Steven Grant Barnes (sickbuttsteve) wrote in spinningcompass, @ 2018-04-08 18:58:00 |
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Steve knew it was risky. There were any number of magical loopholes that could be put in play. Any number of things that could go wrong. But he felt like it was his only option. He'd tried to just deal with it. To accept the knowledge that he only had 13 years left. And then there was the waiting. "Be patient" Richie had told him. "We'll figure something out. We have time." All of that was true, to a point. But he couldn't get it out of his head that it would be something undetected. Something that just came out of nowhere and killed him without any way to prevent it. And something as simple as a defect in his heart that nobody even knew was there. He couldn't deal with that. Couldn't handle the thought of Bucky having to deal with that. And he hated the idea of leaving Bucky alone. Especially knowing that he'd never be able to move on. That he would spend the rest of his life lonely because of Steve's health. Steve made his way to Isabel's apartment, not wanting to do any of this in the middle of the food court. He didn't want anybody to end up overhearing and telling Bucky. Or anyone for that matter. He knew that his parents and his husband might have a problem with him making a wish to make everything better. That they, and the doctors, might even try to stop him. He couldn't let that happen. Taking a deep breath, he knocked on her door. --- Isabel was in the middle of folding her laundry when she heard the knock on the door. She raised an eyebrow and checked her phone, making sure she hadn't missed a text from Dean saying he was on his way. With no missed text, she was still confused as she answered, but the confusion soon turned to a smile. "Hey there, sugar. Come on in." She stepped aside and motioned for him to enter. "Can I get you anything?" Isabel wasn't quite sure how but she'd always been able to tell the difference between Steve and Steven. She figured it had more to do with how they dressed than anything else. She started walking toward the kitchen. ---- "Um....some water would be great." He nodded. Steve ran his fingers through his hair and looked around her apartment. "You have a nice place." He called after her. ---- Isabel went into the kitchen and got two glasses of water. She also got a tin of cookies that she had set aside just in case he decided he wanted some. "Thank you, sweetie." She grinned as she came back into the living room. She set the tray down on the coffee table and cleared the laundry off the couch. "Well, have a seat. What's going on?" ---- Steve nodded his thanks as he took a seat and picked up one of the glasses of water, taking a drink. "Not much." He made a face and drank a little more water. "That's not actually true. There's a lot." He sighed heavily. ---- Isabel reached over and patted his knee. "What's wrong, sugar?" She really did hate seeing any of the people she considered family with anything bothering them. ---- Steve held the glass in both hands, looking down into the water for a few moments. "Um....Bucky came back in time for a little bit. He was 42." He took another drink of water. ----- Isabel tilted her head. That shouldn't have been such a bad thing. "You two still happily married?" She asked tentatively. ---- Steve closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. He was trying to get through all of this without crying, but he wasn't sure he'd be able to. "No." He bit his lip. "He um....had both sets of rings on a chain around his neck." Steve started to fidget with his wedding ring. ----- "Oh sugar...." Isabel moved over and slipped an arm around his shoulders. She had a pretty good idea what that meant. "I'm so sorry, honey." She kissed his temple and slowly rubbed his back. ----- "Kind of sucks finding out you've only got about 13 years left." He downed the rest of the water and set the glass down before resting his head on her shoulder. He reached up and wiped at his eyes as tears threatened to start falling. ---- "That doesn't mean anything, Steve. They keep finding new treatments for stuff all the time. And Henry is figuring out the equipment in the medbay. Maybe he can come up with some way to fix it...." She just kept rubbing circles on his back. ---- "That takes time." He cleared his throat. "I've already talked to Richie about it. Sure, there's research and everything but..." He sighed heavily. "Surgery is my best option and we can't even guarantee that I'd survive that." He sat up just enough to look at her. ----- "You can't give up, hon. Now that they know what to keep an eye on, anything is possible." Isabel picked up her own glass and took a drink. ---- "There is....one other option." Steve just looked at her for a moment. ----- Isabel downed the rest of her water and leaned back against the couch. "Steve....it's not a good option." She'd really been hoping it wasn't coming to that. ---- "Sometimes the only option is a bad option." He scratched the back of his neck. "I just....there's no guarantee that I'll make it long enough for them to find a way to fix this and even if they do, I might not be in good enough health to do anything about it." He wiped at his eyes again. "Isabel....he never moved on. Ten years and he was still alone. I can't...." He sniffled. "I can't do that to him." ---- Isabel pulled Steve into a hug and just held him for a moment. It was such a bad idea, but he did make a lot of good points. "That the only reason?" ---- Steve held onto Isabel and just let the tears roll down his cheeks. "I can't live my life knowing that there's a time bomb in my chest just waiting to go off. Knowing that anything at any time could set it off and then I'd just be gone..." He sniffled again. ----- Isabel sighed. He was way too young to be worrying about things like that. He'd already dealt with so much in his life. "It's not easy magic, Steve. And you have to be very precise or something could go very wrong." She moved back a little to look him in the eye. "Cheating death isn't something that can be done with just the snap of my fingers. It needs time." ----- Steve was quiet for a moment as he thought about what she said. When it all came down to it, he was willing to take the risk. He sat up straight and just nodded. "Okay." --- Isabel sighed again. "Alright. Think about exactly what you want to say and then say it. Make sure that you word it just the right way." ---- Steve nodded and chewed on his lip as he thought about how to word the wish. There was only one way that he could think of to word it and he hoped that it didn't leave a lot of room for problems. ---- "You ready?" Isabel asked as she watched him. ---- "Yeah." Steve took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He closed his eyes and just tried to relax before looking at Isabel again. "I wish that my heart was healthy." ----- Isabel nodded. Instead of the usual snap of her fingers, she placed her hand flat against his chest. A blue light spread from the palm of her hand, covering an area just bigger than her hand. After a few seconds, the light disappeared and Isabel kissed his forehead. "I hope that helps, sugar." She sighed again. ---- "Me, too." He nodded and gave her a hug. "Thank you." ---- "Let's wait and see what happens before you thank me, hon." She chuckled softly but there was no humor in it. Silently she prayed that everything would be okay. ---- Steve nodded and kissed her cheek before getting to his feet. "It's all gonna be good. I know it." He smiled. ---- Isabel got to get feet and walked him to the door, giving him one last hug before opening the door for him. "I hope so, sugar. I really do." She offered him a smile as he left her apartment. Isabel went back over and flopped down on the couch, sighing heavily. "Please let everything actually be okay." |