Holland "Holly" Sharpe (ilicin) wrote in the_colony, @ 2011-01-09 22:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | holland sharpe, nathan theien, | holly and nate, ~ series: archive |
Weeks 25-32
WEEK 25: SUNDAY
Characters: Nate and Holly.
Location: Parlor.
Summary: Holly decides it’s time to do the awkward making up thing, and thankfully Nate agrees.
Rating: PG-13 for language.
It had been almost two weeks since Holly had so much as spoken a word to Nate. Even around the dinner table he had avoided speaking to the other man, and if he could he would turn around and walk the other way sooner than be in the same room with him. Making up with Mike over Quinn leaving had been easier than this, and with Jared … well, he hadn’t gotten the chance to make up with him.
Finally, Holly realized he was being a coward. Facing Nate after his confession was like facing all of the years he’d let himself be Holly instead of Holland - it was like admitting that had all been some huge mistake. Hadn’t he thought the flu epidemic could be just the thing to give him a new beginning? Better to cling to that optimism than drown in sorrow and crushing loneliness.
“Hey....” Holly’s voice, though hesitant, cut through the silence of the parlor. It was the room he and Nate had shared their first conversation, but he had a feeling this one would go a bit differently. He slipped his hands into the pockets of his faded jeans. “Mind if I join you?”
Nate had been reading again, really it was all he seemed to be doing with his free time these days. He had been engrossed and hadn’t realized that the other person had come in until he heard him speaking. He looked up and attempted to flash him what he hoped had been a somewhat genuine looking smile. He hadn’t talked to Holly since they day in the garage, and he could tell the other man had been avoiding him (to be honest, he hadn’t gone seeking Holly out either) and it was a little comforting that he was at least willing to be in the same room again.
“Sure.” Nate said after a moment, “It’s a pretty public room after all.” He smirked a bit.
“Ha,” Holly replied sarcastically, Nate’s smirk summoning the tiniest one of his own, “thanks for the heartfelt greeting, smartass.” He didn’t waste a moment thinking about the possibility of turning right around and never resolving this, instead forcing himself to take a seat on the couch.
“So, uh, if it’s not obvious I think we should stop the avoiding each other thing.” Holly sat with his legs crossed at the knee and his hands clutching each other in his lap. He wasn’t wearing any makeup, which made him feel completely ugly and exposed, but he’d done that on purpose. Nate would see the real lines of his face; how masculine he could look without powders and pastes suggesting otherwise. He’d also be able to see how pale Holly was. “Sorry I deceived you for a while there,” he said, “and sprung the truth on you without considering your feelings.” The words sounded well-worn and practiced, and that was because they were.
Nate just nodded, folded the corner of the page he had been reading and pushed it to the side before leaning forward. He looked up at Holly finally noticing that he wasn’t all dolled up like he usually was. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that, he didn’t want Holly to think the he had to walk around like that because of him, and at the same time he felt a little ridiculous for not noticing the more manly curves of his face.He grinned just a little bit.
“I don’t know if noticed, but I don’t really have feelings.” Nate joked, “but it ain’t nothin. I know I was dumb... with the avoiding you and shit, but I didn’t think you particularly wanted to talk to me.” He shrugged.
“I didn’t,” Holly confirmed, smiling faintly.
“I should be sorry, for not being a better friend. Or something. Cause I shouldn’t have made you feel bad about what you are. If wearing make-up makes you happy, do it.” Nate grinned, “I’m also bad at inspiring apology speeches. That’s usually Abby’s category.”
Holly’s smile widened. “Maybe not inspiring, but very sweet, thanks,” he said, feeling a lightness in his chest that he hadn’t experienced for a long time.
“What you said means a lot to me, but I think I’m the one who made myself feel bad about what I am.” Holly sighed, disentangling his hands from each other to comb his fingers through his side ponytail. He noticed he desperately needed a trim. “I’ve never felt good about it, not really. All I know is I’m gay and I think men’s clothing is boring.” The admission was followed by an eye roll. “Sounds so simple, but I’ve been trying to figure it out my whole life and I don’t think I’m any closer now than I was when I first realized it. Maybe even further away from knowing.
“Anyway,” he continued, after a beat of thoughtful silence, “glad we’re good. Now I can have free reign of the house again without worrying you’ll be in the place I need to go.”
Nate let out a rather ungraceful snort. “Listen, Holly, I have a feeling that if we had wound up in the same room before this, I probably would have just left. Hell, had I noticed you coming before you spoke to me, I probably would have grabbed my book and headed up to my room.” Holly made a face.
“Is your name really Holly?” He blurted, the thought just occurring to him. “I mean... It’s okay if it is or not. It’s just an odd thing to name your son.”
“My name is Holland,” he replied, with a short laugh. “Holly’s the short form. Take your pick.”
“Holland... like the dutch place?” He blinked, “No, thats a much more normal name.” He teased gently, to which Holly grinned and shrugged. “Holly it is. Unless you want me to start calling you Lando.”
“Lando?” Holly asked, obviously expending the effort to hold back laughter. “I might have murdered my parents long before the flu if they’d named me Lando, so no. Holly, Hol, A-Hole - they all suit me just fine. Those were my most popular nicknames.”
“A-Hole?” Nate repeated, practically roaring with laughter at the nickname, “I don’t get it. How the hell is ‘A-Hole’ better than Lando.” He held his breathe for a second or two to stop his laughter. “Luckily for me, Nathan doesn’t breed any weird nicknames.”
Holly couldn’t help but join in with Nate’s laughter, and he held his stomach as soon as it died down enough for him to speak. “Because I am an a-hole,” he explained happily, as if people normally thought being an asshole was positive. “As for Nathan, I might be able to think up something creative to call you.”
“Yeah, clearly, but it’s still a horrible nickname. It’s not even that creative.” He chuckled a little bit, shaking his head. He raised his eyebrow at Holly, his arms crossing in a somewhat challenging stance. “We’ll have to see about that, do your worst.”
Holly shook his head. “I’ll unveil it soon enough.” The truth was, the name Nathan really wasn’t all that inspiring and he didn’t know if he could whip up anything funny in such a short time.
“By the way,” Holly said, “do you need any help in the garage or outside in general? I’m sick and tired of doing housework.”
Nate shrugged a bit, “Sure, you can help out in the garage. I’m sure I can show you how to do a thing or two. It’d be nice to have company anyway.”
“You can say that again,” Holly agreed, especially Nate’s company. He was beginning to realize he wanted Nate’s company more than ever.