InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "You're so obvious"

mr. bucket; buckets of fun (sgt_barnesjb) wrote in snapthread,
@ 2019-03-13 08:09:00

Entry tags:

bucky barnes (mcu), steve rogers (mcu)

WHO: Bucky Barnes (MCU) and Steve Rogers (MCU)
WHAT: Hey, you're here too. Yup.
WHERE: Outside of where Steve's living
WHEN: Evening
RATING: Low, maybe some swears and feels we'll see.

Everything was confusing and nothing made sense. Bucky was trying not to overthink, to venture into territory with no answers because he knew it wouldn't get him anywhere at the moment. He'd learned a few things in the short time he'd been there. Thinking smaller, to the more immediate situation surrounding him was also very confusing. In his welcoming with America, he'd learned that there was a Steve Rogers and a Tony Stark in what he'd also learned was now called Starklandia (really). He'd also found out that Stark knew him. He was guessing, based on a comment Stark made that meant that Steve knew him, too. Of course, immediately, he wanted to go to Steve because that was just sort of instinctual for him. But he hadn't, not yet. Honestly he didn't even know if Steve knew he was there, if Stark told him or anyone else. He doubted it, since Steve hadn't come looking for him. There was a reason Bucky was lurking, but he didn't think he could do it forever. He just needed to do some observation, first.

And he had. Which was exactly why he'd stayed away. Steve, who he was 99.9% sure was the Steve he'd known forever, was living with Tony Stark. He didn't really understand why that was, but that was Steve's business. Last he knew, they were at odds and a lot of that had to do with him -- Bucky. If Steve was trying to survive in this place with Stark, Bucky didn't want to cause problems with that. He didn't want to be the cause for a rift, again. But this place wasn't that big, and he'd engaged in a brief interaction with Stark that didn't immediately lead to a manhunt so he figured that would mean it was safe to talk to Steve. Maybe.

So he decided to wait. Outside, across from where he'd seen Steve and Stark coming and going. Bucky wasn't really sure what to think, say, or do. But he needed to see Steve. He needed to know where and when he was from, too. He leaned himself against a tree, waiting for some sort of sign of life to emerge -- hopefully of the Rogers variety, as opposed to the alternative.

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captainhandsome
2019-03-28 12:37 am UTC (link)

Steve knew that feeling, of not focusing on pain or needs and then when you started addressing them how intense they could be. But there was plenty of food and water and Steve had time, they all had nothing but really. They weren't the same as they'd been before the war, there had been so much lightness then, all gone now and replaced with hard edges. But there was still that sense of brotherhood and belonging, nothing in the world could be too bad, because they were there together.

"Yeah, yes I know," Steve nodded as he poured them some water and returned to sit on one of the upturn barrels. That wasn't the ideal point to come from, although it meant unlike Peter he wouldn't remember what had come next. But he was going to ask, that Steve knew.

He sighed as he took a sip of water, more to give himself a moment than because he was actually thirsty. "We lost," Steve finally said, because that summed it up. "We lost and-" he cleared his throat before he looked back at his friend. "You were gone."

Again.

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sgt_barnesjb
2019-03-29 06:31 pm UTC (link)

Listening as Steve spoke, his suspicions were confirmed. They were from around the same time. Steve was a little ways ahead of him though, and the news he brought with him wasn't exactly good. So, they'd lost. Bucky hadn't been feeling terribly optimistic when he'd been presented with a shiny new Wakandan made arm and subsequently informed of what was coming. He'd felt a little bit better when Princess Shuri presented him with a new ensemble to wear into battle. It had looked like an upgraded version of his Howling Commandos uniform and he had to give her credit for the attention to detail. It reminded him of before, when he felt like they'd be able to get through anything being led by Steve no matter how bleak things seemed to be. His hope wavered a little while he was arming himself with weapons, and never really rose above giving them a fifty/fifty shot of winning. Even so, to hear they lost was a hard blow to take.

But it got worse.

