome?" she said, biting her lower lip again, harder than before.
"I'm sorry. I'll get it together." she promised.
Lochlan coughed a laugh, unable to help himself from weeding through all of what she'd said and pinpointing on that one part -- the girls and his flakeyness. Unofficially he knew that she'd talked to some of his exes. That she'd explained for him and he'd always wondered why she bothered. Officially he was oblivious to that and to the girls he'd hurt. Because officially the answer to his reasons for that could never be voiced. It hardly made sense to him. It was sure as hell not going to make sense to Eily. He still wasn't able to think about it head on and so a joke started to form on his lips, the stupid expression brightening his eyes for a moment but he bit it back.
"Stop, okay? You're allowed to not be together. You're allowed to feel bad about this because hell, this is fucking shit, Eily! I thought we were done too. I mean, obviously. I'm not on my game at all and if I had kept up training, I wouldn't be here at all. So dammit get mad. Get mad and cuss me out and tell me just what a weakling I am because I deserve it for putting that look right the fuck there on your face." He stabbed the air with one finger on his other hand, ignoring that it enflamed his ribs with pain to the point that tears were glistening in his eyes.
He swept them away with the heel of his hand and looked away from her, taking a deep breath. He hadn’t felt scared until now. Not since he’d been in the moment with it. But she’d reminded him that he could’ve died and he wasn’t okay with that. He was scared and he was not going to face her until he got that under control.
"Zombies and wolves--different things, Lochlan, so don't go thinking this is something you should have been able to deal with without issue. Patrick is just as much a survivor as we are, and he got taken down too. You two and a ton of other people, a lot not so lucky as you guys. So stow it. You did your best, and you lived and I'm calling it good there. And no, I'm not allowed to not be together. Someone has to hold this family together, and when there are teenage girls involved who hate me in the first place, then it's even worse." she said, scrubbing her hands over her face. She drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
She eyed him, not looking at her, then reached out and grabbed his chin, to turn him back in her direction. "You. Me. We're getting through this." she said firmly, holding his gaze. "You understand? We're going to suck it the fuck up, put on our survivor pants, and deal. Because we have to. And if that means we both have to dip into our old mindset, then we do. Just...concentrate on healing up first, I'll take the first watch." she said, meaning she'd be on duty til he was up for helping her with the load. "However long it is."
Lochlan was silent as she talked, though his brow furrowed when she mentioned the teenage girls hating her. He couldn't imagine what any of them would have to hate Eily for and he made a mental note to ask Avery a few questions when he next saw her. Maybe lay down some law like he had when they'd been in survival mode. There wasn't a lot he could do, he knew, from this bed to enforce the law but he'd make sure it was understood if that's what it came to. He'd have Eily's back however he could in the face of all of this shit. And that's what it was. His brief moment of fear ended. Not abruptly but slowly as she spoke and verbally kicked his ass into gear.
"Right, you're absolutely right" he said, his voice firm with resolve as he looked back at her. "There is no fail, only prevail," he spoke his mantra of old. His backbone didn't feel solid as steel just yet but it would get there. He knew it would because he'd done it before. He shook his head, shaking off the lingering sensation of fear his mortality had brought him. He'd survived both zombies and wolves, despite their differences. "And if they're too different things, yet we both survived them, all the O'Reillys can. Thank you. I guess I just needed a reminder that my ass is not a hat and get my head out of it. I'll be there to relieve you as quickly as I can. Pat too."
Eily leaned over and kissed Lochlan's forehead. "Take your time. I've got this." she promised. And she would. How, she didn't know, but that had never stopped her before. So, she was going to do it this time too, until her family was all better again. End of story.