She didn't hold him responsible. Well, that was very refreshing. It seemed like absolutely everyone did- even people he'd thought would have had his back had thrown him in the deep end when it came down to it. And he didn't know why he was even fucking surprised. He was surprised at her tame reaction, but relieved at the same time. He didn't want to fuck up his relationship with one of the only people he actually cared about. Okay, maybe the only person, now that he was stuck on the island.
"Fucking deep shit. Like- let's fucking hope that I'm stuck here for the rest of my life kind of shit," he told her.
He took a slow drink, and thought about it. He wasn't sure if he should elaborate, but she was asking- and for some reason he felt that she deserved the full story, and he would just have to fucking hope that she didn't hate him after hearing it.
"I leak a lot. I told you that, already. Confidentiality... look, if they fuck up, I'm going to make sure people know about it, because I want them fucking gone, and I'm not saying that's moral or good but- you know, people don't know what they think. The public? They're fucking mental. The public buy the Daily Mail and vote BNP, you know? If I see the Tories doing some nasty shit, you bet I'm telling The Guardian or whoever," he explained, hoping that she could at least understand that. He didn't see it as a bad thing. He was just exposing the truth about them, after all.
"Basically- the Tories brought in a housing bill that ended up leaving this guy homeless, and he- well, he fucking killed himself," he told her, in all seriousness. There was nothing he could joke about anymore, the seriousness of it all had come crashing down.
"It was- the emails that were leaked, it's just fucking- insensitive joke after insensitive joke, you know, fucking schoolyard shit? But the guy had mental health problems. The government- the Tories- they fucking drove him to suicide, and I thought that people should know that. Except it's illegal, you know? I- acquired his medical records, and I leaked it, so everyone would know just what they had done to drive a mentally unstable man over the edge," he told her. It sounded almost like he was the good guy.
"The thing is, Grey, the only thing I cared about was that it made them look bad, and I've fucking- they have evidence. They have fucking photographic evidence of me holding onto a fucking- folder with this guys fucking NHS number on it- and I- there's no fucking talking my way out of it. I'm fucked."