There was a heaviness to Steve's tone as he revealed that they'd lost, and it felt even heavier when he revealed that next detail. That had been the whole thing they were trying to avoid, wasn't it? Wiping out half of the universe? Bucky apparently had ended up on the half that was wiped out. He couldn't imagine what they must've been like, or looked like, or who else they knew who'd vanished. "Shit," he cursed softly, and ran his human hand through his hair, all the way down to the tips at his shoulders. He tugged at the ends and then let go, letting his hand fall back to his side. "Dammit." He cursed again, a little louder. It was so frustrating to learn what was to come back from where he'd been. And it hurt his heart knowing history kept repeating itself with the two of them being separated in one way or another.

"I'm sorry, I-- How long for you has it been since that happened?"

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captainhandsome
2019-03-30 12:05 am UTC (link)

Steve hadn't been optimistic when faced with what was before them, but he also had no experience with actually losing. When it came down to it, his team had always come together and been the exception. They'd pulled through and goodness, perhaps by The Grace of God had prevailed. But not then, and that tore at him, kept him awake at night and lay heavy on his shoulders. Had they been wrong to fight? Had he been the weak link? Had his feud with Tony been what caused the deaths of countless beings across the universe. He looked away, not really looking at anything just looking as that swirl of panic teased the edges of his vision. So Steve breathed slow and even, focused on where his feet lay on the ground and kept him connected to something.

What else was there to say? Dammit was about it. Steve set down his cup and ran both hands through his hair before bracing his elbows on his knees. "Over a month," he said with a little shrug, the apology appreciated but not acknowledges.

"And now I don't know, you're here, where's here? Can we regroup and try again? What's brought us here?" There was only questions and Steve sighed rather than work himself up into some ranting and grief stricken man. "I just don't know."

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sgt_barnesjb
2019-03-31 07:07 am UTC (link)

There really wasn't much else to say about it. They'd lost. Half of the universe was gone, Bucky included. He didn't have it in him to ask Steve who else had vanished. It wasn't fair to drag that up and the hurt that went along with it. Steve already likely was carrying most of that weight anyway, if Bucky had to guess. What could they have done? It wasn't as though Thanos had picked and chosen who lived and who died. And even if there had been a choice, Bucky would've preferred to be the one out of the two of them to go. Steve had more to give to the world, and the other Avengers needed him even if they were frayed and scattered all over the place. It wasn't fair for Steve to have that on his shoulders either, but that was the way things were. Or had been. They were in a different place entirely now.

Bucky's gaze had fallen to the ground because it was easier to look there than anywhere else while he processed everything that had been said, and the fact that they had indeed lost. He appreciated that Steve wasn't trying to put on a brave face in front of him, assuring him that they would manage and get through it. He was being honest; he didn't know what to do. He was just as lost as everyone else and he wasn't afraid for Bucky to know it. They didn't keep secrets; never had. It wasn't them.

Slowly, he looked over at his best friend and reached out, resting his human hand on Steve's shoulder. Physical contact felt important right now, since he'd apparently vanished from the world back home. "I don't know either," he said. "But whatever it was brought me to you. Whether the intent behind all of this was good or malicious, I can't help but feel a little grateful for at least that part."

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captainhandsome
2019-04-03 06:59 am UTC (link)

Steve felt like the weight of half the universe sat on his shoulders, it felt like it had come down to him, they'd trusted him and he'd lead them into defeat. How many times was he supposed to watch people slip through his hands? To feel that loss? It already felt unbearable. But Steve did what he always did, picked himself up and put one foot in front of the other. So now to be here? With long quiet days, not running or hiding? Sure people hated it but there was a part of Steve, a big part, that had preyed for it. A chance to stop, to rest, to live. Steve was tired and it was the kind of tired that went past a good nights sleep, that held onto your bones and he knew Tony could see it, Bucky would too.

They both but on their brave faces, not looking at each other as they processed alone but together. There was an ease to it, familiar and Steve sighed as he closed his eyes.

Even with his eyes closed he felt Bucky's hand coming, he didn't startle or even open his eyes, his head tilting forward slightly. "What poem did you steal that line from?" Steve asked as he slowly lifted his head, a little smile in the corner of his mouth.

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