immortalje (immortalje) wrote in t_31_bang, @ 2009-10-11 23:01:00 |
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Current location: | home |
Current mood: | tired |
Entry tags: | entry, harry potter, rated: teen |
Fic: Mistakes and their Effects (WiP)
Title: Mistakes and their Effects
Author's Name: JE / immortalje
Disclaimer: I do not own anything you might recognise in this story. All characters, places and concepts belong to JK Rownling.
Warnings: implied Characters's death
Ratings: Teen
Summary: Dumbledore's mistakes cost Harry his life. Now Dumbledore travels to the past to fix what he did wrong only to realise just how badly he screwed up.
(Prompt) Somewhere along the lines, Albus Dumbledore lost sight of what truly matters. He doesn't realise any more just how his manipulations effect people and he doesn't realise that sometimes people crash. How will he undo his mistakes, if they already cost the life of Harry Potter? (I'd really love it, if Dumbledore travels through time)
Author's Note: This story is far from finished... as a matter of fact, it's just beginning. I sure as hell didn't expect this to become this big.
Words: 5261
Prologue – The Death of a Saviour
He had failed at his task. Not because the opposition was too strong or too ruthless, but because of his own actions. For too long he had been the person everybody went to with problems or when they had doubts about something and along the way, as he had to be a person of reassurance even as he himself wasn’t without doubts, he learned to stop listening to his doubts. In the beginning it had been good faced with the daunting war against Voldemort, but at one point he lost sight of why doubts were needed. He forgot how to differ between doubts born in fear and real doubts born in seeing the flaws in plans and actions.
The biggest example of dismissing doubts he shouldn’t have was Harry Potter. Despite the best of intentions to keep Harry from the fame and grow up like a normal boy, he had ignored all of the warnings that spoke of how little Petunia Evans had liked the wizarding world after she had been rejected by it. Despite having seen proof over and over again, he had refused to believe that someone could hurt their own blood. Not once, did he consider that dislike could go so far as to denounce someone of their own blood. At the same time, wasn’t that what most Purebloods did when casting squibborn relatives out?
Worst of all, in his plight to ignore his conscience, he had also refused to check on Harry. It was so easy to just say that anything he heard from the people he had placed close to the Dursley residence were normal family conflicts. He should have realised that he had fallen victim to the overall believe that he was unfailable. However, realising that yourself before anything terrible happens was hard if not impossible. That is why everybody needed someone else who could control their actions – only who checked what someone was doing that seemingly could not do wrong?
In the end, his status had bereft him of someone to control him, to check his decisions and their validity. He wished that he could bear the burden of that mistake, but he wasn’t. Everybody was too upset to realise that it was his fault, that his rumoured infality was just that – rumoured. Like with so many other burdens lain on Harry, this was just another occassion where he had to pay for the sins of other people. Only this time the price was his life. The danger that the wizarding world now faced without their champion was nothing more but their price for not seeing the truth. It is what they deserved. However, Harry hadn’t deserved to die, let alone live the life he, Albus Dumbledore, had arranged for him in his own blindness to his own faults.
As everybody grieved and he researched just how much he had failed Harry Potter, Albus knew that he had to fix this. Not just to save the wizarding world, but to give Harry Potter the chance at life he should have had. He knew of several rituals to send himself back in time – be it physically and mentally, as a ghost or mentally into the body of his younger self. Most of these where forbidden for various reasons. Not that he cared about that. There was only one thing he cared about – undoing his mistake – and one thing he worried about – forgetting his mistakes by being able to ignore results that haven’t happened yet. Until they happen again that is.
Chapter 1 – Planning
The first official Order meeting after Harry's death had been discovered was catastrophic. It was as if every bit of hope had been zapped out of them and Dumbledore realised just how much he had failed Harry. He was quite aware that Harry had wanted to be a member so he would know what was going on, but the majority had been against it based on Harry's age. However, now that he was dead they were despairing over defeating Voldemort without the saviour. Naturally, there were those that mourned the loss of the boy Harry had been and ironically, about half of those had been for Harry joining the Order because they had seen the truth: being called a saviour was difficult, but it was next to impossible if you didn't even know what was going on. They had also seen that Harry had grown up faster than everybody else and was quite aware of what being called a saviour entailed. The other half that mourned Harry as a boy, they had refused to see Harry as anything but a boy. He wasn't a saviour to them, but just Harry. The one thing, if he remembered Hagrid's tale correctly, that Harry had wanted to be.
