InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Aaaamazing."

Steve Rogers (captainhandsome) wrote in snapthread,
@ 2019-05-09 14:00:00

Entry tags:

bucky barnes (mcu), steve rogers (mcu)

Who: Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes
What: A Talk.
When: Evening
Where: Bucky's
Rating: Look. I don't know what's happening up in here, hold onto your butts.

It could never be said that Steve Rogers was a fool. He was good at people, he was quick to understand them. But with the people he knew? Well Steve might have been an expert. He spoke fluent Natasha and could speak Bucky's facial expressions near flawlessly. Tony was- well that was more complicated. But he knew when something was happening with his makeshift wayward family and he knew when there was something he wasn't being told. It wasn't anyone's responsibility to fill him in, mind you, people were entitled to their lives and their secrets. But Bucky was. Well. Bucky was different and he was Steve's business.

Natasha's arrival had rocked them all. But what he hadn't expected was for it to rock Bucky. Because they didn't know each other that well. Or so he'd thought. But Steve was wrong, she'd called him James and thought he hadn't noticed. Steve always noticed. Maybe not having a life made you more aware of everyone elses, or something.

That night in the bar he'd watched Tony and Bucky argue and he'd let it go, let them figure it out for themselves and in time, well they'd talk in time. Steve had been telling himself that since they were fourteen years old. Because it was easy, it meant keeping him and them as it was and it meant not losing him, not any part of him.

You couldnm't lose something that wasn't yours.

It was dark when Steve finished his run, because he was at the point where he was running three times a day to burn off all that nervous energy. He showered quick and then changed, his feet already carrying him before his head caught up. Steve knocked on Bucky's doorframe, leaning against it as he crossed his arms. "Hey you."

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

Goodbye.

captainhandsome
2019-05-19 08:20 am UTC (link)

Bucky had dragged Steve to enough dances and he'd had enough girls give him a vague once over to know he hadn't wanted to be there. He'd told himself he was waiting for someone special, but the truth was the one he'd wanted to dance with, well that would have caused a scene. Not only that it would have been dangerous for the both of them. But he went sometimes, pretending it wasn't just because he wanted to watch Bucky move to the music and hope maybe his friend would come home alone with him. But on the nights that he didn't he'd come home late, smelling of someone else and his heart had broken time and time again. But in that moment, they had that first dance, Bucky's body warm and solid and alive.

There were tears in his eyes and he blinked them slowly away, focusing on the sway of their dance. Bucky held him like a lover, which they'd never got to be and Steve held him right back. He could almost picture it, how it would be, even though they both knew that it never could.

Together they could relearn how to be a family, to be brothers and love one another in a way that was healthier. They'd led each other on for too long, Bucky loved Natasha and Steve, well he'd made his choice. "Good because that's never going to happen."

Steve left Bucky's hand on the back of his neck, but took his other to rest on his chest, moving it to cover his heart. "We always do," he said softly. They'd come back to life for each other time and time again, being strong and getting through this couldn't possibly be as hard as that. Steve didn't know how long they stood there dancing, minutes or hours, holding each other, lips brushed together and holding tight until they were finally ready to let go.

But he'd never forget it.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -