"You'll rarely, very rarely hear me say this, but I vouch for John on this. It's just how they are." Urk. Moving on!
"Put it on your head, and maybe later you'll get to play with it! There might be a bedazzler buried around somewhere..." As if Tosh's idea of improving the thing is glitzing it up-- he knows when it comes to her, it'd turn into some amazing, sleek, high-functioning-- right, tangents. "And if you order now, you'll also get these bonus cuff bracelets absolutely free!" Those are offered over as well, and they at least look less ridiculous than the head piece.