She told him that something would come back, and all he could do was shake his head mournfully and find it hard to believe. It was horrible, it was too cruel, that the island could take this from him. Something that he could cling to and know that he'd done something right, that there was one relationship he hadn't completely fucked up.
"Well, I think we both know that there really is something fucking wrong with me," he snapped back, almost hissed, and far too honestly. While the 'fine' had seemed insincere, this was much closer to his real feelings. It had even taken him by surprise, not having really intended to let it slip out. She turned, and the ridiculous urge to just start weeping was back, although fortunately he managed to control himself.
He sighed again, looking away from her, at the water or the sand or nothing in particular. It was frightening, being so open with feelings. The danger was that once he let something slip, this whole backlog of horrible emotions would come spilling out in a fucking tsunami and drown the pair of them. And maybe she'd never look at him the same way again. He liked that she thought he was amazing, in all honesty. He didn't know if she would like the truth, quite so much. That he was actually an absolute mess, barely holding it together, that just about everything he did was an act to cover up just how completely fucked he felt under the surface.
"It doesn't feel like I'm keeping it together," he admitted eventually. It was just that the breakdown was happening on the inside, as they always did. "I don't know what I can say. I'm not fine? That's just going to make you want to try and fucking- fix it, and you can't, so-" he shrugged slightly, every word sounding quite bitter. He wasn't angry at her at all, he just didn't know how he was meant to cope with this kind of fucked up situation.