"First of all, I must take the blame for Harry's demise. I believed he was save at 4 Privet Drive and the wards should have kept him save from outside forces. At least that is what I assumed as I connected several monitoring charms to the ward to know about Harry's well being. I failed to assure that the ward was working accordingly, which as it turned out it didn't. I also ignored the possibility that the danger might come from within the house," started Dumbledore.
However, before he could continue the majority of the wizards present started defending him. It pained him to see that things had progressed so far that nobody was willing to even accept him being infallible when he admitted it himself. Still, there was hope. Dumbledore noticed that there were several people who didn't defend him. They looked at Dumbledore with hurt mirroring the broken trust and a satisfaction to hear the truth being admitted. He made note of whom didn't jump to his defence because they too saw where he had failed.
It was next to impossible to discuss much after the heated defence of him had settled down, so he merely gave out the standard tasks they had done before. Once everyone had been given a task, Dumbledore said, "I think that's it for now. If anybody could think of ways to counter Voldemort's forces for the next meeting. It's more necessary than it has been before. Also, if Minerva, Severus, the Weasleys, Hermione, Moody and Remus could please remain behind? Thank you."
The room emptied pretty quickly and as Dumbledore watched, he knew that his tentative plan to fix this, would have to be a definitive. As soon as the room was empty he said, "I know that most of you know that this truly is my fault. For decades I gave my hardest not to start believing that I was infallible and knew everything, but without noticing I believed what everybody else believed and it was Harry that had to pay for it. That is unforgivable. Before this meeting I had considered using a ritual to send me back to my younger self and fix this before it was too late, but I think it's quite obvious that it needs to be done."
"Albus, we didn't notice anything. How much more could you have seen?" asked Molly and Dumbledore could see that she was caught between blaming him and not wanting to believe he could have failed.
Dumbledore sighed, "I'm not sure how much I could have seen, but I knew that Lily had a falling out with her sister about magic. I didn't believe that Petunia would be able to hurt her nephew because of it, but that is no excuse not to have checked on Harry in all those years. I've had people question me, but nobody ever demanded that I do something – why would they? I know this wasn't just a wake up call for me, but for everybody who could see that I wasn't doing my best but didn't want to contradict me."
"What assures me that you going back won't lead to the same result? You could just fall back without the result of your actions visible!" asked Minerva.
Dumbledore nodded, "That is my greatest fear. That I'll delude myself to the truth being real until it is too late again. I know of several rituals and it would be possible to use it on several people at once. Alternatively, I would share the memories of what happened with one of your past selves."
"Several of us might work better," added Moody, "If more than one person knows to be insistent it might carry more weight if you lose track of your task."
"What about a combination of both? Maybe one or two go with you – not too many to keep risks low of letting things slip, but share the risk with more to help back the others up?" suggested Hermione.
Dumbledore nodded, "A fabulous idea. I have the books for the ritual in my personal chambers at Hogwarts. As you're all probably aware this won't exactly be legal so you shouldn't be talking about this where anybody could overhear you."
Everybody present nodded.
The following weeks were hectic. It was decided that Minerva would join him on the trip to the past as his closest friend and that he would inform the other Head of Houses as well as Poppy Pomfrey. Their main goal was to get as close to Harry being placed with the Dursleys as possible, to reduce the amount of fixing they would have to do. However, the saver the rituals where the more imprecise the timing got.
Hermione Granger, along with Minerva McGonagall, researched muggle psychology with a focus on mentally abused children as well as depression and various other things they thought could come up. There was no use wasting time later on with research when they could start now after all.
Chapter 2 – Welcome To Hogwarts
The first thing Dumbledore did when he woke up was to check the date. While the ritual was save for everybody involved, it wasn't always as precise when it came to the point you travelled to. When he saw the date, he was a bit disappointed as it told him that Harry had turned 10 just two months ago. There was already a lot he had to make up for. On the other hand, it made some things simpler. He could tell the Minister that Harry's relatives had requested he be educated about the wizarding world a year early as they didn't feel comfortable telling him about the world that took their beloved relatives.
The important thing was that he still had time to help Harry and make up for the mistakes he had already made.
When he entered his office, he could already see the four Heads of Houses and Poppy Pomfrey waiting for him. He nodded to Minerva in thanks, glad that she had come with him.
"I'm sure that all of you are wondering just what you are doing here this early in the morning. What I'm about to tell you must be kept secret at all costs. I hope you don't mind swearing an oath of secrecy," started Albus.
Pomona, Filius and Severus nodded, although varying degrees of doubt were visible. It hadn't been the first time that they had sworn the oath, but it usually happened during the summer holidays when security matters for the coming year were discussed. Minerva of course new what this was all about and merely nodded, while Poppy kept a stoic face.
A quick oath later, Albus sat down behind his desk. Taking a deep breath, he continued, "Minerva and I travelled back from the future in the hopes to stop me from making grave mistakes that might as well lead to the destruction of the wizarding world."
Once again he could see the doubts, but they weren't voiced. So Albus went on, "You're quite aware that I do not believe that Voldemort was vanquished completely, and this will be proven true in the future. He will eventually be reborn – within this decade even. There is a prophecy regarding Harry Potter, destining him to be the one to defeat Voldemort. I tried to give him a childhood to enjoy and away from the fame, but that is where I failed."
"What do you mean?" asked Poppy.
Albus replied, "I want you to be aware that what happened in the future made it quite obvious that I started believing in my own infallibility as the rest of the wizarding world does. Even knowing what had happened and my own admittance of guilt… people didn't want to believe that I was at fault. I believed that placing Harry with his muggle relatives would give him a normal childhood and I never once thought that family could hurt their own – despite all the proof to the contrary I had already witnessed. Needless to say that I was not only wrong, but too arrogant to consider checking up on Harry. I don't think that he was physically abused, but the mental abuse he suffered was enough. Even more so his lack of trust in grown ups. This led to him carrying more weight on his shoulders than he could bear."
"As horrid as that is, why did you travel to the past and tell us?" asked Severus.
Minerva answered this time, "Because even if the prophecy hadn't been, a lot of people lost their will to fight. The day Harry Potter died was the day everybody stopped believing that Voldemort could be defeated. As for why Albus wasn't the only one to come back and why you're all being told – there wasn't anybody who would have fought him on his more outrageous ideas and plans and his greatest worry about coming back here was to forget that his actions have consequences without the reminder of the results."
"So we're supposed to act as your conscience?" asked Pomona.
Albus smiled, "In a way. What I need in this case is a reminder that I'm not always right."
"What is the next step then?" asked Severus.
Albus replied, "That would be getting Harry to Hogwarts. Right now, he has no knowledge of the wizarding world as his relatives are determined to keep that from him. I've also heard that he has been told that his parents were drunks who died in a car crash."
"That's so typical," snorted Severus, while the others gasped in outrage.
Minerva continued, "The next step will be Sirius Black. In the future it has been revealed that Peter Pettigrew is not only alive but had been the secret keeper of the Potters and was responsible for the explosion that cost the life of 13 muggles."
"And the Ministry was willing to give him another trial?" asked Filius.
Albus sighed, "As a matter of fact, Sirius never received a trial. Neither in the past nor in the future. However, he did manage to escape from Azkaban and offered the ancestral Black home as a base for fighting Voldemort."
"Do you know where Pettigrew is hiding?" asked Pomona.
Albus nodded, "If my information is correct than he his hiding in his animagus form, a rat, at the Weasleys. Although, he might be at Hogwarts. I do believe that he was the pet of Percy Weasley before young Ron started at Hogwarts."
When Severus didn't comment on that part, Albus grew worried. He knew that they never quite moved past the events of their childhood and that Severus was still bitter about it. Although, maybe knowing about Sirius' innocence before he could escape did change the perceptions slightly – and maybe it was already knowing that Sirius was at Azkaban for a crime he didn't commit after going unpunished for something that might as well have costs Severus' live.
"However, the most important part right now is getting young Harry to Hogwarts," continued Dumbledore, reminding himself to focus on the things that could be done.
Everybody nodded while Severus scowled, "And who's going to fetch him?"
"I will go myself. It was my failure that led to his death and as the responsible person I'll have to fix it… knowing just what I doomed him to will be important," replied Albus.
Before a new discussion could be started, Minerva said, "I do believe that we're expected in the Great Hall. Breakfast should be served shortly."